I created this comic 1 hour ago. It's not finished, but i rest after making these 5 pages. What do you think? I know "too much text"- and i would remove text in the later pages and draw more images. I know i can do that. But for a quick exposition/story, i thought, at the beginning, that i can allow myself to do a bit more text then usual.Besides that, how's the story?And what would you suggest i change, remove or add? How should it continue?Thanks in advance.
>>83169423
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>>83169438Page 5/5
no responses ):
It looks like a document with random doodles. You aren't using the medium as intended Think of the drawing first then add the text. Also you need to learn how to draw
>>83169423second panel looks like a buttholeI have no other opinions because I flunked media literacy at school
>isekai is just wish fulfillment /r/im12andthisisdeep called. They want their top post back
>>83174390Oh, no, i'm invading this board.I stay here and i know what i'm doing.You go back, not me.Unlike you, i actually put effort and love/meaning into my messages.Can you tell me actual responses, not this garbage you gave as a response?
>>83173300Well to me it looks like the average 4chan comic: except with more text.It doesnt have unneccessary drawings. It does not have unneccessary style. Only some crude simple drawings ("learn how to draw"- no, i draw well enough ,maybe not this time, but overall, it is more then enough)I think the story is good, and that the depiction of it is partially not perfect/very fast, but that is the best part about it: it is quick, rather then having anything to add.What to add? Style? Garbage? More unneccessary filler? Unneccessary images?I could make the images larger, and slightly "more aesthetic".I could also position the text in a way that it seems less disordered.Besides that, maybe even more lines to split up things.That's it. I could add more images to certain texts, but why add things when they do not improve it? This is a comic due to images, not due to "comic being the purpose of a medium". I do not intend to make a comic "like a comic", i do intend to create something as useful/good/fitting as possible, not restrained by "image amount" or "style" or "amount of text".Yes, i could remove so much text that the plot would get lost, and then, it would perhaps be "more of a comic" to you. Do i want to produce garbage? no!oh right, "think of the drawing first". I thought ofthe story first, and i would have drawn more had i not tried to actually prioritize quick story over "comic-image-fullfilledness"--- do you truly claim your "comicness" is more importiant then my "quick storyness"?
>>83169423You say "too much text", I say "too little text" - and too little drawing too, for that matter. The nonexistent detail of the art and the terse, function-over-form narration just evokes a feeling of confusion and discomfort in the viewer. It took me a few rereads to figure out what was happening and I'm still not 100% sure about it. It's actually kind of a cool literary device but you did not pull it off well at all. There is such a thing as death of the author and letting a story be open to interpretation but I assume that is not what you were going for and you meant for the story to have a definitive message.Placing a priority on production speed and minimalism over presentation, at your current skill level, only hinders your ability to tell your story.As a wise man once said "Remember to write it as a story of what you would do, Don't make mistakes, and make sure it has no grammatical or other errors in it. If you are lazy, I will kill you." Don't be lazy and practice more, you seem to prioritize writing over visuals so maybe just write some prose, you have the kind of unique writing style only found in schizos and ESLs but it is unrefined
