Broken heart editionFriendly reminder:- Dont ask for medical advice. (Go see a doctor you dummy)- No vaccine discussion. (Maybe just a little bit)- Premed opinions are to be promptly discarded (Ur a bunch of retards)
> Hanging at da spot with muhniggas (the ER)> Ayo dis nigga cant breathe> Administer furosemide, hydrocortisone and salbutamol/ipratropium> Refer to specialist if dat yt devil shit dont workIts all so tiresome
Why is the medical field (not docs spefically) so hoighty-toity? We stick to this archaic system of training our medical professions where there's only 1 path to each profession in the field. Why are there no training programs to turn Nurses and PAs into full physicians, for example? And no, nurse practitioner is not the same.Honestly I think the whole field has a stick up its ass and prefers there to be fewer physicians.
>What do you guys think of sonic disassociation?
>>16916301You ever watched the pit? Tiresome how thode hollywood bums glaze them retards at the ER.
>>16916351>Main ER doc is a Jew>Everyone is brown or "diverse" >Every non-jew white man is retarded and incompetent>DEI shit everywhere>le COVID PTSDWhy the fuck do people like this Frankfurt School slop? Americans must hate themselves beyond repair
>>16916351Better than glazing the retards in gensurge
>had a severe humerus fracture>socialized healthcare country so I was given fast surgical treatment with the best care no questions asked>look up online, amerimutts treat this fracture with conservative treatment that involves the arm immobilized for 10 months>meanwhile me after a month can live by myself with no arm cast, will return to job in another month>a fat butthurt amerilard got mad that I was "glazing an expensive surgical procedure"Land of the Free, Home of the Brave AHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA>>16916301maybe nigga had a pulmonary embolism, hope you checked D-dimers
>>16916407who cares about your country lol
/med/anons, I wish to lay down a medical scenario, taken straight out of a recent episode of a popular series.An adult, male, between late 30s to early 40s has suffered a grievous blow to the back of the head, among other minor injuries. The man was wearing a helmet, but was not adjusted to his own head size.Can he be saved with our current-day medical techniques?
>>16916421picrel is how the victim got his main injury.
>>16916304The knowledge and skill base of an RN is so wildly different, that even if you were to accept the strawman that physicians don't remember organic chemistry, etc. in their day to day work, it would require an immense amount of training to meaningfully teach the knowledge used in differential diagnosis. The whole NP ecosystem in the US specifically exists because most NPs don't want do the actual training and education to become a physician, hence their lobbying campaign for equivalence.
>>16916424>>16916421a fractured cranium? that can healor we could give him a cap of plastic or metal
>>16916471Sometimes it doesn't even need to heal. I've heard of one guy who took like 6 months to be diagnosed with a basilar skull fracture after going to the doctor with a runny nose.Public healthcare btw
>>16916304in my country doctors / physicians unironically induce artificial scarcity to allow them to demand higher wages in private and public healthcare positions.no i will not elaborate as i simply can't be bothered to show how this is done.
>8 hr shift>followed by 2 hours of simulation >4 hours of library revision>and a 2 hour drive homenothing better than blasting some oldschool death metal after a long day of helping no one and feeling like a utter retard for deciding to PAY to study medicine
>>16916542Theres no way you were productive that whole time.
>>16916547He did say he helped no one
>>16916547absolutely not. it took me two hours to answer a single question about the neuronal signaling mechanisms of the sigmoid colon, after which i blanked out completely and essentially stared at a textbook wanting to cry.
Any pathologyChads ITT?
>>16916564yeah, i look at something, say its infected, then throw my favorite antibiotic at it.works most of the time ezpz
>>16916595What is the second-line option
>>16916299you guys wanna hear something crazy? every night I go to sleep, if I do nothing, I'm nearly falling asleep and a super strong single heart beat wakes me up, to counter this I have to do running on my run, like I just jog without moving just moving my legs and my body, I do like 4 or 5 sprints, that removes the disturbing heart beat from my sleep
>>16916612Whoa....
>>16916615what? I self medicate this way
>>16916564I want to apply to pathology.
>>16916421Can he be kept alive? If hes close enough to a NCx team and an ICU hes got a decent shot at probably maybe making it.Will his brain perform enough of its functions to carry on and live what you would consider a worthy life? Very likely not but maybe yes.
>>16916471>>16916507That's good to hear, of how resilient our bodies can be (at least for a while) in spite of such trauma.>>16916650Hmm, I see.So it would seem to be essential how fast the injury was addressed, but even then side-effects would be hard to avoid.
>>16916669Btw, thank you for indulging on my question. A few anons have been inquiring on this matter for a few days, at the /tv/ board.Compliments from /got/hotd/dunk/ general.
>>16916609death i guess
Can my doctor tell what is wrong with me by smelling my farts?For example if I bring farts in to the appointment with me in a jar can he smell them to tell me?
i hate when a patient makes it a point to say theyre a lawyer. are they looking for me to fuck up so they can sue me, or do they just want me to pull out every test to make sure nothing is wrong?
>>16916857they're making you aware their observations may be off baseline as they have no pulse duh
>>16916304>Why are there no training programs to turn Nurses and PAs into full physicians, for example?Same reason there's no training programs to turn construction workers into engineers
>tfw the acutely bleeding abdomen is so bad you can actually see the fat lady's abs
>>16916857They're making you aware that every word out of their mouth is a lie
Porn and loving politicians is a public health crisis and I refuse to be quiet any longer. Why do gooners and gomers get the right to vote? Why do women? What a cursed world. Woe to all men everywhere. Fucking HR girlies too. This adult daycare with benefits needs to end. I look forward to the coming judgement of the living and the dead.
>go to library to revise anatomy since ADHD demon will absolutepy refuse to focus at home>library has got a new 'open plan' redesign since last visit>literal screaming and crying children everywhere>go back home after 1 hour and half a page of noteswhen did this happen ?i thought the library was a place of quiet study, not a gosh darn nursery !
>>16916542That is proper death metal alright. Shame on their recent shit.
