>>96815042
A murder mystery isn't the kind of activity I want to "play".
If I wanted to listen to two or three hours of ass-pulls that results in something that comes completely out of left field, I'd watch any movie directed by Rian Johnson.

>>96815042
would be too horny to focus. shy gals have damaged my brain.

Too busy warring against the Turks for the glory of the Republic.
Now back to the galley benches with you.

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>>96815520
Increasing desire to run a Mario murder mystery game.

>>96817353

Mario and murder don't get along well. Luigi on the other hand...

>>96815042
As a Vampire: the Masquerade player, that's a standard plot.

>>96815042
I want to do this, but in real life. Except I'm the corpse. Forget about Venetian carnival, I just want to be a corpse.

Is this a Dobson thread.

>>96815042
Too busy getting fucked up on Amotillado

>>96818159
Lucky. Wish i dreamed of being something i was guaranteed to become.

>>96815042
Why aren't you?
Is it because you're FRIENDLESS?
Because you're GAMELESS?
Because you're A PITIFUL IDEAS GUY BUMPING A SHIT THREAD ON A DEAD BOARD?

>>96815042
I ran a murder mystery once.
It was solved in three minutes, and devolved into a werewolf hunt, which went badly.
The gendarmerie were summoned, and everybody agreed to never speak of it again.

TTRPG's don't lend themselves to mystery solving as you are more dependent on rolling high for clues as opposed to actually thinking on your feet.

>>96815042
Name one thing about Venice that doesn't involve canals.

>>96822280
World-renowned glasswork.

>>96815042
i hate it*lians

>>96822280
Unique patron republican government.

>>96822280
outlasted by Ragusa

>>96822280

Snazzy reggae
https://youtu.be/Ria-rbE9qTE

>>96815042
Because the party has to rescue their employer's sister from Barbary pirates, first.

>>96815042
Because my current game takes place in post-apocalyptic Oregon

>>96815042
Cause too many of my IRL friends are from Venice.

The whole adventure would be filled with retarded jokes about eating cats, getting drunk, and searching from Yara. And general hate for the central Venice.

And the non italians at the table will be completely lost on what the fuck is happening.

>>96822280
They sacked Constantinople

>>96815042
To be honest. I've been thinking of somehow incorporating a Venice Carnival section for Impossible Landscapes. I think it's pretty obvious as to why.

>>96826309
>searching from Yara
Explain this one, Italianon. Your slightly cracked English makes it inscrutable.

>>96822280
Venice is super interesting actually.

Did you know that the city is built on wooden poles that haven't been replaced once since the city was first made? The foundation of the city was created by hammering wooden poles into the clay and covering them up, making a stable surface to build on top of but because they are encased in the clay oxygen can't reach them so they never rot.

The drinking water system of Venice was solved by a system of sand wells in every district that collect rainwater through gutters specifically aimed to funnel rain into the wells and then filter the water through sand to remove debris or other impurities and then collects at the bottom of the well for drawing and drinking.

Venice's election system was wild, because representatives of the people were established by lottery. And then, among the winners, there was a *second lottery*. The system of split lotteries run by separate staff created a level of randomness that was impossible to game, meaning that political corruption was kept out because it was functionally impossible to be a career politician or engage in meaningful corruption, because even if you did manage to buy out someone with bribes they wouldn't actually be in power for very long and you had no idea who was going to replace them. The cost of trying to buy the loyalty of government officials was simply too great because you had to start from scratch on it every few years.

>>96815064
fpbp

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>>96815042
Do you know how many murders happen in not!venice? They live right next to not!sicilians in my setting... It's simpler to find a needle in a haystack, or escort chariot-boats to protect cargo from pirates.

>>96836144
>notnot

>>96815042
Because I hate Italy.

>>96839343
Venice isn't Italian.

>>96822266

Do tell

>>96837898
A double negative, typical sicilian

>>96822280
Money laundering and beautiful architecture. Also a bullshit crusade and the fall of the Roman Empire.

>>96841137
Party is my friends; some experienced, some new.
We are all like, nineteen.

Being a pretentious little shit at the time, I decided to run Call of Ch'thulhu, but not as a mythos game; I decided to ambush them with Hammer Horror, as they all expected Mythos shit.
And set it in a country chateau during the second French Empire.

So they rolled their characters; two army men; one the retired colonel, who put all his skill points into headbutt, and the other, his Moroccan aide who had followed gim out of service; the only character who's name I recalled, because it was "Mustafa Balzac", and our third guy, I can't remember what he played, mighta been a relative of the chap who owned the chateau.

Anyway, I have them all invited to a party; Mustafa sexually harasses the staff, the colonel gets plastered and is confronted with the widespread knowledge of his dubious sexual exploits in Morocco, and the third man steals all the silverware and gossips.

In the night, after everybody is in their rooms, there is a caterwauling, and the guests run out; !somebody has been killed!" the servants yell.
Mustafa hides in his guest-room cupboard, the other two investigate.

They inspect the room, so find the body of a young aristocrat, with her throat ripped open; the full moon shines through the shattered wind-
>"Werewolf"
Oh come on
>"You said Full Moon"
Yeah but
>"Werewolf"
So, I sigh and press on.
The staff find all the guests; the poor maid has to get Mustafa out of the cupboard.
Breakfast is subdued in the morning, and the colonel and the third man decide to interview the guests to figure out if any of them are the werewolf.
No werewolf is found.
Mustafa continues to sexually harass the help.
No Werewolf is found.
Third man steals more silverware.

They are presented with my map of the grounds;
It has the house, a gamekeeper's shack, a small vineyard, and extensive woodlands.

They go for the gamekeeper's shack.
They convince him to give them his old musket.

>>96844951
>Mustafa Balzac
kek

>>96844951
They decide to head on out to the woods past the vineyard.

This is where they are confronted by three wolves.

Regular wolves.

The wolves get the jump on them, being abnormally aggressive;
The bout goes poorly.
Mustafa has his throat torn out in round one, and begins bleeding out.
The Colonel aims the musket at a wolf and pulls the trigger;
"Colonel"
I remind him
"You don't have any bullets"
Third man heroically pulls out one of his stolen dinner-knives and jumps on a wolf, stabbing it in the bum for. . . . one damage.

I am awestruck by how mad the players rolls were, but taking the opportunity to save their asses, I hae the wolves retreat from this minor poke in the bum; the recipient yelps, and the others back off and they lose their grit.

I know, I know, I was an inexperienced dm.

Anyway, they stabilize Mustafa, and carry him into the Vineyard shed.

So I decide to terrorize them some.
Horror game, right?

Wolves start crowding round the shed and howling.

I described the shed as being full of old wine presses and buckets and boxes and furniture, as to hint what they could do.

I described increasingly the probing wolves scratching at the door and throwing themselves against it.

I opted to play the implicit werewolf dumb at that moment; the door goes BANG as it's being kicked in.

At last my players brains engage and start barricading the door with furniture.

And they pile everything in the shack up, and sit there in the dark pissing themselves.

Eventually the howling subsides.

Many, many hours later, a rescue party shows up, with some gendarmes.

They take statements from each of them, which sound like nonsense, and Mustafa is taken to hospital.

They all went on to live perfectly normal lives, and the whole backstory I prepared for the werewolf revenge of the disowned heir who raped and killed the poor servant girl, making a deal with the devil to become a werewolf went totally undiscovered.

The end.