Thread for discussions about selfharm and mutual supportwinter is here stay cozy friends hey>How are you doing today?>Any plans for today?>When was the last time you hurt yourself?>Why did you hurt yourself?>Is there anything bothering you right now?
hiiiHere's a bunch of helpful links> long list of self harm alternatives (thank you muddy):https://imgur.io/a/7Q2zgw7> first aid post cuting:https://www.lifesigns.org.uk/first-aid-for-self-injury-and-self-harm/> wound care guide:https://docs.google.com/document/d/1CsvJs8qNCVkHWHKekMSmCn6qn0GBEcgnq9fIqlA6Uv0/mobilebasic>a bpd workbook:https://d-pdf.com/book/1781/read> bpd Information Book (anon said it's exceptionally good)https://annas-archive.org/md5/1a4f329474320214a120a4d553c6b60c>a bdbt (dialectical behavioral therapy)workbook is intended for BPD but can work for anyone:https://cursosdepsicologia.com.ar/wp-content/uploads/2021/05/THEDIA1.pdfPlease don't post any drastic images and if you have to, spoiler them
Morning /cat/. First btw>>83260925>>How are you doing today?Pretty annoyed, lost my headphones yesterday so I've missed 2 days of gym. If they're still lost come Monday I'll workout without them. Also makes the bus infinitely more annoying.>>Any plans for today?Working on assignments, and movie if ai got time. Should have plenty if I don't procrastinate.>>When was the last time you hurt yourself?November of last year.>>Why did you hurt yourself?Frustration with my lack of direction.>>Is there anything bothering you right now?I had a dream I failed college and music relating to it started playing in my head. Bad omen and a sign I should stop being lazy.
>>83260925Hi everyone :3I hope you are all doing well, and that you will be well if not.It seems that the last general has finally gone down. It was up for a while. I hope you are doing well, /cat/. Anyway, what chapter of Suicide Boy is the picture from? Or is it from official art?
Hello friends.>How are you doing today?I was really, really congested last night and thought I was dying. This morning I feel a lot better, although I'm sneezing constantly. I looked into it and apparently there's an active flu strain here, so it was probably that.>Any plans for today?Finishing off another drawing, (hopefully) starting the last one.>When was the last time you hurt yourself?Earlier today, if you count emotionally.>Why did you hurt yourself?I worry for my hime-sama and myself. It's the scab I keep prodding. I know she's doing the same.>Is there anything bothering you right now?Same old, same old.>>83260987>lost my headphones yesterday so I've missed 2 days of gymThat sucks. My headphone cable broke earlier in the month and I had to wait a really long time for replacement to arrive. Commuting without headphones sucks. I don't think I could manage without them. It's pretty overwhelming without noise cancelling too.
hey guys. normalfag here. my groupchatfriends have started getting back into homestuck, which i've never read and don't intend to, but we've been dicking around on dreambubble (roleplay site). they both got really into a self harm themed one where they and this rando were toxic exes who cut each other and shit. i can't tell if they thought it was funny or were getting off on it but it bothered me a lot. it reminded me of my first girlfriend and i realized that i could have ended up like the character in the roleplay very very easily if i hadn't left when i did. wow! pathetic and unimportant! this past week i spent thanksgiving break with my parents. being at home was the first place i've been that my recent ex had also been since we broke up. i spent most of the time very sad about her, even though i know leaving her was the right thing to do. i think i've been pretending i'm handling the breakup better than i am. i'm quite frayed. i doubt i'll start hurting myself but that could very well be cope too. i don't know.>>83261838i'm sorry about the flu. it's that time of year. november casts a sneezing shadow over us all. what are you drawing? how are those coming along?>>83260987good luck with your assignments. you have enough time before the end of the semester to get out of any holes, i think. what music relates to failing for you?
playin peak rn :33
The tree is up and rest of the gifts have been bought. I'm officially all ready>>83260925hey hey cat, how's it going?>winter is herequite cold here already. Trying to keep warm, but don't want to run the heat so kinda trying to tough it out>>83260987hi anon> lost my headphones good luck finding them> I've missed 2 days of gym. you have a hard time working out without music? I only ever used wired headphones and struggle to do anything with those so would always work out in silence>Should have plenty if I don't procrastinate.and good luck with this. Everyday I'm thankful I don't have to deal with school anymore hearing people talk about these things>>83261515hi anon, hope you're doing well too!>>83261838hey discanon>really congested last night and thought I was dyingthat's awful sorry. Anything you can take that helps?>Finishing off another drawingInterestingly enough, I kinda want to try drawing again. I always sucked, but I was kinda impatient times I've done it and had someone wayching me last time. So gonna avoid that this time around>>83262476hey anon! Were you the one posting about having multiple gf's who were self harmers?>bothered me a lot.unfortunately a lot of weird stuff out there like that. End of day, shouldn't let it bother you too much. Disturbed people can do what they will among themselves. Important thing is realizing they're in the wrong yourself.> i'm quite frayednothing wrong with that. Don't think it's something you ever really get used to even after going through it multiple times
>>83262887>were you the one posting about having multiple gf's who were self harmers?yeah, that was me. thank you for remembering! and you're right. i think this breakup is worse than the others cause it's the first time i met the girl physically after doing my time in the edater mines on the first couple. c'est la vie. good job on your christmas preparations your giftrecipients are gonna LOVE it
>>83263046> first time i met the girl>the edater minesthat would do it, yeah. Not saying online relationships can't hurt too (I was in one when I was in high school since I was at an all guy school and didn't know girls), but felt like i got hit by a train it took months to recover from when I split my first ex I dated irl>good job on your christmas preparationsthanks! Last year I was out of it all christmas season, so trying to make the most of this one. You got any plans for it/shoping for anyone?>LOVE itI hope so. Some are way easier to shop for than others, but I'm done with the important ones, which is all that matters to me
>>83263344i don't know. one of my friends is getting big into holiday shopping this year and i feel some pressure to do the same, but i never really did it before since hanukkah isn't a very big deal. this is my first year really having an offline friend group to bother getting gifts for. i figure i'll hit up some local trinket shop type places soon and poke around. and yeah offline hits crazy. i never really missed my online exes- they both turned into friends and the breakups were really amicable. this is like whoa she might be dead and i wouldn't know and i miss her. i'm hoping it doesn't take months... i only have so long left in college and there's pressure to Find my Future and all that
>>83263384Even if you don't normally, I don't think it needs to be a stressful experience. Shouldn't ever feel compelled to, but there's some fun to it just browsing and finding stuff that might be good. I have a Jewish brother in law who said the same thing about Hanukkah and was hesitant to get involved in gift exchanges as a result, but nobody should expect much as long as you put some thought in I feel> the breakups were really amicablefor me that was my first irl one too, but still got me really bad. For my case it was largely family issues in the way which made things really shitty>doesn't take monthsevery one is different. Might be sooner, might not. Just try not to let it have you too down in the meantime so you don't let it interfere with other parts of life> Find my Future and all thatwhile it's best to have as much as you can figured before you wrap up school, not the end of the world either. It was like 3 or 4 years after I finished college before I really started getting on the right track. Always time to figure stuff out
>>83263609that's all good to hear. thanks, officeanon :)
>>83260987hello o/>First btwas always :D>lost my headphonenoo :<are you going to get new ones?>Bad omenI feel it's just a reflection of you being unsure and stressed about it>>83261515Heya :D>hope you are all doing well,thank you u too!how are you btw?>Suicide Boy is the picture from? Or is it from official art?I got it form here https://danbooru.donmai.us/posts/3069308?q=lee_hoon+rating%3Ageneral+>>83261838Hello>thought I was dyingoh man :<sounds horrible and like you didn't sleep well >Finishing off another drawinghave fun!what does it look like?>>83262476Hey>been pretending i'm handling the breakup better than i amfo you think you will get better over time?maybe you fake it till you make it>>83262887>The tree is uphuhhh D:>how's it going?pretty goodplayed games and chillin>keep warmput on more clothes! and do a couple of pushups
>>83262476My first gf left me and I still don't really know how to handle it. I miss her a lot. She cut herself which is how I ended up here too. >what are you drawing? how are those coming along?Christmas cards. I'm pretty happy with them. I've got one left to do now.>>83262887>that's awful sorry. Anything you can take that helps?I took a paracetamol and that seemed to help a lot. >I kinda want to try drawing againI don't draw too often since I usually get frustrated with it looking bad but it's fun every once in a while if it's something silly with zero expectation of it being good.>>83264049>you didn't sleep wellI slept the best I have in a while, somehow. Once I took a painkiller, at least. Had a pretty fun dream as well.>what does it look like?I can't tell you that, it's confidential! A classic painting redrawn with anime girls
hello, sorry in advance if I put you in a bad mood, I wouldn't even recommend you read this, I just need to vent, today i nearly killed myself when i was cutting myself ive cutted thru a vein, it started bleeding, almost a lot, and i didnt feel bad at all at the idea of dying, (pls dont ban me if any mods reads this im just trying to vent) and idk how to feel about it, i kinda hate myself even more since this happend
>>83264344update : fuck, everyone is in a so nice and good mood, sorry i feel so bad venting here
>>83264344>>83264378It's okay, anon. This is a safe place to vent.Make sure to get yourself patched up.
>>83264269>slept the best I have in a whilestrange but maybe that meds did something >pretty fun dream as well.oa what kind?>painting redrawn with anime girlscute!>>83264344Hello anondon't feel bad about venting this place is for venting too, feel free to ventWhat brought you to doing something like that? and how are you doing now? did you go to a hospital?or maybe you'd like to talk about something else?
>>83261515>what chapter is the pic fromLooks to be chapter 86 from reverse searching, could be wrongHallo discanon>>83261838>active fluGet well soon.>Finishing off another drawingDidn't know you drew, do post some if it's not too personal.>if you count emotionallywdym>It's pretty overwhelming without noise cancelling too.Yeah, exactly. I hate people chatting their ears off on the phone when their on the bus, I can hardly think. It's worse in the gym since the sound of speech is mixed in with gym music and everyone grunting. I seriously hate it. How are the new headphones?I'll reply more innabit got to do something
>>83264428>don't feel bad about ventingokay, thanks you were all in such a good mood, and I felt like I'd arrived in the wrong place to talk about this ^^'>What brought you to doing something like that?I felt really awful at one point, I couldn't find anything to make it go away exept that>did you go to a hospitalNo, my blood clotted quite quickly.>and how are you doing nowmore bad than i was already and really tired im probably gonna go to sleep>maybe you'd like to talk about something else?Tomorrow I'll come back to talk about something else, something a little happier.goodnight everyone hope you all sleep well if you go to sleep
>>83263923no problem. feel free to stop in to say hi whenever. Good to see other people returning, even if they aren't regulars>>83264049>huhhh the christmas tree of course! I got one this year and have it set up>played games and chillinhope you had a fun weekend. I know I did, just not ready for tomorrow but hopefully won't be too bad>put on more clothes!i started layering more even in the house. Inconvenient, but energy prices are so bad this time of year otherwise>couple of pushupsarms are still jello from yesterday and need to recover before tomorrow D:>>83264269>paracetamol That's good. tends to be the go to for everything. I hate having to take pills, but if it helps you sleep that's the important part> fun every once in a whileend of day, guess that's all that really matters. My mindset going in is to try to focus on that and tell myself it doesn't really matter and no one has to see. Makes it feel at least more approachable.>classic painting redrawn with anime girlsanime is the highest form of art, so just makes sense>>83264344>>83264378No worries anon. You posting I don't think brings anyone down that much, but thread is here exactly for people like you to find. Like the other anon said, make sure you're taken care of and not at risk of things getting worse. That kind of blood loss can be very serious so please follow up no matter what if you haven't already. Just make sure you're okay.as for feeling worse.. Kinda understandable. Probably a bit in shock from going through it all. Should probably back up and try to think of why you felt so bad for starters. But for now just try to take it easy a bit. Hope things looks even a little bit better soon.
