I'm sick and tired our frens overseas miss out on this phenomenal sportsball, this cannot continue!
>>155137169... this shit isn't real, right? Right?
Needs more food analogies, how would they explain offsides?
what a sithole
>>155137251>how would they explain offsides?One gentleman skipped the line in McDonald’s when it wasn’t his turn
>>155137169>The score is 2 - 0 because mexico put the ball inside the south african net 2 (two) times, making the game much more difficult for south africa to win. This message was brought to you by McDonalds, download our app and get a free coupon!
There is nothing to understand. It's a sport for retards. That's why it's so popular in turd world countries and why all your players come from them. You kick a ball around for 90 minutes and most of the time nothing happens.
>>155137169>2026™The have a trademark on the number 2026?
>>155137169>The game has started. Both teams will now try to score goals by putting the ball into the goal, i.e. across the goal line in front of the net, of the opposing side. Each goal counts for one (1) point. The game ends after 2x45 (=90) minutes, and the team that scored more goals wins
Red cards are too fucking much, they only create hate and refball claims, losing half the match and then the next one too is too fucking much.Also penalties, I think not all fouls in the area should be penalties.
>>155137357Said the guy from the country they display these explanations for. You guys are just retarded. And your reply shows you actually need this stuff lmfao
>>155137419>90 minutes is the same as 6 quarters in american football
>>155137169explain this in mcdonalds terms
>>155137419>teams will try to win as many games as possible because winning games means advancing. You can only win the World Cup by winning games
>>155137419If you can't explain your sport in 5 words or less, it's a non-sport.
>>155137251>>155137305there's no point in even doing so, americans here cannot run for shit, hence they will never trigger offside rulesi know because im the only who constantly out ran everyone out here
>Surely Americans don't care about soccer because it's too complex and not because they created their own sportsThanks Fifa, now that I understand being down a player is a disadvantage I'll be sure to buy myself a $4000 ticket to a match between Congo and Turkey.
>>155137468You order 11 Big Macs for dinner. you do something stupid (twice) so someone takes 2 Big Macs away as karma. this now puts you at a great disadvantage of getting full.
>>155137468The Hamburglar stole a quarter pounder from Grimace, but he was caught. As punishment, Ronald McDonald discounted 2 burgers from his score, making it much harder for the Hamburglar to win the eating contest.
>>155137592Death sentence
>>155137169I read that red cards means they are short a person for that match. And that person gets suspended for the following match as well. But does that mean the following match is also played with one less player or do they get to substitute someone else in?
>>155137752They get to sub someone in. This also doesn't count towards the limit of 3 subs per match, so it's fine.
ball in net = goodhand on ball = bad
>>155137488Explain at least 5 major sports in America in 5 words or less.
>>155137169>As a result,>..,which means...this is chatgpt generated right?
>>155138456Ten tall niggers jumping around
>>155137305kek
>>155137169This is literally a rule in shootenhoopen too.
Okay if you guys are so smart explain Offsides rule in a way that Americans will understand.
>>155138506>>>155135263>>>>155135263
>>155137488Kick ball into opposite net.
>>155137383no but for FIFA™ and FIFA WORLD CUP™ and FIFA WORLD CUP 2026™ and the FIFA WORLD CUP 2026™ logo and the FIFA WORLD CUP 2026™ mascots etc. etc.(The use of trademarks in this post does not infringe on the rights of the trademarks holders).
>>155137357https://voca.ro/1lQJDdQeLpxy
>>155138286>3 subs per matchCongratulations on waking up from your coma, anon.
>>155147516>>155147516AMERIFATS BTFO FOREVER
help me understand how this was a legit goal and ours wasnthttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UsgWvOiCMMU
Explain to me why our men’s team is mediocre but our women are sorta good. I hear a lot of the excuse is America lacks development and coaching and infrastructure. But how can that be if the women are doing okay for themselves.
