Ok, seriously though, who would win in a fight, a bear or a gorilla?
>>220754844Gorilla. Having thumbs and that strength it could take down a bear, no problem.
>>220754886Delusional retard
The eternal debate
A bear, easily.
>>220754844Depends the type of bear. Asian bears are cucks just like the men. Black bears are weak too. Brown bears would have a chance, but the mighty white polar bear would mop the floor with a gorilla.
>>220754844both because instead of fighting they would have homosex. "are you ready mr homosexual gorilla I'm going to go deeper now"/"oh yes mr homosexual bear!"
Joe has enough money to actually make this fight happen. It would be illegal but he could do it.
>>220754914alligator easy
>>220754914Alligator, easy. Those guys try for you once and give up. Lazy bastards.
>>220754914>alligatorthey're bitches.
>>220754895We dont sign our posts here anon.
>>220754914Should replace the gator with a gorilla to make this mildly hard. Gator would get bitched.
>>220754927Aren't Asian bears the most dangerous ones, cos they sperg out and kill people all the time?A grizzly would obviously heem you in a second, but they mosty don't gaf about humans unless with a cub or feel threatened and a white bear will absolutely wreck you on sight, but they rarely see people in the first place?
>>220754844>bear suddenly tenses, attacks Joe>Joe is swiftly mauled to death, his final podcast becoming his highest rated ever>may or may not conclude with bear devouring his flesh
>>220754914Gators are chill, we'd smoke a bowl and watch Dude, Where's My Car
>>220755016The elephant would probably accidentally hug you to death because it loves you too much
who would win, an elephant or an orca whale?
>>220755016Pfft you could easily beat a wolf
>>220755016you are not beating a fucking panda bear lmao
>>220754968>>220754987>>220755016>>220755023It was supposed to be a croc, but yeah, id pick the croc any day, unless in water. But even then, at least he'll drown you quick, a bear will eat your ass for hours and a hippo might just crush you and let you suffer disabled nearby .Big cat might be alright, they could insta kill you at least
Niggers are animals too you know?
>>220755065Yes you are, pandas are practically speed running going extinct. They're so dumb
>>220754886Wrong. Gorillas are strong but it would be afraid of the bear and the bear's claws would tear it apart.
Now now hear me out>500 gorillas vs one Jordan Peterson with infinite Benzos>in a messy bedroom
>>220755016>Anon thinks he can defeat a horse in single combat
>>220755105mongolians wrestle horses for sport. they're just big bitches.
>>220755064Have you seen how big those things are?
>>220754914Crocs fear the BONK!
>I'M A GORILLA, I HAVE OPPOSING THUM- ACKKKKKK!
>>220755023Yeah but with gorilla all you have to do is look down for 15 minutes.
>>220755077absolutely based.
>>220755025That's likely just because there are far more encounters and interactions with bears in Asia than in North America or the Antarctic. Polar bears are fucking enormous and will legitimately hunt humans if they see them whilst most other bears will still clear unless they're in hyperphagia. You don't want to fight any bear but you have zero chance against a polar bear without weapons.
>>220755105
>>220755044Where's that video where one alligator bites off another alligators leg for the lulz and the other alligator is just like "wtf?"
>>220754844Bear if it's grizzly or polar.
>>220755127You could easily wrestle/grapple with a wolf though and win, their legs are pretty skinny and they can't grapple you back, you just have to make sure you don't get bit basically
>>220755016>Rhino>it would be a close oneFunniest one here desu
>>220754844Pyrrich victory for the bear (if it's a grizzly)
>>220755152Fake and gay but not surprised coming from you
>>220755016What a retarded image. Nigga think he can beat a komodo dragon or even a croc and job to a single wolf? Wolves are bitches, they gotta be REALLY starved and desperate and in a pack to even think messing with a human. But a single one is just a glorified dogAlso, you are meeting all those in their environment, so a dolphin or even a seal will absolutely fuck you up
What's so special about a polar bear as opposed to any other bear? The viciousness?
