>>83420157
Holy shit he's exactly like me. Similar reason to why I broke up with my ex "online gf". Even down to the whole thing of seeing it as an illusion. I know exactly what he's going through.

>t. 27yo khhv who did the same thing

>>83420169
u haveent added anyone since? i dont understand why you would just opt to be completely alone

>>83420179
I still add people but I refuse to flirt or date anymore. More for making friends nowadays. Wouldn't want a repeat of what happened.

>>83420157
Where are you from and where's he from?

Online is fake. None of you are real. You might as well talk to an ai

>>83420157
>is this how most older robots feel? do you still add women online?
I'm older than 30 and I literally just added a girl from this board but I know there's little chance things are going to work because it's online and I'm old and undesirable. I understand what your guy is feeling, after suffering failure after failure, rejection after rejection, getting ghosted all the time when you show your face you start seeing patterns and you see the past repeat itself. Having to put on a mask is exhausting. I just hope one day I'm going to find "the one".

My bf was 32 when he started edating me from 3 hours away and did so for over a year until he could switch jobs and move to be with me. Age isn't a thing here he just Is Not That Into You. I'm sorry, OP. You deserve to be pursued by a man fully interested in you not having to beg for his attention.
I'm not shitting on you I was in a similar relationship before he was extremely avoidant and always ghosting me then gaslighting me about it. Trust me once you meet a guy that actually likes you back it is NOT hard like this. It isn't supposed to be
Good luck OP maybe try a new hobby or spend time with people you love and try to dust yourself off you are allowed to feel bad about this despite what that fag was saying he clearly had something with you for a minute and you are allowed to grieve that

>>83420188
i see, hes never even been interested in having friends or anything like that so thats why im extra confused. wdym by what happened?

>>83420193
denmark and the uk

>>83420198
i talked to him for a super long time though, like a year and a half, it wasnt something new and i genuinely liked him a lot, i was planning to meet him soon but he always said how anything beyond just meeting wouldnt be possible

>>83420209
yeah, this is what i feared and actually why we were in no contact for 5 weeks already.

>>83420224
For me it was more of a case that I knew I wasn't good enough for her. I caught very strong feelings but knew I couldn't take it offline even though we both wanted to. I ended up shutting things down because I felt that I was wasting her time. Even months later, I still have feelings for her.

Bleh, wish I never met her.

>>83420247
this sounds like the sorta stuff hes said to me, i hope he genuinely at least feels similarly to this and not what the other anon said about him just not being that into me, ouch.

>>83420244
A year and a half of talking and he suddenly gave up just before meeting you? Yeah that's really weird. Many desperate guys would kill to be in his position... maybe he's just too pessimistic and hates himself. From his message it definitely seems like he's convinced himself he's bad for you just because of the age gap. That's kinda sad.

>>83420197
lulz yh in my online "relationship" i wrote most of my messages with ai. i'm sure others do the same

>>83420274
She must have lured him with the hottest Danish pastries if you know what I mean lol

>>83420266
Yeah, it might be the case that he's a bit too into you and is trying and failing to get over you.

>>83420274
It's a weird paradox, but it makes sense once you get into his position. Given the parallels I have with him, it might be extremely hard to convince him, because he already decided he's not good enough.

>>83420157
that's my age and same situation except i've yet to find anyone online (yet alone offline but not even trying)
i wonder if i would feel the same if i had found someone online

i also wouldn't be comfortable dating someone under say 24 as a 33 year old btw

>>83420328
are u NEET though? I feel like comfortability with age gaps is really dependent on your life experiences, cuz why would someone whos never rlly properly lived before feel uncomfortable talking to someone younger? he never cared about age gaps before so i dont think its that

>>83420349
not a neet (but was until late 20s), it's just that when i think of myself at that age it feels like a kid

>>83420157
In some part, I agree with him because it's true that this sort of relationship makes you vulnerable and fragile. As, despite the emotional comfort you receive in the beginning, you cannot be completely free of worries, as the doubts keep on piling up in the back of your mind.

You might be sad now for you've lost an anchor, but understand this: that if he, in his part, doesn't feel the same, the relationship cannot function, even if you mend it by begging him to stay. It just won't feel the same, and will very soon turn exhausting.

You might start hating men, as this might make you feel emotionally exploited, but forgive yourself and your ex this instance, as you both needed a support, although virtual. Don't hate yourself or the others; it will only make you more secluded. Spend some time doing what you like to get back in an emotionally stable position. Don't jump into another relationship now, as it'd turn out even worse without any sense of judgment. Good luck.

IGNORE THE THREAD, IT'S AN ATTEMPT TO NARC LARP MANIPULATE

>>83420157
Truth is, even if he's the one wanting to end relationship, he'll be jacking off to the thought of what intimacy with you would have felt like till the day they put him in a coffin.
Be glad that at least you gave him a brink of joy at some point in life, and move on. Begging will have no effect at this point.

LET HIM EAT HIS OWN POISON. IT HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH US

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>>83420439
Fuck off schizo, no one cares about you. Standardcels like you need to face the wall.

the day mike kills himself i party

I don't like the way he worded it, but he's correct. You just got BTFO desu.