>>83264530sleep tight and have nice dreams!!
Hallo normalfag>>83262476>started getting back into homestuckIt's so ass I read it 3 times over>could have ended up like the character in the roleplay very very easily. pathetic and unimportant! I get pretty shaken up when I see those doomed futures I could be living in, worse still when I see it manifested in someone else irl. Best takeaway is to be grateful that didn't end up being you.>i think i've been pretending i'm handling the breakup better than i amFake it till you make it, eventually you'll actually handle it well.>Good luckThanks.>what music relates to failing for you?https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CEEBHrCB-rIHallo officeanon padoru>>83262887>hard time working out without musicIt's impossible, and nah I got bluetooth ones.>and good luck with thisAlready wasted the weekend lol... thabks anyway.>Everyday I'm thankful I don't have to deal with schoolIt's ass and it's disappointed the low expectations I already had, the only good thing I'll get out of this is the paper.>>83264049>are you going to get new ones?Possibly, if I don't find them in a day or two. I just won some small prize money so I'll spend it there, they were cheap earphones.>reflectionBasically an omen.I'll come back when I've made actual progress on homework.
Better head to bed. Take care everyone!>>83264428>maybe that meds did something Maybe. I think I just really needed the sleep as well. >oa what kind?I dreamed about Fortnite>>83264493>Get well soon.Thank you. I should be mostly normal in the morning, I think.>Didn't know you drewNot very well. I think the last time I drew anything was Christmas cards last year. I appreciate the interest but I'll keep these to myself.>wdymI compulsively upset and worry myself these days.>I hate people chatting their ears off on the phone when their on the bus, I can hardly thinkI have to go through a very busy train station on my commute and I think I'd be having panic attacks some days if not for active noise cancellation and a comfort podcast on. >How are the new headphones?It's the same headphones, the cable just crapped out on me. I was really worried the actual headphones were damaged because they were pretty pricey.>>83264530Take care! >>83264594>I hate having to take pillsI try not to take it unless the pain won't let me sleep or something. I took some just now because I have a mild headache>My mindset going in is to try to focus on that and tell myself it doesn't really matter and no one has to seeThat's the best mindset to have. Usually is just get annoyed that I wasn't making the progress I thought I should.
bump, threads been slow past few days.
>>83264940oh this tune is BLEAK. i think i like it though. and at least plus the paper you'll have interesting things to look back on... hopefully you're doing interesting work even if it's boring/frustrating now. but go lock in and report back later
>>83260925>How are you doing today?I'm okay.>Any plans for today?I'm getting ready to sleep ^^>When was the last time you hurt yourself?Ahh, about two weeks ago, I believe..>Why did you hut yourself?Sexual assault.>Is there anything bothering you right now?I think it's multiple things at once, but, because of that, it actually feels very little. I think I'll be clean for a while.
>>83265887>oh this tune is BLEAK. i think i like it though.Right??? First 40 seconds perfects the songs mood, the combination howling and hesitation to start playing. Once it does start, theres distortion on everything. And the crescendo 3 minutes in when the bass overhwelms the lead entirely, smothering the track in noise... it's so good....>lock in and report back laterI got nothing done. Awesome!!!!>plus the paper you'll have interesting things to look back onMaybe, maybe not. I got a crash course in financial literacy when I burnt through funds about 2 weeks from graduation, but other than that not really. Didn't do anything on campus, not really fond of my peers/profs, and nothing interesting happened. Paper makes paper.>>83265970>I think it's multiple things at once, but, because of that, it actually feels very littleGotten that before, past a certain point stressing about everything would make you implode so you just stop stressing. What are the things bothering you?
>>83266687The things bothering me are things in relation to the said reason I cut again, though also general stress as the holidays roll around. It's a very hard time for me.
>>83266706>things bothering me are things in relation to the said reason I cut againNothing I can really say on that desu, I've only dealt with it secondhand through friends. Here's to hoping your assaulter suffers, and that you aren't shaken for long.>also general stress as the holidays roll aroundI don't celebrate Christmas, but I guess it's cause you gotta deal with giftgiving and family? Wouldn't know.missed this b4>>83264949>I appreciate the interest but I'll keep these to myself.Fair enough.>I'd be having panic attacks some days if not for active noise cancellation and a comfort podcast onWhat typa podcast? I used to listen to this one comedy podcast years ago but outgrew the hosts. Also for me it's less feeling panicked and more feeling angry, all sense of manners are lost on public transport.>It's the same headphones, the cable just crapped out on me.Lucked out.
>>83266790That's okay. I'm currently in a stage where it's all I can think about. Its literally a hyperfixation, it's so horrible. It doesn't *quite* help that it's family.. and I'll have to see them again for Christmas. Such a shitty month for those with bad families, haha. I don't mean to complain too much or be annoying. Do you enjoy the holidays?
>>83266799>I'm currently in a stage where it's all I can think about. Its literally a hyperfixation, it's so horrible.Usually theres two ways out of it short-term, that being directly confronting the thought or making yourself busy to where you can't have it. For me I like scratching up my chest up with a dull knife and then burying myself in work to avoid thinking, wards off whatever I was stuck on for a couple hours. Long term I got no clue, I'm just betting on time healing me.>It doesn't *quite* help that it's family.. and I'll have to see them again for Christmas.I'd do literally anything in my power to avoid seeing them even if it means upsetting other family in your case. Don't deserve to lose anymore of your dignity.>shitty month for those with bad families, hahaI've had hiccups with mine (mostly my fault admittedly...) but it's the best it's been now. The worst of it was pretty nasty.>Do you enjoy the holidays?I've never celebrated any calendar holidays, unless you count trick-or-treating as a kid. I enjoy them for the day off, thats it really.
>>83266878Oh my gosh, I am so sorry. I did not see the part where you said you didn't celebrate..Short-term, I do also physically harm.. though my health has made it hard for me to even do that!!!Also ... It's direct family. I can't avoid easily. I'm very sorry. Though, I've dealt with it before, so I know some things that can help..?I enjoyed trick-or-treating, too! And the days off.
>>83266942>sorry sorry I don't get apologizing it's pretty minor>Also ... It's direct family. I can't avoid easily.RIP, what things are you doing to avoid the situation then?>I do also physically harm.. though my health has made it hard for me to even do thatSlight blessing, could help you break the habit. Be better off without sickness or cutting, get well soon.
>>83266987>I don't get apologizing it's pretty minorIt's a bad habit of mine. Takes up most of my vocabulary... I try not to say it so much.>What things are you doing to avoid the situation then?Ah, locking doors, layering up. Any excuse to be in a separate room, you get the gist!I guess in a way, that part is a slight blessing, isn't it? Maybe that'll really help me stop. Once a routine is broken, it's hard for me to continue.
>>83267007>Ah, locking doors, layering up. Any excuse to be in a separate room, you get the gist!Makes sense makes sense, sounds like a plan.>Once a routine is broken, it's hard for me to continue.It hurts more than it helps... my work ethics a Jenga tower.>vocabularyYou've got a strange typing style. Not positive or negative, but different.
bump before school
>>83267092>Sounds like a planYeah! In a way, it makes it feel 'less real,' if that makes sense. So, it doesn't feel as bad.>It hurts more than it helps..Academically, same! It's just good in this case. My work ethics are... something.>Not positive or negative, but different.I didn't really think it'd be notable enough to be commented on.. as long as it's not weird or bad, I suppose it's okay?
>How are you doing today?I'm alright, I could be better, could be worst, but I feel more aware of the physical world today.>Any plans for today?I will read about the day when Portugal regained it's independence from the Spanish maybe because today it's the holiday to celebrate that... or I'll write while I still can. People will visit though, which is not good.>When was the last time you hurt yourself?Some weeks ago I tried to kill myself, I am deeply ashamed >Why did you hurt yourself?I thought suicide was a little less sinful than keep listening and having my thoughts and desires >Is there anything bothering you right now?I fucked my best friend after I came from the hospital, i can't remember most though. I was possessed. I am trying not to die because maybe there's more to life but I know my date is already chosen once I die. Also I cannot get out of the house, physically I am not let, it fucks me a little and I think something evil is happening.
het, hello everyone, im back, i slept like 6 hours, still tired but not as bad mentally as yesterday, ive drank a large monster
hello everyone mornin hello :>hopefully everyone has a nice Monday
>>83266706Holidays are a stressful time for everyone, I think. Hang in there anon.>>83266790>What typa podcast?Usually old recordings of The Ricky Gervais show on XFM. Something about that is just immensely comforting. Maybe it's because it's from the early 2000s when the world still had a shred of optimism. That or one of two comedy podcasts I've been (re)listening to for god knows how long.>all sense of manners are lost on public transportI'm lucky that it's usually fine where I live and everyone keeps to themselves. I'm not sure I could manage in a western country. Getting the tube in London always put me on edge.
>>83267897>I'll write while I still can.Writing is a great hobby, I hope it helps calm you down. What do you like writing about? Creative writing?
>>83260925>How are you doing today?Terrible. My mental illness hasn't festered like this in years>Any plans for today?Go to work. Maybe paint my nails later>When was the last time you hurt yourself?Few days ago. Inaugurated. Thought I'd post here about it.>Why did you hurt yourself?Because I'm trash and I deserve to die : )>Is there anything bothering you right now?I'll never be fulfilled or "filled up"
>>83267973update : nevermind i feel even more bad again
>>83267845>Academically, same! It's just good in this case. My work ethics are... somethingWhatchu studying, I'm doing electrical. It's pretty fun.>I didn't really think it'd be notable enough to be commented onIt's the punctuation and rhythm I think.>>83268074>old recordings of The Ricky Gervais show on XFMNoted I'll check it out>everyone keeps to themselvesSounds nice, but I think public transport itself being better helps that. I regularly end up standing for 30-40 minutes because the bus stays packed for so long. Me preferring to stand than sit next to someone doesn't help.>>83268060Morning /cat/, how's your day?Tried posting on the bus but the mobile IP was banned years ago, never happened before which is weird.
>>83268414hello >hasn't festered like this in yearswhy? has your life just gotten worse and that's why?>trash and I deserve to die : )that's not true >never be fulfilled or "filled up"what do you mean?>>83268986Hey sorry to hear that :/is there anything that could make your feel a little better?
>>83269265>why? has your life just gotten worse and that's why?I think I've been repressing my issues I felt as a teenager for like 10-12 years. Recent events made them bubble to the surface. I feel like a sad teenager in a 28 year old body.I'm even gonna start painting my nails and get a piercing lmao>that's not true I won't argue about you with this, but Its hard not to believe it.>what do you mean?My whole life I just wanted to feel like I was loved or cared for. Paradoxically seeking it out makes you less desirable. I have to like myself first. And god. The idea that I need to be content with just myself seems impossible and maddening. If there was something I cou8ld care less about.
