I saw a comment online (not 4chan) from a teacher saying they call on quiet students to let them know that they (teacher) cares about what they have to say. The teacher then says they were a quiet kid in school too.But this got me thinking: when I was in school, I was painfully shy too (from grades 5-12, or Y6-Y13), but I dreaded being called on. I had severe social anxiety that bordered on selective mutism though. I'd imagine a lot of quiet kids have anxiety, depression, autism, or something else that makes them not want to speak, so they wouldn't actually appreciate being called on.Any formally quiet kids bots here? What is your take on this? Why were you shy, and would you have appreciated someone calling on you? In high school I didn't even want friends, and in senior year I cut myself with a pencil because I kept being called on (small class). Where did you end up in life? I became a recluse.
>>83468866theres levels to it. tons of normies call themselves antisocial when in actuality they're just introverted.
>>83468877Dubs of truth. But they said they had crippling depression, that isn't normie per se, but I think in their case they were lonely and wanted the connection (not scared of it) and just didn't have the energy to reach out. I had depression too but that wasn't why I was quiet.
>>83468866Idk, I was always just there in the back of the class. Ironically, it was always the black girls that would go to the guidance counselor for some reason. Not even because they misbehaved. I mean, they did act retarded, but the guidance counselor herself was a black woman lol. Not to sound bitter or anything, I don't care, but it was always the black women that were mean to me lol (not the students, the adults). Although, I was somehow never bullied. I guess everyone took the quiet kid meme seriously, I'd get random compliments out of nowhere for like no reason. I was painfully meek and shy, so I don't understand what was with them. Some girl told me that she thinks I'll become the next Bill Gates, because I'm a nerd who only focuses on class, but I ended up as a loser working a job in a garage so there's that. Idk what I have, maybe a bit of autism or something. But my excuse internally was that I already had a friend that I hang out mostly online. We lived near but as we got older into highschool, we'd moreso play video games together online. It was going well, I became very codependent, but he ended up killing himself in 10th grade so I ended up alone without any social skills, nor the ambition to attain any others.I was le gifted, I deserved everything
>>83469007My only bullies were black so I get what you're saying. I didn't really see a lot of black adults in my school, they don't usually tend to become teachers. Along with social anxiety I also have autism and ADHD but I was social before I developed anxiety so that's not why I was quiet. I'm really sorry about your friend.
>>83468866>>83469007Theres a lot to unpack in you guys posts so I'll just say I had very similar experiences. I just wonder why no one ever tried to help us. Surely the teachers were trained to see these signs like OP said. Why didn't they send us to get help from someone? Idk maybe they did for you guys but they never did for me. I feel like I fell through the cracks without anyone noticing and now my life is fucked because of it. I can barely go to the mailbox nowadays without getting extremely nervous. I'll probably be homeless once my parents die and of course social anxiety generally isn't enough to get neetbux so I'm gonna starve too.
>>83469030>didn't really see a lot of black adults in my school, they don't usually tend to become teachers.They weren't ever teachers. They were just ordinary staff like a nurse or a guidance counselor as I said before. I mean, there was one teacher that was for health, but she never teached anyone. She just had everyone pick up a textbook and rewrite the details into a notebook. They were usually mean though. Back in middle school, I was also more social, kind of normie even. (Although I don't like thinking myself as a failed normie. I still always felt different, a big reason I got attached to my old friend. He was also weird and normie, he later became a chud too, although I was a meek love for everyone kind of guy. I still can't believe I supported BLM)Anyways, I had my muscle torn in my knee, so I had to use crutches. One day, I wanted to figure out when my parents were supposed to pick me up, and so my teacher sent me to the nurse's office to call them. I went there but for some reason she was very stubborn about it. She argued with me and after a minute, I left seething. On the way back, I purposely let go of my crutches so I'd fall down and had an excuse to return back to the nurse. A teacher saw me (also black, I don't know why there was so many black people there) and he asked if I needed help. I said no and I got up and walked back to the nurse. The nurse didn't believe that I fell and we argued for like a minute or two until she finally let go and let me call my parents. I finally ended up going back to class and I was still seething. >I'm really sorry about your friend.It's okay, it's been years now so I'm over it.
