I've internalized the feeling of helplessness. I always feel paralyzed and "watched". I will never perform an action. I will keep my breath shallow. I will remain still and not declare my own will. There is no will. I'm in a dissociate haze and my experience is barely human.
My helicopter parents have fucked me up beyond repair. It's why I don't feel bad about living with them as I approach 40. They created the circumstances that produced a fucking loser.
>>84018353it's pretty interesting how even when you say that you have/had overbearing parents the experience you actually had can be widely different who too will say that they had overbearing parents. mine wanted a perfect son with being very specific how that perfect son should be and behave, the 'love' and attention was tied to that. in the end that turned me incredibly insecure and no matter what achievement i get it never feels like anything since at some point their voice you'll never be enough and you're a failure turned into my inner voice who says exactly the same thing. >I always feel paralyzed and "watched".tho in the end it just resulted in that
>>84018353>>84018370Unfortunately I feel you both. Even now they judge stupid shit and pass stupid comments and wonder why I'm an anxious nervous wreck that can't communicate with normal people. I can't even find a normal relationship anymore because all the women I end up attracting are also broken shells of human beings, and while I sort of like that, they never truly have the capacity to care about you or stick around. It's never been more over