>>83264940>It's impossibleI'm so used to working out in silence it would probably be weirder for me to listen anything at this point. >only good thing I'll get out of this is the paper.basically mentality i have in hindsight as well. Not like I learned much there compared to what I picked up on my own later.>>83264949> won't let me sleep or somethingpretty much the same and why I won't otherwise. No matter how bad things are, I can probably deal with it. But I have a hard time sleeping enough already that I want to wait till then to use it if I have to. Can't do without sleep>wasn't making the progress I thought I should.me as well, but I'm quick to quit things if I don't think it's going well and get very demoralized quickly. Probably my worst trait and what held me back most in a lot of ways throughout life>>83268060happy Monday cat! Hope you have a good one>>83268986hang in there. Try to take it easy and feel free to vent if needed>>83269412>feel like a sad teenager in a 28 year old body.relatable. I can't say and won't pretend my life now is that bad of shape, but I feel like a stupid kid who's hung up on past shit despite being 31 now sometimes.> just wanted to feel like I was loved or cared forassuming you don't have close family in this case? is that right? I feel like that's a common thing with people who feel this way. Mine kinda fucked me over more way than one
>>83269247>>Whatchu studying?I want to study psychology very soon. There, I was just speaking how I used to be in highschool.>It's the punctuation and rhythm I think.Really? I guess that does make sense! I just try being more expressive online because I find it difficult to be IRL.
>>83269450>relatable. I can't say and won't pretend my life now is that bad of shape, but I feel like a stupid kid who's hung up on past shit despite being 31 now sometimes.Imma move to a different city. Been trying to get out more and meet people. But I feel like who I am is a sad emo fuck and no one wants to interact with that lol>assuming you don't have close family in this case? is that right? I feel like that's a common thing with people who feel this way. Mine kinda fucked me over more way than oneI got family but honestly I don't trust them because they're all insane too. Also, I feel like friends are as invested in eachother as life goes on. I guess I want some deep, intimate love.
>>83269553>I guess I want some deep, intimate love.Don't we all..? I manage to distract myself a lot, but sometimes it's very hard. I get it.
>>83269553>move to a different city. might do some good. The thing with moving is it gives you an excuse to know nobody. So when you meet people you can say that. If you do move, try to capitalize on that effect as much as possible. Even if it just gives you a boost in your head, that's valuable. By all means, try not to put yourself down too much, since that will hurt your odds in the end. >no one wants to interact with that is there anything you like doing hobby or interest wise you can focus on? I'd say being optimistic goes a long way, but if you can't do that super well, focusing on things other than you can help as well.> don't trust them because they're all insane too.fair enough. Just wondering before since the one thing I struggled with is the idea of loving yourself when you know your own family didn't. I think people in that case have a weird situation that's kinda hard to overcome. I've come a long way with I know, but it's still not a great thought>want some deep, intimate love.and there's nothing wrong with that either. I think you need to figure out how to pursue that, starting with doing things, even if small, to help you improve the mindset your living with, even if you have to force yourself even while miserable at first
>>83269462>psychologyI'd go crazy having to deal with people on the clock all the time. My line of work is mostly quiet save for the sounds of construction.>Really? I guess that does make sense! I just try being more expressive online because I find it difficult to be IRL.I'm the opposite, I'm pretty expressive everywhere with 4chan as exception. Here I'm pretty muted relatively.>>83269450>so used to working out in silence it would probably be weirder for me to listen anythingProbably a lot more viable working out that way at home. Even when I did do calisthenics at home, still needed headphones to deal with the noise in my head.
>>83269830>I'd go crazy having to deal with people on the clock all the time.It's quite childish, but I've always wanted to help people understand their behavior. I was never granted the same. I feel like it's the least I can do, as someone who can never fix themselves..>I'm pretty expressive everywhere with 4chan as exceptionI wonder why that's the case! Maybe because it's a way to relax? For me, being expressive online is a form of relaxation because I am not granted the same IRL.
>>83260925i burned myself it hurts
>>83269921i should stop burning myself i dont self harm often and ive only done it a total of four times my life
>>83269887>always wanted to help people understand their behavior.Noble goal honestly, don't see what's childish about it. You'd be naive to think everyone is fixable but that's it really. >I was never granted the sameNever never? Not even online?>someone who can never fix themselvesBit defeatist, even if I feel similarly to an extent.>I wonder why that's the case!I'm generally unserious IRL and tend to speak very casually. Anonymity means I can write out my serious-ish side without causing whiplash with the perception others hold of me. The same applies to my journal writing now that I think of it.>I am not granted the same IRL.Who's stopping you? Unless you live in a super cold society I think most people would welcome being more expressive.
>>83269639>is there anything you like doing hobby or interest wise you can focus on?Yeah but hobbies don't really motivate me as much. I am forcing myself to get out to clubs / bars and excersize. Also improving my wardrobe.>>83269574>>83269639 >Don't we all..? I manage to distract myself a lot, but sometimes it's very hard. I get it.I just think about the love I had 5 years ago. Thankfully I'm bi so I can get some partners quicky, but I do miss real love.
>>83270102Noble goal honestly, don't see what's childish about it. You'd be naive to think everyone is fixable but that's it really.I don't seriously think everyone is fixable, I just thought it was an easier term to use.>Not even online?Yes, not really even online. I was considered emotionally mature, and, as the youngest of all my groups, that only mattered if I could offer some help. They don't take me or my vents seriously.>Bit defeatist / Who's stopping you?I suppose so, but I've really made up my mind. I'm stuck here. My environment is abusive, and, even though I am an adult, I don't have much where else to go.>Anonymity means I can write out my serious-ish side.I suppose that's the same for me, too? But my behavior online greatly depends on the platform.
>>83260925hey chat hi catim writing a 15 page essay (due tomorrow) that i do not care about for a class that i tolerated, but hey at least its almost over and i got good grades on all the other assignments >:)my brain has been a little weird for the last week or two, and i dont really know how to explain it, but it is messing up my sleep and its not a great time for that to happen cus i have this essay to write and four exams in this and next week :0ill lock in i guess>>83267897sounds like youre in a terrible haze, sorry to hear that. im glad you didnt die <3i dont really have any advice desu sorryGod help us all
>>83269412>feel like a sad teenager in a 28 year old body.I'll probably end up like that tooThough maybe it's normal? I don't know >painting my nails and get a piercing lmaowell have fun with it anon>but Its hard not to believe it.why?have you committed a genocide?>wanted to feel like I was loved or cared for.there's a wierd thing in life where you never get what you want >>83269450hellhow are you I'm a bit all over the place but okay>>83269921hellowhy did you do that?make sure to moisturize the burn >>83270313hello hello >>83270313>writing a 15 page essay (due tomorrow)x_x are you chatgpt'ing it?>grades on all the other assignments >:)good work :]>essay to write and four exams in this and next week :0that's so muchh DD;when do you get sime break form all those? :<>lock in i guessbest of luck !!
>>83270521oh ur supposed 2 moisture it? it looks like it'll scaroh well
>>83270521>x_x>are you chatgpt'ing it?im using it to organize some notes on a couple articles T-T>when do you get sime break form all those? :<my last two exams are on the 13th both on the same day just two hours apart :(((( aaaaaaaaand thats a saturday bruhhh i dont wanna do it but i cant reschedule them since it doesnt count as a schedule conflict
>>83270606you should look up how to deal with burns to not get an infection and and get some antibiotic ointment in case you get one
>>83270651well they are only superficial burns
>>83269247>Noted I'll check it outIt's very of its time, but in a good way.>I regularly end up standing for 30-40 minutes because the bus stays packed for so longSounds awful. I don't think I've waited more than 10 minutes for anything here, but I can relate for waiting for a really long time in my old city. If you didn't drive you were just boned most of the time.>>83269450>Can't do without sleepPart of why my sleep schedule is so messed up now is because fixing it would mean sleeping less for a few days and I don't want to do that.>I'm quick to quit things if I don't think it's going well and get very demoralized quicklyI'd say I'm pretty similar, although I can be incredibly stubborn with goals sometimes.
>>83270644>organize some notes on a couple articles T-Tooa I'd probably generate the entire thing and then just working on it a bit to change it a little but yeah I'm lazy >13th both on the same day just two hours apart :(((( aaaaaaaasorry to hear this ;w;that sounds so stressful if you don't pass are you able to retake those exams?>>83270707 I guess you should be okay thenbut ya know better safe than sorry and it might come in handy some other day>>83270773hello o/
buUUuUmp :0
>>83270269>My environment is abusive, and, even though I am an adult, I don't have much where else to go.The money you'll make as a psychologist is a way out I suppose, though living on your own has it's own problems. Spent 2 weeks a city over alone in an apartment, mind numbing silence. If your situation is that bad then it's still something to look forward to.>Yes, not really even online. I was considered emotionally matureCan't relate desu I've been a really late bloomer maturity wise relative to my friends, I've only grown up this past year and a half.>don't take me or my vents seriouslyThen why are they your friends? Better off alone then taking blows to your self worth. >my behavior online greatly depends on the platform.I really only post in this thread and on discord, my tones less casual here but I'm essentially the same person.>>83270644Checked, good luck on your essay.
>>83271955Addendum holy fuck it took like an hour to post this I keep getting connected to the same IP as the guy who got banned.
>>83271955hello hey how's it going?
>>83271955>If your situation is that bad then it's still something to look forward toI don't know how well I'd be on my own. I think I would be happy with a friend.>I've grown up this past year and a half.I mean, I still can sort of semi-relate, in a way? I've grown up tending to adults and others, of course, but it feels like only recently I've started to realize how bad my state of life is, if that makes sense. Like just clocking to me a lot of the stuff I go through is very detrimental.>Then why are they still your friends?The question everyone asks, isn't it..? Truthfully, I don't know. I've known them for almost a decade. That could be why. I've probably adapted to much. Regardless, I try being more bold.In some ways, it feels like a toxic relationship, haha.>My tones less casual here but I'm essentially the same personHmm, I think I'm more relaxed on Discord too!
noodgight guys
>>83273115Goodnight, cat anon!
>>83272264>How's it going?So and so. I'm home now so I'm well rested, but I've got a mountain of assignments ahead of me. Also, my mom might've checked my room while I was out and taken my knife as it is missing. Pretty annoying since I was gonna cut myself before working.>>83273115Nights.>>83272655>Truthfully, I don't know. I've known them for almost a decade, could be why.Definitely it. I think my longest genuine friendship has lasted six years, and I've only ever had bad ones last 2 years tops. Also, it could be you're in a rut and starting to turn on your friends as cope, which does happen. More likely though it's what you suggested, that they're only around cause they've always been around.>I've started to realize how bad my state of life is, if that makes sense.I've had the same thing, more looking at how bad my life was instead. Ruminating over why I do the things I do brings me back to the worst of my life. Whenever I do I'm torn between empathizing with or resenting my younger self.>In some ways, it feels like a toxic relationship, hahaIf you don't have any particularly strong reasons you can just get up and leave the group, not like you'll suffer any repercussions for it. Saved my sanity the times I did it, and now my current friends couldn't be better.>DiscordAlso everyone is already used to your humour/manner of speaking etc so it's way more natural than an imageboard.
