I started sleeping to avoid my family, on the average i wake up at 1-2 am and go to sleep around 12am 1pm, i sleep 14-15 hours, i eat half a meal a day, when i feel like eating, lost interest in everything, i never considered suicide, rather i'd think about running away and live like a vagrant, this world makes little to no sense for me, i have no interest in being just another gear, i've never been able to explain myself, and why i feel this way, plus, nobody ever cared about asking, they jist give you hubrisful advices, that may have worked for them, but for me is just cacophony, at some point i hated my therapist too, never met such an arrogant, yet concealed and calm person, pretending to understand what's up with me, just because i told her she got it right when she said i'm very angry, she started developing a theory about sex, and how it could be one of the pillars of my problems. I never had the courage to say to people i think are in the wrong, that they are in the wrong. This goes way back to the infinite arguments i had with my mother, never met such a dense and obtuse person like her, and yet i'm the one wrongful in those arguments, because i end up being vulgar due to not tolerating her ways enough, and being talkatibe enough to make my thoughts clear and understandable, im just very tired guise