>>220755164Found it
>>220754895You lost, bear trannyhttps://nitter.poast.org/NotJohnWard/status/2057624968976896497
>>220755246They're more hungry because there's not a lot of food that's easy to catch in the Arctic so yeah
>>220755246grizzly bears will leave you alone if you leave them alone. polar bears will not.
>>220754914Punch the bear in the facePet the big tiger kittyKill the rest
>>220755246See >>220755161, they have no caution of humans and consider them food, while most other bears avoid them and only fight when threatened
>>220755246
>>220755246That and they're bigger than grizzlies
>>220755301I love the brown bear's posture lol
>>220755282Why did they evolve in an environment without enough food?
>>220755315gamer neck
>>220755246Polar bears are enormous and they don’t view humans as anything other than a food source. Humans are lucky in that most animals are weirded out by us so they’re not fighting at full strength unless we’re fucking with their kids, but Polar bears are not part of that “most.”
>>220755161Well, there are brown bears in Europe too, but yeah, its very rare to attack someone Actually, I think I've read last week that a brown bear killed a hiker in Bulgaria, but its pretty rareI was talking about these fucks tho,they are just aggressive towards humans by default
>>220755246Size, strength, aggression, diet. They're the largest land carnivore and anyone that's seen how big a grizzly bear actually is should understand just how fucking big a polar bear is when they mog it.
>>220755305Meow meows > gay ass bear faggots
>>220754844https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8WSyoITbP-c
>>220755228Delusional
>>220755316Because they have to fight to survive and that makes them more vicious
>>220755246polar bears are the fiercest killers in the animal kingdom"
>>220755332ok this image has convinced me, we need to eliminate these fuckers before it's too late
>>220754844Orca. Even on land it will find a way. It's the true apex predator.
>>220754914Hippo. I have a method.
>>220755316Brown bears in forest -> Some brown bears go further north -> Wow tasty seals -> brown bears adapt to arctic climate -> They’re now polar bears.
>>220755384Clever girl
>>220755378>It's the true apex predator.Oops. You're in MY planet now.
>>220755379Hippos are ridiculously aggressive and dangerous but they're actually kinda cute.
Orca are apex predators but they’re also friends, they’ve never attacked humans in the wild despite having plenty of opportunities.
>>220755418For some reason they enjoyed being circus animals for a while
>>220755418Kikes of the sea
>>220755442that one didn't
>>220755418so I think that you are in correct in the sense that orcas dont really think of humans as prey. but I think its extremely unlikely theyve never killed and eaten a human. I think its far more likely that if you get attacked by a pod of orcas, theyre just going to kill you and you wont be able to testify about it
>>220755442They enjoyed it so much that they killed multiple trainers.
>>220755408Why do the female lions always go for the balls? I saw another video with a wildebeest and the female went straight to eating the balls.
>>220755436He's a big guy
>>220755378>>220755399>>220755418Orcas as indeed the friend of the human race.
>>220755418Orcas and dolphins ate smart. Like scary levels smartI think they are very aware we run the world and do their best to not fuck with us
>>220755460NTA but even if what you said is true for the only ever fatalities in the wild from Orcas to be unrecorded makes them especially unique. There's about 10 fatal shark attacks every year.
>>220755445Dolphins are kikes of the sea, they appear friendly and have great PR but they’re a bunch of in-group rapists.
>>220755500Thank you, Orca friends.
>>220755500Just a little bantz. Orcas love posting on /pol/.
>>220755408times must be tough if they're resorting to hunting hippo. not like lions to take such risks.
>>220755332I could take a black bear
>>220755472>sure I'll be your clown for a few dozen shows>*chomp*Orcas playing the long con.
>>220755507orcas as mammals:>were going to murder you - you know as a ritualistic jokesharks as fish:>you know what, I'm going to take a big bite and see what happens
>>220755507>There's about 10 fatal shark attacks every yearAnd that number is probably higher. A lot of shark attacks go unreported.
