it's really fucking hard, i genuinely want to die and i'm not afraid of the end one bit, yet it still feels almost impossible to just let yourself fall, it takes a sort of "fuck it" kind of courage that i couldn't muster up enough of. i'd planned to get very drunk beforehand but i didn't have enough left to make much of a difference. i still want to die though and not a single person saw me so i can try again and i'll try to be more mentally prepared for the actual act of climbing over the railing and then jumping off, and also more drunk.
>>84397514Its not hard at all just lean forward you fucking pussy
You feel like you dont want to die because you actually dont want to die. You only consider suicide because it offers a solution to your problems, but you know in your heart you can face your problems without killing yourself. You can find a way to live
>>84397514How old are u tho?
Why do you want to die? What happened Anon?
>>84397514There is something that exists in all living organisms that prevents this. If you're depressed enough, you can overcome this.
just gonna let you know that youre going to feel infinite regret every second of that fall once you let go
>>84397514Be careful my bro, there are cameras on just about every bridge in America, especially near urban areas. If they notice you on a cam, they will try to figure out who you are so they can do an intervention. I would look out for increased police patrols of the bridge in nothing else.
>>84397539This is factually correct. Interviews of jump survivors show that literally 100% of them regretted it instantly and falling made them snap back to reality and want to live and actually address the things that made them want to jump to begin with
>>8439752828>>84397539no, quite finite regret
>>84397514>stop self from dying>I want to dieJust jerk off and have a nice nap bruh.
Unless you're physically disabled, I wouldn't do it. I used to be suicidal too, somehow turned my life around after a decade, unfortunately I injured my spine, the level of pain is unbelievable, I can't stand for longer than a couple minutes anymore, I can't even lay down either, I'm in pain all day. I wish I would've seen how beautiful life was sooner, now it's too late, my plan is to shoot myself in the head soon, I'm just scared I'll miss something and end up worst.
>>84397514Something like 70 or 90% of people who jumped off the golden gate bridge and survived say they had found the solution to their problems within the several seconds it took for them to fall.
>>84397556Cant you get a steroid and physical therapy to fix ur spine
>>84397564There's no cure for bad spinal discs. I've had all of that and more. My last option is rods and screws in my back, but my spine is messed up in different spots so it'd be pointless unless I want my entire spine with rods and screws, even then, it most likely wouldn't take away the pain, once the discs get damaged, that's it.
>>84397572How did you get them? I dont want bad spinal discs
>>84397556This is why if you use a shotgun, you don't use bird shot ammo. Buckshot is a nice step up however you can't go wrong with slugs.
>>84397514You don't want to die, you want your problems to end. The mind is a computer, it is a series of if:thens. It is also hard-wired to be averse to death. For example, a hiker got his arm trapped under a boulder, and then after a few days of starvation and pain, proceeded to saw his arm off with a dull pocket knife. When he described cutting through the raw nerves in interviews, you could see it on his face, it was the worst shit he ever experienced; but the alternative was death, and life is programmed to refuse that. These instincts ensure a higher success (breeding) rate, and the lack of them is indicative of a mutation that will soon be eradicated by virtue of unsustainability (a mutation you don't have, obviously).I am in the same boat. I have tried a few times, popping a shit ton of pills was my go-to. Each time I suddenly didn't want to die anymore until I was in the hospital, and then I was angry and confused at why I told anyone. One time I ate a shit ton of activated carbon. I was throwing up to the point I was spewing nothing but bile, shit hurt pretty bad after a while. The subconscious mind can and will take over, to your benefit or detriment, mostly when (you) it is under threat. Unless you are suddenly killed by something you can do nothing about, usually in a painful way you will inevitably try to fight, you're here to stay. You're in this roller coaster for life; unless you somehow found a way to kill the demiurge, all you can do choose why you scream with the ups and downs, from thrill or fear. Either choice does absolutely nothing.
>>84397599I ate the carbon after downing two bottles of tylenol, to flush it out after throwing up for 9 hours straight. Apparently shit worked.
>>84397514>I'm not afraid>describes fear
>>84397514That's why I'm doing shotgun to the head
>>84397599i didn't think "i don't want to die", i thought "it's too scary i can't do it". it's the physical sensation of fear that was overwhelming. and only fear of the physical act of jumping at that. i would probably find it just as hard to do it if the fall would only hurt my ankles with 0 chance of killing me. i got over fear of death a while ago, but it wasn't the only thing involved apparently. i absolutely, positively want to die, you should believe me. i don't care about my problems, what i'm missing out on, what i'll leave unfinished, what people who care about me will think, what will happen to my possessions, i don't care about any of that, i just no longer want to be on this earth, i've seen what there was for me to see, i'm done.
>>84397563They regretted it, sure, but there's no way they thought up solutions in their head within that short of a timeframe, unless the solution is just proclaiming that you want to live.
>>84397674>i didn't think "i don't want to die", i thought "it's too scary i can't do it"Those are the same thing. It's self-preservation.
I wonder just how much willpower Skyking had to come up with, to go through with it.
>>84397674my advice is go to another country for a few months and see how beautiful life is, how different peoples lives are. if you find a place where you feel happy then find a way to stay permanently. there is a lot of nuanced beauty out there that makes the soul feel good and makes life worth living. you're in a hole of despair but that can change, you arent special in the sense that it cant change for you. it can change for anyone.>t. was suicidal now happily living in bliss on another continent
>>84397514Jumping is an awful way to kill yourself. Your survival instinct will kick in and you'll spend the end of your life in a state of absolute terror. I'd just take tons of heroin instead and doze off to a beautiful sunset or something.