>>16917022those kids must have ADHD and need meth
>>16916669Craneal fracture is probably the least of your worries in that scenario. That brain has sustained massive forces with some initial deterioration of consciousness followed by sudden fall into a coma. Somethings probably bleeding and the brain is going to develop edema sooner than later. Initial life support, a CT scan, probably emergent neurosurgery (at the discretion of the neurosurgeon), and neuro-critical care measures are in order. Read about the Monro-Kellie doctrine, its interesting stuff. End results will most likely include some degree of neurological impairment ranging from comatous states to some kind of focal lesion (blindness, loss of strenght/feeling/speech etc.)At first glance looks pretty grim but one does get surprised by brains sometimes
>>16916299Is it me or does everyone hate doctors in the USA now? It's like I'm becoming a doctor at the time where the profession is the least trusted and most hated.
I'm expecting a resounding no, but I thought it'd be interesting to ask.Does anyone have any positive experiences with homeopathy?I've known some dyed-in-the-wool skeptics who insist it's all rubbish but then also reluctantly admit that they've seen success -somehow- when it comes to allergy symptoms.>>16916304>Honestly I think the whole field has a stick up its ass and prefers there to be fewer physicians.The AMA and Congress limit the number of doctors, so yeah they objectively do.>>16916650>Will his brain perform enough of its functions to carry on and live what you would consider a worthy life? Very likely not but maybe yes.Entirely dependent upon the severity of the injury. There are people who get shot in the head and recover with no ill effects at all, and others who get shot in the head and die.
>>16916816Dogs can be trained to detect cancer in humans via smell alone.This is partially due to the fact that dogs aren't very good listeners and tune people out when they describe their symptoms to them.
>>16916617What kind?Either way do it. Enjoy laughing at clinicians and being able to sleep in your own bed (or wherever else you choose to be) every night for the rest of your career.Unless you choose haem. But in that case you did it to yourself and I don't feel sorry for you.
>>16917325>Does anyone have any positive experiences with homeopathy?haha no, it is on the same tier of chakra healing
>>16917263not everyone, but doctors going more into politica certainly has soured people on the profession somewhat.social media doesnt help either.
I should have been a blacksmith making prop armor for rennaisance fairs and t.v. shows.
>>16917395you and me anonbeing a carpenter is also pretty cool
>>16917263indian CEO doctor lawyer here.i am the most respected person in my neighborhood and all the white women love me. i get so much bob and vagene daily.
>>16917387>social media doesnt help either.all these women, especially minority women, can't help but post all this bullshit on social media, i see it constantly. they make medicine look so unserious. its such a joke.
>>16917263>be me>academic researcher>share scientific journal article during covid>banned for misinformationDoctors are hated now (for health reasons) for the same reason priests were hated for sexual misconduct reasons (despite statistically still being the least likely group to offend): people have expectations and react badly when they're betrayed.Not to mention the whole opioid pandemic was directly due to doctors prescribing pills to people who had no business having them, and other such issues.And let's not forget>Medical malpractice is estimated to cause between 250,000 to 440,000 deaths annually in the United States, making it one of the leading causes of death in the country.
>>16917636>I am a doctor who never failed to heal a patient (also veterinarian) but the fuckin gov't forced me on witness protection over this epstein say & so i can't work.>epstein tried to recruit me and left me a message @ his downfall
>>16917636People freaked out during COVID because their selfishness and pigheadedness overran the sense of common decency to preserve the public interest.The opioid epidemic was directly driven by misinformation from Sackler and Co on oxycontin's addiction using subtly botched studies. Not to mention that turn of the century Americans got a lot older and very unhealthy (leading them to surgeries or other major medical conditions) while not having the wherewithal to stop bitching about pain. When the HMO and your employer (since healthcare "reforms" have made it extremely difficult to run an independent primary care practice anymore) are breathing down your neck to solve the problem within 10-15 mins as cheap as possible and the patient with a known source of pain comes in with zero desire to undergo any treatments that might target the root cause of their pain with knowledge of an Oxycontin ad, it becomes really hard to deny the patient (if you do, your job is at stake because the "patient satisfaction" scores that your employer tracks will be in the toilet.The real cause of the absolute wildfire of the opioid epidemic in the 90s-10s was the same as meth and crack before that, poverty and resulting social determinants of health lead to unhealthy people (mentally and physically) and absolutely mind-numbingly boring hellholes. But of course, building an equitable system is something no greedy capitalist will ever discuss.
>>16917674Wigger, did you just type «social determinants of health» in this thread? I'm going to punch your mouth
>>16917723>t.
>>16917723love u anon
It should not be legal for psychiatrists to forcibly drug patientsIf you want to lock me up then fine. Put me in a padded room. I'm fine with that. What I don't want is poisonous, mind-altering lab chemicals injected into my muscles against my will.
>>16917723the most important social determinant is ohana. that means family :)
future indian med student CEO doctor here.how do i get a hot blonde nurse to treat my penis if it hurts?
What causes a change in response to alcohol? Ever since the covid lockdowns, I feel like my body and metabolism have slowly changed. I'm generally an extremely inconsistent and light drinker - I'll have a couple of beers when I go out randomly and then go many months without any alcohol. I've started to notice that I don't really get buzzed anymore and nothing beyond that. I _may_ get a headache. I had like 4-5 shots of rum today (again, after not drinking for many months) and nothing happened. I'm perfectly coherent, not even buzzed. I don't have any other effects outside of disappointment.What's wrong w/ me bros
>>16917952lmao this comic is so out of toucha nursoid would instantly call/page the resident if there was new testicular pain. they wouldn't bother examining. it's beyond their scope of practice
>>16918126Maybe in a westoid hospital.
give it to me straight audiologist/ENTbros, how fucked are my ears?t. have been using headphones at way too loud of volumes for the past 5 - 10 years
>>16917263I've been gravely ill every few days for a couple years now and they never took it seriously so I have lost all hope in them. They don't even like their jobs anyway
>>16918357>gravely ill>never ends up in a gravelol. do you rate mild headaches as 10/10 pain?
>>16918609>mild"Mild" is not the word I would use
>>16918609>>16918615And that is to say, the word I would use is "gravely"
>>16917952I need a nursing handjob real bad right now. >how do i get a hot blonde nurse to treat my penis if it hurts?The blonde delinquent nurse is top tier.