>>83273310>Definitely it. I think my longest genuine friendship has lasted six years, and I've only ever had bad ones last 2 years tops. Also, it could be you're in a rut and starting to turn on your friends as cope, which does happen. More likely though it's what you suggested, that they're only around cause they've always been around.Yeah.. it'll be six years next year. I wonder if I am turning on them, as you've described. I don't really go to them for emotional support or anything, I feel more comfortable with strangers nowadays.. it's strange. I don't think they're bad though. I think you just have to accept that some friendships are transactional. I guess that's my mindset. I don't know if I will leave them, though, but if I keep voicing my opinions and if they still keep ignoring me, I will slowly distance, probably.>I've had the same thing, more looking at how bad my life was instead. Ruminating over why I do the things I do brings me back to the worst of my life. Whenever I do I'm torn between empathizing with or resenting my younger self.It's the worst, isn't it? I've only really began to resurface a lot of my traumatic memories as of recent, so it's so much worse. I resent my younger self much more than sympathize, though. I always feel like I could've prevented what happened to me, no matter the form of abuse I faced throughout my years to now... even if I know realistically I couldn't.
>>83260925When will thread #666 be here? I'm estimating 2 weeks
>>83273343>I think you just have to accept that some friendships are transactionalNo? Maybe I'm just lucky but none of mine have ever been transactional. Why settle for that?>if they still keep ignoring me, I will slowly distance, probablyDon't see the reason to put leaving off desu, time spent with people you don't really like could be spend finding people you do.>I resent my younger self much more than sympathize, though. I always feel like I could've prevented what happened to me, no matter the form of abuse I faced throughout my years to now... even if I know realistically I couldn't.You can't really blame yourself for being hurt as a result of your naivety, hindsight is 20/20. Hurting others is something else, I don't think anyone has any right to forgive themselves for that.>I feel more comfortable with strangersI prefer talking to myself or journalling 99% of the time, but since finding this thread a couple weeks ago I've posted here. Less for advice/support and more since it's comfy.
>>83273559>No? Maybe I'm just lucky but none of mine have ever been transactional. Why settle for that?I think I am too ultimately pessimistic. Every relationship I make turns out to be that way. I've decided the best I can do is help others in some way. I feel really edgy just typing it out, but it really seems like thats the path for me.>Don't see the reason to put leaving off desu, time spent with people you don't really like could be spend finding people you do.I suppose you're right in a way. It's hard to find people to bond with, though, especially these days.>You can't really blame yourself for being hurt as a result of your naivety, hindsight is 20/20. Hurting others is something else, I don't think anyone has any right to forgive themselves for that.Yeah... it's just easier for me to view it as my own fault, rather than blame the actual people at hand. I think most people wouldn't want to acknowledge the first people to betray them was their family, for example, even if it's very common. It's not a nice realization, which is obvious, but much more grueling when you still live with them + have been living blindly unaware for so, so long.>I prefer talking to myself or journalling 99% of the time, but since finding this thread a couple weeks ago I've posted here. Less for advice/support and more since it's comfy.I love journaling when I do! I would do it more, but my auadhd makes it hard to maintain it, lol. I need to start forcing myself to spare some time for it like I used to.>Less for advice/support and more since it's comfy.I agree! This is a nice space to sort of relax and process. I don't really talk for emotional support or pity, it's just a way for me to process my emotions while conversing with people since I don't interact with a lot of people. It's nice when I can.
>It's hard to find people to bond with, though, especially these days.Yeah, definitely. I'm fortunate to have already made all the friends I'll need. If I tried to make any new ones I'd be doomed, in spite of my extroverted nature. At risk of sounding callous, I feel like everyone around me is too plain and cold to be worth befriending. I've tried.>think I am too ultimately pessimistic100%>decided the best I can do is help others in some wayNot really feasible if you got nobody helping you... and spoken straightforward it's not really edgy, who cares about that anyway.>love journaling when I do! I would do it more, but my auadhd makes it hard to maintain itIn the exact same scenario, I've been consistent daily for a couple weeks but I've fallen off this last week. Forcing myself to journal even on boring days keeps me ready to journal when something noteworthy happens. Having to force rigidness to get anything done is a pain, but I'd rather have the audhd than not.>it's just easier for me to view it as my own fault, rather than blame the actual people at handYeah but doing that'll make all the other injustice you experience seem warranted.>It's nice when I can.Nice way for me to kill time on the bus, better than scrolling or watching YouTube. I'm either posting here, listening to music, journalling, or reading on the bus. How are you replying so fast... phoneposting sucks.
>>83274302>Yeah, definitely. I'm fortunate to have already made all the friends I'll need. If I tried to make any new ones I'd be doomed, in spite of my extroverted nature. At risk of sounding callous, I feel like everyone around me is too plain and cold to be worth befriending. I've tried.I feel like it's rare finding extroverts online! It must suck, though. Most people, both online and IRL, are very shallow and more focused on their phones it seems. Whenever I do go outside, I hardly see anybody talking to each other. I totally understand feeling like everyone is too plain and cold, it's like nobody has manners.>Not really feasible if you got nobody helping you... and spoken straightforward it's not really edgy, who cares about that anyway.I don't think anybody could help me. My friends have said I'm an anomaly, and at worst, a crazy bitch. I get conscious over how I express myself, so I worry a lot about being too edgy..>Having to force rigidness to get anything done is a pain, but I'd rather have the audhd than not.Really? I have such a complicated relationship with my auadhd and other illnesses. I hate it, but in a way, I don't.>Yeah but doing that'll make all the other injustice you experience seem warranted.I think my issue is that I think it *is* warranted. It's interesting how the brain often values emotion > logic, because trust me, I know it's not, but... ahhhh. Just too troubling.>Nice way for me to kill time on the bus, better than scrolling or watching YouTube. I'm either posting here, listening to music, journalling, or reading on the bus. How are you replying so fast... phoneposting sucks.I'm on my laptop, that's how! I have nothing better to do, so I just switch between tabs. Also, I agree, much better than doomscrolling. Back in school, all I would do is read.
>>83273597Missed the (you)
>>83274366>I feel like it's rare finding extroverts online!I've probably met like 4 tops, though being in the spaces I'm in lends heavily to introversion.>Most people, both online and IRL, are very shallow and more focused on their phones it seems. Whenever I do go outside, I hardly see anybody talking to each other.I strike up conversations regularly at college or at the bus stop with students, but outside me yeah it's pretty quiet. The conversations I do have are pleasant at least. There are interesting people out IRL if you just look. I've come across punk rockers, homestucks, navy men and some in between just going to school everyday. Still, the world is too cold.>I don't think anybody could help me. My friends have said I'm an anomaly, and at worst, a crazy bitch. I get conscious over how I express myself, so I worry a lot about being too edgy..With friends like these you don't need enemies... if you can't catch a break around them what's the point?>Really?Wouldn't be without it in a million years. If it really bothered me all that much I could get medicated, but I'm fine as is. Without it my taste in music would be measurably more boring, I wouldn't make the friends I did, and I'd develop into a much more boring person overall. I'd go as far as saying my life itself would've been greatly limited if I didn't have autism/adhd, crazy as it sounds. It really brought me to all the right places.>I hate it, but in a way, I don't.Why the confliction?>Just too troubling.Fair enough.>Back in school, all I would do is readBack in school all I did was stay home.
>>83274653>I've probably met like 4 tops, though being in the spaces I'm in lends heavily to introversion.The only time I think I've ever met a large amount was maybe in like, idk, typology servers. I'm an introvert, but I like interaction now and then like any normal human being. School days were the best because my friends were the very popular extroverted ones, so they dragged me around everywhere.>Still, the world is too cold.It really is, it's sad. I've become more emotional over the years trying to bond with other people by doing so, only for said people to just.. grow apathetic. It's hard to explain. It's like nobody else puts effort in. On the positive, I have had good interactions! I do get awkward fast though, haha.>I'd go as far as saying my life itself would've been greatly limited if I didn't have autism/adhd, crazy as it sounds. It really brought me to all the right places.There are the same reasons why I don't entirely hate my audhd. I love my taste in music, my taste in fiction, my special interests - all of that. I don't think I would have been able to survive my environment without being able to dissociate into my interests in some kind of way. >Why the confliction?Because it impacts me a lot, still. It makes me more sensitive and all the other bad symptoms. It doesn't help that nobody believes me.>With friends like these you don't need enemies... if you can't catch a break around them what's the point?To be fair, the one that called me a crazy bitch was a very bad situationship, though I hate using that term.>Back in school all I did was stay home.I wish I could!! I would get so jealous of kids who could just call their parents and go home. I was forced to go no matter what, which is crazy in retrospect during the peak of the abuse. Zero sleep, bruises. Maybe that's why I was so cold as a child, lol, I was so jealous.
>>83274714I should add on before any confusion arises - it might seem weird that I wanted to go home despite all of that, but it was because I really hated school settings. They overwhelmed me extremely, either it be the bright lights or people, and general shame.
>>83274714>School days were the best because my friends were the very popular extroverted ones, so they dragged me around everywhere.Had the exact opposite, my friend was super introverted so I ended up being anchored to him when I was still regularly attending school. Was quite nice actually, I'd be comfortable doing that till the end of time.>typologyWhat's that?>It's like nobody else puts effort in.I'm in it's not really like that, it just is exactly that. Why embarrass yourself talking when you got a phone?>I love my taste in musicWhat kinda music? https://www.youtube.com/watch v=3zMN9IABKvEhttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dxUJvxP8Gpkhttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6XrIw09oyKg>Because it impacts me a lot, still. It makes me more sensitive and all the other bad symptoms.Sucks, maybe you'll get lucky and grow out of it. Some people are just badly autistic when they're young and shed the negative symptoms with age. My only hangups are getting distracted easily.>I wish I could!! I would get so jealous of kids who could just call their parents and go homeI never went home, I just never left to start. Nothing much to envy, only stayed home since I was bedridden by my emotions. Too sad to move, too angry to be around people.>Zero sleep, bruises. Maybe that's why I was so cold as a child, lol, I was so jealous.Who wouldn't be honestly? I envied everyone for having friends.>I really hated school settingsSame, still do. Even now in college I feel off just being in the building, still hurting I guess.
i stopped taking my meds (zoloft) and cut myself for the first time in 3 years it feels a bit pathetic to be 23 and still doing this
>>83274989> my friend was super introverted so I ended up being anchored to him when I was still regularly attending school. Was quite nice actually, I'd be comfortable doing that till the end of time.Oh, interesting! Usually you hear of it being the other way around. I guess you don't hear of more down-to-earth extroverts tho. You can thank stereotypes for that.>Typology / What's that?It's like the whole MBTI, enneagram, socionics, all that. Pseudo-stuff. It interested me for a bit, was a semi-productive hobby because I was learning more about myself and other people by classifying behaviors.>What kinda music?It's popular stuff now, lol, but Vocaloid. I've been into it since I was a young girl, it's never left me. I'm currently fixated on the songs from Mothy (Vocaloid producer.)>I never went home, I just never left to start. Nothing much to envy, only stayed home since I was bedridden by my emotions. Too sad to move, too angry to be around people.That makes sense. Childhood depression is so saddening, because it's very much disregarded. I know at the height of some of it, I'd bring my blades to school just to cut in the bathroom.(speaking of, my parents stole my blade earlier, so maybe that's why I've been pretty upset today.)>Who wouldn't be honestly? I envied everyone for having friends.I envied everyone for having friends, too, but they also just seemed more normal than me. I struggled with heavy derealization, though, so that was probably a huge factor.