>>83420389
i honestly couldnt even jump into another relationship right now because i just think about my ex 24/7 and have no interest in talking to others like that, ive been trying to just keep myself busy and have picked up new hobbies but fuck, it's just so hard. thank you anon

btw op how did you start talking to this guy
did he rizz you up in some thread
i wanna know how i can find something like this

Fuck off narc

>>>/adv/34060573
>Triangulate. Talk shit about them behind their back. Grey rocking works sometimes, especially when you realize everyone hates them and it's not just you. Many people in this type of situation make the mistaken assumption their the only one who can't get along with the person, when in reality they are probably an annoying lonely loser nobody likes.
Plus if you are lucky you can recruit other people to call them out on their bullshit. It doesn't have to be an all-out attack, just gently bring up how annoying they are and other people will be like 'I kno rite?? What's his problem?"
tl;dr: Use peer pressure in your own favor.

>>83420471
i dont really understand you, sorry. i think ur just making a lot of assumptions based off of your own experiences mike

>>83420470
no i met him back on omegle when it wasnt dead on some robot related tags

>>83420458
It will be hard, but it is the best you can do. Letting go is the only solution to reduce the pain. Loneliness will come, and thoughts of "what ifs" will flood your mind, yet you must ignore them.

> I've been trying to just keep myself busy and have picked up new hobbies.

Enjoy the small hobbies. Read something that'll help you deal with this feeling, but not anything long or too philosophical. Keep it simple, short, and to the point. I'd suggest "Tony Takitani" by Haruki Murakami. It's short and deals with this feeling. It might not give you an exact solution, but maybe familiarity is all you need right now. Just my thought.

>>83420157
kinda true, dont e-date somoene thats very difficult to meet in person. i think its okay to edate if you meet eventually tho.

>>83420157
Fascinating, I'm also a 33 year old KV and I've had e-relationshits that didn't work out. I still want to e-date though. In fact I highly disagree with the whole "online isn't real" discourse. I can perfectly understand why most people would find it stupid, sure, but for me it isn't and that's all that really matters. I like the fact that e-dating makes it so that you HAVE to have intellectual compatibility and enjoy talking to each other. Normie couples are so weird to me, you see people who have basically nothing in common pairing up just for the sake of it, then they get into relationship trouble when they have to actually spend a lot of time together like what happened in the pandemic because they find out that the rest of the time when you're not fucking or making out actually matters. Also, I DO want to eventually meet someone and live together even if I start online, it's just that I'm autistic as shit and can handle being alone most of the time.

>>83420527
>I like the fact that e-dating makes it so that you HAVE to have intellectual compatibility and enjoy talking to each other.

this is pretty much how i feel too. i dont really connect with most people i meet irl, so it was always hard to imagine getting the relationship i crave from meeting irl and online has always felt like a more natural way to build something based on actually liking each other as people first. i always thought it was more of a personality thing than an age thing. in his fairness though, with how things were currently the idea of living together was still very far off. i wouldve worked hard toward it, but i do understand why he felt the way he did. i just wish he didnt. i hope you find someone you genuinely connect with whos willing to make the effort with you anon.

>>83420157
breaking up in chess.com dms, brutal

>>83420590
>i dont really connect with most people i meet irl
Same, people suck where I live and I'm also too much of a weirdo anyway, I don't really fit in anywhere.
>online has always felt like a more natural way to build something based on actually liking each other as people first
Yeah I can't even imagine undergoing the bizarre IRL "dating" rituals that people put up with. You're literally expected to LARP together and put up an act. I don't want that. I want to meet someone I can relax and be myself around, and also make them feel like they're not being pressured to fake it for my sake. My ideal "date" isn't meeting a woman in a fancy dress with her hair looking like it's straight out of a shampoo ad, it's lounging together in pajamas with messy hair and watching a movie at home.
The main problem I've had with my e-relationshits has been a failure to establish and maintain the ideal dynamic which is meeting someone who's also a bit fucked in the head like I am, become supportive of each other and slowly but steadily take each small step necessary to sort out our shit so we can be functional enough to eventually meet and live together. I e-dated a girl from here who was a NEET, she eventually got a job and it felt great to see her making progress in her life, but then she had a complete mental breakdown and went back to being a suicidally depressed NEET, then eventually dumped me.

>>83420157
I can fix her.

t. wizard lv41

>>83420650
yep, the building each other up thing has always been my ideal too, even though i know its probably not very healthy and never rlly works out the way youd want it to.

>but then she had a complete mental breakdown and went back to being a suicidally depressed NEET, then eventually dumped me.

im sorry, that sounds like itd hurt a lot. watching someone make progress, feeling hopeful, and then seeing everything collapse again would mess with anyone. how long ago was that and how do u feel about it now?

>>83420737
>its probably not very healthy and never rlly works out the way youd want it to
Well one problem is that, while a supportive partner is nice and all, it's not a replacement for professional help. I take my meds and in her case it was hard to get her to stick to them at all. You've gotta have some accountability and that's hard to do. It definitely feels easier to take care of myself when I have a partner and think about how improving myself means I have more to offer them, but it's been hard to get in that same wavelength with someone.
>how long ago was that and how do u feel about it now?
Over a year now, I'm not anywhere as miserable anymore but sometimes I still feel like a post-surgery half of a Siamese twin. Her presence just felt so natural, you know? And it was never an obsession thing, I didn't have some kind of romanticized hyperfixation on her, it's more like realizing how much your comfy bed mattered after you lose it and have to sleep on the floor. But for the time it seemed to be working, it was really good, and I keep trying to find the same dynamic again. Someone who can put up with my autism and whose own fuckupedness is something I can put up with and even like.