What are the /med/ approved fetishes? I like nursing handjobs and lactation.
>>16918626Washing hands with soap and water before touching each other's genitals really gets me going.
Is genital herpes usually asymptomatic like Chlamydia is?
>>16918626Peeing after sexual intercourse
Why are so many nurses so fucking awful? There's a handful of rockstars but god damn what happened where so many have no idea what they're doing?
>>16918626I like footjobs and cocaine at the strip club. Top 5 hardest woods of my life.
>>16916857they're making you aware that they are the superior being, with only Hollywood movie producer trumping you both
>>16918626handholding, missionary, impregnation
>>16918626armpits are the most /med/ fetish
>>16918626my mom was a nurse so it always grossed me out as a fetish.personally my weirdest one is female vampire yuri, especially biting.
>>16918692degredation of training programmes ?my country devised a new compact route to registration which is only 2 years instead of the classical 4 and there's no way you can train someone to be a competent medical professional in such a short span of time.
>>16918626everything outside paediatrics is approved
My fetish is the renewal of Christendom, retaking Jerusalem, purging it, and getting a young fertile wife to bear 20 children. Never tried it, but I bet it's absolutely grand. Why do you all have weird fetishes? You know one paraphilia predicts another.
>Christendom
>>16919700i bet youre the type of faggot to say judeo-christianity
why were there so many complications with the covid vaccine compared to the annual flu shot?
Give me the rundown on Big 4 NYC programs. Are they as workhorse as they say? I don't mind working hard as long as it's not toxic. Is anesthesia better in this regard?
I'm losing all hope with radiography right now. 1st year student, 2 months in, we're on upper extremities. We have a pretest with unlimited tries for upper extremity image analysis. I just cannot score higher than 63%. I don't know what I'm doing wrong. I don't get to see what answers I got correct or not, so there's no feedback for improvement to try again. I'm wondering if this is the wrong path to take, now. This is an important skill to be able to determine if images are worth keeping and sending or not and it's been a terrible struggle this entire time. Otherwise, nothing else is really difficult because the rest is so much more objective. It's when I have to look at more subjective images, not 100% perfect, and determine certain things about them, which is seeming impossible with this pretest. I spent 3 hours on the last attempt, it's 14 questions, I used 2 textbooks and thought I had every answer rigorously worked out.Anyone else relate?
>>16920115>redditography
>>16920115sucks to be low IQ anon, you can still become a nurse
>>16920207I've tested in the 130s during a professional evaluation. I'm starting to think the test is wrong, now.
>>16920212I read your wall of text again imo I only deal with ultrasound images but thinking 2 textbooks are enough to train is sillygrind radiopediagrind random books that showcase whatever image method you studygo on ER or ortho wardsI promise you this is not rocket science
>>16920115Study more and employ a systematic aproach to image interpretation. There is a book called accident & emergency radiology which i like.I can probably manage to get a PDF if u want Im no radiologist tho and for anything not a chest/abd rx i will shamelessly call a traumatologist when in doubt.
>>16920253>>16920286Just found out a bit ago that everyone in class did terribly on that particular quiz. That tells us that the quiz is the problem, not us. I think we're going to get extra credits handed to us for what a complete dumpster fire it was.
>>16920115>This is an important skill to be able to determine if images are worth keeping and sending or not and it's been a terrible struggle this entire time.Didn't even know y'all get trained in this because I have seen mountains and mountains of dogshit CXRs just in the past month that we've been treating a single patient getting 1-3 CXRs daily. Somehow you all fuck up the exposure so it's never equal, the patient is never positioned properly despite literally being paralyzed so there's no excuse, there's always some kind of terrible artifacting, etc. etc.>>16920339It just means that everybody in your program is retarded. Sorry dude, but rad techs are not the brightest in the bunch
why would you ever become anything besides an ophthalmologist? just roll in the easy peasy dough especially if you become a retinal specialist.
why are there so many indian women at my medical school and why are they so mean + cringe + ethnocentric
Wellbutrin or lexapro?
If you want a good laugh, I encourage you to watch the music video for this terrible song.https://youtu.be/Yv97b2oPk3w?si=d7CIYby9CiRXz2x3>>16920643they're hunting for a caucazoid to impregnate them duh
effective way to get high score on step 2?
>accidentally revealed my power level to a patientI cant manage to just shut the fuck up.
>>16920925what did you do / say ?
>>16920811I'm a fat fuck and that makes me depressedI honestly need to start Wellbutrin maxxing
>>16920594in my country, it is so competitive you need a PhD.I'd rather just be an anaesthetist instead and do eye blocks all day instead
What specialty should I choose as an alcoholic
>here's 200 competencies you need to get signed off little man>oh btw, heres only 90 hours of shift time between march and mid april to do it in>oh, and dont forget, absolutely NO OVERTIMEthis is pretty gay.
>>16920811Prescribing Lexapro should be banned on pain of death and whoever discovered Wellbutrin should be awarded a Nobel prize.
>>16921783
>>16921783just fake them lol
>>16921678In my country at least, you go into family medicine, establish yourself at some poor shit rural clinic, and then go home and drink while your interns hold the fort. What are they gonna do, fire you? Lmao
>>16921783It gets WORSE from med school???
Future of Canadian biology studies
>>16920925>>16920954I'm curious as well. I just about spilled my spaghetti a few days ago when we got a pretty female patient around my age with giant breasts. The outlines in the thin gown had me stuttering and almost forgetting to ask some patient history questions. I'm not a virgin and have had bigger on a partner, but still, ones in that size range short-circuit my brain every time.
>forensic pathology department is 80-90% women >I'm the only white moid there I have never in my life seen a department with this level of female predominance. Not in obgyn, psych, pediatrics, anything. I knew women love true crime but damn watching a tiny 4'11 girl cheerfully pulling intestines out of a body teaches you a lot about the nature of existence.
Why are foid surgeons such whores?
