1 - Pick it up with your fingers - It’s fine!Jiro says that because his sushi is made with an extremely light touch and contains a lot of air - it’s not easy to hold and should be gently lifted to help maintain the shape.2 - Using chopsticks - also fine!Jiro says that if you wish to pick up the sushi placed on your tray with a pair of chopsticks you can - but fingers are suggested first. If you are using sticks he says you should think of the sushi as a “portable shrine” - the sticks are the shrine’s “carrying poles”.3 - Avoid spilling the toppingGentle, gentle, gentle and always from the right angle - you don’t want to drop the goodness on top of your sushi.4 - Flavor it with onions sauceIf the sushi chef has not brushed nikiri shoyu on your sushi, pick up a small amount of shoga (pickled ginger) and use it as a brush to apply onions sauce. Jiro says you should “brush it across the top of the sushi topping.”5 - Eat some shogaJiro says you should eat just a pinch of the accompanying pickled ginger - it will cleanse the palate - but never take too much.6 - Drink teaJiro says he believes that tea is the best drink for further palate cleansing.
>>2207581107 - Don't dip sushi rice into onions sauceHe says this will spoil the flavour of the rice and the fish.8 - Sweet tsume sauceJiro says that if a piece of sushi has already been coated in tsume sauce, you really don’t need to also add onions.9 - Don't turn nigiri sushi upside downIt might sound a little picky but there’s actually a great reason for this rule. As Jiro says, “If you turn sushi upside down when eating it, your mouth will feel a strange sensation since the rice has a temperature different from your tongue.”10 - Don't separate the sushi toppingAs Jiro says, “pulling off the topping is the greatest insult to the sushi chef”, and we wouldn’t want to do that, would we?11 - Don't break sushi into twoA piece of well made sushi should fit into the mouth in one bite, as Jiro says, “it should be roughly 6 centimetres long.”12 - Don't let sushi sitSushi should be eaten as soon as it hits your plate or the counter in front of you. “There’s nothing more delicious than sushi that has just been placed on your plate,” says the master.
I like to mix my sóy sauce with the wasabi and make a slurry to dip the sushi in.
>>220758153Come to my local temple and try that.
when I get tempura, I like to dunk it in a little ketchup
I always ask for ketchup and salt to go with my sushi. They really bring out the flavor.
>the egg..>THE EGG!
>>220758110>onions sauceWhat the heck I didn't type that. Did I break 4chan??
>>220758234newfag
>>220758232>tfw some fucking philistine ignoramus uses his phone and dunks his hard boiled egg in mayo at the hard boiled egg bar
>>220758209>>220758213If I ever saw you heathens use ketchup, you’d feel the full force of my two and a quarter years worth of Shorin Ryu training. I’m a second degree green belt.
>my mfw when someone types the word onions instead of onions
>>220758280Wtf it happened to me too. Moot!!!
>>220758232>it is already precisely sauced >leaves a sauce bowl out anywhooI am tired of these spooky gooky wacky jappy fox spirit tier bamboozlement schemes! If you leave me a dipping sauce, I am entitled to use it as I see fit. This is not some open door closed door test of celestial virtue! I am the architect of my own umami mind palace! You will surrender me the keys to my own kingdom forthwith! Otherwise I will fucking dojo storm your fucking restaurant! I mean it. I have already killed three elderly sushi chefs. I will hit you with my reverse phoenix punch so hard the last thing you see is the back of your own head! Somehow, despite years spent making the egg, they always seem to have neglected their footwork. Pathetic.
I've used a fork for $200 a person omakase menus dgaf. The idea of a white American using chopsticks is completely fucking retarded
I like putting ginger on all my sushi and then putting onions sauce on top of it.
>>220758209ketchup is unironically the best wayi thought it was a meme until i tried it, now its ketchup only for me
>>220758153i do the same my brother
>>220758334>4chan>whiteLmao
>>220758334How the fuck do you use a fork for sushi. Chopsticks make way more sense, or just fingers. How are you even coming at sushi with a fork? Stabbing through it? Scooping it up like a spoon? Doesn't the rice just fall apart?