>>83420157
How what a massive gay lord, online is real enough if when you meet up and cum deep inside of her. Just forget him he's a fruitcake no wonder he's a virgin what a closeted homo

>>83420778
you dont know him. disagree all you want, but theres no need to reduce everything to sex

>>83420883
beautiful that you're defending him, but he doesn't care about you and never will. Just date me instead

>>83420883
you know he's getting his dick sucked right now right? that's why he left you because he found somebody for real life sex

>>83420157
How did you two meet? I need ideas for my own endeavors.

To answer your question, I'm 31 and don't think online is fake at all. I've spent my entire life online, it's as real as anything else. Sadly some people don't see it this way, I've lost many friends because of this who I cared about and miss. Some people just cannot connect deeply online, some can. I devoted all my time to my online friends and they just threw me aside like I was trash.

>>83420157
Idk I'm 27 and after a 2 year online relationship I traveled to be with her and she rejected me. I would do it again but I've been burned so bad idk if I have the energy.

>>83421022
Not true lmao. People like this are bound to be alone forever, anything that feels like progress scares them.

t. Khhv that's did something similar

>>83421198
>after a 2 year online relationship I traveled to be with her and she rejected me
If she was into you it sounds more like you did something weird that creeped her out. Like trying to stick your dick in her ear while was asleep or something.
You horny psycho lmao.

>>83420763
>it's more like realizing how much your comfy bed mattered after you lose it and have to sleep on the floor

:( i relate to that, i hope it gets better

>>83421186
omegle before it died but i wouldnt even recommend chatsites. i thought me and him did connect deeply but i guess not enough

>>83421198
she rejected you after 2 years? why?

>>83420157
>why would you choose to be completely alone?
I'm 31 and after being single for my entire adult life so far, I prefer it. I like the solitude, the lack of responsibility and the lack of stress. Also I'm getting rich because I'm not that consumeristic and I'll never have to spend money on dating, marriage, kids and so on. I didn't even need to move out because I get along well with my parents and I genuinely like living in my childhood room. I live on like 10% of my wage every month.
Outside my job, I can do whatever I want and there are still planty of vidya and semi-autistic hobbies to explore. I'm still very horny but I just fap as always and that makes me happy enough.
My coworkers who are in relationships or married have to do all sorts of shit for their women that I simply wouldn't want to do. I'm just too selfish and probably have always been. My life is already complicated enough with a job, groceries, house chores, hobbies and getting enough sleep. I don't even know where I'd fit a relationship into this.
Maybe I could do an online relationship, but what's the point? I'd be glued to chat apps all day only to maybe get some nudes and horny video calls here and there. I'd much rather fap to my porn collection. If I'm gonna have a gf, I may as well try the real thing, tho as I said I prefer being single.

>>83421523
>i relate to that
Was it the same with your guy then? How did you two spend your time? I miss movie nights and long conversations.

>>83421523
>i wouldnt even recommend chatsites.
Yeah I'm avoiding this, I believe it's best if two people connect through a common hobby, or work on a project together or something that can be done online. Chatting just isn't enough. I've been trying to find a girl who is into art myself to help me with my projects but they all ignore me lol. Not to say you and him didn't do other things, I'm just saying.

>>83421590
thats good anon, most people would dismiss this as cope but i think being comfy like this is probably one of the best things you can do for yourself.

>>83421590
As an incel, I always thought being khhv was the worst outcome. But after reading so many horror stories from nightmare relationships, cucking and dead bedrooms, I've kind of realised that maybe it's not so bad. Maybe I could've gotten a gf if I tried really hard but, actually, no I couldn't have.

>>83421597
video games, chess, watching true crime documentaries, movies etc but we mostly just talked a lot. i just miss talking the most, i miss listening to him talk about his interests and watching videos about stuff i didnt even understand but caring just because he cared about it.

need an egirl to add me before i kms my tag is @dogoutfit

>>83421823
Ah that does sound comfy. I liked it when she talked about books and old movies. Would you like to add me and chat a bit when you have time, maybe see if we can click or at least be friends?

>>83420157
5 weeks is a long time.
>isnt it better than being completely alone so why would you choose to be completely alone
Out of hurt mostly.

>>83422053
hed left me before for weeks (for similar reasons as pic above), it honestly wasnt that long in comparison

>>83420157
He's right. Completely right unless one of you can move to the other soon but it sounds like you can't.