>>83469065>Why didn't they send us to get help from someone?>I feel like I fell through the cracks without anyone noticing and now my life is fucked because of it.Definitely same here, I'm >>83469007I don't like blaming others for my troubles, but they definitely could have helped. Back in middle school, I definitely got very quiet but I didn't care. I only noticed how they would only help the black girls for some reason, I'm still unsure why. I wasn't even racist or anything, it was just such an obvious thing. It gets worse in highschool. I was still the very quiet kid, and instead of a dumb public school, it was a slavic charter school (which I am), although it was for anyone. I STILL noticed the same pattern with the black girls, literally wtf??? Anyways, I got to 10th grade and the suicide of my only friend happened and it COMPLETELY destroyed me, I was 15. I was the smart kid beforehand, so much that my history teacher commented on what I was doing so different since I was above everyone else. I had honors class, and even classes above my grade. However, since my friends passing, I got very depressed. I stopped doing work, my grades went to F, and the teachers just ignored it, even when I did try to get help, for school, they didn't care. I'd even cry in the back of the class (as much as I tried to keep it secret) and no one still budged. The last straw was when I was sitting in front of the class for something science, and I was keeping my head down, crying over my friend. The teacher (who was also a black woman lol) repeatedly told me to get my head up. I tried to show just enough to her that I was crying, and I didn't want any attention, but she still repeated herself. It was like 4 times and I was seconds away from storming the class, the other students were staring at me, probably saw me crying, before she finally gave up and continued her teaching.
>>83469177After that, I stopped showing up to school despite my parents 'discipline' and I didn't go back for like 2 months, still no one cared even though they kept track of the attendance so they knew I stopped showing up suddenly.Sorry for my long blog lol
>>83469065They just got pissed off that I didn't do work. I was even diagnosed with autism, ADHD, anxiety, and depression at the time. They just nagged me and gave me detentions for not doing work. I understand why, but at the same time they clearly didn't care about my struggles at all.>>83469087I meant in general I didn't see Black people in schools. I had a fourth grade teacher who was Black and I liked her, and I think in middle school we had a sub who was Black. He was chill. Where are you from? Chicago?
>>83469196>Where are you from? Chicago?I don't know if this is too specific, since I already said a school, but Florida. My parents came here from Ukraine and I have literally no idea what they were thinking. I guess it would have been worse if they stayed in Ukraine because of the war, but here??? I'd take ohio over this, it's not even a good part of florida
This is fucking stupid and I experienced it from a teacher in high school. I still have major social anxiety and sometimes still stutter because of it (not so much now, but still do.) Thr teacher called on me so I would "get out my shell." Guess what happened? I stuttered. The result, I got bullied a lot. Not just mentally but physically as well. Imagine being punched several times and told "hey, my punches are stuttering, just like anon studders!" It resulted in major ptsd that I spent years in therapy over and still have symptoms that I take several meds for.Fuck that teacher. I hope that teacher gets a follow-up with someone like me. I saw my old teacher who saw me and said hello, and if I finally "got out of my shell?" I held up my bag of medications, including the xanax and prazosin I just picked up and explained this is because her doing that resulted in me being bullied, and I hope she feels guilty over it because now I don't trust anyone.Thankfully, I got a job where socialization is minimal and easy. I still get panic attacks, but my psych switched me to klonopin for when I have a major episode which stuff like mindful awareness and grounding are not working. I sometimes disassociate. The thing thst pisses me off the most is that all my bullies are doing great. They have really nice homes, jobs, and families. So much for "you'll be their boss one day." I fucking hate people.
>>83468866That title is something an extrovert would say
>>83468866>was a very outspoken extrovert growing up>got bitch-slapped by the 'real world' immediately after finishing high school>gut-punch after gut-punch, from getting kicked out of the military twice to being outcast by my "family">finally reach some stability, get to university>realize just how 'different' I am from the other students (not just because of my age)>introversion hits hard after getting a job at a warehouse full of extroverted Boomers, Gen-X'ers, and Millennials (almost entirely black)>hated by nearly everyone at the job for BEING quiet, but so damn good at it that I've yet to be fired or even written upIt's been a journey. I know better now.
>>83468866being emotionally neglected and just generally unappreciated taught me at a very young age that nobody cares about anything I like or say so I learned to shut the fuck up and retreat into my own head
>so do you support the party that is lead by a literal child rapist child killer?no?>so you must support the side that lets a child rapist, child killer get away with being a world leader?uh no?what is the party, ideology, main support, whatever of "not a child rapist". im really not sure
>>83469600thank god. you just pay your taxes and we can just use the money as we see fit, we dont have to worry about you like, doing anything at all, about it. thanks for being the literal, THE LITERAL, perfect subject. keep being you!