Alalalalalalalaaaaaaa akbar!>BOOM!You just Frier-ended.
>>83275031>It's like the whole MBTI, enneagram, socionics, all that.Beyond knowing I'm ENFP I'm ignorant on how these personality types work. Hazarding a guess that you're INFJ.>VocaloidI've heard a couple of the absolute most popular ones and some astrophysics songs, but beyond that not much. Post songs by Mothy (also you didn't say anything about my songs...)>Childhood depression is so saddening, because it's very much disregarded. I know at the height of some of it, I'd bring my blades to school just to cut in the bathroomIt's especially difficult to deal with as caretakers, so I empathize with my family. People struggle breaking through to their angsty teens, piling illness on top of that makes it borderline impossible. A lot of the stuff I did at the height of mine is too bad to write about, even here.>speaking of, my parents stole my blade earlierMentioned a little earlier in the thread, same thing happened to me this afternoon. If I find another knife without a serrated edge I'll cut myself but I'm probably outta luck.>Struggled with heavy derealization, though, so that was probably a huge factor.Pretty much same, I didn't know thats what it was until I went over journal entries years later.
>>83275175>Beyond knowing I'm ENFP I'm ignorant on how these personality types work. Hazarding a guess that you're INFJ.I relate to INFJ the most, yes, though in terms of the actual functions I align more with INFP. Dissociative and personality disorders make it very hard, however. I'm fine with INFJ or INFP typings for me.>Post songs by Mothy (also you didn't say anything about my songs...)Ahh, I forgot! I'm so sorry! I really liked the first one, I actually saved it.Mothy:https://youtu.be/Tt31439XObA?si=4VRr03OL6uAsYmFbhttps://youtu.be/GSYNsxvvIa0?si=kdx57nwklUE4eFe9https://youtu.be/DS2WN8mJwqk?si=LAQHSAeLdxGnzqc8>Mentioned a little earlier in the thread, same thing happened to me this afternoon. If I find another knife without a serrated edge I'll cut myself but I'm probably outta luck.I don't like cutting with knives. They're too scary for me. But, desperate times calls desperate measures, or however the saying goes, so I get it. At that point, I'd just find a way to use my nails.>Pretty much same, I didn't know thats what it was until I went over journal entries years later.Just imagine when I researched what DPDR was.. oh my goodness.
>>83275203>MothyI'll listen to these in the morning, thread should still be here with the European posters waking up.>At that point, I'd just find a way to use my nailsMine are always cut, and besides, it ruins the ritual of it. You can cut yourself with nails whenever you want, a knifes more deliberate. Speaking for myself if course, not saying it's a good thing.>Just imagine when I researched what DPDR was.. oh my goodness.I think looking into any of it would hurt me more than it'd help honestly. Keeping myself ignorant means I can't develop anything by thinking about it. Sounds strange but it makes sense to me.Heading to sleep now, nice talking.
>>83275338>You can cut yourself with nails whenever you want, a knifes more deliberate. Speaking for myself if course, not saying it's a good thing.No, I get it. I don't like using my nails for similar reasons, but it's arguably the easiest.>I think looking into any of it would hurt me more than it'd help honestly.Yeah, it's one of those things where you need to be mentally prepared. I've been detached enough to kind of not care. Weird.>Heading to sleep nowMe as well, actually! Goodnight.
Its me, Cock-Cutter guy, here i sit again... scared to commit to re-entering the SH part of my life...
good morning guyse>>83275815hello>scared to commit to re-entering the SH partthat might be a good thing why do you want to reenter?
>>83275980Every day stress, gambling addiction, nicotine addiction, alcohol addiction... being a general drain on those around me... just wanna bleed to feel some sort of atonement for it all
>>83276007that's a lot of problems but won't cutting eventually become one of them, and make things worse instead of better?
>>83276163Probably, helps me forget temporarily... bleeding and treating the wound makes me feel like im repenting for the pain im causing those closest to me... kinda like getting a "im sorry" tattoo
>>83276189I'm just a bit worried because you already have problems with common vices so you might lose control over cutting too
just a bump c:
>>83275980>good morning guysMorning /cat/. Moved my alarm across the room, didn't work. I just got up and went back to sleep. Alarm was set for 7 and I'm just up now at 10....
every day is so foggy it makes me wanna play sh2 I probably should >>83277695do you only have one alarm? maybe you should have multiple?
>>83277703>do you only have one alarm? maybe you should have multiple?Yeah I've only got the one, I'll add a couple more spaced out alarms. I normally wake up just fine, I think not having music in the morning is making it difficult.
Good morning, everyone!How is everyone's morning/afternoon/night?My morning is pretty bad so far like any other morning, but also probably a result of my little-to-no sleep.I need to find something to cut with soon before I go insane.
>>83277751>I'll add a couple moreyeah that's sounds like a good thing to do>not having musistill haven't found your headphones?>>83278066Hello good morning :>>How is everyone'spretty good pretty good I'm going to play some games then look into playing silent hill2 on pc >morning is pretty bad sowhy?>before I go insane.just make sure to stay safe okay?
>>83278102>I'm going to play some games then look into playing silent hill2 on pcFun! I haven't played games in a bit.>why?I woke up from a very vivid, bad dream, which left me shook for a bit. Then, I was forced to hang out with my abuser, lol.. even in this weather. I'll be home in a bit. Just want a break, you know?>Just make sure to stay safe okay?I'm always careful, please don't worry!
>>83278066>Good morning, everyone!Morning, dubs.>I need to find something to cut with soon before I go insane.Same, all the knives I found were serrated. I've got pins scattered in my drawer but I'd rather not puncture myself.>>83278102>still haven't found your headphonesNope. I'm ordering new ones today, can't function without them. They're always on sale for 24 Canadian which is nice, BD86 earbuds.
>>83278498>Same, all the knives I found were serrated. I've got pins scattered in my drawer but I'd rather not puncture myself.Yeah, I have a lot of pics too from sewing. I might just find a way to go to some corner store later and buy something cheap that could hold me over.
>>83278381>haven't played games in a bit.why? do you don't know what to play?>forced to hang out with my abuser, lol.what!?! that's terrible >I'll be home in a bit. Just want a break, you know?will you get some more time to just chill out anytime soon?>always carefulokay o7>>83278498>ordering new ones today,hm maybe you should buy extra ones to have a spare?
>>83278381>Fun! I haven't played games in a bit.What'd you play last? I've been rotating between tf2/l4d2/gungeon for 3 months now.>might just find a way to go to some corner store later and buy something cheapMake sure its well sanitized. Also, I listens to the vocaloid tracks and it's not really for me desu. The storytelling is cool but it doesn't sound that good in song, and the instrumental is ehhh.>>83278717>maybe you should buy extra onesI already have plenty of extra earbuds, it's the case I keep losing (which I'm replacing).
hello everyone! took me a while to drop in again. hope your all doing well. guess i should read through the thread and catch up a bit. :>
>>83278910>already have plenty of extra earbuds,I see ao for now you're using the extra ones?>>83279573Heya o/how's it goin?>read through the thread if you have the time and want to but no pressure
>>83279636hey catbro! good to see you.>how's it goin?could be better. still feeling a bit burned out and have a hard time to motivate myself to do anything at all and work is always getting to me this time of the year. it is what it is. how are you, though?>if you have the time and want to but no pressurei had the time to watch a 17 hours vid on star wars outlaws i want to say it was a critique, but it was more of a funeral..., so i should be able to make some time to read what you guys have been up to. ;D
>>83279758>good to see you.good to see ya too!>still feeling a bit burned out:<I wish it was friday so you could rest>how are you, though?I'm okay, I watched terminator and installed silent hill2 and played a little bit :Dbecause it's been really foggy out the past few days>watch a 17 hours vid how long did it take you to finish?>should be able to make some time to read what you guysI guess those it could've tired you out
>>83278910>What'd you play last? I've been rotating between tf2/l4d2/gungeon for 3 months now.Touhou! I play them regularly to make sure my skill doesn't worsen. There's probably been other games in the mix, but my memory is horrible.>Also, I listens to the vocaloid tracks and it's not really for me desu. The storytelling is cool but it doesn't sound that good in song, and the instrumental is ehhh.That's fine! It's not for everybody for sure, just what I've fixated on.>Make sure it's well sanitized.I've changed my mind. It's absolutely pouring out. Also too fatigued right now to cut anyway.
>>83279957>wish it was friday so you could resti wouldn't complain about that, but resting hasn't helped with that at all recently. :/ i think i need to get some d3.>I watched terminatorclassic. did you like it?>installed silent hill2 and played a little bit :D because it's been really foggy out the past few daysa fitting game for days like that. what do you think about it?>how long did it take you to finish?started on saturday and finshed it yesterday. it's a bit repetitive, but he really wants to get across how much the game fails on every level. he even had a five minute section at the end about games he enjoyed playing while he worked on that vid. ^^>I guess those it could've tired you outmaybe i'll do it later when i'm already in bed, so that won't be a problem then.>>83279966hello anon!
>>83280138>hello anon!Hello! How are you?
>>83280166>How are you?i've just been very exhausted lately and work doesn't help with that at all for some reason. :< what about you? are you new to the thread?
>>83280138>>83280138>resting hasn't helped with that at all recently. :/ hmm :///>i think i need to get some d3.yep that's probably it, hopefully >did you like it?yep the ladt had a nice moped and the scene in the bar reminded me of that one anime opening I think >what do you think about it?only played like an hour but it's fun :3oh and I almost finished mario>finshed it yesterdaythat's a whileI don't think I've ever see a video that long
>>83280342>i've just been very exhausted lately and work doesn't help with that at all for some reason. :< what about you? are you new to the thread?I've been so exhausted lately, too... also, I started replying to the thread like.. two-ish days ago? So I'd say so.
>>83279636>using the extra ones?No I'm using neither, I lost the charging case so both pairs are dead.>>83279966>TouhouI've played through the first few stages of 8 with a friend, never beat the game. I've probably spent more time playing Hisoutensoku (fighting game) than any mainline touhou. Mokou is my favorite.>what I've fixated onWhat I've fixated on: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yCW7Aw8ugOI>pouring outNot snow at least. I love shoveling...
>>83280480>I've played through the first few stages of 8 with a friend, never beat the game. I've probably spent more time playing Hisoutensoku (fighting game) than any mainline touhou.Touhou 8 is my absolute favorite! Touhou 6, 11 & 12 are also big favorites. Mokou is also my favorite from that game. But, my favorite overall is probably Remilia. I love Kaguya, too.>What I've fixated onRamones!! I'm familiar :D my family loves them. I don't know if I have a favorite song, tho.>Not snow at least. I love shoveling...Is that last line sarcastic? I can't find the enjoyment in shoveling. Snow is pretty, though.
