I am not an incel. I have had sex. I dont now though. I dont have a girlfriend and I dont want one unless I think I can actually fall in love. I want the idea of love I was sold when I was young even if its illusory. That you can love someone until one or both of you die. I thought I had found that and I was wrong more than once now and I regret having sex with them because of that. Any ugly fuck can do his hair and fuck some worthless fat slut if he wants. I dont. I dont want to hook up with people I barely know. I want to meet a girl and actually like her and that is harder and harder in a world that empowers and endlessly validates them for doing the opposite. To ruin themselves for someone who would love them if they didnt randomly sleep with and date retards they dont care about. My heart is cold and I doubt it will be possible to find such a thing but I would rather die alone and bitter than drown my sorrows with stranger adjacent mortally compromised losers too heartbroken to even entertain the idea that humans are capable of love beyond selecting fuck buddies as hypergamously as you can until you become bored and then settling for whoever will take you after that. If that makes me normie trash unable to comprehend or cope with the truth then fine. I will hold out until I die for true love and I would gladly rather die on this hill than be settled for settle myself or die without trying. I would rather die holding out hope for love in a world that has made it impossible than accept that it already has and destroy any chance of proving myself wrong.