>>83469464>i am so incredibly good at a warehouse job, so much better the people applyingwow
>>83469007>But my excuse internally was that I already had a friend that I hang out mostly onlineI second this, but it was 2 friends I had in my classes. Even then, I didn't say much, usually just sat aside while they spoke.>>83468866I actually found this to be quite a remedy, though I do think there are ways to ask questions to students without humiliating them if they get the wrong answer. For me, it helped me a lot when I knew that at least the teacher noticed me. I don't think I wanted it for any other reason than as a reminder that my presence was acknowledged. >Why were you shy[?]I think it was a fundamental lack of relatability to the things that most people were participating in. Elementary school was fine near the end of it (8th grade). But by HS, most of my classmates were starting to get into weird, petty drama and gossip over relationships, substances, yadda, yadda. I think I just thought it was all really stupid and something that I knew wouldn't be good for me -- and really, I was right in the end. But yes, it left me quite shut-in throughout those years. Coping with it now, being in uni, I find it a matter of situating myself and my beliefs inside the circle how ever I can, rather than looking for a different circle to participate in. Doesn't help that I don't live in a too-big city, my options for circles are quite limited. Jibber-jabber aside, I was really just quite shy and insecure about myself. 300lbs by grade 11, unconventional tastes in everything, and harsh moral judgement of everything that forbade me from just going with the rhythm.>Where did you end up in life?I'm doing pretty good now. Lost weight, take better care of my appearance (not much, but still), and realised I'm usually more interesting to normies than I think I am. I think I have about 10 irl friends I can call on whenever to chat with, which I think is pretty good.
>>83468866I grew up in a very matriarchal family and I was the only boy and the baby of the family. Getting bossed around and told what to do by girls/women all day did something to my psyche. I was treated as the favorite by my mom but jealousy through the rest of my sisters and the like. It was a love/hate relationship honestly being treated as the family slave by them but being coddled by mom. Idk my feelings were a mess. My mind was a mess trying to figure things out during elementary and middle school. I was told to express my feelings and if a girl is picking on me then it means she likes me. Right? Very wrong. The girls picked on me a lot and was bullied by them constantly. It made me shy and intimidating by them. Since my schools were more girls than boys it just made going to school nerve wrecking being around them. I mostly kept to myself and the bullying ended when I finally moved toward the end of high school. I grew out out being mostly afraid of girls but sometimes when I run out to do errands and I see a pack of girls I cant help but feel intimated and need to avoid them. Its not that I hate them I guess just my fight or flight kicks in and I want to run away. The girl I liked a long time ago bullied me into marrying her. sorry for the blog I was just trying to paint a picture of things. I am going to sleep and I will check on this in a few.
>>83468866In school, I was the most chatty, extroverted kid there was. My dad heard I talked too much at one point, then flipped the fuck out and threatened and screamed at me.Any time I had a personality poke through any meaningful way, I found stripped and ripped apart till I was left a bit of a husk of a child.I'm just now realizing I'm not an introvert, I'm just afraid of people because my parents were evil people.
>>83470440>I spend my days whining on the internet.>That'll show those taxcattle and their jewish masters!
>>83471120Jfl preabuse pill
>>83471120Same, my dad would always scream in my face or threaten to hurt me (he probably couldn't have really because he was disabled but he knew I didn't know that) whenever I would show any happiness or personality. He thought that I'd "learn to make friends at school" but that was impossible because I was always so drained from his daily screaming tantrums. Obviously I grew up to be a weirdo but he claims he just can't understand what went wrong. I feel you anon, I hope your faggot dad is having the Christmas he deserves this year...I know mine is.
>>83468866I spent my school years trying to blend in and be invisible so I wouldn't specifically get singled out for shit like thisI was a weird case though, because I only get quiet when I'm in a class with no friends. In a class with friends, I become disruptive lmao
>>83468866That's one thing to think about. Here's another: https://youtube.com/shorts/ruruzi64aek?si=IXi7OCcIGJIuK5q6
>>83468866I always corrected people. Once I got told to shut up. I did. I was completely alone for 8 years after that. My lack of social skills is only my doing.
>>83468866I had a teacher in 8th grade that took special interest in me and made me feel seen, I'd go so far as to say that she felt like a second mom to me, and I still think about her to this day despite being in my early 30s.