>>83421730
Yea, it seems like the less things you need in this life, the better. The less you can be content and happy with, the better. Women especially seem to be such a huge burden on most men that I'm glad I reached a state in which I can do without. But really, I was never desperate. I kinda felt like a loser at some point in my late teens but then I rapidly stopped caring about what others think of me, which was liberating.
>>83421784
>Maybe I could've gotten a gf if I tried really hard
I'm pretty sure I could've and even now it's not too late, as I seemingly look early-mid 20s and I'm tall and not ugly. But trying hard in my case would mean masking my introverted personality, spending ridiculous amounts of money and doing a lot of stuff I consider to be chores. I'd have to change my personality almost completely and become someone I'm not. And I'd have to become a regular wageslave with how much spending I'd have to do. I just don't see why I'd go though all of that massive effort and financial suicide when I can simply jack off. I have no need for a woman in my life, other than brief moments when I feel like hugging someone and playing with boobs and having sex. But those things are more like wants, not needs, so they bother me about as much as not having a fancy car.
Deep-down I'd love to have a relationship with a connection and stuff, but the reality is that there is probably no woman out there who would "do it for me" and I simply don't want a mediocre relationship with someone I'm not crazy about. And I realize that even if I met such a unicorn woman, she'd likely have better options than me from her point of view, so it's pointless after all.

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>>83420157
>online is fake and does more harm than good
He's right and you should let him move on.

>>83420157
I'm 27 and it's been the exact opposite for me
Would have loved to continue e-dating my wonderful former gf but she thought it was not "real" and broke up, which hurt me
and yes I'm trying to add women online and fill the void that she left..

>>83420157
I am in the exact same position at 29. What he says is completely true. Unless you have a solid plan on how to move in together, or have a timeline on things that spans months, wasting time on pixels is one of the most damaging things you could do to yourself.
You cant afford to waste years on nothing around your 30s. Men have a biological clock too and mostly pair off with women their age despite what redcopers might want to think.

That said, it seems he doesnt have his shit together. If I had a woman from another country interested in me, she could move in with me tomorrow and id be able to house and feed her indefinitely.

>>83422360
but i just dont understand how its a waste, idk. i always told him that if he ever got close to a woman irl or someone approached him irl, id understand if he left me for her. but ur right that he didnt have his shit together, i just thought wed figure it out

>>83422274
im going to but it sucks

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>>83422437
No offense but you sound like youre barely 20 if that. The fact that you think someone can in good conscience flirt around and try his luck elsewhere while they're attached to you shows how you would behave yourself.
Or perhaps youre in the bargaining stage of grief.

I want to meet up for Sunday brunch and then just walk around in my childhood neighborhood showing her graffiti my friends did. I dont want to fuck around with stochastic attachment and dumb ignoring games with someone online.
If someone online is up for it we're meeting within the month and fucking the next. And then we make solid plans. I did this shit when I was 19. Im not burning the rest of my dopamine pathways on fake relationships.

>>83422593
it absolutely does not show how i would behave myself because these are two entirely separate dynamics, i just have empathy for him as a 33 year old incel that i know he shouldnt have to sacrifice a once in a lifetime opportunity when im the one who wanted him first. ive rejected men for him and ive never thought twice about it because i know its a different case entirely. i didnt say anyone in good conscience would do it but i cared about him and i just wanted the best for him. its not like it mattered anyway because nobody did approach him and even now, i really heavily doubt he will find a girl organically irl, only if he resorts back to online. so what was even the point?

>>83420157
>>83420169
i also did this lol

this happened to me, but i was in the receiving end. a girl told me she didn't want a relationship after a year or so because "it was not possible". i think all she wanted was me to send her horny stuff and then break up, but since i never did, she got tired and gave up

>>83422643
Spinning this rationalization hamsterwheel doesnt work. I dont know you enough to tell what youre really like but the fact that you immediately started calling him incel after being threatened is pretty funny.
Calling yourself once in lifetime opportunity is rich. You think youre better than him.
Also, rejecting people in favour of some guy isnt some grand sacrifice as a female. Its what every woman that isnt gross has to do. And you'll be showered with opportunities again anyway. You never really had anything to lose.

Is this some sick perverse case of maternal instinct activating within you that made you attached to him? You do realize once you'd meet up and the air of mystique clears up youre stuck with a dysfunctional 33 year old that is most likely average looking right? Youre framing this whole thing as a charity.

Drawing a dichotomy to desperately rationalize why you wouldn't look around for something better if you were in his position is pointless.

And all of the reply is about you. How much of a saint you are and how good he has it. You clung onto the one point i made about him not having his shit together immediately and started working off of that too. Its amazing how women work. Its his fault in the end isnt it? You have a severe case of woman brain. For your sake I hope youre hot.

I love it.

>>83422763
he is an incel? the entire conversation is about him being an incel? youre the one whos framed it in your mind that being called an incel must be an insult in every instance when i met him on an incel tag on omegle. i never said what i did was grand but you claimed that i would 'act in a certain way' because of what i said and i am clarifying to you i never did such a thing and even said how i never thought twice about it (never thought of it as some noble act or thought about how it was uneven). I know he was dysfunctional and thats not an insult either before you twist words, i deeply cared about him regardless. the reply was about me because you tried to insult my character, thats it.

>Drawing a dichotomy to desperately rationalize why you wouldn't look around for something better if you were in his position is pointless.

what are you even referring to? its like you missed the complete mark of what i said, he wont find anything, the average normie man cant find anything. in your words, why would a 'dysfunctional 33 year old' ? none of this is insults, its more insulting to act like im basing someones entire worth off of their dating life. i loved him and i just cant rationalise what he left me for going off of his explanation.

im not responding to you further

>>83422805
>the average normie man cant find anything
Not that other guy but yes they can, even most "incels" can. Unless your dude was really ugly he was probably just too socially retarded.

