I'm 36, been seeking psychiatric help since 16. Nothing has worked at all, except maybe Xanax for problems giving speeches. At first I thought I had autism or anxiety but didnt get checked for autism out of shame and fear of being called autistic.It feels like I am possessed and nearly all my movements are involuntary. It feels like 9 or so spirits are talking to me. There was 20 at one point. It feels like spirits soul/spirit is inside me and it makes my flesh feel different on my tongue hand and feet. I told a doctor about the possessed feeling and she said meds can't help it. She didn't tell me in detail what it is. Is shit like this part of psychosis? It feels exactly like possession.Praying to God and trying religion didn't work. I don't know if I picked the wrong religion to try or tried it wrong but I was resistant to Christianity because of Eternal Torture seeming like the most evil cruel possible thing in existence, and not wanting to try through this experience very hard. But I still put in effort to remove the demon thing not to go to Hell. Didn't get it removed.I've tried like 7 different anti psychotics none have done anything but make me a fat fuck and cause abnormal liver panel on blood work and shit like that. I currently take 2mg of rexulti.I can't stand the feeling of having male spirits posessing me because it feels gay. The female ones I could tolerate. It feels gay because their dick hands and feet would be lined up with my dick hands and feet and tongues too. Fucking gay as shit. It feels like 1 involuntarily licks the top of my mouth and I've tried to kill the thing for being a faggot rapist.I'm hoping this is a type of psychosis like the doctor says and that it's not like 9 demons or some shit. But I believe in my heart its demons. However I can see how the brain is powerful enough to cause something like this.How do I genuine stop believing this is demons and get better? Dr just give me anti psychotic or psych ward Neither work
