i want him to be mine, it sucks that the one man i really love cannot be mine
>>84229484You may love him, but does he love you?
>>84229502doesnt matter if he doesn't, wont stop me from loving him forever :D
>>84229484Why not ? Just contact him
>>84229520long complicated story but i send him messages like every other week/once a month and theres no response
todays a gym day, 35kms biking and then ill get out. im still too scared to do strength exercises
>>84226603It's just a matter of not having any real faith (Abrahamic or otherwise) to put my worries to rest over what comes after death.>your ideal is 3 very baseline thingsThat's not my ideal, thats my minimum. I've got a lot of other things I like about her (Her sense of style, the music she makes, her looks, her eagerness to hang with me etc etc) that make it worth pursuing her to give a reason to love beyond these surface level qualities. Also we've hung out before and got along well, my intensity lends well to her being more reserved.>i sound like such a cuck loser, but i really well and truly do love that man.Yeah I'd never get this, if it wouldn't be me in the relationship with the person I want than that love is dead in the water. Unconditional love is reserved for your own children and animals to me>>84229520Sakaki>>84229566It's fun do them, I just came back from legs. My gym got a hack squat recently gonna use it in like 4 days
>>84229647do you really need faith to put your worries to rest? >That's not my ideal, thats my minimum ah ok, i see. i assumed your "ideal" was just that cause you dont express much else you want in someone.maybe its cause youre still a bit broken after liking that guy>Unconditional love is reserved for your own children and animals to mekinda saddens me that most people think that way, unconditional love for a person outside of that feels really good. my love refuses to die so easy>My gym got a hack squat recently gonna use it in like 4 dayshack squat?
food time then gym time yay
>>84229484griffith isn't even real you stupid animal.
>>84229865im not talking about griffith retard
the bikes are bugging out today, thats great. no staff around, thank god i gave up on strength and im just letting my body ROT
i feel guilty for some of the things ive done for the last few weeks. im not someone who's good to be around other people. its not good that i have the capabilities to make people let their guard down. its scary. vagueposting vagueposting mmmmm i love vagueposting
break from the gym for 3 days and im finally able to do 10kms in 35 minutes again yay
I might be able to hang with her at da anime con and at da concert epic>>84229770Kinda. It's less even about needing an afterlife and more finding a reason not to feel immense anger and hopelessness over being unable to live forever. I imagine after growing old my loss in vigor will make dying seem like less of a waste, and I'll be just alright passing on.>maybe its cause youre still a bit broken after liking that guyI'm over it. But also, I've only met her with her twice and chatted online so not being head over heels is how it should be.>unconditional love for a person outside of that feels really good.I'd probably want to kill myself if I ever experienced that desu>hack squat?Imagine a leg press but you press down while standing at an angle vs pressing up while seated at an angle. Use google>>84230072Why would you vaguepost in your personal blog thread where nobody irl knows you thats retarded n just baiting for people to go "ooooo what do you mean by that????"
>>84230175nice nice hopefully it goes well.why would you even wish to live forever in the first place? whether it be on earth or in an afterlife>I imagine after growing old my loss in vigor will make dying seem like less of a wastei imagine so as well, or well, i less imagine it and its more like i know it. i have no vigor, so im alright with death>so not being head over heels is how it should be.fair enough >I'd probably want to kill myself if I ever experienced that desuwhy? like i said it feels better than youd imagine it to>Use googlerude >where nobody irl knows you thats retarded n just baiting for people to go "ooooo what do you mean by that????"i mean what if people who knew me WERE on here. usually people dont ask what happened and i just wanna talk about situations in a vague sense. it stresses me out so i wanna say something but i sound evil when i say the full situation so yeah
i wonder how stupid and unethical it is to wear a latex suit under outfits in public
>>84229518I want to be loved like this. Should I try tricking a gay man to get obsessed with me?