>>83422827
okay let me correct myself, they cant find anything without effort and difficulty*

the point really still stands

>>83422805
My guy dodged a bullet.
People that love call their partner incel and highlight how selfless they are for loving them.

>>83422763
also, i know i said i wouldnt respond further. i called him being APPROACHED IRL as a once ina lifetime opportunity, not me. can you fucking read

>>83422831
Well speaking as a guy who's also a kissless virgin that dumped an e-gf, when she was trying to get me back she tried to frame it like that (worse even, like saying she was the hottest woman who'd ever give me a chance etc) but it feels silly to me. Like why would you want someone to date you on the grounds that it's "better than nothing"? I wasn't dating her just to "have a girlfriend", it's because I loved her and wanted to be with her until things didn't work out.

>>83420157
How many nudes did you send him?

>>83422872
sorry mate stacy is getting railed by him now

>>83422870
what do you think being virgin at 33 implies? you guys are foaming at the mouth wanting to paint a narrative about women all the time that you just lack complete logical consistency. youve even demonised the word incel which is a totally neutral word, just like robot. it kinda comes with being a robot

>>83422872
You got opened like a can of beans and exposed how much of a shitty person you are so fast lmao.

>>83422877
im sorry that happened to you but please dont project your experiences onto me. also, the explanation he gave to me was that he needed to stop the online stuff in order to live irl, which is the part i dont understand, if he told me he didnt like me anymore, i wouldnt even be asking or confused.

>>83422906
if thats what you believe. i live in real life and so does he. average men do not get approached irl, thats not shitty to say. you just want reasons to demonise.

>>83422896
The retroactive damage control with calling incel a neutral word and implying i cant read and you framing yourself as saint totally not being the tone is delicious

I hate women so much its unreal

>>83422931
you just said i called myself a once in a lifetime opportunity, if you can read then exercise it

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>>83422763
>You think youre better than him
OP is misandrist, of course that's her way of thinking. She hates all men, ESPECIALLY her boyfriend.

>>83422924
Well he could have also just have wanted to end it for other reasons and used that to devalue it. Not unheard of for people to hide the real reason for a breakup.

>>83422947
okay?? so would that not be justification to be confused because his reasoning doesnt align with reality? hes not a liar anyway.

I feel bad for this guy but he's seen the truth. Online is bullshit. It's all fun and games until you realize your relationship is all in your head. That said, I met a girl I started talking to on Omegle after 9 years of talking and it was the best sex I ever had. But then things got awkward when we realized we lived too far to make it work. I'm not going to uproot my entire life to live near her and it's an awful idea to just fly her here and move her in with me after one day together.

She's married now with a guy who did exactly that, flew her over and moved her in immediately. Blocked me for awhile, unblocked to tell me about how he hit her and punched a bunch of holes in the wall. Blocked me again when they made up lol.

>>83422938
>that i know he shouldnt have to sacrifice a once in a lifetime opportunity when im the one who wanted him first.

Wow you really got me. You wanting him first is the once in lifetime opportunity right? Totally what you meant when viewed in broader context like calling him incel(neutral word).

I dont understand why youre trying all these evasive maneuvers when I've obviously read you like a book in 2 replies.

Even better, you find it exhilarating. Because youre a femoid. I wish women were people and not pets you have to impose your will on

>>83422994
>>that i know he shouldnt have to sacrifice a once in a lifetime opportunity when im the one who wanted him first.

mr retard, if i was referring to myself that sentence wouldnt even make sense, ur just shit bait and im only falling for it because im sensitive about this

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Imagine how hot it would be to fuck you right now as revenge for him rejecting you and we become a happy couple while laughing about that cuck who thought online was a lie.

she's so cute getting all angry

>>83420157
I'm also 33
I didn't really add anyone over the last 10 years. Recently I added a femanon and it didn't end well.
I think after having that connection I've started craving it again and I've been trying to add people to talk to, it isn't going well so far.

Link him to this thread on Discord or whatever app you used to chat.
Let's see his point of view, if he wants to share with us and know what's exactly going on with you two.
Or at least let him know you posted here your chat with him, it's the least you can do: letting him know you posted here on /r9k/.
That's to say of course, if you care so much about him and love(d) him as you claim.

>>83423001
You cant even frame thoughts. If what you referred to was him getting approached by a random woman being the once in lifetime opportunity, that's not what the context implies.

Youre actually just retarded. Also very selfless for allowing yourself to be a cuckquean. Youre such a good person. You will allow this incel to get with other women even though you rejected others to be with him.
By the way you do realize you also have agency in the world and can make things happen on your own right? But then you'd act like a person and not a pet

>>83423041
hed find me cringe for posting about it online and opening the situation up to randoms commentary, i also literally dont have any way to contact him anymore but i wouldnt have done it anyway

>>83423045
being left for another person is not being a cuckquean. i never said id like it, i said id understand it and thats what i told him in private, do you think i was like scheming to be the better person on an imageboard when we break up? i didnt even wanna break up.