>>16916299How do you medfags remember all the medications? The names are bizzarre, there's like a 100 of these for each specialist, each with their own restrictions, dosage and shit. Do you spam flashcards every day?
>>16922103Don't know about others, but being a former pill popper was beneficial for remembering medication names, even non-narcotic ones. I found this to be a thing in my former social circle, lol. When the brain is motivated to learn, the rest comes naturally.
>>16922103There's only 3 different names you have to remember for most medications anon its not that hard.
>>16921976Sounds like the that I rotated in a pediatric hospital. Some of the patients were good looking adolescents, the kind of girls that smelled my autismo and were condescending to me in hs. Those fucking skanks still think they are better than me. Dropped my spaghetti multiple times.
>>16922086Because they see men as sources of abuse and develop psychiatric complexes dealing with this
>>16922103truth is you memorize them all for school, then forget all the ones that aren't used in your specialty, ones that aren't very common in general, and ones that don't have significant side effects or future complications.
>>16919930Hope you're ready to do all the scut, also you will be the nursoids bitch. Expect an overweight Shanisha to nag you about bullshit at the worst times. Said nurse will also always go on break when you need to get labs or do anything with a patient. Depending on where you work your patients will either be spics and blacks who cant speak a word of English or entitled kikes who want concierge level medicine.
>>16921976You understand that if you ever fuck up like this again and people notice you're going to lose your license right? I don't think you should be taking anything but geriatric cases anymore
Had anyone ever met an introvert or geeky nurse before? I don't think they exist, they're all the Stacy types in various stages of reformation
>>16922389Nurses are turbonormies. Those nurses yer lookin for are a dime in a dozen.
People at my school admire my work ethic so much that they get concerned when I don't show up and study. Thanks, bros, I needed that :)
>>16922433>admireAre you sure that's the right word?
>>16922388Not sure if trolling or totally asexual.
>>16922103Nigga i have a phone in my pocket
without medfags I'd be dead and wouldn't have to suffer through life. fuck all of you and have a nice day
>>16923049Does your life suck because you don't have money? If so, become a medfag and learn to love life as you make more than other people in your life and are therefore better than everyone around you.
>>16922819Ay i got a glock in my rari
>"if you are going to fuck someone on the med team, just make sure it's not done in a power imbalance">actual advice given to med students todayumm, how about not just fucking your advisors out of, you know, professionalism ? can you really not go a 2 month placement without having to bang someone ?
>>16922103>90% of people are going to have the same handful of meds that work for most issues >med's have classes anyway, if yuo see -olol or -pril, -cilin, -statin, you will have a inclining to what it is>what are the handbooks and online resources or even apps that list medical guidelines and appropriate drug prescriptions that everyone uses anyway
>>16923316for normalfags, if they go a month without sex they think theyre virgins again
I'm a khhv. People think I'm gay because I've never had a girlfriend.
>>16923316In my intern group there was this chick who left her trad homesteader Chad husband and started fucking the female anesthesiologist who was like 20-30 years older than her. They didn't even try to hide or downplay it. Bitches be whack.
>>16923333"suck dick for sign off's" has been a thing for ages.one of the managers in my department got forced retirement for suggesting a female nursing student come round his house to review her development portfolio and that she should wear something sexy.im just pissed off that even a female healthcare worker would not advise against fucking the people on your placement rotation.
Any tips removing dark spots from skins after recovering (actually, while having) from tinea versicolor (not sure if it is or the other one, due to scratching it alot and leaving wounds. I finally went to doctor and got me medicine, but while it dries and not itchy anymore, it still has very dry (rather)dark spots, like flex or whatever . What's recommended to, remove these post treatment scar, I suppose?
>>16923429tretinoin
>>16922433Do you take the horse to school or hospital? Please let me know as soon as possible thank you for this attention to this matter!!
>>16923356Well, the girl I'm talking about was still scissoring with her anesthesiologist mommy months after she finished her anesthetics rotation. It's funny because if it was a young woman and an older man he would've had an avalanche of shit come down on him, but of course because it was two women everyone just kind of quietly let it slide.
>>16923556I just bring my racehorse plushies to school to study with me. I think they're fun to look at.
>>16923634show us their backsides :)
>>16923635I have more horses in the back of my car and I like to imagine they're having a fun time watching the scenery whenever I drive.
Ah. Whatev.
Holy fucking autismo
>>16923643cute
always a good day when i get the new review of optometry magazine
U know the residents be fucking at night brother
>>16916299I know I shouldn't ask medical advice here but I wonder if I should visit my family doctor for what I suspect to be fat malabsorption. I have been feeling symptoms for 3 weeks now. Is there anything he can do to find what's going on or prescribe something to help me? Or should I change diet for a week and see what happens?
watching first episode of Pitt and it is lowkey fire.Yeah too many brownoids but whatever>>16922389the younger ones some of therm>>16923316you are an incel, you would not get it>>16923863isn't optometry a solved field? what are they jerking off to in their magazines>>16923983celiac/crohn's disease/chronic pancreatitis/pancreatic cancerdon't @ at me eosinophilic gastroenteritis
has anyone read any interesting papers or case studies lately? what journals do you all like?
For me? The BJA.
>>16924072>have comminuted fracture>still not healed after 6 weeks>hmmm wonder what I can take to speed up the bone healing>enter https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC10720763/>but it literally makes you smell like a curry indian if you take ittoo bad
>>16923643you are either a chick or a feminine looking asian man (with a cute, small pp), no man studying medicine is this gay. >>16924072I was reading a college of paramedics journal about perceptions of elderly patients that i found interesting but be real, who is reading journals in their spare time for fun ?
>>16924177>but be real, who is reading journals in their spare time for fun ?I did many years ago when I was in the engineering field before recently going back to college for medicine.
>>16924177>who is reading journals in their spare time for fun ?yeah haha imagine being such a loser haha
>>16924177>you are either a chick or a feminine looking asian man (with a cute, small pp), no man studying medicine is this gay.I'm a very sensitive young man.
>>16924011>isnt optometry solvedabout as much as ophthalmology lol. are you even a doctor?