>>155147671most euro/sudaca women dont care about soccer, and there development/NTs are even worse off than ours. That and the quality of play is so (laughably) bad that whoever wins is usually a complete crapshoot
>>155147671the best male athletes in the US get funneled into competitive youth football, baseball, and basketball programs because that’s where all the money is. women’s sports don’t have that same financial incentive so the best female athletes here have a much broader range of interests
>>155147671your lesbians are more powerful than other cunts lesbians
>>155138456Hit little ball into holeThrow ball through hoopDrive in circleRun to finish lineSpandex-wearing men fake fighting
>>155137419>The game ends after 2x45 (=90) minutes, and the team that scoreDon't you meant 4 quarters?
>>155137419>2x45 (=90)You idiot, they cant understand this, you will scare them with math
>>155147813Doesn't help the actually competent woman players, 1 in 1000, are ignored or treated as regulars because they cannot run as fast or aren't as marketable as others despite obviously having much more vision or innate athletics. For example this chubby fuglo is the only girl in this continent i've seen (aside from a BR girl in a WC) to be able to do a man's play: While running around in three-quarters of the field she turned around to receive a pass, glimpsed back, did a chest control and with the ball up high did a "blind" through pass by lifting her leg 90 degrees with no wind-up, a grand battement pass if you will, which reached a winger that did a puny cross and someone tapped in. And they gave the entire credit to the tap-in striker, such is life in mexican kakistocracy.
>>155137169Can you try again but these time with Pixar style animated dancing characters?
>>155138456>baseballFat hispanics stare at balls>basketballTall guys jump and fall>ice hockeyWe're here for the fights>us footballConcussions and yellow lines
>>155137251You doordashed a big mac and two triple cheeseburgers with large fries. They forgot your two cheeseburgers, so you have to doordash again later tonight.
>>155137419but what happens if the teams have an equal amount if points
>>155146606when you get a burger you have two mcdonalds employees in front of you (a cook and a cashier). if you are so hungry that you tumble over the counter, they take your burger away
>>155137169
>>155137169This is great. Even worse than subtitles on a movie.
>>155138363That's what I'm saying, like kick the ball in the net, America.
>>155147671Remember in Tsubasa the guys went from Japan to Ac Milan and whatever other european clubIf you want to play at an higher level you will end up in europeYou dont have the footy culture, the conpetitions etc Also you have your own sports
>>155149073Complaining about subtitles is such an obvious sign of stupidity. Go watch Solaris (1972).
>>155149155I like to watch movies, not read them.
>>155148272she cute tho
How do you explain offsides without it taking up the entire screen?
>>155147516>https://voca.ro/1lQJDdQeLpxythis is how all americans sound
>>155137449Soccer is a children's game, ein Kinderspiel, if you will, in the land of the free, so everybody knows how soccer works. If that screenshot is real it makes no sense. American sports are far more advanced in comparison.
>>155137251They use capeshit analogies now
>>155137357There is a 99% chance you have some negroid slave ancestor
>>155137305Wait a second. I get it now.Thanks, Angus McAngus
>>155137169I have no idea what soccer coaches actually do.
>>155147516HehYou aight, anon
>>155150078They choose the most suitable players and formation for the game, they decide when and whom to sub. They tell players what to do based on the team’s strengths and the analytics taken from the opponent. And then they also dance around the coaching zone during the game because it all depends on the players actually doing it
>>155148881I love this picture, especially coming from a German flag to take a joke and over explain it to such an exhaustive degree that it actually wraps around to being funny again.
>>155137169this must be on FoxFox's target audience across almost all networks is drooling retards and boomers, so they assume I must be one too
>>155150187And people who watch CNN and NBC are smart? Or how does this work?From an outside perspective, it seems like all your channels are very over the top and biased And no, this is not me defending our media. They are super scum themselves and lie all the time. But not like this
>>155137169First good image of the wc this year.
>>155137558>>155137592kek
>>155137419You missed the part where they keep the clock running while the ball is out of bounds or dead and then the ref just adds time based on the vibe despite have the technology to handle these scenarios for 90+ years
>>155150078The pace around and are eye candy for faggy euros. It's why they wear tailored suits and loafers and stuff. The original half time slags for European boomers.
