When I was 19, I was at university with this indian girl. She looked my age but was actually 39, she had three children and a husband. Every day she'd come in with new elaborate outfits that were so beautiful and she was so soft, so kind and so feminine. She'd tell me about painting the lounge with her kids, about the holidays her family went on, and everything else. She was actually the perfect tradwife. I loved her.We sat together for a full year and there was massive sexual tension between us. She'd praise me and I'd praise her, and we'd hold each other's hand and talk about maybe one day working a job together. She gave me her number and sent me texts. i was deeply in love with her. It's been almost ten years since then but I still think about her every day. She was the most perfect woman I had ever met. I'm married now, I have kids, but I still think about her when I go to christmas parties. I tried my best to get her working with my mum but it didn't work out. I remember her smile, I remember going to lunch together. I have more warm memories with her than my wife but I can't admit it.I think it might've been my young age, but it left an impression on me.
I'm really drunk and have come back from a Christmas party from work but I love her so much.It was only six months but you can't believe how feminine she was. It was the perfect moment in my life and it just bulldozed me. I'm back from a party and I'm still thinking about her. It's like a fucking dream. Absolutely nothing in my life will compare to my time with her, and we didn't have sex. I remember her excitement, I remember her worries, I remember every moment.
>>83463079When I was 19 and university one of my flatmates was a midget jeet nigger mix and it was the most obnoxious, dirty, filthy, unhygienic creatureIn fact she was so dirty that her room was infested with flies which subsequently made the entire flat infested with fliesShe got kicked out eventually for how DIRTY she was
>>83463079my biggest fear is being married to a guy like you
>>83463079im still a virgin and idc about women since ive never had consensual sex with one
>>83463154What's exactly so horrible about OP?Just having some infatuation with an older woman who left a platonic impression on him?That's the worst kind of man you could marry?
>>83463154it was just my young age. I came from a shit family situation and she was my first love. I was homeless for literally two months before starting that course. I know it's bad, I know I'm horrible for feeling this way. But I was young and it was so intense and so close. It's like in that novel Lolita where he gets denied at the last minute and then ends up with a life long obsession.
>>83463195>platonic impressiondude literally writes about how much he loves her, how shes the perfect woman, that he thinks about her every day and nothing will compare to the time he had with her. Is it that crazy to not want to marry a man whose brain is occupied by another woman?
>>83463229I'm drunk and exaggerating, it's not every day. But every time I get really drunk like this I think about her. That was the best memory of my life, having leftovers from the cafeteria and sofa on a Saturday when nobody was around.What the fuck do you do though? She's long gone, she's in her 50s now easily? Admit it to someone? Why? It was stupid dumb fun, she was smart enough to know it was too and kept some distance.
>>83463229She was his "first love" in a way. I don't think it's a horrible thing that she occupies a special place in his thoughts. Sorry but I think your femcel insecurity levels are reaching a point where it won't be healthy for you to have a relationship if you fear this way.
>>83463276baseless insult throwing lmaoI didn't say it wasn't okay for his first love to hold a special place. The way he worded it and described it seemed really shitty. Your wife should be your biggest love, else why marry her? I dont believe in marrying just whoever is available to me. Reminiscing about good times is fine, it becomes a problem when it occupies your brain to a point where it negatively influences your current relationship. With the added context of OP saying its exaggerated, its whatever, again given it doesnt actually impact his marriage.
>>83463079>indian women try hard to look black>black women try hard to look white>white women try hard to look black>hispanic women try hard to look whiteWhat the fuck is going on, bros?
>>83463318Then you'd better let your (future) husband to mind his wording if he happens to have a first love before you or anything, because you'd start resenting him over that. And that's what actually can negatively impact the relationship if your insecurity feels like too much to handle.>baseless insult throwing lmaoAlso excuse me, not meaning to say anything insulting to you.
>>83463365It depends on the reasoning and the type of feelings related. It's totally understandable for someone to feel deep gratefulness and appreciation for his first love and what she has done/been for him in a very dark time of his life. It's totally understandable if for example one of his girlfriends died during their relationship and he grieves that. I'd just rather not feel like someone he settled for because he couldn't have what he actually wanted and might end up resenting me for that, which is what I couldve imagined for OP based on his first two posts. Anything other than that, I dont wanna hear how amazing your exes or crushes were and that theyre the perfect woman. The perfect woman should be your wife. Now excuse my intrusion as a foid in a thread that was probably clearly meant for the boys to read cause women wouldn't like to hear this shit lol
>>83463423>It depends on the reasoning and the type of feelings related. It's totally understandable for someone to feel deep gratefulness and appreciation for his first love and what she has done/been for him in a very dark time of his life. It's totally understandable if for example one of his girlfriends died during their relationship and he grieves that.Agreed, for the most part.>Anything other than that, I dont wanna hear how amazing your exes or crushes were and that theyre the perfect woman. The perfect woman should be your wife.People are a bit more complex than that, I guess. The perfect person doesn't exist anyways, and it's not ok to demand absolute perfection from either partner in a relationship.You must have standards and redlines, that's for sure. Just realize that maybe some could be stemming from insecurities that go against you.
>>83463423I don't have any first loves. I'm pure.
