I don't really know where to start. I'm a guy, 19 on the cusp of turning 20 soon. My whole life I've always felt lonely. I don't think I've ever had any real friends, I've had people I liked, I talked to, hung out with, but I always felt alone despite this. I never felt like I connected with them. My whole life I've felt so aimless. Never worked a job. I'm a psychology major but I don't really know what my future plans are. I don't go out much, at all really, because driving frightens me. Romantically I haven't had much luck, I've been on maybe three dates, each time with a different woman, on the first I got cold feet and never followed up with her, on the second she said I wasn't what she was looking for, on the third she ghosted me after saying she'd like to go out again. I've been told I'm not ugly, but my looks are still something that cause me self-consciousness. I've never felt desirable. Sometimes I'll read books or see movies where the protagonist is described as being a loser and they always end up having more vibrant social lives than me and it makes me wonder if in the eyes of society, if that's a loser, then is someone like me better off dead? I know that my shortcomings are all my own fault, even if I have many grievances and anxieties about the way society is heading. I get this overwhelming feeling that everything is slowly falling apart and my generation is suffering through what is arguably the most shallow, commodified, and empty existence in recent history. The thing that makes me especially sad is knowing that none of what I think or feel is unique in any way, I feel a sort of existential impotence. Ultimately it's mostly my own fault. As I approach 20 I wonder if things will get better? I feel myself withering away, my body losing its shape, my hair beginning to thin. I think about retreating completely from society often. Am I a bad person?
>>84021813I know it dosent help but, you're not alone. I'm pretty sure that at least 70% of people on this site are in a similar spot.You'll get used to it, I'm nearly 21 and I'm happy. I'm a lazy bum tho, don't even have my drivers license yet... kinda lost in life I really don't know what to do.
Existential crisis at 19 wow emo much? Just suck it up and continue being a cog in the system and don't think about it you're not some badass action movie hero your life will be longer than a 2 hour plot so make it better.
>>84021838Whats brought you happiness?
>>84021813Fuck friends fuck dating fuck familySocializing is a waste of time and society is collapsing soon anywayJust focus on getting money and having fun21 year old btw
>>84021963You are mixing up macro scale soon with micro scale one.That soon(TM) might be a hundred years or more.
>>84021813you are a bad person in the sense that you are giving up. you dont want a job but you know you need one. your body is losing its shape because you are not being active or eating healthily. not everything is your fault, you cant control your genetics, or who or where you grew up around, or the shitty dating world of hoeflation we live in, but you can control some things but by the sounds of it you would rather let go.i felt kinda like you did when i had just turned 20, but i had been on less dates. i was a virgin. im not much older now, i am 23, but i decided to make changes in my life. sure, the changes were kind of out there and i was very lucky too, but, i refused to just give up and even though it took a long time i had some life experiences which made it worth it.you shouldnt give up or feel like you are bad because you feel like a loser. and being a loser and not getting girls doesnt make you a bad person. if you were a bad person, girls would like that and fuck you. if incels were as evil as women claim they are, women would love them the same way they love violent chads and pirates and warewolves and all this.being a loser in the eyes of women means jack shit, women are the biggest losers in life, they wouldnt be able to get anywhere if it wasnt for their sex appeal and horny or simpy men.
>>84022045>but i decided to make changes in my lifeWhat kind of steps did you take? How have things improved for you?
>>84022104i dropped out of uni and went to ukraine for 3 months. i then did a course to get into a better uni, and now am in that better uni, not that im gonna know if it matters or not.but the going to ukraine was the main part. i had to learn how to be independent and to live as an adult, i entered work, i eventually ended up living with some soldiers who taught me disciplin (idk how to spell), and it was easier to meet girls there cus it is. i got a gf but we broke up. the entire ukraine saga gave me a lot of confidence for many things in many ways. i had to kind of live in the real world there as an adult around other adults. here in the uk i am coddled even in uni and everyone else here is still a teenager mentally. over there having that mentality wont get you very far, i was forced to grow up. i went back to ukraine for another 9 months, and had a lot of experiences over there, ranging from sex to getting almost killed by a fugitive to acting for youtube to being used as advertisement for english lessons to learning how to box with a sniper dude to a catnapping.so if u feel sad and lonely in ur current situation, u can always drastically change your life. and similar to you, i first went to ukraine because i wanted to drop out of society and i wanted to be isolated from the world but i found the opposite. travel! dont give up anon!
>>84022184This is absolutely fascinating, why Ukraine specifically? You should seriously consider making a blog or something chronicling your time there, this is some crazy stuff.
