Thread for discussions about selfharm and mutual supportsummer is pretty much herehey>How are you doing today?>Any plans for today?>When was the last time you hurt yourself?>Why did you hurt yourself?>Is there anything bothering you right now?
links:> long list of self harm alternatives (thank you muddy):https://imgur.io/a/7Q2zgw7>a first aid post cuting:https://www.lifesigns.org.uk/first-aid-for-self-injury-and-self-harm/>a wound care guide:https://docs.google.com/document/d/1CsvJs8qNCVkHWHKekMSmCn6qn0GBEcgnq9fIqlA6Uv0/mobilebasic> bpd workbook:https://d-pdf.com/book/1781/read>a bpd Information Book (anon said it's exceptionally good)https://annas-archive.org/md5/1a4f329474320214a120a4d553c6b60c> bdbt (dialectical behavioral therapy)workbook is intended for BPD but can work for anyone:https://cursosdepsicologia.com.ar/wp-content/uploads/2021/05/THEDIA1.pdfPlease don't post any drastic images and if you have to, spoiler them
>>84507440HEY CATHELLO HI
>>84507435>How are you doing today?not too well>Any plans for today?I want to clean my room, but I dont think I'll manage>When was the last time you hurt yourself?last night>Why did you hurt yourself?my boyfriend said he stopped loving me>Is there anything bothering you right now?I dont really have any other reason to exist besides for him, I havent really decided what to do once he leaves me, im too tired to decide anything
>>84507684ah im really pathetic aren't I, he said he must really hate himself to have asked me out, and then I still imagined him cuddling me so I could sleep, I cant sleep without thinking of him, but he doesnt really want me anymore, I dont know what im going to do without him
>>84507666hey hey how's it going?>>84507684hello anon>not too wellsorry to hear about that but it's not surprising after something like thatHope you get over it though >dont really have any other reason to existmaybe you could find some?
>>84507759I tried before, I havent had one for years, but i was staying in hopes I would find one, then I did, and he doesnt want me to stay, I dont think I have it in me for another try, so ill probably just bedrot until something happens
>>84502367>shit happens and i'm back to square one.One day we will form lasting habits. One day...>sounds rough even thinking about itI'm not really sure how I managed it. My body was in complete agony when I started>sometimes i wonder if the people spending that amount of money in a store think the stuff they buy is actually worth that muchI would assume so. At least in a sense. Although probably not if they're thinking solely in material costs.>>84503432>if someone tells me to call the samaritans again i will lose my shitI know the feeling. If you can afford to see a shrink privately I'd recommend it because the wait times are horrendous.>>84503643For what it's worth, I know someone who's estranged from his family and moved to the other side of the world. I'm not really sure what they did to warrant it, but it doesn't seem like he regret doing it.>>84507684Sorry to hear that anon. I know how awful it is when someone stops loving you (it's why I ended up posting here regularly).It's really, really difficult but I promise it gets easier after a few months, especially if you have a support group like this thread. So you're always welcome to talk about your feelings here.
btw I'm thinking about making the minecraft server again and so when would you guys like to play and what version or maybe continue the old save? (if it's possible idk)
>>84507759same as yesterday really im still looking for some advice or anything really
I have returned alive and well but quite tired. Man traveling even short distances is rough.>>84507435heya cat, how's it going?>>84507900I'd like to try to go back to the old if it's possible since would be cool to see our base again.>when would you guys like to play sometime weekend should be good, but let's see what others want to do>>84507666hey sisyphus! saw you in the last thread when looking at archived one. Sorry it sounds like things haven't been great at times latelyHow's it going now? Good to see you again>>84502367>so i'd say give it a go if you ever feel like it.one of the few series i'd ever make time for. Don't mind bumping up this game over others> if you just want to enjoy the game.nintendo making games being too hard is a huge mistake considering target audience for them is as broad as it is. If it's too hard for me to enjoy....>seems like they actually subverted your expectations in a good way.i'm going on and on about it at this point, but for a game so blatantly honest about who it's appealing to, they do a lot of things quite well and it feels touching at types in a non pervy way>did you sleep better?not at all, which makes 3 nights now, but tonight i will for sure
>>84503432> i stopped because i dont actually have an eating disorderI'd say try to take little steps to improve overall nutrition if you can. Even drinking more milk to get some extra calories in. its good you can you don't have an eating disorder now, but as you probably realized it's easy to self reinforce the behavior of not eating, which could in turn develop one even if you didn't have one before.> i was genuinely suicidal and homicidal at like 10 or 11sadly a normal age to develop these types of things. I think that's around when I started to start thinking about dying because my family situation deteriorated so badly then...>. also it means that its difficult to know where to begin when there are so many issuesit is like that. I think this is something you almost need to reason through. Am I like this because of a thing that happened, another condition, or do I just feel it? Work your way down and some issues feed into each other, but even the process of trying to unravel these problems can help if it doesn't all get better instantly
>>84503643> i dont like how family is almost always viewed as something good for their children.The problem is, most people at least kinda love their kids and you can have a dysfunctional family, and still be better than the alternative. Problem is when you cross from dysfunctional to outright abusive. It's so fucked up and contrary to how things should be that it's hard to believe till you can't avoid seeing it.>it doesnt feel like they 'earned' it.Only you can decide, but from your posts alone it's clear they caused a lot of pain in your life and if this continues with contact with them, there's no need to force yourself out of obligation you feel you don't have> i keep waiting and waiting and nothing happensthis one of the worst issues I have with family trouble is it derails every other relationship. Family are supposed to be the ones who make you feel secure in the world, so them doing the opposite makes it really hard to achieve other healthy relationships and is one big thing I think you'd need to overcome
they made me stay in psychward 4 days i didnt like it i was crying and crying and i couldnt sleep and i was scared
>>84507867and last but not least, hi discanon>>84508337hi anon. Sorry but it's over now. At current state, I'd try avoid anything you can to avoid back in that situation
>>84508402i threw out all my blades im trying recovering im so scared to go back i dont want to i dont want to go back ini dont trust them now i dont forgive them they wouldnt let me out they set a trap for me and wouldnt let me out i didnt like it it was so scary thinking im going to be in there for weeks
>>84508427I know it's easier said than done recovering, but hopefully help give a jolt to help. Are you seeing anyone for mental health issues outside of being in the psychward?