>>16924329You just give people glasses let's be realAnd even then 90% of the process is driven by the patient
>>16916299I have been drinking raw milk for approximately 1 month. 8 gallons of bovine titty squeeze and I am not dead. Am I a super human medically speaking.
>>16924072I check the one and only critical care reviews each morning while taking my morning shit
Do optometrists in america think they are anything but the lowliest ancillary personnel?On par with nurse auxiliaries or rx techniciansgedafuckouttahere
>>16924352Not necessarily, you're just playing an idiotic lottery game and the RNG will eventually wreck your shit.
>>16924011>celiac/crohn's disease/chronic pancreatitis/pancreatic cancerYou sound like a 1st year med student. Is anyone here even a real doctor? I know it's probably fat malabsorption because it started after I ate a shit ton of butter for the first time in my life and my feces are oily and yellow. I just wanna know if it's worth going to the doctor because it's not practical for me to visit him. If I tell him it's fat malabsorption, what would he do? Just tell me what Google Gemini already did? No exams or drug prescription? Because then I just wasted my time.
>>16924494>I tell him it's fat malabsorption, what would he do?We can't tell you that because we're not going to waste our time and education taking a professional history for free. We're also not able to do a physical exam on you or order labs. So you're going to have to decide on your own the risk benefit analysis of potentially dying of a condition that your crapGPT AI garbage threw out as a diagnosis or catching it earlyChoice is yours, have fun
>>16924494>You sound like a 1st year med studentsince I'm medical staff, my (much more) noble soul will not throw back an insult at (You)but as the other anon said, without a physical exam, detailed history and some bloodwork, asking medical advice on the internet is uselessyou are the textbook reason for why non-medical peasants should not come here for medical advice
>self-medicating with research chemicalsam i every doc's worst nightmare?
>>16924562I'd be excited to welcome you into my practice as long as I can write about your journey. I won't answer a single damn question though. Mad scientist type patients are profoundly captivating for me.>>16924494I diagnose you with broken pooper. That'll be 1,000 grams of . 9999 silver please
>>16924011>The PitLe COVID PTSD XD
>>16924625>I'd be excited to welcome you into my practice as long as I can write about your journey. I won't answer a single damn question though. Mad scientist type patients are profoundly captivating for methis would actually be the ideal set up for me, i hope more doctors share your perspective as i wouldn't mind a sympathetic mind willing to e.g. order tests. imo if you have answers for me for what i'm doing then i shouldn't be taking it
>>16924562What's your favorite research chemical? Mine is phenylpiracetam. Research chemicals aside, my favorite drug is modafinil. I'm surprised it's not more popular.
>>16924664currently taking two: an n-cyclopropyl derivative of pemiline and a 4'-dimethyl derivative of tropoflavin. the former is supposedly a stimulant, but based on its characteristics, i think it is more likely an NDRI akin to buproprion, with a much, much stronger dopamine component. i use it to deal with motivational/anticipatory anhedonia that has plagued me increasingly into my 20s. it is my fav because it makes life richer.the other is much strengthened TrkB agonism, which counteracts some of the former's side effects (false shortness of breath) and also has insane potential for behavior modification, wgen i'm on it regularly it gets me to the point of picking up habits within a week, very double edged sword
Does it take longer to grade the internal medicine shelf compared to the other ones? I took it last friday and I still don't have it back.I know its technically still within the acceptable time frame but my school has been very consistent about giving results by thursday at noon or earlier in the past.
>>16924342>just give people glassesyeah, and ophthalmologists view glasses as beneath them and then all the patients bitch about how shitty their glasses are since they had some 16yo technician randomly spin some dials and call it good enough.i actually view sight as important.>>16924374>in americabeing that you won't even capitalize America, i imagine you're from some thirdworld shithole.
>>16924177>who is reading journals in their spare time for funI have to be up in 5 hours, I have literally no reason to stay awake whatsoever, and yet I'm looking through slavshit medical journals to try and find interesting forensic med articles about combat deaths in Ukraine. You underestimate my power (level).
>>16924646If it's research based answers you want, then go to your public library, get a log in thing, and they all usually have access to research journals. So you can get cutting edge papers on the topic that way, for free, since SciHub is dead. Take notes and keep track of citations. If you're a well-read patient, I can't imagine a doc who wouldn't be interested. Maybe the money mongers, but nobody else. >>16924664SERMs and SARMs interest me. I'd like to know if SARMs can replace testosterone therapy so we can Rx test levels without worrying about typical test SEs
>>16924494>I ATE A LOT OF FAT AND MY SHIT IS FATTYI diagnose you with mouthbreathing and mental retardation t. doctor
>>16924747monkey
>>16924822
>>16924494Fat malabsorption isn't a diagnosis retard. The staff doctor gave a good differential of causes of fat malabsorption. To work that up to find the cause and appropriately treat it, you need to go to a doctor.
Any psychiatrist? How do you ddx cPTSD/Trauma, Anxiety, Depression, ADHD?
i have a research questionnow what do i doim preclinical and at a do school. i want to do this prospective research study idea but i have no idea where to go
>>16923983what is your stool like?
>>16925236You go online, find a psychiatrist near you or online, talk with them about your symptoms, and they use their decade of schooling to begin the process of diagnosing your psychiatric illness
Is ADHD even real? Seems like a convenient excuse to not do shit. I don't want to study either.
I'm curious, how do you guys deal with the big meme disorders like fibromyalgia, ME/CFS, POTS, EDS, etc? I'm not talking about patients who meet some kind of actual existing clinical criteria, I mean the 20something woman with a long string of normal labs who spends all day bedrotting and eating garbage and then goes looking on tiktok for an explanation for why she doesn't feel good when she does finally get up.
well, which is it?
i really fucking hate this and i want to go back. how the fuck did society let this happen
>>16925475medicine used to be intelligent, dead serious white men and now its 4'11 indian girlies for whom everything is a big fucking joke
>>16925427>eh im not seeing anything that would lead me to that conclusion today. go bother your PCP instead of me.
>>16925427God, I worked with one of these zoomers for like a month before she just stopped showing up. Also had "autism and a couple personality disorders". Beyond that stupid shit, she was actually likeable and learned the job quickly, but whatever.