>>83423018
what happened with the femanon?

>>83422985
9 years is a crazy amount of time, did u like her romantically or was it just sexual?

>>83423087
Being perceived as shitty is the only thing that counts in your dumb mind. You need to prove to yourself that youre a good person by obtaining social proof here, you dont care about the deeper mechanisms of your mind. You just rationalize rationalize.
Thats what you do. You could be hollow inside and you'd never tell because you've never looked inwards.

Im done arguing with a philosophical zombie. You cant even grasp what im saying because youre not conscious.

>>83423145
bleh bleh bleh

>>83423087
>hed find me cringe for posting about it online and opening the situation up to randoms commentary, i also literally dont have any way to contact him anymore but i wouldnt have done it anyway
Excuses. You surely have some e-mail to contact him or something. You have to let him know.
If he came next week posting private chats he had with you, wouldn't you like to at least be informed?

>>83420157
He's 100% correct. Online isn't real.
>isnt it better than being completely alone so why would you choose to be completely alone?
No, it's actually worse because you're tricking yourself into thinking you're not alone, but at the end of the day, there is no flesh-and-blood human being in your home or in your bed. No one to greet you or hug you or make you breakfast. Listen to your "online ex" because he's wiser than you and everything he said was 100% true.

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Having an r9k gf is one of my biggest fantasies. Your ex-ebf is a fag.

>>83423178
can u stop samefagging because i will respond to every single one. i dont have his email, i actually tried to find his email again in my gallery and couldnt. yes i would be and i actually dont think it was right to post about personal drama but i AM upset and i dont have anyone to talk to about it so here we are. i dont think he said anything that he wouldnt stand by publically anyway though

>>83423214
>i actually dont think it was right to post about personal drama but i AM upset
Probably not the only red line you've crossed with him anyway.
He did dodge a bullet.
You guys surely have a way to contact each other. It's not like you'll go zero contact now, trust me. He did catch enough feelings for you. Pay attention to special dates when they come and maybe he'll be the one trying to reach you. Your birthday. His birthday. Maybe Christmas. New Year's Eve.
As butthurt as you may be, let him know of this thread and you'll be doing the right thing, at least on this. Link to your thread on desuarchive for when time comes:
>https://desuarchive.org/r9k/thread/83420157/#q83420157
Also
>samefagging
No I'm not.

How the fuck are there so many of us 33yo fags with e-gfs lmao? Should we start a club?

If you want it to work you need to meet him soon. My online relationship fell apart because I wasnt in a financial position to do so and he hesitated too long because he was looking after his grandma or some shit. Other life things happened and I just stopped caring.

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When I was that guy's age I also found myself in a fake and gay """""""e-relationship"""""" with some ho from this god awful shithole. Surprise surprise when I started trying to make concrete plans about meeting up in real life to see if there was any compatibility she started pulling away and ended up ghosting me.

>>83423374
How was it overall and why did you stop caring?

>>83423347
>Probably not the only red line you've crossed with him anyway.

nice assumption.

no he wont reach out to me, he never reaches out first to any woman he always made that very clear, im not butthurt at all, i was during the 5 week no contact but after reading that message im just very depressed about it.

>>83423374
how can you just stop caring though unless they do something maliciously or grossly inconsiderate?

>>83423407
I became homeless, met someone else I was attracted to. Its hard to compete with something right in front of you, especially as I was desperately lonely. but I did keep this guy at a distance because I didnt want to lose what I had with the internet guy. It was all a bit more complicated than that, but he started setting all these conditions of contact I had to meet or he would cut me off and he wanted to move to my country and get a place like immediately without even meeting once. I just started seeing a side I disliked when I was already going through a rough time. I went to visit my friend dying of cancer and he started accusing me of going and fucking this other dude because I didnt call him that day. I understand it was shitty for him but yeah I just stopped caring after all the threats to cut me off and delete everything. He would stage these big farewell phone calls like it would be the last. Probably just so I would cry and yeah I gave up. I feel sure things would be different now if we just actually hurried up and met

>>83423487
Just a weird set of life circumstances. Its not really that hard to forget something thats not been made real. And if you havent met them no I firmly believe its not quite real.

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>>83423473
Jeez he dodged a fucking nuke.
Anyway keep that link to your thread I gave you.
I'm so tired of having to read drama here that is one-sided. If I have to hear drama I want to hear both versions and not you telling us you're the victim and never did no wrong.
Next time you come with him and air your drama together.

>>83423649
>Anyway keep that link to your thread I gave you.
if he comes back ill give it to him

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>>83420157
That's fucked OP. From reading your replies it seems like you genuinely love him, so he has no reason to back out.
>is this how most older robots feel? do you still add women online?
I'm a 30+ year old virgin. I don't add women online, but the stuff he's saying in that message - "online isn't real" etc. makes 0 sense, he's clearly not thinking straight and failing to dig deep about the real reason he can't commit. Lovers used to court and communicate with each other over letters. It's not "pretend." How is it "pretend" if he's breaking someone's heart? That's as real as it gets.
"Age gaps" are also just a modern prudish invention, it shouldn't matter. Especially as you said earlier if he's an undeveloped NEET, it makes even more sense.
Reading that message ruined my day. I hope things get better for you.

