I'll start >be me>teacher at local uni>earlier today>It's fucking freezing outside so I wear two layers of pants to stay warm. Sweatpants under jeans.>super tired and dreading the day>decide to have some whiskey for breakfast to get through the day>have more than I probably should have, I'm a bit woozy>go to work>start setting up for class and feel the need to pee>go to bathroom and enter a stall>undo jeans and rock a fat piss>finish up and go wash my hands>go to class and all my students come in and sit down>they all seem to be looking at something but I assumed they could tell I was a little drunk>think "fuck it as long as they don't report me what's the problem">get through class okay for the most part>speech was a little slurred, lost my train of thought here and there, but no real issues>decide to go back to the bathroom to splash some water on my face to wake up for my next class. >happen to pass by my boss on the way to the can.>say hello but he doesn't say hi back, just looks down at gives me a concerned look>fuck he knows I'm drunk>go to bathroom sink>almost immediately after a splash, I snap out of my pathetic drunken stuper >feel warm feeling on my leg>look down>turns out earlier I only unbuttoned my jeans and never undid my sweatpants>I fucking pissed myself and it's all down my leg>my class just saw their drunk teacher walk in hammered with piss down his leg>realize my boss basically saw the same thing>currently waiting for the inevitable email from my boss or HR that I'm firedanyone else have embarrassing piss stories?
>>83284382I am very disappointed that the Frasier reboot got cancelled, this is actually something you could expect Professor Cornwall to do.
>>83284441But he wouldn't get fired because he has tenure, do you?
>be me>first grade>computer class, but we basically just play crappy games on the apple IIe machines>know I need to piss>am fully aware that I need to piss>why am I not going to the bathroom>bro just get up and go what are you doing>what the fuck why am I pissing myselfThat should have been an early sign to my parents that my executive function was fucked up, but no, adhd is fake and I had to wait till my 20's and I'd already fucked my life up to get help for that, when the damage was already done. fucks sake, I haven't thought about that in years :(
>>83284447I was hired last year. Not only am I not tenured, I probably just literally pissed away any chance at it.
>>83284469>I probably just literally pissed away any chance
It happens often on nightwalks, when I drink too much fluid too quickly and/or there just ain't nowhere to piss. Last Saturday I started leaking in my faux fur lined winter sweatpants before I got to a park toilet, and kinda looked like this for the next hour. Don't care if anyone noticed, I'm autistic and avoid eye contact and walking next to people on the sidewalk anyway.
>>83284382When I was in high school I wrestled a friend and we got rough. They grabbed me and slammed me on my stomach so hard I crapped my pants.
>>83284464I peed in my pants during first grade because I didn't want to interrupt the teacher to ask permission to go pee pee. She eventually noticed, and made me go to the nurse's office, where I had to change into some pants from the lost and found.
Nothing more comfy than taking a bunch of dxm, diapering up, onesie, whole nine yards, cut the lights off, and wait. Once it's good and in effect redose a little so it lasts longer and start drinking wine. Feels like floating upside down, spinning on both axises, or sudden acceleration and stopping but you're just in the middle of the bed. Sometimes you can even see colors. Some people get nausea from the mixed up proprioception, but it's rare and unlikely if you aren't the type who gets motion sickness while playing first person shooters.Aside from the sheer comfiness of the diaper, you also don't have to worry about falling over and breaking stuff or getting injured trying to get to the bathroom to pee. I tactically drink heavy the day before so I'm slightly dehydrated and barely have to pee even if upwards of 3L of wine is drank over the next couple days. Diaper is good for two or three goes. After 36 hours I don't sleep much but redose slightly and add melatonin and doxylamine. Turn off music and put kids movies on TV like fantasia, allegro non tropo, we're back, willy the sparrow, land before time, rock a doodle. Anything that's animated instead of 3dcg is good.
>>83286166>bro just put on a diaper and chug cough syrup while pissing yourself alone in the darknever heard this hangover cure thanks anon