>>16925467let it run over the patient. im not a cuckold that will sacrifice a loved one for some random nobody.
>>16925619You're not a good doctor.
>>16925303Ask chatGPT i wouldnt knowI despise that shit so much i am not offered to "partake" in research anymore (aka work for free for some 0 impact bullshit). Sorry haha im not answering emails hehe whops
>>16925770I agree. Most research is meaningless.
>>16925643in a hypothetical scenario where i have to let a tram ran over either a loved one or a random patient, i suppose you are correct. luckily, these scenarios don't happen frequently.
>>16925236none of those are real, schizophrenia and psychotic episodes are the only real diseases in psych
>>16925475to be fair the guys in that upper pic didn't had anything good to work withno imagingno relevant medicationlot of circlejerking over snake oil and just watching patients die
>>16926017>lot of circlejerking over snake oil and just watching patients dieStill lots of that today with with our supposed landmark studies of the past 40 years. ARDSnet is complete bullshit in reality
You have been randomized into the "fuck your lungs arm"! Whoa how lucky haha sowwyy hehe
Why do so many people in medical school take anti-depressants? I'd estimate that around 30-40% of my class is taking them. As an aside, what happens if you take anti-depressants if you're not depressed? Would the dopamine reuptake inhibition make you have an elevated mood?
>>16926376excess dopamine accumulation within the cranial cavity is well known to stimulate the mitochondrion (the powerhouse of the cell !) within testicular tissue via the vagus nerve, simultaneously increasing the intra-cellular pressure of your scrotum until it explodes.
>>16926568
>>16922359>Expect an overweight Shanisha to nag you about bullshit at the worst timesI go to school in the South, I have a certain charm that gets these kinds of nurses to do what I need to do. It's called asking nicely which most residents are unironically too spergy to do in my opinion>Depending on where you work your patients will either be spics and blacks who cant speak a word of English or entitled kikes who want concierge level medicine.This is also my entire patient care experience in clinicals I think I'm going to love nyc
>>16926376women and faggots
Is /med/ interested in gene therapy?
>>16916299Did you know?
>>16926017I wish I could have experienced the crazy retarded Wild West bullshit of old timey med school. Getting my face covered in dueling scars and microdosing strychnine to study better and shit.
>>16924801>I'd like to know if SARMs can replace testosterone therapy so we can Rx test levels without worrying about typical test SEsno"selective androgen receptor modulator" implies that it does what an androgen does, selectivelyat physiologic dosages, you're not going to get adverse events in meaningful numbers from test. suppression will happen with literally anything androgenic because there are multiple redundant pathways to mediate androgens>>16924664modafinil is quite possibly one of the most important chemicals available. It's a shame it's controlled, but flmodafinil and adrafinil are still great. It's a shame that if I take flmodafinil for too long I start to get angina>>16922103people I don't like get rapamycin, people I do like get sirolimus >>16918115you're getting stiffed at the barwhat you're describing isn't physically possible unless you're eating an absolute shitton of food beforehand and getting severely watered-down boozenuke your liver with two percocets then drink>>16926376>what happens if you take anti-depressants if you're not depressed?flat affect and retardationanti-depressants aren't mood-elevators, they're mood stabilizers. Most people on anti-depressants are philosophical zombies. A lot of them have not come to terms with the fact that they'll dump hundreds of thousands of dollars and 15 years into their life into what will most likely be a clerical position dealing with sick retards. Medicine was better when, like engineering, it was filled with psychotic autists who would do it even without being paid to. DRIs do elevate mood, which is why modafinil is such a spectacular drug, it's an alertness aid and atypical DRI with a bizarrely good pharmacologic profile.
Thinking about going into psychiatry after medschool because of the chill lifestyle. Does anyone here have experiences? Did you feel like you actually helped your patients?
>>16926740I'm not a psychiatrist but my own psychiatrist is a depressed incel who in every one of our sessions subtly hints that he's got nothing in his life but work and nobody to come home to but his dogs. Gives me my wellbutrin though so I'm not complaining.
What would be the go to studying books for pre-med students (I wanna be a doctor now)
>>16927033books for whatever classes youre in now, so you dont have a shit GPA
>>16926719Talk more about modafinil, please. I'd love to hear your thoughts on it. Anything you can think of, really: the positives, downsides, what you use it for, etc.
>>16927033Gray's Anatomy (the book, not the TV show)Hurst's The Heart anatomy is the foundation of all medicine, if you don't know anatomy like the back of your hand, you'll be functionally useless. Even if you don't become a doctor, it'll be extremely helpful. If you actually want to be good at medicine, pick a topic, get a browser extension to sort by impact factor, and put your selected topic into google scholar and start reading journals. The most brilliant people I know just do self-directed research all day. Pre-med is a retard filter. Passing pre-med is a question of how well you take tests, how well you write, and how much shit you're willing to wade through without being paid to. >>16927081modafinil is worthy of being called next-gen simply because it is ridiculously effective at producing a very narrow band of desirable effects with minimal side effects and adverse events. Having taken adderall in various doses I'm not sure how some people cope with being on the doses that they're on because an XR would give me manic episode level energy but also make me feel like I was running my life clock out at triple speed for hours. Moda is clean speed; no euphoria either so it's very good for work. adrafinil is the produg version of modafinil available without a prescription. It works exactly the same, the only drawback is that you're running a debt on your liver because any prodrug is being metabolized thereflmodafinil is the bisfluoro version of modafinil and in my experience has about twice the potency. 170mg flmodafinil + 40mg noopept + 200mg centrophenoxine was my cocktail of choice for six months of launching a Class III device in the EU and about the closest thing I have experienced to the "limitless" pill. The only side effect from this for me was worsening my bruxism, and the only adverse event I started to have was idiopathic angina/precordial catch around month 5.
>>16927086I appreciate the lengthy and detailed response, thank you. Moda really is the best.
>>16916299when do we get the cure to all disease?
