>>84436977
But I have no couch. I can give her a little pillow for a bed I guess, I bowl of water to bathe in maybe. How much does a fairy eat, anyway?

>>84437050
>But I have no couch
It's only an expression anyways, a chair will do, or even your bed if you have none of those

>How much does a fairy eat, anyway?
Not much, but she won't ask for permission before digging through your food

>>84436977
I'm a neet too so I guess we are fucked lmao

>>84436977
having a real fairy should be able to be monetized somehow so thats my angle. i would maybe also try to have sexual gratification from it.

>>84436977
I wish somebody did a photoshop of Kim Jong Un but he has the shape of Air Force One, its name would be Kim Jong One

>>84437084
What makes you think she'll let you do either of those things?

>>84436977
I'd make her get a goldang job

>>84437129
Nuh uh, can't make her, she ain't going anywhere

>>84437094
you said she refuses to leave so i assume she'll tolerate some stuff

>>84437135
then I'm gonna lock all the cabinets so she doesn't have any food haha get a job, lazy fairy!

>>84437145
She's just relying on the fact you're not exactly gonna make her move from the couch

>>84437150
You'll have to pull out some food at some point to eat for yourself!

>>84437180
>You'll have to pull out some food at some point to eat for yourself!
no I'll eat out every day until she gets her fairy ass a job

ill rape her tiny cunt and force her to be my little cum dump

>>84437061
>Not much, but she won't ask for permission before digging through your food
Not much to dig through lmao, I bet she can't even get the heavy fridge door open. I'll hand feed her some licorice or something though, I like having a pet fairy.

>>84437221
Well then, she'll just have to come with you in the car, thanks for treating her to dinner

>NEET
>Working hard as a main engineer of a huge dungeon project

>>84437238
>I bet she can't even get the heavy fridge door open
She could still mooch off of whatever you put on your plate, plus dig into chip bags and such. And be careful who you call a pet, she's liable to kick your ass for saying that!

>>84437180
well the fairy can either leave or i'm gonna try to extract value it. i wont rape it but i might feel it up and stuff

I would ask if she could hug me and try to nice talk with her, if she is girl he could be a 5m giant or 50cm fairy, doesn't matter

i'd probably walk past it naked after showering and stuff with erections

>>84437274
She might try to get back at you for stuff like that

>>84437242
she can't get in the car I locked her in the house for being a lazy mooch!

>>84437283
Why would you do that anonerino?

>>84437293
Hmph, well then, she'll just pester you all night and keep you up until you feed her!

>>84437288
well. i'd figure out what i could get away with
>>84437323
i think its hot because i have exhibitionist impulses and id feel justified doing it because its free to leave at any time

>>84437329
sounds like this fairy wants to be locked up at night

>>84437355
She'd probably try to lift your underwear up to you and tell you to 'cover yourself already!'

>>84437388
Or just shoot the pervert on the spot

>>84437366
Locked up? Like a pet? Where!?

>>84437405
Justified. Fire at will.
Maybe she is overwhelmingly stronger than average human, but would save some normal girls from such a deviant.

Just say that you don't believe in fairies and it will die

>>84437456
normal girls wouldn't be bothered by seeing a guy naked at his own house.

>>84437461
Normal girls aren't half the length of your dick

>>84437469
well guess a fairy shouldn't invade a mans private space then, should she

>>84437473
Hey, she's gotta live somewhere, might as well be your place

>>84437444
yeah sounds like it. idk if she'd make a good pet, you have to train your pets to behave and she seems too naughty.

I guess normally a pet girl would be kept in a dog cage or something but I suppose a fairy needs a bird cage...

>>84437505
Train her, train her to do what exactly? Ah well, at least you'll actually feed her.

>>84437485
well then she knows the terms of the deal!

>>84437547
Hmph, fine, but she's keeping her eyes closed when you're like that, and you better not sit anywhere close to her!

>>84437517
idk what are fairy girls good at? since fairy girls are always creating mischief I'd probably train her to be obedient and still, maybe she'd have to fly over and sit quietly on my shoulder cause it's funny when she pouts

>>84436977
I mean, do nothing? Is she a bother?

>>84437579
Depends on how much you mind her keeping the TV on a channel she wants, hogging up an entire seat on the couch, and munching on your food while not cleaning up after herself

>>84437554
Oh please she'll pretend at first but soon she'll be fine with it and probably like it. you can't keep your eyes closed forever!

>>84437584
> Depends on how much you mind her keeping the TV on a channel she wants

I never watch TV but will she keep the volume at least a little bit down?

> hogging up an entire seat on the couch,
I mean if it's a fairy isn't she like the size of my hand?

> and munching on your food while not cleaning up after herself
What does she eat?

>>84437268
>She could still mooch off of whatever you put on your plate
I'd trap her between two pieces of bread and lick my lips and talk about having fairy sandwich MWAHAHAHAHA!

> she's liable to kick your ass for saying that!
My buns are augmented, her attacks are futile!

