I feel that if I loose my virginity I will become sad and loose my joy...I am nice, good and kind but having sex feels mean, and it would change me as a person.I would be more confident, assured and firm, but i love being a kid and joyous.I am not ready to be a man and adult.Also I get scared when girls look at me in the eyes and smile, or when they are waiting for me to so something.Advice or tips?20 btw, 21 soon never held hands...
Joy is stored in the balls.
>I am not ready to be a manFine. Waste your 20s gooning to anime or something instead of talking to women and having sex. That's what I did and now all I think about is killing myself every day. I'll be 29 this year. No friends no gf no sex. Still mentally a child really
>>84161820Why would you lose joy and kindness as a "man"? There's not a script we're following, no directions. Just do you. Individualism is better than following the crowd.
>>84161828:( i doubt it but also how can people let other touch them its scarykinda like when a barber has a razor on your throat but people still do it
>>84161849>Individualism is better than following the crowd.NO IT ISNT DONT FALL FOR THIS OP BEING ALONE FUCKING SUCKSBeing obsessed with your individuality is for teenagers. I never grew out of it and it ruined my life
>>84161848its true that i dont do much apart from college..i know i will regret but i cant bring myself to as soon as i get anywhere close i just run away.I already regret not getting a gf in hs, and as a teen so for sure i will regret it later but is it worth it there is no going backwhat if i become just a normal person and ill never experience life like now
>>84161820You seem like an asexual bug person
>>84161849because adults are more serious and methodical and stand straighter and laugh less and live less in the moment and live in routine and are more viscioussex will turn me like that because i have to "impale" someone and be open with them and let them control me thats something you loose forever
>>84161820when you lose your virginity you feel the exact same afterwards
>>84161862yes i hate being alone, i love being with friends and family if i were alone i would die within a monthwhats the point if we are not individual do i loose consciousness and die mentally?
>>84161877no i am not its just that i get scared and chicken out last second. i get horny when seeing hot hitls and fantasizei was at this girls place she was into me for 2 weeks and I knew. It was 4 am after a party and then i get scared so i turn on the tv and then pretend its the most interesting thing of all time for 2h and dont look at her once until i leave.i tense up and get scared at the last second every time
>>84161884thats what people say but there is no way its true.its such a novel thing there is no way it doesnt affect you.however now that i think about it mby i did gaslight myself into believing this idea of joy or whatever because im too much of a bitch to have sexbut no actually it does change you, thats why historically you become a man after sex because we all agree something changes
>>84161862I'm not saying be alone, I was meaning more about the attitude he was talking about. He could become a fun loving man, they exist.>>84161882Don't have sex then.
>>84161920its all ive thought about for 9 years and i cant see me accepting notbut ur right i am just whining. either i do or i don't, should make a decision and stick with it and move on
>>84161868>no going back...to what? whatever ur afraid of losing, its probably just vague nonsense or not particularly valuable. >>84161890That's all a good thing. You want to get yourself away from pretentious ideas and stay grounded in reality. Reality is with other people.>>84161902That's fine. It's fine to be scared. If a girl is into you then you're already like 90% of the way there. You'll get more opportunities, dont pussy out next time. Be excited rather than scared.
>>84161918I felt the exact same way afterwards, I was 16, went to school the next day like literally nothing happened
"Do i really want to have sex? What if it changes me in some abstract way or something?"Whenever your brain is saying this to you it is almost certainly just coping and seething because its scared. Focus your energy and attention to talking to the girl and not saying or doing anything too autistic. You can get away with being inexperienced and awkward, especially if she already likes you.
>>84161932thanks for the adviceit might be nonsense but uhh i think about how most of my life has been thinking about it, if i do it then what... i have nothing to do. also im not a kid anymore and people always wish they were a kid again filled with awe and wonder not understanding much. mby sex is a trap and your soul and sense of self dies but other people can't notice.yes reality is sharing stuff with people i love talking to people it makes me happyi cant not pussy out, unironically i think i will shake vomit and cry. i dont know to kiss and move and i hate when people know im not good at anything, also its embarrassing considering my age.I guess something I forgot to mention is that 50% of the fear is also the fact that I'm afraid that people will know. like im a 8 year old who gets angry and defensive when you tell him he has a crush and hides it
>>84161963>>84161918right, forgot to mention, I'm not a dude
>>84161963hmmmwas something not slightly different at all? where you not empty?
>>84161967i would assume its the same for all
>>84161972I don't get what you're talking about
>>84161984thats fine, im not sure either its just an innate feeling that is hard to express into words
>>84161820im 25 and stopped caring about relationships for that very reason, though not necessarily the joy part. i feel like a huge part of my identity would become lost. the punchline of my life has always been that im the lonely dude surrounded by anime posters and in love with my waifus. i feel like any sort of intimacy with a physical girl (who isnt even as attractive as my waifu toga for example) would ruin my entire sense of self, i would feel so disgusted at myself.
>>84162030yes apart from the anime part i kind of agree.do you not feel lime you are missing out though.Are there 80 year olds who could live like this? mby we die earlier
>>84162053they never mentioned anime
>>84162087im the lonely dude surrounded by anime posters and in love with my waifus?? why is that ur main takeaway from our points anime or not
>>84162099right yeah I'm blind my bad
>OP mistakingly believes that virginity is what keeps him feeling like a kidNo OP, it's the fact you haven't paid taxes yet.
I dislike women desiring sex. It disgusts me. Like looking at a monkey. I am glad to be inconspicuous, because the idea of s woman being attracted to me mass me feel dread.