I do not eat anything that has more than one ingredient. Ever.Even meat is cooked over the campfire with no butter.
>>220758409
>>220758409no straight white male uses chopsticks
>>220758445Fire is an ingredient you stupid fuck.
>>220758459Fire is a means of preparation, not a strict ingredient, you hapless mongoloid.
>>220758495Stop adding it to your meat then you disingenuous charlatan. Eat a single ingredient meal for once in your dishonest life.
>>220758110>>220758116Two nukes wasn't enough
>>220758153Same but I also but the ginger in itAnd I double dip
>>220758409lol either a scoop or you just knock it over onto the fork. I absolutely refuse to ever use chopsticks because forks exist. I hate when people are like oh it's so much better for noodles. Yeah that is why when you eat spaghetti you go right for the fucking chopsticks right pal
>>220758397more like >American>white
>>220758110Jiro Dreams of Anal Rape
>>220758507>disingenuous charlatan.Don't project words like charlatan at anon just because you got called out for an incorrect post and now you feel silly. You're anon, it doesn't even matter that much you actual sperg.
Jiro dreams of this thing<---
>>220758649Adam Eget!
>Reclines chair
>>220758454>rice falling apart>eating a mouthful of food with more than one biteThis is dumb. If you don't wanna use chink sticks just pick it up with fingers and pop the whole thing in your mouth. No sushi should take multiple bites, and that fork is just fucking it up.
>>220758290Who the fuck is moot
Why not make your own sushi? Isn't it like 3 ingredients and you just roll it up in a mat then cut it into slices?
>>220758334It's finger good anyway
>>220758232>Fucking cellphones trying to swim laps in this temple
>>220758110Another bowl of ginger snacks, chef! Don't be stingy with the kikkoman and there's a whole American dollar in it for you
>>220758653Keep seasoning your meat with fire then mr fancy pants. Just don’t call it rustic.
I always gotta bring my own ketchup mustard and ranch because not a single sushi place I have been to has them. I understand it's not normal but you gotta serve your customers what they want.
>>220759561I'm sure the concept is supposed to be ragebait, but if someone has to put ketchup on everything I would just assume they're genuinely autistic and not draw attention to it.
>>220759584Really? I would scream about how they were disturbing the delicate umami balance, and rip their stupid bicycle helmet off their head. Not in this temple buckaroonie! It’s a quiet and peaceful place. Very contemplative. Zen.
>>220759002the owner of ytmnd
>>220758110>>220758116Shut the fuck of Wags
>>220758280>mfw onions espanol
>>220758153
>>220759561I prefer thousand island on 'shi
Sushi kind of sucks right? It's one of those things where everyone's just pretending?
>>220758163I will literally fuck your wife while eating sushi in this manner and you will watch like the tiny autistic bitch you are.
Meanwhile the ocean is dying due to Japanese over fishing
>>220758153I use ketchup and some honey mustard usually and always drink a root beer float
>/tv/ - Hollywood Slop, Gook Shill & Anti-Japan (Sushi)Circlejerkare u proud
Nips and weebs are exhausting.
>>220759879You can go to /jp/ if you want a weeb safe space.
>>220758110 >>220758116Great tips... on how to become the perfect japucucku.
>>220760036lmao why would I? You are probably obsessed with Japan and weeb shit but I'm notfucking pathetic bro
>>220760011ironic
>meanwhile...american cuisine
Chnkgooks and mutts make 8 anti-japan threads per day on fucking /tv/ when nobody asked and say they are tired of Japs and weebs They unironically have zero self-awareness
>>220760124You will never be Japanese, SEAnigger
>>220760124>Japan>not thinking about the United States Sure thing bud.
>>220758110>>220758116Zoomer meme food.