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>>83423669
>it seems like you genuinely love him

>>83423649
never said i was the victim and did no wrong, i said that he left me for said reason that he stated. if it wasnt the real reason then he shouldve told me the real reason. this is simply about us breaking up, nothing about the relationship in its entirety. ur just bored probably

>>83420157
i feel the same, im 35 and online "relationships" are not real and a waste of time. maybe if i was 18-20 i'd be happy to talk with some schizo foid online and pretend that i have a gf but its just a delusion. its like pretending that being a neet incel is cool, its fun when youre young and your whole life is ahead of you but when youre older it becomes sad and meaningless living such a life

>>83423759
A break-up happens when your relationship, in its entirety, fails.
If what held the relationship together no longer holds it, then it breaks.
That's why we'd need both points of view to understand what the hell happened and when things went south, not just your one-sided view if you guys want to make your drama public. If you both were lovey dovey two or three months ago, but now not anymore, then something broke. And it's often a cumulative sequence of events what breaks everything.
And it's also often both partners' fault what breaks it. All in all he's gonna be better now.
You claim that it's not what you mean, but you gotta be careful with your phrasing because for some of us, as other anons have pointed out, it does sound like you're saying 'a literal neeting khhv 33 yo incel loser just dumped me', and I just tell you to be careful because even if not intentional, maybe some of this spilled into your relationship with him and eroded it to some degree.
Keep the link and maybe you'll both be here some day and at least you get some closure if that's what you need right now.

i get it. im not fucking with anybody online unless we're meeting up within a week. month max. not wasting all that time to realize i hate someone in person.

>>83420157
I'm 25 and I accidentally edated a girl (though she hated calling it that) now I am trying to do it again but I don't think anyone else is going to like me like that. My fantasy is finding someone and travelling to meet them, which would be really out of character for me.

>>83424635
I'm 35 that's a typo

>>83424107
but u guys are just assuming that? ur not assuming he did anything just specifically that i did something to cause the end of the relationship and thats really not very fair

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>>83423532
but u did go and fuck the other dude? did you swallow his cum? did he eat you out? did you do anal? did he choke you? cum inside you?

>>83420157
Not going to be original, I'm simply going to ask, just how old are you?

>>83424709
Please re-read my post. I said it's often both partners' fault.
I'm not saying he's perfect and has no fault.
But I can tell he's probably going to be better off if he cuts off most of the contact with you, even more the most intimate type of contact. It's obvious there was something in the relationship that he could bear no more, be it the 'being online' thing on top of everything or maybe something else under the surface too. Now he no longer has to go through it.
The relationship has to be good for both. If he's been avoiding you so much I don't know what the hell has been going on between you guys and it'd be pivotal to know his version of everything too but whatever it was it's obviosly been bad enough to cause the break-up. Jumping to quick conclusions like 'he doesn't like you that much' would be wrong and simplistic.
Let things calm down.

>>83420157
Ironically this situation is something I have been involved in a lot. Was not even dating but keeping company and playing pretend for them. Several girls because I just wanted to see them happy and not suffer because my life is empty and pointless and do not want it to happen to anyone else.
The hard part is always the goodbyes but it is necessary. I tend to meet people at their lowest point in life and I make it my mission to just raise their spirits and build them back up. Several of them eventually found a real girlfriend or boyfriend depending on how they swing.
But what I did, as assholish as it sounds, was found a way to make them hate me but without hurting them. That way thy would forget about me and do not ever feel sad. But some people are just way too hard to deal with, they just do not want to let you go and they know you are just trying to move away so they have a better life or something.
Anyway I am rambling at this point, I am sorry this happened to you OP, it is not fun to be on the receiving end of this all but he most likely meant it and had good intentions. Hopefully you find someone else that will spend as much time with you as you did with him.

is this thread worth reading? i might dig in

>>83420157
I'm 32 and a similar thing happened to me. e-gf was a radical feminist and lefty who would instigate arguments with me almost every night, call me a bad person and hang up on me. Then she would call me back a few minutes later, change the subject, and then be all sweet and horny for me. She said that she wanted my babies and all that, and then the last time I talked to her a little over a month ago, she went into the latest lefty hoax about Trump's association with Epstein. I told her the debunk that the right media went with, and that I don't think Trump is a pedophile, and she said that she thinks her kids wouldn't be safe around me, and that I shouldn't reproduce and then blocked me on discord and blocked my phone number. After about a week she started blowing up my phone trying to restore communications between us, but I think I'm done with all that. I don't even care that she has a difference of opinion, I just don't want to come home after work every day to an argument about politics and being told I'm evil by the girl I'm supposed to love and provide for someday.

I am still open to meeting someone online as long as we have a real plan for getting together IRL. I don't think online relationships are an illusion, but I don't think they're the same thing as a real relationship. If you don't have a plan (i.e. these things need to happen for us to be together IRL and we're both doing XYZ to make it happen and this is the timeline we're on) then I ahsolutely see where OP's exbf is coming from. You spend your time and effort on something that is very likely to not come together and become a real relationship, and in the meantime you're passing on opportunities for actually putting yourself out there and meeting someone who could be the start of a real relationship. It also reinforces phone and internet addiction, as you have to be online every day just to hear from your partner, which is something any mentally healthy person is trying to get away from.

