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>be me
>hate plankton
>not the cartoon one the real ones
>wake up scroll phone see post about saving the ocean
>mentions plankton are important
>immediately annoyed
>how are microscopic dots running the planet
>google plankton
>learn they produce oxygen
>hate them more
>why are invisible specs doing more than me
>read plankton are base of food chain
>so everything depends on them
>of course it does
>go outside breathe air
>realize plankton involved somehow
>feel watched
>drink water
>remember plankton live in water
>disgusted
>imagine trillions of plankton celebrating my hydration
>decide this is unacceptable
>check forum post titled plankton appreciation thread
>lose faith in humanity
>type long reply about how plankton are freeloaders
>get downvoted instantly
>someone replies touch grass
>grass probably benefits from plankton
>hate grass now too
>try to explain plankton are smug
>no one agrees
>feel gaslit by science
>watch documentary
>plankton glowing beautifully at night
>they look arrogant
>turn it off
>lie in bed staring at ceiling
>ceiling fan probably moved by oxygen
>oxygen made by plankton
>cant escape
>decide plankton are behind everything
>set alarm to wake up early and fight back
>wake up late
>plankton win again