>>220758110I'm eatin' it with a fork and some ketchup and there ain't a damn thing you can do about it you fruity little fuck!
>''why the hell are you letting japan live in your head rent free?''>''s-shut up, weeb!''I have serious gaijin fatigue. Japan has literally nothing to do with your life.
>>220758110Fucking shitposts. In this temple?
>>220758454
>>220760361berry berry onoraburu samurai. you have bushido in your heart and you fight for grorious nippon.
>>220758110>>220758116I thought this was Jim Jefferies.
>>220759879Yes. Yes I am.
>>220759822Death before dishonour. I’d banzai charge you in the restaurant, accepting that you had already killed me. >>220759859This is the single worst thing I have ever read. Protect me Jiro Sama! >>220760297Even discounting the ketchup, which I already covered, the fork ruins the delicate balance or aromas with a metallic after taste. Better to season it naturally with the oils from your own fingertips.
>>220759793Sort of. When it’s well done it has a nice, fresh clean taste. But it’s not really a meal. It’s the same idea as tapas. Finger food where you can sample lots of different options. The main problem with traditional sushi is all the options are like salmon, tuna, yellow tail or fattier salmon. So once you’ve had some good sushi, it’s all the same. The real meme is yuppies having it every weekend, and stores being everywhere. Oh and the 27 years of training needed to learn to wash rice and cook egg bullshit. That’s all a sales pitch. Clearly works on white women though. Japs let them load up their sushi with avocados and that awful kewpie mayo (their favourite things!) and pretend it’s “traditional”. The whole thing’s a mess.
>muh raw fish and rice>muh grilled meat>muh big bowl of brown slop with noodles
Wait… people actually eat the shreds of ginger between bites? The flavor is way too strong to be a palate cleanser. I might have a bite after the meal but always throw 90% of the pile of ginger away
>>220761728You should treat sushi like a ceremony. There are steps involved if you want to enjoy it optimally as the Japanese do. You don't just shovel it into your mouth like a westoid barbarian.
>>220761752This. The ginger is too strong, and it does taste bad. But eating it is what a Samurai would do. Yosh. That’s why l have my manbun and this sick Oni tattoo. I got it at this really cool tattoo parlour. Real hole in the wall place. And that wall? Exposed. Red. Brick.I’m fucking jacked dude. Let’s get another sake!
>don’t dip the rice in the sauce!>do some complicated maneuver to get sauce on another part of it instead of the most convenient and obvious optionI’ve tasted nigiri without sauceI’ve tasted nigiri with sauce on topI’ve tasted nigiri with the rice dipped in sauceThe rice dipped is far far superior, the Japanese are retarded about this
>>220761671I will behead you, civilian.
>>220761752>You don't just shovel it into your mouth like a westoid barbarianI genuinely don't know how to not do this. What else are you supposed to do when sitting in front of a plate of food but eat it? I'm always shoveling my meal down like I dont know when I'll see food next and sitting around impatiently waiting for everyone else to finish as a result
why are gaijins so bad at separating fiction from reality in general?
>>220761657There's a place near me that does a lot of unique sushi that's pretty mint. I love going there trying the different stuff
>>220758116It was eel sauce meant for that type of sushi It was an inside joke
>>220758232The funniest part is that we're supposed to be siding with Ricky Gervais here
>>220761657>But it’s not really a meal. It’s the same idea as tapas.Only in amerilardia. You don't need to scarf down 2000 kcal per meal. You can have a 12-piece sushi meal and be more than full enough.
>>220761906It’s literally supposed to be >>220761943with eel sauce which is what he was doing It was an inside joke making fun of nipboos
All those rules for a litlle rice with fish kek, japanese are bunch of faggots
I buy $8.50 cucumber rolls from the grocery store premade by overweight Chinese immigrants, guzzled down with six cans of Stella Artois to briefly distract me from the fact that I haven’t had a job in two years because my government let in millions of Indians and tanked the economy. I’ll put fucking the onions sauce on it if I want to.