>>84437608
>I never watch TV but will she keep the volume at least a little bit down?
Maybe while youre sleeping, unless its a really good movie on

>I mean if its a fairy isn't she like the size of my hand?
Possibly as small as your finger, but wont stop her from sitting in the middle of the seat to take up the whole thing

>What does she eat?
Whatever she can get her hands on, but mostly junk food and sweets

>>84437459
I don't believe in tax collectors.

>>84437630
> Maybe while youre sleeping, unless its a really good movie on

I would make her a deal if she can keep the volume down so it doesn't bother me in any way. I will let her stay. If not I would catch her in a jar and throw her out my window.

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>>84437620
Eugh, she has to deal with buns, and then she has to deal with a different kind of buns? Too many buns! Though of all the buns to end up between the bread is definitely preferred.

>>84436977
SEXO SEXO SEXO
Need I say more?

>>84437658
She'll agree to that.

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>>84437715
I can picture it now...

>>84437789
lmao, adorable, she'll probably shower in your sink

>>84436977
impregnate her, pretty obviously. I would make her sit spread eagle with her legs up and id jerk off and completely fill and cover her in my righteous seed.

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>>84437505
Bird cage...

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>>84437687
Hah, that'll learn her. Eat and be eaten!
I think I would name her Jill, so I can menace with making her a Jill sandwich if she misbehaves.
I would be nice to her though if she behaves. Maybe buy her pic related so she can practice her poledancing skills.

>>84437986
seems perfect for a fairy, doesn't it? I bet she'd learn to love her birdcage too

>>84438182
>so I can menace with making her a Jill sandwich if she misbehaves.
Would you follow through? What if she called your bluff?

>>84438194
It would take a while, she might spend some time rattling the bars, but if it was comfy enough she might get used to it

>>84436977
I bet she'd leave on her own cause she'd get jealous when I brought girls home.

>>84438240
Or maybe those girls would wonder why you have a fairy taking up the middle of the couch

>>84438248
I'm sure they'd wonder why there was a fairy around, I would too. but I'd just tell the girls not to worry about her, she's just like a pesky little sister she'll leave on her own when things start getting steamy

>>84438267
Good luck having things get steamy when you're a seat apart from each other with her separating you two

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>>84436977
Ask her to use magic to swap sizes with me and let me worship her feet.

>>84438277
oh, so this fairy IS the jealous type huh? trying to cockblock me, that's not a very good roommate

>>84438310
Who said she had to be a good roommate? As long as she's in that middle seat though, you ain't getting no kissy time with your gf.

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>>84438320
well if that's the way it's going to be we'll have to kick the fairy out

>>84438212
>Would you follow through?
Of course not. Fairy is fren not food.

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>>84438361
Bested by a fairy the size of your pinky finger, eh?

>>84438370
Then you'll need someway to escalate if she's not scared...

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>>84438373
not for long, your days are numbered, pest!

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>>84438387
The birdcage again, curses!

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Remember, fairies are in charge, not you

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fqwefeqwefe

>>84438480
tis what you deserve though

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>>84439966
Oh kiss my ass, I don't deserve that!

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>>84436977
That would be fine. I would take care of her the best I could. Do you think she would want that? To be pampered? Honestly, I would be a giant(6ft7) compared to her so would she be afraid of me? Interesting concept OP.

>>84440003
From her perspective you'd be like 150 feet tall. That said, she's far too prideful and sassy to admit to being afraid.

>>84440009
Hmm ok then that would be fine. Honestly, I feel like I would need to put a bell on her just to make sure I do not squash her with either my feet or butt wherever she likes to hang out. I wouldnt mind if she wanted to chill on couch and what not.

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>>84440033
She's durable enough to survive getting stepped on or sat on...she'll just be very angry at you cause it's humiliating

>>84438698
why can't fairies wash themselves tho

>>84440076
They can, humans are just patronizing

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>>84440003
If you really wanna please her, leave candies on the couch for her to snack on

>>84440003
>6'7"
Jesus christ you're huge anon, are you a lanklet?

>>84436977
Be worried that the cats might swipe at it alot, and be in a pickle of, actively making the cats outside to accommodate the fairy, or actively try and get the fairy back home,

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>>84436977
she can stay if she gives me hugs
otherwise I'd kick her out

>>84441039
This! Hugs with fairy :3

>>84436977
>>84437061
I have a lazyboy chair I never use so she can have it. What happens next depends on what else she does. I'd probably try grooming her into a romantic/sexual relationship first by kissing her goodnight every night.

>>84440000
Congratulations on the things you do deserve, king

>>84440000
that was a very rude move

>>84441732
What's that supposed to mean?

wdfwddffwfdf

>>84436977
its about to get grimm if you know what im saying. do fairies regenerate?

>>84442204
Probably...why? What are you going to do?

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Why are people so mean to the fairies?

>>84442456
I'd happily trade places with her.

>>84438381
I will think of a new way to bully her when I need to. It would get boring doing the same thing every time, and she might start calculating when it was worth it. Better keep her guessing!

>>84442553
Surely there can't be that many ways to bully a fairy!

act kind until I get a chance to tape the fairy down, then lick her until I get bored and let her writhe around trying to escape, covered in spit
if she struggles adorably enough I'll fap while watching her