I just want to live my childhood over again. I know now how foolish it was to spend all my time playing videogames and isolating myself instead of putting myself out there. So many missed opportunities. I had girls who were interested in me but I was far too nervous to do anything about it. I had people who talked to me and tried to be my friend but I didn't know how to communicate, I was too immersed in internal fantasies and spent too much of my time thinking about vidya and youtubers to put the effort into pursuing new friendships. I was the black sheep of my friend group and they would sometimes do shit without me. My parents shouldn't have allowed me to fuck myself over like I did, they should have pushed me harder to be social. My dad literally bought me my first game console for my 5th birthday. I have no happy memories from playing videogames, my only happy memories are from the little socialisation I did get. Only real life matters, not virtual shit. I just wish I could go back and try again.
>>83674441nothing matters though
>>83674441wish I socialized more but I do have happy memories with games
>>83674441i kept telling myself that i would rather wait until i am old enough to have sex and do drugs to bother socialising and then i realised i had no idea how anything worked and the time just passed by while i did nothing