bumpwent to the garage to mess around a little
The last time I cut my thighs was last Friday. I had a completely pointless argument with my father; he was under the influence of substances and threatened to hurt me. I locked myself in my room and my first thoughts were: I don't intend to let anyone hurt me more than myself. So I wrecked my whole right thigh.
Once again my dryer put me to sleep when I wasn't planning on it. This has happened more times than I can count...I've been playing even more Tomodachi life and making the island look nice. I couldn't get into it in Animal Crossing but it's tickling my brain here. It's kept the paranoia at bay when logically it should be flaring up big time.>>84507900I'm not sure if I have much time to play on it but that would be cool.If you need somewhere to host it I have access to one of those free Oracle servers.>>84508159With regards to the cold bedrest is what will do you best, but see a doctor if it gets worse or persists for about a week.As for relapsing, getting distracted by something might be your best option.>>84508231Hello hello.>traveling even short distances is roughI agree. But it was probably worth the hassle, right?>>84508337Sorry to hear that, anon. Hopefully you can get some outpatient stuff after that.>>84509047More bike stuff?
>>84508159feaver still bad?>>84508231heyI'm okay ^^just tired>go back to the old>sometime weekendoky>>84509283hellosounds like terrible company to be around >>84509301heya>dryer put me to sleephow??>kept the paranoia at bayyay>logically it shouldit shouldn't >have access to one of those free Oracle servers.hm maybe we could thy that out sounds like a cool idea because last time we had some issues with connecting >bike stuff?yep ^^just overhauling some pedals
>>84507435>good newsI passed my final, pic rel.Watched witch hat atelier. I still like frieren and Dungeon Meshi better, but I admit, I've also asked why you can just major in forbidin magic. The system is interesting and magic anarchist are a thought provoking concept. >>How are you doing today?I quit my job. didn't even put in two weeks. I snapped at the manager and I don't even feel bad.>>Any plans for today?I went to an interview for a real job. I think it went well. Other applications opened again, so I can still hope. I applied for the police out of a lack of options. I don't want to be in a situation to shot anyone again, but at least I have expierence.>>When was the last time you hurt yourself?Idk, maybe tonight. I'm debating calling the hotline.>>Why did you hurt yourself?I think I desirve it>>Is there anything bothering you right now?The uncertainty of the future. The gas prices just shot up dramatically. I can't aford to go to low income jobs anymore. My should be together and it all just fell apart of my own doing. I want to be paid well and be respected, but nothing offers that and I guess I can't handle not having it.>>84507900hi cat>minecraftI'd be interested. I haven't played minecraft much at all, but I'm interested in seeing if it works on steam deck. >>84508231hi officeanon>Man traveling even short distances is rough.yeah a hot box car always made it terrible for me.
i left the box cutter i bought in my drawer for weeks, last time i checked on it i found it not so clean, it wasnt covered and dust could eat it, so i didnt cut.i know it's good that im not cutting but i dont know what to do with what i feel.wish i didnt miss the last thread i was active on, some nice topics are lost on me :[>>84507435>heyhey cati have something interestingi wanna talk about :>>>84507900i would like to play but i'll be busy :/>>84508231>traveling even short distances where did you go?
sleepy>>84509967hello ^^good job hope you manage to not hurt yourself frenyou don't deserve it>seeing if it works on steam deck.yep we should try it out >>84510098heyo>dont know what to do with what i feel.all I can think of is finding distractions>some nice topics are lost on me :[you can always bring them back I think >have something interestingyea :Dwhtis it??>but i'll be busy :/so you know when you won't be busy?