>>83280390>hmm :///>yep that's probably it, hopefullyi'll just order some now and we'll see. i don't get out much lately, so that might help me to get my motivation back.>yep the ladt had a nice moped and the scene in the bar reminded me of that one anime opening I thinkit's been a while since i saw the movie. i always forget that i can just go back and watch actually good stuff. :p the t2 theme is still one of the best movie music out there. what opening was that again?>only played like an hour but it's fun :3glad you like it. what's the story for the 2nd one again? if i remember correctly, the 1st and 3rd are connected storywise, but the 2nd isn't?>oh and I almost finished mariogood job :D are you 100%ing it?>that's a while I don't think I've ever see a video that longyeah, it took me a bit. most annoying part is when you have to stop watching and finding the part where you left of. really hard to find the exact spot in the timeline as well. if you just click 1mm to the left or right you're an hour off...>>83280427>I've been so exhausted lately, too...sorry to hear that. seems to be that time of the year. or is there a reason?>I started replying to the thread like.. two-ish days ago? So I'd say soah, so we haven't met before. well, welcome to the thread, then. :>>>83280480hey, dude! what's up?
>>83280517>But, my favorite overall is probably Remilia. I love Kaguya, too.My favorites overall are probably sakuya/mokou/kaguya.>Ramones!! I'm familiar :D my family loves them. I don't know if I have a favorite song, thoThey're awesome, I've been listening to them since my current favorite band takes inspiration from them. It's really upbeat of what I heard so far, expected more angst from the first punk act.>Is that last line sarcastic?Halfway. It becomes real labour when the blizzards start rolling in, but I'd rather this than rainfall because it's pretty. As well, shoveling snow reminds me I'm Canadian, which just feels good.
>>83280624>sorry to hear that. seems to be that time of the year. or is there a reason?Most likely a blend of seasonal depression and having reached a breaking point in my environment and social life. Trying my best to hang on, but I've admittedly been more suicidal today.>ah, so we haven't met before. well, welcome to the thread, then. :>Thank you!>>83280633>My favorites overall are probably sakuya/mokou/kaguya.Good choices. I don't think I really hate any Touhou character. I know I hated fighting against Reisen in Hisoutensoku, though. I mained Patchouli & Youmu in that game.>They're awesome, I've been listening to them since my current favorite band takes inspiration from them. It's really upbeat of what I heard so far, expected more angst from the first punk act.That's great! What's the band?>Halfway. It becomes real labour when the blizzards start rolling in, but I'd rather this than rainfall because it's pretty.Yeah, I could imagine. I love both heavy rain and snow, however. Of course, when I'm in doors... don't want wind blowing me away or falling on icy sidewalks, haha.
Hallo yuanon>>83280624>what's up?Procrastinating. I had an hour between classes and spent it all here instead of working. Less and less time to whittle away at my mountain of work... what about you?>>83280689>hated fighting against Reisen in HisoutensokuIbuki was annoying for me, her bombs are impossible to dodge.>What's the band?The gerogerigegege, been listening to them nonstop as of late. It's mostly noise/noise rock stuff but they have more "normal' releases as well. The mythos behind the band is also really interesting, insane stunts and very limited footage.>when I'm indoorsWhere's the fun in that?
>>83280822>Ibuki was annoying for me, her bombs are impossible to dodge.I played Ibuki to ragebait my friend, lol. Yuyuko and Yukari are so OP, tho.>The gerogerigegege, been listening to them nonstop as of late. It's mostly noise/noise rock stuff but they have more "normal' releases as well. Ohh, I recognize them from one of the songs you sent!>Where's the fun in that?The scenery, I suppose. I am very frail and weak from health issues, so it doesn't take a lot to get me sick or cold (anemia.) Been having flare-ups of that, too, so it doesn't help in the cold weather. It's probably not as fun as being outside.
>>83280689>Most likely a blend of seasonal depression and having reached a breaking point in my environment and social life.sounds like a dreadful combination. :/ what happened?>Trying my best to hang on, but I've admittedly been more suicidal today.that's bad. can you distract yourself somehow?>>83280822>Procrastinating. I had an hour between classes and spent it all here instead of working.at least you're in good company that way and a day spent with friends is never a waste. (^-^)>Less and less time to whittle away at my mountain of work...maybe you could work out less or do a body weight session instead of a gym one here and there, so you'd save yourself the trouble of transit and some time as well?>what about you?just playing some wow and talking to my brother on discord until it's time for bed. day is pretty much over at this point.
>>83280624>just order some nowgood choice (^^)b>t2 themei haven't seen that one yet >opening was that again?https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=QOAwiusq-vM&list=RDQOAwiusq-vM&start_radio=1&pp=ygUYYnViYmxlZ3VtIGNyaXNpcyBvcGVuaW5noAcBstart's about 2 minute mark>what's the story for the 2nd oneI don't know yet \o/>but the 2nd isn'thopefully because I haven't played any other sh>good job :D thank you>are you 100%ing it?nope but I'm too far desu maybe I could if I gave it more time>click 1mm to the left or right you're an hour off...ughh I know there a way to make it easier but I don't remember :l>>83280480>the charging case so both pairs are dead.oh that sucks :/>>83280871who's the gal you keep posting? she's cute
>>83280952>sounds like a dreadful combination. :/ what happened?It is, but oh well. All that's been happening is my day-to-day lived life, just with more awareness than usual. More assaults and mistreatment. Aside from that, there's just stress too. It's nothing I'm unfamiliar with in its entirety, but it's still draining nonetheless, you know? I hate the holidays sometimes!!>that's bad. can you distract yourself somehow?I'm probably going to take a quick nap or journal. Probably nap, then journal when I wake up.>>83280968>who's the gal you keep posting? she's cuteMegurine Luka! I love her design and VB a lot.
>>83280871>I recognize them from one of the songs you sent!Some of my favorites: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xFfcZRSdeBg https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ymU9vDWVgKk https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qeASLxjAtCo>Been having flare upsGet well soon.>>83280952>least you're in good company that way and a day spent with friends is never a waste. (^-^)True enough, still would've been better to work that hour. It's less than 2 weeks to graduation so I really ought to he more stressed about this.>maybe you could work out less or do a body weight session instead of a gym one here and there, so you'd save yourself the trouble of transit and some time as well?I haven't even been going to the gym since my earbuds being lost also ruined my sleeping/waking. Should learn to rely on them less...>just playing some wow and talking to my brother on discord until it's time for bedSounds comfy. Don't think I'd talk with my brothers over anything but a cellphone, mixing internet and family just feels strange to me. They're entirely separate besides my rare mention of them.>>83280968>it sucksYeah kinda does
>>83260925>How are you doing today?eh.>Any plans for today?Not really.>When was the last time you hurt yourself?A few weeks ago>Why did you hurt yourself?Frustrated with a sudden change of plans>Is there anything bothering you right now?The fact that Ive only ever cut the epidermis. I cut the dermis once and freaked out like a little bitch. I need to cut there again. Its not enough.
eeper timegoodnight >>83281003>love her designcant blame ya>>83281199>kinda doeswhen will the new ones arrive?oh and btw how was your day today?besides you waking up a little late>>83281236Hello >ehis it very bad?>sudden change of planswhy?>only ever cut the epidermisdon't feel bad about itit's not a competition anon and it's way better than cutting deel and needing stitches and other annoying things Say safe
>>83280968>good choice (^^)bnearly forgot that i wanted to order again... done now.>i haven't seen that one yetworth it for the intro alone>start's about 2 minute markah, yes. of course. hurricane.>I don't know yet \o/true. those games take a while to get going. tell if you find out, though. >hopefully because I haven't played any other shi'll just shut my mouth then. don't want to spoil anything by accident.>nope but I'm too far desu maybe I could if I gave it more timeyou just play the way you feel like. no need to force yourself.>I know there a way to make it easier but I don't remember :lit's over now and if i fall asleep while listening to it i don't know where i stopped anyway. ^^' maybe you'll remember it and if you do, you can tell me>>83281003>All that's been happening is my day-to-day lived life, just with more awareness than usual. More assaults and mistreatment.very sorry to hear that. i hope it'll get better for you some day. hope we can help you through your days somehow.>it's still draining nonetheless, you know?yeah, i do. it just adds up until you collapse.>I hate the holidays sometimes!!can't take a break, can you? :/ i do enjoy them a lot, but i understand that it's not an easy time for a lot of people. what annoys you about it?>Probably nap, then journal when I wake up.good luck and see you on the other side. o7>>83281199double dubs! :D>still would've been better to work that hour.maybe. there'll be more opportunities.>It's less than 2 weeks to graduation so I really ought to he more stressed about this.sending you all my stress, then! don't use it up all at once, though. (>u_u)>~~~>I haven't even been going to the gym since my earbuds being lost also ruined my sleeping/wakingthat's rough. it can be really hard to change your sleeping habits, especially when there's something important coming up. will you get new ones?
>>83281613>is it very bad?Just the usual Id say. Neutral.>why?A family member had work so we had to reschedule a meetup to months later when family member number two would be back from his business trip. I just cant stand very sudden changes in routine. They make me want to (and actually) bang my head against the wall.>dont feel badThanks. Thats sorta how I cope. Reminding myself that cutting deeper would just get me hospital bills.Thank you. You are very nice. :)
>>83281199>mixing internet and family just feels strange to me.honestly, we didn't talk much before and i think it's a chance for both of us to reconnect. i totally get where you're coming from, though. had to make a new discord account to use for my wow-sessions since i didn't want to use the account i made to stay in contact with some people from here. not everyone has to know about everything.>>83281236hey, anon!>Frustrated with a sudden change of planswhat happened?>I need to cut there again. Its not enough.you don't have to prove anything to us.
>>83281682>very sorry to hear that. i hope it'll get better for you some day. hope we can help you through your days somehow.Thank you.>can't take a break, can you? :/ i do enjoy them a lot, but i understand that it's not an easy time for a lot of people. what annoys you about it?Family is the short answer. It gets very chaotic and stressful, especially having to meet with ones I don't like.>good luck and see you on the other side. o7I did not end up napping lol.>>83281236>I cut the dermis once and freaked out like a little bitch. I need to cut there again. Its not enough.As cat anon said, it's really not a competition. I used to have this mindset, too. Too dangerous and too risky. The fact you are cutting alone is a sign of mental distress, no matter the depth.
>>83281735>what happened?Me and the family were supposed to go out right before another member went on a business trip. But one of them had work so we had to reschedule it to months later. I dont know why but large changes in my routine really deeply upset me and stress me out. I just freaked out yknow?>You dont have to prove anything to usThank you. Theres a lot of reasons why I cut that are sorta constantly in my head but this type of reassurance helps a lot so thank you.
>>83281682>forgot that i wanted to order again... done now.that would've been annoying Hopefully they'll help you>intro aloneI'll watch it then >hurricanebig city!!>tell if you find out, though.okey-dokey >don't want to spoil anything by accident.have you played them?>maybe you'll remember it and if you do, you can tell meI think you used to be able to click on the timer and pick the time >>83281686>Neutraloh I see at least it's not badthough I hope you find something fun to do>family member had work so we had to rescheduleyou wanna see them?>months latethat's a loong time, it does sound very frustrating >bang my head against the wall.oaa watch out with that, you could easily give yourself memory loss and concussions it's better to not hit your head>would just get me hospital bills.yep and it'd make everyone know you hurt yourself >Thank you. you are welcome anon ^^
>>83281813>I hope you find something fun to doThanks. Me too>You wanna see them?Ya. I miss going out as a family. Its been months since we have.>thats a long timeIt was so sudden too. I dont get how people expect me to just be cool with delays that sudden. Im mostly over it now but I still feel a little bit of a type of way yknow?>its better not to hit your headI kinda do it on instinctPart of me likes the idea of getting a concussion But I know thats bad and an unhealthy thought I should work on. Why do I like to destroy myself so much?
