have been suicidal since 5th grade wish I had killed myself back then. now that I am an adult in his mid 20s people would just lol and go>yea ... did see that coming lol
>>84284145Did you ever think about suicide with extra steps?If you enlisted 2 years ago you might have been one of those Americans who died in the Iran War. Or you could have been sent in the first wave of ground troops
ooh im a colorjak yes im a colorjak
>>84284145>have been suicidal since 5th grade I'm one-upping you with suicidal since 3rd grade, I was first institutionalized at eight years old.>wish I had killed myself back then.also same.anyway the one up stuff is a joke obviously. sorry man
I feel like some cheese was missed...
>>84284165>I was first institutionalized at eight years old.interesting. what did they do there?
>>84284179chesse?wdym?
>>84284211I don't remember. It was a youth facility so mostly drawing and group talk therapy.
I've thought about this shit ever since I was 13. I came to a personal revelation and it was the start of my issues about personality, I had thought 'I really like anime, is this how I think a person who likes anime would act?' because at the time I acted really retarded. When I first had this thought I cried the entire night and this idea would turn into something more extreme throughout my life. I stopped going outside and I always talked about cute anime girls and stuff with my friends until they all stopped hanging out with me, not even in the sense that they ignored me but they basically just said "shut the fuck up, you're annoying. Stop talking about anime shit, we're not hanging out with you anymore". This conflict with my friends who made up my entire social life was something that had never happened before, my revelation and this conflict, sitting alone in a new room, it created a feeling of emptiness and loneliness I can't even describe. It was so awful. This was the first time I wanted to kill myself. I told myself every day that I would do it, and then I wouldn't. The bullying didn't help. I got pretty damn close too. It's not the last period of my life when I had thoughts like this. I was only 13.
>>84284161im no american but I did enlistand joining the military broke me even morethat's where I realize that I am literally bottom of the barrel trash - before that I always had these powerfantasies about becoming a Officer and war hero (I fully bought into the "ww3 about to happen"-fear mongering)but at best people felt sorry for me and admired me like some people admire disabled people for living a "normal" lifeand at worst I was outright mockedon top of that basically everyone had a flaccid 5 incher
>>84284249Does your country have benefits for being a veteran, like a pension or something?"but at best people felt sorry for me and admired me like some people admire disabled people for living a "normal" lifeand at worst I was outright mocked"Sounds like it is better than your life right now, did they not let you re-enlist?
>>84284249>on top of that basically everyone had a flaccid 5 incherlmao
>>84284312>Sounds like it is better than your life right nownot reallyat least now I can distract myself 24/7>Does your country have benefits for being a veteran, like a pension or something?yes but only if you serve 3 years+ (pension only after age 55)
>>84284307I love you fedchan
>>84284341I sure hope you served 3 years then
>>84284145>wish I had killed myself back thenYou really should have done it.https://derpibooru.org/2065473>>84284179YOU WILL BE FUCKING DEFENESTRAED
Take that knife of yours
Shove it right in you
And bleed yourself dry from it
>>84284220>>84284179>>84285175>wdymhere we go
Die from the gushing wounds
Because of how much blood comes out
Take the death that you have
And make it become you
Slice open your own flesh
And cause the bleeding within
>>84284230You'd be the perfect gf if you had you know a vagina
Organs and vessels all burst
And the body will completely die
When all the vital fluids run out
Because that will certainly happen
Because of the fatal injuries
It is just a thing that happens
With this kind of violence
And as the violence happens
You start to find yourself dying
You wonder how this could have happened
But these were your actions
Actions that you yourself stood behind
And hoped to propel you to success
Like that would ever do anything
But you will find yourself not ready for what happens
That is the impending death to be
And the finality of death
Which you would experience brutally
leeward's suicide tm
>>84285860YOU WILL BE FUCKING BLED DRY
>>84284145im sorry youve been so miserable for so long...please dont kill yourself bud <3
I don't get why do you spend so much time trying to get that guy banned cheesebro. You know he can just ban evade like you, right?
>>84286937CHOKE ON YOUR OWN BLOOD JUSTPASSINGTHROUGH