>>84510374>is finding distractionsyea>you can always bring them backtrue but the atmosphere was something ~_~>whtis it??you said you're sleepy so i'm gonna talk about it tomorrow cuz i wanna talk alot :>>you know when you won't be busy?honestly i won't be 24/7 busy but idk if i would be in a mood for minecraftjust few months i hope :D
>>84509301>dryer put me to sleep when I wasn't planning on it. wish I had something that put me to sleep consistently >I couldn't get into it in Animal Crossing but it's tickling my brain here.you have more control over the residents maybe? Animal crossing villagers were very hard for me to actually care much about>spoilersomething bothering you?>But it was probably worth the hassle, right?for sure, but man am I physically drained>>84509838>just tiredyou me and both.. Hoping tonights the night i sleep a bunch finally get on track>>84509967> I think it went well.wishing you luck. You deserve better than shit it sounds like you had to put up with, so good riddance, but also know it's a complete show. Hang in there. Know you're not feeling great overall but hope you can hang in there without slipping back and into doing anything too harsh>can't aford to go to low income jobs anymoreIt's absurd how prohibitively more expensive getting to and from work is now. I don't even want to go out far regularly anymore just since I don't feel like wanting to pay it>yeah a hot box car always made it terrible for meBefore I had decent work I drove one that the AC went bad on and just couldn't get things fixed/replaced and hot months were horrible>>84510374gn might be soon for me too>>84510098>, so i didnt cut.worked out well in the end I'd say>where did you go?to see Hatsune Miku
todays been long and hard and painful. sort of want to cut idk. itd be euphoric to stab myself. i kinda want to go out with my scars visible. itd be nice to be seen. not really people are so weird about things and i hate attention but i fantasise about going out and people care and feel sorry for me>>84507867>If you can afford to see a shrink privately I'd recommend it because the wait times are horrendous.good idea i should look into them>someone who's estranged from his family and moved to the other side of the worldoh good for him. thatd be very nice to do..>>84508300>little steps to improve overall nutrition if you canyeah i try. on bad days i try to eat very 'unhealthy' calorie dense foods because im not eating otherwise and its tasty enough to motivate me to eat. ugh i am so conflicted on food, im so close to restricting again it sucks but it feels so so good>I think that's around when I started to start thinking about dyingsorry to hear that. want to talk about it? fine if not>Work your way down and some issues feed into each other, but even the process of trying to unravel these problems can help if it doesn't all get better instantlyyea good advice. tbdesu i think most or even all of my issues are trauma-related>>84508308>most people at least kinda love their kidsoh yeah i get that even if its completely unhealthy. to be honest the thought of my family loving me makes me feel a little sick. my situation with them right now is so surreal. i dont know how to put it in words but it is maddening having the exact same people who were constant threats to me, who would hurt me horrifically all the time (my coordination of my body and sense of pain/touch is completely fucked from the abuse), just be weird acquaintances/loving family(??) to me now. its just.... i dont know>there's no need to force yourself out of obligationtrue, i dont have any sense of connection to them. i think i am afraid ill miss them
>>84509838>how??Something about the hum of it just sends me to sleep better than anything. It's happened probably over a dozen times since I moved into a unit with one.>it shouldn'tMaybe not the paranoia, but I do have reason to brace for impact, so to speak.>last time we had some issues with connectingIt had almost no downtime last time I hosted something, so I'd be happy to host it there.>just overhauling some pedalsIs there anything left of the original bike?>>84509967Great job on the test!Hopefully things will start looking up and you'll be able to find some decent employment soon.I know it can seem very hopeless when your life is in stasis but things can change unexpectedly and that's something you have to always keep in mind otherwise you might check out before it happens.>>84510098i dont know what to do with what i feelI think you can take some pride in that. It's not entirely comparable, but I feel some pride in knowing that I've not had a breakdown in a few months. Something about the indomitable human spirit.>>84510545>wish I had something that put me to sleep consistentlyDoes white/brown noise do anything for you?>you have more control over the residents maybe? That's, I definitely care about these guys more. I have been genuinely shocked when they try to cuck each other during confessions.I was thinking more layout-wise but thinking about it, it's much easier and faster to do things and it's a bit like a city simulator.>something bothering you?Yes but it's one of those things I'm worried about discussing here.>man am I physically drainedI can't blame you. I always need a few days to recover after that sort of thing.>>84510691>good idea i should look into themHopefully it isn't too expensive, but if it is, there's no harm in asking if they do reduced rates.>thatd be very nice to doI also live far away from my family. I don't dislike them or anything, but I'd be lying if I said I didn't appreciate the peace and quiet.
gonna eep in a bit so replying before i forget>>84510783heya officeanonif you exlcude what i said in that thread im alr, i think i finally beat the feverwbu wassup>>84509301im chilling in bed on on my puter for most of the time so yeah good thing i was doing iti wonder how ill distract myself when everything currently is boring but oh well ill find something>>84509838hi cat nah i think it has mostly passed, ive got slight hypothermia instead of fever so i should be better i thinkthought ill try to monitor it as much as i cangood night everyone