>>83281755>Family is the short answer. It gets very chaotic and stressful, especially having to meet with ones I don't likeyeah, that's pretty much the reason why it isn't for me. just my brother, me and our parents for christmas. just having a good time. did you celebrate thanks giving?>I did not end up napping lol.just means you're gonna sleep a lot better later. which is exactly what i'm going to do now. see you around!>>83281774>I dont know why but large changes in my routine really deeply upset me and stress me out. I just freaked out yknow?makes sense to me. i absolutely hate surprises and rarely like things that disturb my routine as well. i don't even like presents for that matter. i never react the way people want me to react so they get mad at me for not playing the part.>Theres a lot of reasons why I cut that are sorta constantly in my headagain, makes sense. it's never just one thing. sometimes it helps to let those thoughts out, so feel free to share what's going on in your head. the longer you keep them in there, the bigger they get until they seem insurmountable, but as soon as you tell someone, they shrink back to size.>>83281813>Hopefully they'll help youfingers crossed. it's no permsnent fix, but it can help me get back on track.>I'll watch it thenhave fun! :>>have you played them?nope. i just watched a lot of let's plays over the years, but it seems that i have forgotten most of it... fantastic music, though.>you used to be able to click on the timer and pick the timeinteresting. there's also a way to manually type it into the url, isn't there? i should look it upheading to bed now. it's gotten very late again. :/ good night!
>>83281613>oh and btw how was your day today?Pretty light, thanks for asking. My two classes were super short and the bus didn't take too long, so I was home fast. Nights gonna be rough since I'll likely be working till morning, but I can't complain since it's self inflicted. How about you?>>83281682>double dubs! :Domgwtf how>maybe. there'll be more opportunities.I got nothing but exams next week so not really lol...>sending you all my stress, then! don't use it up all at once, though. (>u_u)>~~~Using it all at once to make a stress spirit bomb.>will you get new ones?Yeah I will, it'll take a while for them to arrive. Should be here Monday at the latest.>had to make a new discord account to use for my wow-sessions since i didn't want to use the account i made to stay in contact with some people from hereOh fair enough then, thats good compromise. I've never gamed long distance with my bro, just couch multiplayer. Having fun playing WoW.
>>83282378>just my brother, me and our parents for christmas. just having a good time.The only relatives I do enjoy seeing are my baby cousins. I really want to protect them.>did you celebrate thanks giving?Sort of? Nobody really came over, but we still had a turkey. I didn't like it though. Threw up thanks to ED.>just means you're gonna sleep a lot better later. which is exactly what i'm going to do now. see you around!Hopefully I do soon! Hope you're sleeping well.
sheena is a thread bumper
>>83284477who is sheena
>>83285173>who is sheenahttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rEuOy4eo76k
good afternoon guyz
>>83285973Morning here, I've been up since yesterday working isn't that awesome. What's up?
>>83286116Hello>been up since yesterday workingD;you must be very tired?hope you'll find some random some time for a nap soon>What's up?all okay, I will play some more silent hill today and do some crap for uni, I'm technically supposed to make two projects which will be a painn but I'm not very concerned with it since I won't graduate anyway
>>83286633>you must be very tired?Very. I'm getting lunch and then it's back to work. I have to slog through 2 assignments due back to back and then bus home. Hardly halfway there...>play some more silent hill todayI've listened to some soundtracks and played through the first couple minutes of SH. Other than that I'm basically blind on it, how's the game?>not very concerned with it since I won't graduate anywayDamn why, you dropping out?
>>83260925heya o/>How are you doing today?Meh. Not too bad desu. >Any plans for today?Rotting in bed... got nothing else to do qwq>When was the last time you hurt yourself?2 days ago>Why did you hurt yourself?I lost the only people I used to talk to and now isolation is fucking me over>Is there anything bothering you right now?Not really.
>>83260925Why is this thread so active all the time? Why do so many faggots drive blades into their skin instead of just abusing substances like the rest of us? Are you guys retarded?
Hello friends. My cold is mostly over now but I've gone off the deep end and I'm getting almost no sleep now. My brain just refuses to stop ruminating. The few dreams I have are about her.I'm writing a lot more diary entries and none of them are good. A lot of screaming into the void, hoping it'll answer back.
>>83287058>Very.dang> I have to slog through 2 assignmentsnoo :<I feel bad for you so much shit to do and no energy for itwill you be able to at least rest when you get back and also tomorrow >listened to some soundtrackssame they're goodpartially what made me wanna playsame with persona, I think I'll play that too>how's the game?Haven't played much yet but it's fun so farI expected to not like the controls because I'm playing on pc but they're okay>you dropping out?I am just good enough at uni so that I can pass most of my classes but oneAll the stuff I have to do is just a little bit too overwhelming for me, which sucks becouse I know people with say that all I had to do was try a little more without understanding I'm trying a little more all the time and that one stupid class is just too much Sorry for the little ventAlso I don't like my major at all >>83287100Hellu \o/>Not too bad desu.nice, though hopefully it goes better >Rotting in bedmaybe you could watch a movie or read something or play a game?if you wanna I could reccomend you some stuff >lost the only people I used to talk tothat's sadwhat happened?>>83287111Hellowe're not here just to cut ourselves we talk about lots of other stuff and keep each other's company >>83287187Heya>now but I've gone off the deep end and I'm gettinguh oh is it because you're sick?>brain just refuses to stop ruminating.sounds very difficult :<could listening to some music help?Maybe you brain is going through something similar to withdrawals
>>83287606>will you be able to at least rest when you get back and also tomorrowNope lol I gotta wake up early again to work on the second assignment, I just completed the first now. As complete as I can get anyway, I'll be capped since I only did 20/30 marked questions.>not like the controls because I'm playing on pcCouldn't you just use a PS3/4 controller to try and play it? Maybe even older if you get your hands on it.>I am just good enough at uni so that I can pass most of my classes but oneTough luck, I'm in the exact same scenario if I don't get perfect on 2 writing assignments. Coasting by with a 60 average...>overwhelming for me, which sucks becouse I know people will say that all I had to do was try a little moreIf you can say to yourself that you genuinely gave it 200% and it wasn't enough, who cares what people say? They don't know your limits. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0Tdpq3FRGhY>Sorry for the little ventThis is kinda the thread for that.>don't like my major at allWhat major? Guessing comp-sci. My feelings towards my own is starting to sour, but I think thats 95% hating college and 5% it losing novelty.Definitely falling asleep on the bus again fuuuuuuuck meeeeeee
>>83287718gonna reply in a secky>falling asleep on the bus again fuuuuuuuck meeeeeeemaybe set up alarms? it might be a little embarrassing but at least the embarrassment will keep you awake heh
>>83287606>what happened?Loooong story. There were some misunderstandings and whatnot, everyone went fucking apeshit about it and then everyone slowly distanced themselves from eachother.>maybe you could watch a movie or read something or play a game?Probs gonna play some persona 3 reload or EFT later. might take a nap first
>>83287759Off topic but the boyfriends image is cute. I hate that it became problematic to at least like the aesthetic of the comic.
>>83288040Real. All that drama and stuff is bullshit imo.
>>83287718>gotta wake up early again to work on the second assignment:cat least the end is near >be capped since I only did 20/30 marked questions.but you'll still pass right?>you just use a PS3/4I probably could but I don't have one and they cost money D:>the exact same scenarioat least I know I'm pretty much screwed so I don't have to worry much unlike you >if I don't get perfect on 2 writing assignments.best of luck :<>They don't know your limits.I know and they don't care about my explanationsthey just wanna feel like ithey figured it all out because they're so smart, obviously all after the fact, you'll never hear any advice before something bad happens, it's always after that happenes and always everyone somehow knew it was going to happen >kinda the thread for thatI know but I know you might need feel like engaging with it at the moment so feel free to ignore it if you want to I won't mind>Guessing comp-sci.yep basically I've never been interested in it, I just went there to see if I want to go to uni or maybe get a job and I just stayed there And I would always fail my finals lol but I would then retake them and barely pass>bus again fuuuuuuuck meexwxare you home yet?>>83287759>everyone went fucking apeshit about it and then everyone slowly distancedthat sucks sorry to hear that anonYou can always talk with us but I know it's not the samehope you find some nice friends again soon>play some persona 3 reload or EFT later. might take a nap firstsounds comfy how do you like the game?I've been playing super mario 64 lately name yesterday I installed silent hill 2
>>83288178>but you'll still pass right?That one course yeah, me passing the program still hangs on a thread.>probably could but I don't have one and they cost money D:I'd let you borrow mine if you weren't across the sea.>I'm pretty much screwed so I don't have to worry much unlike youSilver lining, yeah. I don't expect a good night of rest until next Friday.>best of luck :<Thanks.>might need feel like engaging with it at the moment so feel free to ignore it if you want toNot like I'm being bothered IRL, engaging online is totally totally voluntary. If I didn't feel like replying I wouldn't, but I do so I will.>you'll never hear any advice before something bad happensDepends on who you got around you, I've been steered away from the bad before. Not like everyone's waiting on your slipup to chastise you, even if people more often have something to say after that bad like you said.>are you home yet?I arrived home 30ish minutes ago, was falling in and out of consciousness but I still made my stop.
>>83287606Hi /cat/>is it because you're sick?It's because I miss her.>Maybe you brain is going through something similar to withdrawalsProbably. I thought I was through the worst of it but it got really bad again.
>>83283214>I got nothing but exams next week so not really lol...dang. good luck with those.>Using it all at once to make a stress spirit bomb.don't blow up the planet, dude. (^-^;)>it'll take a while for them to arrive. Should be here Monday at the latest.let's hope it won't disturb your routine toomuch. especially with the exams coming up.>I've never gamed long distance with my bro, just couch multiplayer. we played some baldur's gate: dark alliance last christmas. we got it for christmas back in the day together with the ps2, so it was a trip down memory lane. good times. ^^>Having fun playing WoW.thanks, we do. :> though one of my buddies didn't show, so we just got a 4 man party atm. guess we have to make do with some randos soon. :/>>83283391>I really want to protect them.hope you'll manage. sadly it's a difficult task and they'll have to make their own mistakes eventually. good luck, though. o7>Nobody really came over, but we still had a turkey. I didn't like it though.never been my favorite meat either, but really looking forward to the christmas goose. :>>Threw up thanks to ED.man. sucks you have to deal with that as well. :/ i get you, though. barely have any control over what i eat rn and i'm feeling absolutely terrible.>Hopefully I do soon! Hope you're sleeping wellthanks and hope you did, too.>>83285973hey, fren. how are you?>>83288730hi dinon! how are you holding up?
>>83288461>passing the program still hangs on a thread.I'll be crossing my fingers!>let you borrow mine if you weren't across the sea.well unfortunately I don't think it'll happen and time soon>don't expect a good night of rest until next Friday.how much stuff do you have left? one assignment and some exams?>Thanksyou're welcome >but I do so I will.okay :>thanks >Depends on who you got around youyeah>still made my stop.phew so what now? sleep time?>>83288730>Probably. I thought I was through the worst ofstay strong fren! it'll get better, just gotta get through this>>83288815Heyoo>how are you?I'm okay played silent hill and did some uni crap today wbu?
