who here reached total dissolution of your cultural behavioral patterns?I'm talking about not partaking in cultural celebrations, questioning every social interaction and family you have, questioning everything and quitting caring about anythingand no not in teenage existential dread, but just freeing yourself from everything and stop operating with the same ingrained patterns and stopping and ending all relationships that don't serve you and stop doing everything that you don't care aboutdoes that make sense or no?
>>83505684I used to do that, but nowadays I'm too broken to not go with the path of least resistance.
>>83505684I understand you, Nietzsche.
>>83505684I can't let go of Christianity. I can't help but feel the world is controlled by demons. Not only politically but every aspect of life.
>>83505684It does, but it also skips over the why completely and assumes that all cultural rites are pointless and arbitrary.Birthdays, dress codes, celebrations, customs, they all arose for a reason and they persisted for another reason as well, that is, to serve a sense of social harmony. If you simply discard of them without taking into account that, you're flipping to the other side of the same coin, instead of arbitrarily partaking in customs because "it's just how it should be", you don't partake on them because "it's not what it should be".I think the healthiest point of view, if you want liberation from culture is to understand what it supports in others lives, and to strategically partake in it. Say, to attend your mother's birthday, to dress well at formal events, and to overall use that knowledge not to alienate yourself from society but to selectively engage with it so that you can preserve both freedom and congruence with the people around you.
>>83505713>but nowadays I'm too broken to not go with the path of least resistance.not really what I mean and this will be hell anywayidk>>83505725maybe? idk>>83506893another disillusioned copeyou have way more cope than what I am trying to describe here>>83507104too late, the facade has fallenalmost all interactions and everything became fake and hollowtotal absolution from everything, now it's just pure nihilistic and anxiety dailyI'm tired
>>83505684yep thats basically me entire life now, i exist as a singularity
>>83507693>>83505684yea that's how i operate too except i'm that person who also gets women so i'm going through the retarded motions with them too like i do with my current girlfriend who i've been with for a few months. hilariously she's already sensed that's how i operate but is fine with it and continues with her same patterns. since she's pretty open to how i am i return the favor and feed into her patterns here and there and then completely drop out of the conversation mentally. sometimes i feel bad for doing it but most times i don't
>>83507693>>83507711>having energy to entertain and acquire womenevery value metric has totally collapsed I don't care about anything except sustaining my own life and easing my mental pain of constant anxietyno energy to entertain relationships and when no libido even less desire for womenI just exist to exist I wouldn't even say it's depression just anxietyI've been way more depressed now I just exist
>>83505684also what you're talking about is simplified to a single word called conditioning. in buddhism, the unfolding of all events that don't serve the truth (aka leaving samsara) is just conditioning. so it's not even a weird thing or anything like that. it's an extremely real thing and it's how the entire planet of people operates. everyone including you and i are still operating within our conditioning and attachment to various parts of the bullshit that is samsara
>>83505684Everyone goes through their edgelord phase but eventually you loop back around because you realize those cultural behavior patterns are all you have to keep you sane in an otherwise chaotic and meaningless world.
>>83507761no we call people like you who return back to the shitfest pussies
>>83507104this sort of analysis misses that some things ARE practical. hats protect your head from the sun, for example, as well as from falling objects. most people dont know this, but bowler hats like picrel were actually the original hard hat for working men -- theyre quite tough. birthdays serve an educational purpose for children, acquainting them with their relations and helping them to self-actualize at early ages. (its the first thing for a kid thats all about "YOU" and involves a bunch of people looking at you and asking you things. this helps kids move past the "infant observer" state where they dont have much purposeful interaction with adults and are just "cared for" without being asked.the point is that cultural things like hats and birthdays often do serve a practical purpose, or once did at least. theyre not just "random." another example is the fall and winter feasting holidays -- these serve as guideposts for people, encouraging them to store food for the coming winter, and encouraging an accounting of stores to see what surplus can be feasted on. they also serve as "community check-ins" where it can be seen whether everyone is doing ok and has enough food. you have to think about traditions in an older context, and then its easy to see why they make sense. just because a lot of the usefulness is gone in current year doesnt mean the ideas were "arbitrary" to begin with.
>>83507794>but bowler hats like picrelstopped reading there. i don't consider the thoughts of someone who can't into picrel
>>83507678>another disillusioned copeIt's more like schizophrenia due to living in an unnatural environment. Or low IQ+paranoia. I'm rationally an atheist but my instincts get me to believe in the demonic lol.
>>83507956you ought to read more old things, especially elizabethan through victorian. the english mystic tradition has largely been papered over by clueless modern types, but donne, shakespeare and spenser are full of prophecy and prediction. for example, john donne wrote in the early 1600s, before even the pilgrims: "O my America, my new-found land, safeliest when with one man manned,my mine of jewels, my emperie;to enter in these bonds, is to be free..."the founding fathers were fully aware of english prophecies of this nature, but you dont learn about them in school at all...then there is the "school of night" idea -- picrel is an illustration. in the english mystic tradition there are many inklings that something must have existed before god -- a void, a blankness -- a medium into which the word was spoken. this idea is always danced around, rather than spoken explicitly, because it was heresy, and would get you burned or jailed until the modern era. it was called atheism, even though it isnt exactly, and up to the mid 1900s could still get you fired from teaching. also, if you want to consider how god would be scientifically possible, consider boltzmann beains. quantum physics is perfectly compatible with a being that would seem like a "higher power" to human observers. (in fact, the odd conclusion is that you are more or less infinitely more likely to be a "dreaming god" spawned in a void than to be born a real human.)
>>83508312*boltzmann brains, not beans...although one could LOOK just like a bean...
>>83507744not sure I can agree because I don't fully understand the pointtoo long to unpack that>>83507761don't think I'm returning back no I am just forced to exist in society as I'm pushing forty at this pointI try to cope, it's mostly constant nihilism since the initial brutal acute depression and stress was long before thissome times I can forget a brief period but stress and problems ramp up and an overactive mind is killing>>83507794nta but>"infant observer" stategot me feeling like adult observer state>just because a lot of the usefulness is gone in current year doesnt mean the ideas were "arbitrary" to begin with.living in one of the most individualistic countries with complete detachment from family, country and people due influx of random people only makes sense to literally stop caring about everything at all>>83507956>I'm rationally an atheistit would be more rational to be agnostic but it's all kind of pointless to our reality regardless
>>83508332if you wear a bowler hat your head will still be protected though. if you light a candle for your birthday you will remember that you are a person. i dont know if youre looking for deep meeeaning though or just like how to feel pretty good most of the time cause the second isnt that complicated but the first would be a different subject.
>>83505713It's strange. I've become like OP because I am so broken, I don't choose to do what OP described consciously, but due to my personal lack of socialization and lack of care I've begun to see almost every interaction as objectively as anyone who isn't under the influence of an ego-shattering drug could.
>>83508713Well having to cope with non stop anxiety while being forced to interact with society every day is a up and down sort of thing>>83508827It's not even due to lack of socialization from me just disappointment and let downs and borderline betrayal that just made me disappointed and tired beyond all beliefAnd hypocrisy and fakeness in everything it's killing meSocializing after the fact does not help this either still feel the absolute same I literally don't care anymore