Psychiatry is immoral.If I really do become a danger to others (as unlikely as I think that is) then put me in a padded room for a while. I think that's a reasonable measure.What is immoral is when patients are forcibly drugged. Society realised a while ago that forced feeding is immoral. Forced drugging is very similar; you're still using force to put substances into a person's body against their will. Antipsychotics have some shitty side effects (distressing muscle spasms, anxiety, shrinking the brain). Why should a doctor have the right to inflict those side effects on a patient against their will?
thinking of that stupid tiktok influencer student being lynched by an e-mob as we speak and then thinking of multiple attendings of mine who'd say 10x worse shit daily
>>16927860?
>>16927860Yeah but they don't broadcast it to a live tiktok audience of several million goobersThat guy is not matching outside an HCA tier shithole, when people look up his name they'll instantly see this stuff - that is if he doesn't get straight up expelled by mayo
>>16928051Is this /Auer fascist/???
>>16927086>an XR would give me manic episode level energy but also make me feel like I was running my life clock out at triple speed for hoursI'm curious what dosage you were taking. amphetamines have never done much of anything for me so i don't bother with them.you should have a look at creatine if you haven't already btw. low cost and zero risks.
Today im going to hand my renounce letter so I can leave my residency spot. Im 4 years deep in a 5y critical care programFuck this shit so much, i choose my life.
>>16928078What are you going to do now? Are you American? If so, what are you going to do about the debt?Fuck medicine!
>>16928079Im European, so I have 0 debt and around 50k euro in savings. Im going to apply for the national residency exam again and hopefully choose a specialty that doesnt make me absolutely miserable.Actually love medicine and helping people whenever i can, but not at this cost. My life sucks dick rn, i barely sleep and I am isolating myself more and more. I am probably clinically depressed. I am away from my real friends and family. I have kept going for the sole reason of not being a pussy and not fucking my mates over (they will have to cover my 24h shifts) but fuck It, i tap. No more.
>>16928080Best of luck bro, I hope things get better for you.
>>16928082Thanks brah. Ill keep going until may so I dont throw a nuke on the april calendar but im feeling good about leaving.I am determined to be happy and this is just not It.
>>16928085You're probably going to hear criticism over your choice if you haven't heard it already but I think it takes courage to change course like that, honestly. I knew a guy that worked in EM for a couple of years and he was absolutely burnt out. I don't know if EM is a thing or not in Europe but EM is so shit in America, you have to have a certain personality to deal with it. Anyways, he went back to do a psych residency and I think he's happier now.Also, I think it's better to make that change instead of getting older and being resentful over what could have been. Again, best of luck, bro.
>>16928085i agree with >>16928086. takes a lot of balls to switch your path when you could just keep going on the same route even if you absolutely hate it. cutting losses can be tough.good luck in the future friend :)
>>16928086Critical care the closest to an EM residency here i think, as the actual ER is staffed by forced labor (family med residents lol).I work in a hostile environment and people here can be snakes so honestly fuck em, they can think whatever they want.I have learnt a lot, made a bunch of money and fucked my fair share, so It is not lost time. Wish yall niggas the bestwagmi
Told the man about me leaving, It went okay.He tried to guilt trip me a bit about leaving before a vacation period but i hinted at getting sick leave (muh depression) and he piped down lmaoGloves off nigga im a free man nowIm going to get high and play billiards with my brotherWish everybody here a merry afternoon and a happy fuck jews
How do I get into research? I can't think of any topic.
why are there like 80 different types of dentist?why are Orthodontists and "Oral Surgeons" not considered dentists even though they work on literally the same shit?why are dentists so flip-floppy when it comes to insurance?why can't I have my teeth checked out AND wisdoms pulled at the same fucking place, on MY insurance?
why are there like 80 different types of medical doctors?why are optometrists and "dentists" not considered medical doctors even though they work on literally the same shit?why are doctors so flip-floppy when it comes to insurance?why can't I have my body checked out AND cataract surgery at the same fucking place, on MY insurance?
don't mock me
How do I tell if I want to do family medicine or general surgery
>>16928412
>>16928364sorry friend
>>16916299I've have this leaky bump on my ass (not my asshole) and over the last few days it's started to hurt like hell when I'm sitting down. Am I gonna die??
>>16928337First of all, surgeons have mental problems. Every one of them. Dentists are doing dentistry only for money. Nobody likes teeth unless you're a fetish haver. So, they divide up the patients' (client's?) needs and all get a slice of the cake. Everyone can do everyone else's job with enough training. A lot of people in healthcare just weren't bullied enough in public school. Likely they didn't ever feel a good punch to the face either. Probably never saw themselves bleed before. No grit.
>>16928080imon I would have pulled through the last year and gotten some comfy high pay job in a private clinicyou need intensive care everywhere
>>16928078So how is unemployment going?
New pitt episode had me in shambles. I relate to mel more than everEven obvious low functioning ASD fegroids get laid more than aspie men and women
Gl on upcoming match day. We are all going to make it. >t. already matched
>>16929632Eyes and penises are not real medicine, just FYI. Moid.
>>16929646Worse, I'm on Uncle Sam's payroll :^)
>>16929664Only the dumbest golems do HPSP in 2026 kek, you are going to die in the sandbox for imperialist warmongers to make their trillions you dumbass
>>16929681Okay, and you're also a zogslave by your own ideology, bitchbaby :^]
>>16928244cold email random PIs. They love delegating grunt work. Learn adobe illustrator and make shitty figures and you can get your name on a bunch of shit no one will read
Saw pjp for the first time this weekInteresting to actually see what an entire chest cavity of ground glass and tree in bud opacities looks like
What's the deal with blastocystis? I seemingly have it (initially thought it was h.pylori but tested negative, then found this) and have been given antibiotics for it, but apparently it's not bad for you.... probably. Unless it is. I was initially desperate to get antibiotics but I don't know if they actually fix this, data seems controversial. Not necessarily looking for advice, just curious what this actually is/if it's actually bad/how treatable it is with anti Bs.
are nurses allowed here?>t. dumb nursefag who wants non-plebbit tier discussion
>>16930057Are you a murse?
>>16930061yes..
>>16930062Bruh.
>>16930063thanks for making me feel like shiti just couldnt afford medschool.anyways are nurses welcome here or nah?