>>83260925>How are you doing today?Cold and disappointed in myself.>Any plans for today?I should be studying, but I got the steam deck on sale and have been testing it out with civ. That battery life is functionally a timer.>Is there anything bothering you right now?Just a meeting tomorrow about my school progress. I dropped a class because a professor was flunking me and not reasoning with me. Now I have to explain that.And I got a test on Saturday. >good stuff.I got a tattoo artist to talk to me about a cover-up. He's suggesting other ideas, and I'm not sure what else to suggest. >>83285973good afternoon cat.
>>83288815>hi dinon! Hi Yuanon>how are you holding up?Not so hot, but I'll survive.>>83289211>it'll get better, just gotta get through thisI try to remember that but I think God is really testing me this time.
I wish trying to kms didn't give me an adrenaline rush and freeze up. every time I try jumping a bridge I get removed because I just stand there. I want to try a train but I know it'll be the same problem. oding just doesn't work my tolerance to so many drugs is so high. I've got a bunch of cheap oxy i know is gonna be nitazenes or similar. the uncertainty of how it'll feel puts me off slightly though, I love the idea going out nodding but not having seizures for hours or some shit
>>83289211>I'm okay played silent hill and did some uni crap todayglad that you are. hope that uni crap wasn't too bothersome.>wbu?honestly, not good. i just feel more physically unwell with each passing day. also no clue how to spend the night. maybe i should just go to bed.>>83289261hey cynic! (^-^)>Cold and disappointed in myselfmaybe a blanket might help? you can get warm and hide under it at the same time.>I should be studying, but I got the steam deck on sale and have been testing it out with civ.i think it's ok to enjoy yourself once in a while. :> how is it?>That battery life is functionally a timerthat bad?>I dropped a class because a professor was flunking me and not reasoning with me. Now I have to explain that.sadly that happens more often than not. good luck arguing your case.>And I got a test on Saturday.i know you'll ace that test. gooo cynic! (*^*)9>He's suggesting other ideaslike other artworks or a different procedure?>>83289660>Not so hot, but I'll survive.same here. guess all we can do right now is to drag ourselves from one day to the next and hope for the best.>>83289672hello fox! long time no see. what's going on in your life?
hey everyone, sorry i haven't been here just been caught up on some things. should be back now tho, got a job thingy tomorrow so hopefully i get it. how's everyone doing?https://youtu.be/--kRq_Z8fY0?list=RD--kRq_Z8fY0this game has good music damn
Hallo yuanon >>83288815>dang. good luck with those.Thanks thanks>don't blow up the planet dudehttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CWY1K468tog>disturb your routine toomuch. especially with the exams coming upHopefully.>baldur's gateDidn't know it had couch multiplayer, assumed it was a singleplayer RPG thing.>thanks, we doSwag.>>83289211>how much stuff do you have left?Multiple choice homework for some classes (I'll just use AI), 1 assignments (hopefully 2 if I get the extra writing assignment) and 5 exams. The worst one will probably be electrical theory since I'm lagging behind on lessons, the rest are pretty light.>so what now? sleep time?Not an option, it'll make me lethargic the next day if slept in the afternoon. I'll sleep the usual time and wake at 6.
>>83289261hello o/>Cold and disappointedyou could get under a blanket to help with the cold and maybe even with the disappointed too>ut I got the steam deck on sale anoo u got onehow do you like it?>functionally a timer.it that that sorta how all batteries are?>Now I have to explain that.oh best of luck with thatI think you did the right thing >test on SaturdayD:best of luck!>and I'm not sure what else to suggest.maybe you should tell him that you don't have any other ideas you like much >>83289660here's a cool video you could watch as a little distractionhttps://youtu.be/JfZxOuc9Qwk?si=HfOOzKJK5rNHmQoBsending hugs fren!>>83289672hello it all sounds pretty scary sorry to o hear things aren't going well and I don't mean your suicide plans not panning out >>83289831>hope that uni crap wasn't too bothersome.it was okay and it all should be chill now>more physically unwell with each passing day.oh man :/where is your d3 going to arrive?>no clue how to spend the nightI could send you some stuff to watchyou could also play wordle or adoptle or scrandle or some jigsaw puzzles on jigex.comand listen to some music while doing so in your bed, I could send you music channels with lots of different music>>83289951Helloo>got a job thingy tomorrowhope it goes wellanre you looking forward to it>how's everyone doing?got silent hill 2 running so I played it ^^>game has good music damnthank u
>>83289951hey chev! good to see you back in action. :>>sorry i haven't been here just been caught up on some things.it's ok. i didn't post for several days myself if you believe that :0>should be back now tho, got a job thingy tomorrow so hopefully i get itawesome and best of luck with that interview.>how's everyone doing?i want to say i'm barely keeping it together, but i don't know if i actually do.>this game has good musicagreed>>83290076>linkthat from the movies, right? i only watched the series way back. >Didn't know it had couch multiplayer, assumed it was a singleplayer RPG thing.dark alliance is an action rpg based in the same setting as those crpg games, so you can just run around and smash some monsters to bits. it's fun. they wanted to use the name for a really shitty remake with a ton of "modern humor" inserted into it. man, i was so mad at that. at least it failed miserably.>>83290081>it all should be chill nowmaybe it's time to get into the holiday mood now. (^-^)>where is your d3 going to arrive?looks like friday. :/>I could send you some stuff to watchplease do. i could use some distraction rn>you could also play wordle or adoptle or scrandle or some jigsaw puzzles on jigex.comalready played wordle and pokedle, but i'll try out the others you mentioned. haven't heard about those before.>and listen to some music while doing so in your bed, I could send you music channels with lots of different musicnot really in the mood for music lately, but i can try it if you send it to me.
>>83290081>anre you looking forward to itif i get the job sure, if i don't i might get a little anrgy.>got silent hill 2 running so I played it ^^nice, played that a long long time ago.>>83290286>good to see you back in actionit's a fickle thing, but if i can muster up the energy to post here i will. my days have been less of a haze of games and alcohol and more of a haze of stress and alcohol lately anyways, so it might not be so bad to destress here a bit.>i want to say i'm barely keeping it together, but i don't know if i actually do.what's going on?https://youtu.be/8qJl6-EM69g?si=SGrjieJ7GQzp4x4v
Hi, everyone. How are you all?
sleepygn>>83290286bideos to watch https://youtu.be/JfZxOuc9Qwk?si=TxeMYvDRaohcj58Dhttps://youtu.be/-7VhlsqeeqI?si=_RqNqepx2JCDO8Xyhttps://m.youtube.com/watch?v=MYWDYS7P6lw&list=PLoeK8V36zVtM3pafCPnQR1Em3riuJiSgP&index=304&pp=gAQBiAQBhttps://youtu.be/rVpABCxiDaU?si=ZiaLmntMaio-9tVV>looks like friday. :/so just one more day :>>into the holiday mood now. (^-^)I should watch some holiday stuff desu>haven't heard about those before.there's lots of funky different kinds
>>83290342>it's a fickle thing, but if i can muster up the energy to post here i will. no need to force yourself, but it's always appreciated if you do.>less of a haze of games and alcohol and more of a haze of stress and alcohol latelyi know it's easier said than done, but maybe leave out the alcohol at least for a while to see if that affects anything positively?>it might not be so bad to destress here a bit.i always feel better when i post here, even if i wasn't in the mood, so not a bad idea, i'd say.>what's going on?got no motivation, no energy and for some reason my body is aching more and more and it feels like there's nothing i can do to get better and that feeling is dragging me down mentally. doesn't help that i got a lot of stress at work. that's pretty much it.>>83290395heyo! could be better. i described in in my reply to chev. what about you?>>83290431thank you and good night!
>>83290431that's me btw >>83290342>might get a little anrgy.so best of luck and if it doesn't work at least it's like training you for other job thingies>played that a long long time ago.did you like it?>>83290395Hello hellohope you're doing wellI'm alright, had a nice day, played silent hill 2, did some uni crap
>>83290510>heyo! could be better. i described in in my reply to chev. what about you?I'm pretty happy right now. I got my blade back, so I can cut again. Probably later.>>83290532>I'm alright, had a nice day, played silent hill 2, did some uni crapThat's good. I was also pretty productive today, too.
>>83290574>I'm pretty happy right now. I got my blade back, so I can cut again. Probably later.i see. just make sure to patch yourself up and stay safe, ok?
>>83290395hey anon im fine, how ya doing? I'm just watching some stuff on youtube.>>83290510>alcohol at least for a while to see if that affects anything positively?hmm well if i do that i feel like shit permanently. >no energy and for some reason my body is aching more and more and it feels like there's nothing i can do to get better maybe not a bad idea to call it a night early then?>doesn't help that i got a lot of stress at work.sucks, maybe try to do something relaxing like a bath or something after you get off work?>>83290532>training you for other job thingiestraining doesn't get me anywhere tho, i need experience. gotta wageslave somehow ig>did you like it?it was pretty fun yeah.https://youtu.be/N8EkGUm9q_A?si=Fw1jW4EkzH9ONHHs
Had a long back and forth with my artist, I'm back now.>>83289831Hi yu>steam deck battery> that bad?No, civ just takes my attention for that long. I just ran cyperpunk for an hour on battery.> how is it?I justify it to myself as a back up pc. It functionally is. But it's still best at gaming and runs as well as you could hope for. Maybe I'll be able to turn into a party console like the switch.>tattoo> like other artworks or a different procedure?He had me throw out a few ideas for a coverup. It did get me thinking that a crazier creature design would be a pretty good for what I'm going for.>test> i know you'll ace that test. gooo cynic!I hope so. I wasn't given much instructions on what to expect. >>83290081> best of luck with that>think you did the right thingProbably, just not ideal.>steam deck >how is itTalked about it above, but I'll add that it's just sort of nice. You can play your steam library on a couch, at the dinner table. It just works.I'll call it a night and get under a blanket. See you guys.
>>83290395I'm shit. My heads on fire and I haven't slept in 2 days.
>>83290621>if i do that i feel like shit permanently.guess that settles that.>maybe not a bad idea to call it a night early then?true. i should just try to get some sleep>maybe try to do something relaxing like a bath or something after you get off work?sadly i only got a shower these days. not a bad idea, though. i'll keep it in mind.>>83290680>civ just takes my attention for that long.stupid me. it's civ after all.>I just ran cyperpunk for an hour on battery.good time for a demanding game like that, i'd say>But it's still best at gaming and runs as well as you could hope for.can't ask for more than that. was thinking about getting one myself before i decided on getting a new pc. maybe i'll get one eventually, but i'm content for now.>did get me thinking that a crazier creature design would be a pretty good for what I'm going for.hope the guy is up for the task. did you settle on anything already?>I wasn't given much instructions on what to expect.always annoying when they do that. :/ how do you prepare for tests like that?i'll be heading to bed now. good night, everyone.
>>83290841rough. try to get some sleep, dude.
>>83289831>guess all we can do right now is to drag ourselves from one day to the next and hope for the best.Sounds about right. Best of luck with that, hopefully tomorrow will be better for us both.>>83290081>here's a cool video you could watch as a little distractionThanks. I think I've already watched this one but I'll give it another look since I enjoyed it.
>>83290841>I'm shit. My heads on fire and I haven't slept in 2 days.Geez.. you should get some sleep if you can.