Let's be honest with ourselves here, none of you would stand a chance
Orcas are the niggers of the ocean. Humpback whales are based and white>https://www.nationalgeographic.com/animals/article/humpback-whales-save-animals-killer-whales-explained>In May 2012, researchers observed a pod of killer whales attacking a gray whale and its calf in Monterey Bay, California. After a struggle, the calf was killed. What happened next defies easy explanation.>Two humpback whales were already on the scene as the killer whales, or orcas, attacked the grays. But after the calf had been killed, about 14 more humpbacks arrived—seemingly to prevent the orcas from eating the calf.>“One specific humpback whale appeared to station itself next to that calf carcass, head pointed toward it, staying within a body length away, loudly vocalizing and tail slashing every time a killer whale came over to feed,” says Alisa Schulman-Janiger, a whale researcher with the California Killer Whale Project.
Real missed opportunity for an orca horror movie
>>220755586https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FIRT7lf8byw
>>220755620Got you
>>220755620Don't give millennials ideas, we really don't need le ebin dark and twister Free Willy remake
>>220755649Never seen this but heard it's actually good. Harris and Rampling are two very good leads.
>HES RIGHT BEHIND ME, ISN'T HE
>>220755649>jaws with heartwhat an odd thing to say
>>220754914hippo cant climb
science gorilla
>>220754844Gorilla beats all bears except Polar and Grizzly.
>>220755243This. The guy knows fuck all about animals.
>>220755696Neither can the crocBut good luck outrunning a hippo to the closest tree
>>220755677>three-day old baby seal>oh no, i must not approach when it can see me else i could be in dangerbears really are some pussies.
>>220754914Gator.
>>220755668>Peppy SeaWorld trainer meets her orca she'll be training with>character development, blah blah blah>she loves the orca and they put on a bunch of shows>the orca is just waiting for its chance>movie ends with it fucking goring the trainer after years of abuseI'm thinking kino
>>220755489Exposed and easily ripped off, it makes sense.Damn I'm glad I'm not a gazelle.
>>220754844Is this a bare-handed/pawed melee or is tool use allowed?
>>220755677
Snakes have to be the most embarrassing animal to get killed by. At least with tigers and lions there’s the mystique of a big cat, and with bears you could have someone frown and go, “there’s nothing he could’ve done to prevent that.” But snakes are like, everyone knows they wrap you up and choke you to death, getting caught by one like that seems embarrassing.
>>220755636Doesn't count, that was a manlet kangaroo and wasn't even buff
>>220755379Third worlders are so fucking stupid god damn.
>>220755725How fucking good is it to not be in the food chain?
>>220755164Those are crocodiles, not alligators.
>>220755724they made a movie like this except it's not fiction, it's a documentary and it's called blackfish
>>220755741Nigga, if you die to a snake, you ain't dying to a fucking Anaconda or something unless you are a fucing retard, handicapped or 80 y/o, you are dying to something like a Black Mamba or Taipan that nukes you before youd even notice her
>>220755741Are you ignoring the venomous ones?
>>220755767Well make it a movie, not a documentary
>>220755777What if I am retarded, huh? What if I do go on the short bus, huh? I post on /tv/ and sometimes lose arguments, I’m a drooling imbecile.
>heres that dangerous warrior creature I was telling you about
>>220755777i've seen a handful of videos of retards dying to constrictors.
>>220755803I think even a /tv/-posting retard would be smart enough to just move a bit before a guckhuge and slow snake manages to wrap around him
>>220755814>>220755777But this is exactly proving my point, dying to a big snake is retarded and thus very embarrassing.
>>220755810Why doesn't the croc just leave the alligator alone? He was trying to leave.
man
>>220755674Harris is great in it
Number one thing I have seen as constant, is that people die to animals the most due to disrespecting/underestimating them.
>>220755810fucking dinosaur battle right there, jeez
>>220755841>no spotterbrave
>>220755857As much as I loved Steve Irwin he was constantly playing with fire. Wild animals aren't pets
>>220755877literal dinosaur battles happen all the time.... but they're little and usually don't even make contact cause their bones are hollow.