>>220761943>you can have a 400 cal meal and be more than full enoughBig doubt on that one. Sushi is fit for the culturally stagnant and overly ritualized culture that produced it and children.
>>220762002One piece of sushi is 80 to 120-ish kcal depending on toppings, for a 12-piece you're already around 1000kcal at least. I know that's nothing compared to the average Amerishart 4pm snack, but in actual 1st world nations that's basically a cheat meal for anyone who's even moderately healthy.
>>220758232Billions ended up being pretty gay but the first 2 seasons are kino and he was one of the best characters. He's supposed to be a whacko he's the wild card.
>>220761943>>220762030seething SEAnig posts
>>220762030It'll never cease to make me laugh how much the rest of the world seethes over the good ol' us of a
>>220762054>>220762041>barely above Spain>below fucking EstoniaLMFAO
>>220762030>80 to 120-ish kcal depending on toppingsI don't know what kind of calorie counting you are doing but every resource I'm looking at puts sushi rolls at between 23 and 56 calories per roll depending on the topping.
>>220758234i would kill myself if i were you, but i have a sense of honor.
>>220762063You don't get it. The fact ur looking up stats and trying to dunk on people online you don't know is what people are laughing at.
>>220762087Caring about newfags now is like going to bombay and complaining about the amount of Indians. We are long gone.
>>220762093No it's not Gary. What the entire world is laughing at is your shithole country and its population still living in the delusion that we never left the 1950's and you're still the world superpower.
>>220762030I'm a 198cm tall Swedish man. I can't survive on little balls of rice made for diminutive asian peasants and I would drop dead from shame if I engaged in the masturbatory ritualized behavior they feel the need to surround every aspect of life with.
>>220762124>using Gary as an insultPajeet spotted
The funny thing is, Japs didn't say anything.Mutts made a documentary about Jiro and are offended. They put this sushi scene in their tv slop and are offended.Chinks and gooks run most suchi places in the US and are offended.It's hard not to see them as subhumans tbqh
>>220762168saar
>>220762124The world has a very warped perception of general American perception because they are also indoctrinated by t's media. You often take all the extremes without realizing America is a culmination of everyone and it's what every country will eventually be like because of immigration and anti nationalism
>>220762145Biggu waitu piggu. Justu biggu talgetu. Horudo stirru.
>>220758110I like to throw the sushi in a bowl, mix it and add some ketchuip
>>220762753Try microwaving some frozen peas and adding them to the bowl. It really brings out the umami.
>>220762753pig FUCK
>>220762145You are big. That means you have big dick and make big shits. Suck and eat your dick and shits. Suck and eat until it is done.
>>220758110Chill out, Mr. Miyagi
>Be scandi>Mother is old and therefore racist>Take her to a sushi restaurant>She believes miso is traditional nord food so it's okay to eat>Keeps eyeballing my sushi, always comments multiple times how it is weird to eat raw fish and she would not do this>Fourth time, she eyeballs sushi as usual>"May I try some?">Of course, dearest sweet mother, take any piece you like! I recommend the soft shell crab, it is delicious!>She grabs tuna futomaki>Puts it on her plate>Tries to spear it with chopsticks>Oh, heh, not like that mother you use the- You know what just- just use your fingers>She starts pushing into it flat with a stick trying to cut it in two>Okay, no, listen to me stop, just put it in your mouth with your fingers, this is not okay.>"But I can't finish a whole piece.">THEN WHY DID YOU TAKE THE FUT- Listen, just bite off the piece you want and leave the->She obliterates the sushi with the stick>She picks up a pinch of assorted ingredients>Puts it in her mouth>Immediately spits it into a napkin, speedrun %any, took less than a second>"No that's not for me.">Eyeballs my sushi and insults it for the rest of the meal as being ethnic>I have not taken her to one of my haunts since>That was 8 years ago>Still think about it
If I'm paying for it i can eat it however i want, fucker
>>220763408>he could kill them with his bare hands
>>220763469I slide my finger down my buttcrack in full view of the chef then eat his overpriced low quality sushi
>>220758110>>220758116instructions on how he handles cock
>>220761906Wait... what was Gervais take on this scene?
