i was put on antipsychotics when i was really young, around 12 years old. ever since then i've noticed that basically everything has become impossible, it feels like having ADD but without the possibility of treatment because nobody believes you when you say that it is because of the antipsychoticsi can't read without getting immediately disinterested, i can't play games, can't commit to projects, can't do anything that doesn't give an instant dopamine hit. it feels like i'm a fucking cuck to my own broken D2 receptors all because my stupid fucking shrinks thought i was a schizo.i'm thinking of ordering addy and just forcing myself to microdose it and hope i didn't get cut with meth. i'll update you guys if i go through with this
>>84313116I know the feeling, no one believes anti psychotics have any side effects or they pretend they don't so I keep taking them. I don't get it uless theyre just lying to get me to take them.I have my mom denying they cause weight gain when I gained 30-60 pounds on them mulitple times.Meh
>>84313116honestly books specifically are not really of this age, they're kind of otudated and it's reasonably young people have a hard time with them. even TV is starting to be like that with some people. if VR replaces computer browsing like this will probably becoming tiresome too. it's just outdated technology. video games are hit or miss, you can truly optimize or analyze the fun fun out of them. 'projects' are hard in general for a lot of people because most people are not task masters anyway.
this is me but without the antipsychotics. So I guess it could've been worse
>>84313139sorry lots of typos
>>84313130i have issues with binge-eating now because i am so restless and can't feel any pleasure except from things that give me that instant dopamine release, ie jacking off, eating sugary slop, etc. i dont take them either. my doctor put me on rexulti and i laughed at him because i was just so fucking tired of having docs throw meds at me. since 12 ive been on 4 diff ssris, 1 snri, 2 mood stabilizers, and something like 4 antipsychotics. none of these things have helped me at all. had better mental health after tripping on lsd lmao, though i wouldnt do that again
>>84313139but man, i want to read philosophy, i want to read VNs. hell, even after 3 years of seroquel i was just BARELY able to keep my attention together to get through reading Chaos;Head NOAH, but then i was put on a high dose of zyprexa and any leftover attention span was just gone.i dont like TV or anything, and i cant even pay attention most of the time to anime and shit like that. i've tried like 5 times this week to watch Mushoku Tensei and i just kept tabbing out to go jack off because if it isn't instant gratification, i'm fucked