>>83425059
what did you even say to her that made her feel so committed to you? can anyone learn this?

>>83424942
>found a way to make them hate me but without hurting them
Man have you got checked for psychopathy just in case, though?

>>83425067
I think it was just that i was her type appearance-wise, and we had some common interests and that I have my own place and she was kinda desperate to move out of her current living situation. I didn't really do anything special talking to her, because I wasn't really trying to make her my gf. It came out that she was crushing on me hard and I thought she was very cute, so I took it in that direction.

>>83425073
>psychopathy
No and there is no need. There is a fine line you have to tread to make this work. Hate is a strong word but it is not far off.

>>83420169
I tried it for a little but I did realize part way it's fake and you can't trust she's not texting other guys or actually doing stuff in person. It would hit me really hard. I'd rather stay a virgin than get in line for the sloppy cock train they have run on them. It's just miserable.

>>83425104
so have money and be attractive, got it

>>83425127
The girl was talking about moving to live under my bed and said I was special too. You can just tell when it's bullshit.

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Man, I miss my e-gf

Been trying to find a new one since the summer but can barely find any girls to talk to online, let alone any who I click with

>>83425130
I'm a 6 at best. She likes chubby guys and she likes my red hair. Also I don't have a lot of money, I bought a very cheap house when interest rates were very low and at the time I had a decent paying job and saved aggressively for it. The year I bought my house was probably the only year of my life where I could have gotten myself on the property ladder. The whole crush situation came to light because I had entertained the idea of us being roommates, because the rent money she'd be giving me would've taken off a ton of financial pressure.

>>83420157
As a fellow 33 year old virgin, I disagree with his premise that online isn't real

Sure we aren't having sex, but we're talking for hours every day and watching movies and playing games and giving each other gifts

It's not like I have much of a life outside the internet anyway, I only go outside for work and groceries

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>>83420157
you sound like you took nothing he said to heart and still feel like manipulating him

why are you like this? if you want to be with him so badly then go fucking see him and take his virginity, you cold cunt

>>83425171
>don't have a lot of money
>decent paying job
i see why she fucked with you so much

>>83425193
i was literally planning to go see him, i do not manipulate him but even if i did, i have zero way to contact him, stop projecting

>>83425220
then you clearly took too long to make it a real relationship
idk what to tell you at this point
learn from this for future relationships

>>83424947
not even slightly

>>83424934
but even if you said that, youre still being presumptuous to say that hes better off and saying that theres any reason other than what he explicitly stated himself as to why he didnt want to talk anymore. im not saying youre wrong or right but youre taking a narrative in ur head and just running with it

>>83424869
im 19

>>83425226
??? i only just got my first job 6 months ago and i was planning to see him last month, i didnt have any money and as soon as i had enough to go see him i was making plans and booking time off at work, emailiing local hotels, etc

>>83425200
I don't make as much as I made in 2017-2018, that was the best paying point in my working life.

>>83425240
ok, well, i know i have been dragging you through the mud because im bitter and jealous

>>83425238
just curious why are you with a guy so much older than you?

shouldn't you be into the guys who look like emaciated 14 year olds? lol
that's all I get from this board anyway

>>83425265
because i like him and i dont believe in age gap stuff being any issue at all when it comes to inexperienced older men

>>83425279
Where'd you meet him, just curious as a lonely nigga

>>83423111
We liked each other romantically off and on through the years. I don't know what she saw in me but it was a great day when we met. There was definitely a bit of sexual tension.

>>83425286
omegle, too bad its dead now

>>83420157
TL;DR your e-gf wants to fuck not jerk off. There's plently of lonely guys out there unless that staticians are lying to us, find another man.

You have to admit, it's pretty weird to be in a romantic relationship with no in person contact. Honestly true asexualality is extreamly rare (most just have self image issues/horrible truma) and even in healthy m/f relationships irl broadly the dude "gets used" for attention/entertainment/money and the women "get used" for sex/ego stroking. Both use eachother for company. It's not really a bad thing unless the scale gets out of whack.

>>83425243
don't count it as a win for me, seriously. I was talking to her every day for like 7 months, and I can't begin to describe how much of a relief it is to no longer dread coming home at the end of the day to face the insane emotional ranting about Trump and Elon Musk and Israel and racism in America, and how my religion is evil and misogynistic. Being single is better than that.

>>83425296
Holy shit I can't imagine meeting someone there

He lucked the fuck out, it's 90% jeet males

>>83425309
there were some tags where you could meet interesting people, very few, but some.

>>83425309
i met someone on omegle in 2010 or 2009 or some shit. but she lost interest in me after we met irl (she most likely fell in love with my facebook profile)

>>83425298
Yeah I was in one "online relationship" and that was when I was literally 15 and it was in World of Warcraft, and it lasted about a week and went as well as you imagine.

Online relationships are fucking retarded.

>online is fake
My best friend and his gf met online and didn't meet irl until like 2 years later. Now they've been dating almost 10 years and living together for like 4.

It can happen.

>>83425699
and how many guys did she fuck in the interim between them meeting and meeting up irl?

why would you even bother? just gross

>>83423111
I guess she wasn't as into me as I was into her.