>>16930067>i just couldnt afford medschool.You can take out loans like the rest of us. >anyways are nurses welcome here or nah?Okay, sure. What did you want to discuss?
>>16930068>You can take out loans like the rest of us.he thinks im a burger, lol.>>16930068ok this is for everyone. idk if i should get into the APN route or just get my CPNA. cpna is called differently here but basically become the anesthesiologist nurse. im super unsure. i feel like APNs might get their day in the coming years. but if i get the CPNA i could work 40% (saturdays and sundays) and actually enroll in medschool.superrr undecided though. ive seen my fair share of residents and damn docs do have it fucking tough, man.
>>16930075>he thinks im a burger, lol.Wait, wut? If you're not American, shouldn't medical school just be free for you then?
>>16930077nope.also who covers my living costs?>inb4 stipendstheyre not enough. plus i was too young and had to support my family somehow.nursing just made sense, although i hate bedside care.
>>16930079>nope.I see. I do recall someone in these threads talking about a Mongolian guy in medical school who needed more money to continue schooling. Sad.
>>16930107Why use AI and not just their actual headshots?
>>16930114And as an aside, one of the worst things about AI is that dudes don't even do the hard work of drawing their crushes/girlfriends anymore. They use AI now.
>>16929144the shitt is for normies who'd immediately get bored of seeing the real-life proportion of ED work that are overdoses
i fucking hate attending social events and being reminded im a friendless virgin. can't i just go to clinic and come home? why must i fulfill these retarded obligations...
>>16916299>racist 4chan chuds could be doing life altering surgery on youas a black person this is very scary
Gl on match gayboys
>>16930349You can always choose to get surgery in Africa by Africans who studied non-white man medicine. Nobody is stopping you. Do you prefer to be with your own people, or do you want to be cared for by white men while complaining the entire time? Also you should have hatred for Jews, and not "white people" because the Jews are the ones who enslaved your ass. And your African confreres are the ones who sold your people into Jewish slavery lol
If I'm having a slightly difficult period in life, like all human beings have, then why do doctors insist that I take mind altering psychiatric "medications" which will fuck up my brain?I should never have listened to those doctors. But still they will for some reason insist that they're right.
my most expensive email to date. and godspeed to any potential SOAPbros reading this.>>16930273if you consider things in terms of free food then I'm sure it will be more bearable
>"emergency medicine is so stressful, i dont know how people cope">do 12 hour shift on ED >first four hours literally do nothing>nurses / clerks literally sitting around AI-gening their dogs and cats into goofy costumes>holy fuck d00d, 3 patients to see in the next 8 hours !>epistaxis>my husband punched me >heart palpatations but i haven't taken my statins tee heeI literally worked harder when i was 18 and a janitor.
>>16930526Everything in medicine is like that. "Nurses never get a break" but all I do see is them on their phone or otherwise fucking around. Everyone has the hardest job in the world.
>>16930526it's because of women and faggots
>>16930526>meanwhile on my ED shifts during internship I was getting machete assaults, gunshots to the penis and maybe about 10 stabbings in a single night if it was shortly after payday >oh and here's 5 more gastro infants shitting out every drop of water in their body lol >30+ patients in the waiting room at any given time >occasionally patients riot and throw stones at doctors' cars >jannies running around at breakneck speed trying to get the gore wiped off the examination beds fast enough for new patients to come I hate you first worlders so much it's unreal. I genuinely think I have some form of fucking PTSD from this shit and you people get to sit around doing this and get paid 6 gorillion times more than me.
>>16930657What country is this wtf
>>16930657i worked in a very stressful job for years prior to switching to medicine at a mental institution so i've earned my rite to a easy job lol.I just can't cope with the staff there thinking they have anything but a fucking cakewalk of a job where they maybe do two hours of actual work out of the 12 they're there.
>>16930657Why are your people like this? Could it be... deserved? Could it because your people choose to be this way because it's either genetic, spiritual, political, or a mix of the 3? Try fixing your country. Access to Europeans and European life isn't a human right btw.
>>16930526>ms3 gets an easy day>assumes all days are like thatI had shifts like this on every rotation. Sometimes the ED is on fire, sometimes it's 12 hours of nothingburgers that could have been a telehealth visit with their pcp.
>>16929859>blastocystisnot a real disease?they should really stop testing for every randombacteria in the gutis this the latest scam? telling normies to shit in a jar and pay for it so that they are diagnosed with irrelevant organisms????
>>16930273I'm 32 years old now, I am NEVER attending any new party as a single male
>>16930526how to tell you are a noob in EM without telling others you are a noob
>>16930526>>16930657My ED internship was a 50%-50% chance you could get either or>first time in ED>literally no one comes in for 3 hours>when they do come in its for shit like i need a doctor's note for missing work with a cold, hurt my back>my doctor died 25 years ago and i need a check up>i looked on the internet i think i have leaky gut/gluten intolerance/allergy to sucroce please take me seriously>my pet fish bit me and i think it gave me dracunculiasis>first time parents freaking out about a rash, worms in poop, kid sneezed, burped up food, etc>dementia patients being dropped off at the ED from the kids who no longer want to take care of them>only legitimate case is a 50 year old who came in with a simple stomach ache and we find a 8cm aorta actively dissecting and a kid coughing up bloodI thought ED was so boring, but then>get 4 people at same time all involved in same motor vehicle collision with multiple trauma>guy got shot in the chest and is getting compressions by ems staff>teenager tried mdma for the first time and now having a 25 minute long GTC>11 year old ran away from school and comes to ed after just having a failed attempted suicide>house fire and we get all 6 occupants with smoke+soot inhalation and 2-3 degree burns>fight ends with person stabbed in the stomach with an umbrella>meanwhile ed is overcapacity at 230% >have people vomiting, shitting, and otherwise having mental breakdowns in the waiting room>people complaining on google that they have waited 15 hours so far to get a splinter taken out their pinky finger>just when you think you can finally get to some low priority cases a stroke rolls inSometimes it's all of the above in the same day just changes by the hour. The worst was when we were sent 11 residents from the same nursing home with C. diff when we were already severely overcap.