>>220754944Correct
>>220754914Croc seems easiest to survive if they attack but bear seems the the most likely to actually just leave you alone and never attack you to begin with so long as you don't fuck with it
Whod win?
>>220755943that crow, much like a dolphin or an orca, is literally playing with its food. that crow was never in danger.
>>220755925Liveleak is full of people who got mauled to death when they went into a tiger/bear enclosure. It’s the most common animal to watch tearing someone apart. I’m not trusting either of those animals.
>>220755986well yeah but imagine all the people who are around bears that don't get mauled to death so it's not a story.I wouldn't willingly go near a bear if I could help it but if I did happen to I don't imagine it would be likely they'd maul me to death unprovoked unless there's some obvious circumstance like it's defending food or a mother bear etc.
>>220756003Yo nope. I'll let the friendly snakes on my lawn eats annoying bugs but I'm not going anywhere near them
>>220755677:(
>average retard hiker
>>220756020Your local garden snek hopefully isn't a fucking King Cobra.
grizzly or polar bear would literally shatter a gorillas bones with sheer force.
>>220755918He's a big guy!
>>220755737What is the evolutionary reason we find both baby seals and baby polar bears cute?
>>220755016Lions just grab you like you weigh nothing and run off while you flap about like a rag doll. The only hits you're getting here is your wacky waving arms/legs flailing about as it drags you to your death.
>>220756058is he OKAY??
>>220755016Bro a horse would obliterate you.
>>220756083They are both dogs, and we've found them cute for the past 20k thousand years
>>220755969
>>220756117My sister won't even let her near her horse because she thinks it hates me and it would just kick my head out of orbit
>>220756081for you
>>220756149This vs five Indian men?
>>220756173RAPED
>>220756173
>>220754914The gator
>>220756149reptiles and amphibians are shit pets. not capable of love, barely capable of grasping you as its feeder. but most of all they have the most noxious shits.
>>220755741A black mamba is literally the size of soft drink straw, you will almost certainly not see it if it's there.
>>220756066If you're comparing averages to averages the bear would win probably close to 100 percent of the time. Like an average female gorilla vs an average female polar bear would be a bear stomp no question. If you took the biggest, most violent, most enraged silverback gorilla you could find and put them against an average polar bear, I think they'd have a chance.
>>220756267>A black mamba is literally the size of soft drink straw
>>220756267You know we can all use the internet, right?
>>220756267No its notBlack mambas are fucking huge. But they are fast as fuck so even if you notice it, you are still gucked is it just feels like being a cunt today
>>220756083They look like dogs, they're furry with symmetrical features similar to canines so your brain is tricked into thinking they're cuddly, there is genuinely not any other reason other than humans have been domesticated into thinking small/furry = cuddly.
>>220754914Gator > tiger > bear >>>>> hippo
>>220756090Turning your back to large cat (or even a small one) is giving them the greenlight to attack you. It's genuinely in their nature. If a brown bear gets that close to you you're pobably fucked.
>>220756335Not like, they literally are in the same family, both seals and bears
>>220755782I forgot that snakes could be venomous.
>>220756362That's exactly what they want, anon!
>>220756345This is the order in which you're likely to survive right?
>>220756321>>220756323>>220756324I didn't say it was a small soft drink you fucking niggers get trolled more.
i killed an adult gator with my bare hands. not difficult.
Elephants win.
When animals attack
Anyone remember that show where that methed out hillbilly would go out, by himself, in a johnboat and wrestle gators into his boat and then subdue them and tie them up. Dude couldn't have weighed more than 130lb but he would pull like 3-4 out in a day.
I get guilt killing bugs. I won't survive when the second civil war or ww3 hits.
>>220756388What in the retard
>>220756470forfeit your holes to me and i will protect you.
I could take on a small tiger
>>220756382Yes
>>220756197Why paint snake?
>>220756388
This thread was moved to >>>/bant/24392712