>>84230246>why would you even wish to live forever in the first place? whether it be on earth or in an afterlifeLiving is too fun to ever wanna die. I want to be hurt over and over...>why?My self worth isn't that low (no offense)>rudeI already gave you an apt description google is an addendum if you want to see a photo>i mean what if people who knew me WERE on here.I'd call you schizo but I deliberately switch up my posting style what I post about and the images I use so people can't find me easily. Granted, my worries are more founded since I've had friends that browsed here and I've also caught out people I know posting here, but it's still schizo. Speak now or forever hold your peace o algo>but i sound evil when i say the full situation so yeahWho cares? Trying to save face r9k is absurd you're already in the poor house.>>84230266Thinly veiled exhibitionism fetish
>>84230350idk, if youre gay go ahead but you cant trick people into loving you.also im not gay btw if youre thinkinf this is a faggot thing>>84230385i dont. i want to live with minimum pain and a decent amount of pleasure for a short amount of time (basically hedonism). i hate being hurt.>My self worth isn't that low (no offense)fair enough i guess, mines pretty low>Granted, my worries are more founded since I've had friends that browsed here most people ive talked to online use 4chan, like my ex or old online friends and even some family members.>Speak now or forever hold your peace o algoim hiding stuff from my relative about her partner and actively helping him make SO CALLED bad decisions (ive been sneaking him alcohol, being on his side in fights and helping him keep secrets from her) cause i feel bad for him and have this urge to protect him.ever since ive been there, everyones started fighting so its obviously my fault>Thinly veiled exhibitionism fetishim more of a voyeurjoking idk im just a damn horny bastard
What method of suicide should I go with?
>>84230743none. dont kill yourself
>>84230664>i hate being hurt.I hate not being hurt. Self harm is gay and the gym is too controlled, man I should box or something FUCK I hate being broke. Also no pain and maximum pleasure, where's the fun in that? The type to play games on easy mode>most people ive talked to online use 4chan, like my ex or old online friends and even some family members.I think I'd smoke myself if I found any of my family on here, how do you even find out about that? I only know like 3 people tops that have at any point browsed the site daily, and only one r9k poster.>cause i feel bad for him and have this urge to protect him.If he's in an abusive relationship would keeping him inebriated really help him get out any faster? And if it's not abusive I don't understand interfering, better to let it run it's course. Also how do you even get to that point I know jack about my siblings partners we aren't remotely close>im more of a voyeurFigures>>84230743Death by cop duh
>>84230971get a job and go box then (im joking, i know youre struggling with that)>Also no pain and maximum pleasure, where's the fun in that?i said minimum and decent amount, i still like some pain and tbf im not getting much pleasure other than buying material goods.i play most games on hardest difficulty >how do you even find out about that? my uncle told me he used it, my mum also asked me like 4 years ago "hey (name) whats 4chan?" so shes probably been on here at some point too>If he's in an abusive relationship would keeping him inebriated really help him get out any faster?no and hes not going to leave anyways, but alcohol helps him in his day to day to not feel depressed and keep him motivated so i just help him out by giving him some>Also how do you even get to that point I know jack about my siblings partners we aren't remotely closewell we all hang out together, and me and him get sent out to do stuff and we hang out one on one while shes doing baby stuff, so we get a lot of time to talk alone. we're basically friends >Figuresok but im not a cuck tho
>>84231082I got an appointment with tha job agency tomorrow so maybe I will>not getting much pleasure other than buying material goodsMostly same, would be nice to own physical consoles...>i play most games on hardest difficultyHardest game you beat? For me it'd probably be Dead Cells on max difficulty or Halo (the first one) on legendary>my uncle told me he used itTerrifying>alcohol helps him in his day to day to not feel depressed and keep him motivated so i just help him out by giving him someOnly time will tell if it's for the best, in your shoes I probably wouldn't give the alcohol but family doesn't drink so the idea is stranger to me.>we get a lot of time to talk alone. we're basically friendsAlien idea to me, not that I'm jumping to befriend my in-laws anyway. Nights
>>84231139hopefully. ill pray for you>Hardest game you beat?not sure but id probably say killzone 2 cause the aiming is really god awful.dead cells any good?>Only time will tell if it's for the bestif he fucks up ill stop, but for now its fine>not that I'm jumping to befriend my in-laws anywayhes not really my in law, the relative is incredibly loosely related to me and hes just her boyfriend goodnight, sleep well man
new rumia is pretty cute
>>84231352if only it wasnt furyu tbdesu im worried about their quality.also even tho rumia is cute i dont like her that much, i really want remi and flan and marisa and ibaraki and patchie
hes a little ballsy fucker man. if i get caught giving this guy alcohol im gonna get murdered
drank wine together while cooking fried rice. twas nice. best fried rice ive ever had too
ive lost a bit of drive on german cause i struggle to speak the damn language, i can't get the words right when speaking. i want my crush to help me :(
christ he got too drunk and we were standing inside talking about his baby and cleaning and drinking wine for so much longer.at least hes happy i guess
the fucker climbed on the roof and i can hear him up there walking aroung so i told his gf to play music so she cant hear him too THIS IS WHY I DONT HAVE FRIENDS im a shit friend