>>155147536take me back
>>155147631the video explains how the rebounder was onside, no idea what other goal you're talking about
>>155147671boys/men's soccer is a sport for richfags who can afford to put their sons on travel teams, any space in the hood is already taken up by basketball courts, in yurop it's the exact opposite
>>155150078occasionally yell VAMOSyes even the US coach does this, they all do
>>155150223NBC is a regular terrestrial broadcast news network, you probably mean MSNBC which is the cable news equivalent of CNN and Fox News (no I will not call it MSNow, that's dumb)In my limited experience CNN and MSNBC don't dumb things down for their audience, although MSNBC assumes I must be a whiny white yuppie progressive or an old liberal boomer who falls for ragebaitFox News insults my intelligence, CNN doesn't really do that
>>155137169Just when you thought football couldn't get any worse, along comes the goycattle world cup in muttland.
>>155150548this strategy managed to win ppl three peat champion league titles so it does work
>>155150078They pose for those insecure euro memes comparing soccer coaches to football coaches
>>155147516jej
>>155150065Of course you called him that, you were thinking of burgers.
>>155147813Do you have the webm of her stylin on the team she just scored the 11:0 on or something like that? You know, the scissors celebration
>>155152869
>>155147516dangit bobby
>>155150223fox news literally runs commercials that tell you to donate money to israel. i am not even joking.
>>155152966Based Fox.
>>155149155It's also proving the poster being a real American, in all honesty. They just can't handle subtitles so much, that hollywood said "let's take all the international movies with high rating and remake them the hollywood way AND in english AND with a somewhat unique american twist.there's a lot of examples, I usually fall back to these three:> Battle Royal (2000, JP) re-imagined as The Hunger Games (yayaya)> [Rec] (2007, ESP) re-imagined as Quarantineand - obviously ->Godzilla
Please kindly point me towards the soccer ball general. I know 100 shitpost threads are fun and all, but where's the main thread?
>>155153162Match threads get a sticky once the match starts.
>And they are playing, the turf slamming under the cleets and the mercenaries kicking vigorously against the colourful Trionda. Towering over them all is the Mutt and he is naked eating, his fat feet lively and quick and now in doubletime and bowing to the Israelis, huge and pale and diabetic, like an enormous hog. He never watches soccer, he says. He says he’ll never care. He turns on redzone and rolls backwards and throws back his head and downs Pepsi deep in his throat and he is a great customer, the mutt. He checks his mlb team and the basketball shorts draping loosely under his belly and he swings about and takes possession of one of the Dorito bags and he opens it and takes a mouthful , two mouthfuls, gulping and crunchig at once. His feet are fat and brown. He never watches soccer. He says that he will never care. He watches the drafts and some hockey and he is a great customer. He never watches soccer, the mutt. He is consuming, consuming. He says that he will never care.
>>155150480i remember for a few years i'd take a train into philly and by the time i'd get to temple station (major hood area) there'd be a bunch of young niggas kicking a ball around on a shitty field. it's a shame our federation is so retarded and insists on being pay to win because those little niggas could've been something
>>155153185Woowee! Is the USA just in automatically because we host?
>>155152929Kek, thanks senpai
>>155137169Explain the units in terms of body parts (feet, arms, BBCs)
>>155153225Yes, but that's bad for you.
>>155153225Yes, host(s) is/are always qualified without participating in the qualifiers, which is why the us mex and can had nothing but friendlies in the past two years.
>>155153268yeah
>>155137305Nice try seamus, there are no lines anymore only giant ipads
>kick ball around for 90 minutes>nothing happens>sometimes another player touches you so you have to flop around as if you were stabbedwhat's there to understand?
>>155137169>ball is the size of a small asteroid, and the players are the size of a quarter elephant>the pitch is 1000 hamburgers long
Anyone remember those NFL matches that were on nickelodeon at the same time as the normal broadcast.But in Nickelodeon they were full with references of their shows and memes kids were into. Then Dora the explore would appear to explain the rules like what is a flag or a sack, just like how she would in her show, dumbing it down so little kids would know what is going on.Well, this shit that is aimed at adults, made it in a more retarded way.Never change America.