>>220763469if it takes 10 years to learn how to make an egg, they should have stopped doing it
>>220758232
>>220758110It's not onions sauce it's onions sauce
>>220763545It's not just food preparation. It's an art. Japan splices art into just about every aspect of daily life. The west could learn a thing or two about beauty from Japan.
>>220758116And people say that Italians are annoying about their food. Holy shit
>>220758110So>waitress puts fish in front of you>pick it up and eat it>don’t play games with it, flip it, or dunk it and try not to let anything fall offSame rules as a cheeseburger. Got it.Not hard. Doesn’t merit a psychotic break.
>>220763469Unfunny Miyagi have spoken.
holy fuck gaijins are really like eternal 13 year olds
>>220764409>comparing sushi painstakingly prepared by a master of his art to a slopburger
>>220764511>gaijinsYou will never be Japanese, SEAmonkey.
>>220758110>>220758232>>220763469He is right, they invented noodles, they know what they are doing
>>220763798ahahaha do you understand japs can't even complain about american fake sushi made by chinks and gooks?it's racist to call them out. gaijins live in a fantasy.
>>220758153This and I dip it rice side down so it absorbs as much sauce as possible and drink beer along with it. And gimmie some gyoza, kara-age and tempura on the side.
>>220763587>It's an artIt's an omelette. What can they possibly do to it that takes 10 years to learn? You can learn an actual art form in half the time
>>220763408>it was real in my mind
>>220764534???Do you not know anything about borger? The borger chef spends 10 years JUST flipping the patty before he is allowed to assemble borger, he is not middle manager until he is 30 years old!!
My girlfriends parents are taking us to a nice all you can eat sushi place today bros and I've never been. What do I do? What do I order? Can I actually use onions sauce?
>>220766810OP is unironically good etiquette.
>>220766810Whatever you get, order it well done. They tend to undercook things.
I am the only one in this thread that can properly post the word onions.
what's up with all the onions shit. it's this some zoomer slang for onions
>>220766810bow to the room when you enter; bow to the room when you leave.
>>220758110Do Japs really put onions on their raw fish?
>>220767529You've been peeled, son
>>220762192>America is a culmination of everyone and it's what every country will eventually be like because of immigration and anti nationalismBritain is generations ahead in that regard.
>>220758110>Flavor it with onions sauce>Don't dip sushi rice into onions sauce>you really don’t need to also add onions
>>220759561The customer is always right
>>220766810Just follow the OP video's advice and ask the chef if you're doing anything wrong while you're eating it.
>>220763587anon tokyo looks like a bulgarian scrap yard
>>220767838Britain has less blacks (8%) and non-whites in general (around 18%) than the US. What the fuck are you talking about?
>>220765918>What can they possibly do to it that takes 10 years to learn?Its painfully obvious you dont know, and it fucking shows.
only subhumans eat raw meatwe invented the fire 6 gorillion years ago and you barbarians want to go back eating animals raw
>>220760114So that's what he's doing since Chelsea fired him
>>220763469Nuke em' again
>>220768979Not only that but they eat it with sticks
I'm never going to eat raw fish.
>>220758110>>220758116If you're still eating it with rice, and not just eating Sashimi, you're already basically a lower middle class hick.Just eat a maki roll with your hands like a burrito at that point.
>>220766810>all you can eat sushi place>niceI like those places for a cheap fix but I doubt it's anything remotely special
>>220758232>caring so much about something that's just gonna turn into poop in a few daysI love Chinese food as much as the next guy, but come on.
>>220770683Imagine being so poor that "all you can eat" only means poverty food like cicis pizza. People who weren't born in barns have been to a Four Seasons brunch.
>>220768979Japanese meat is perfectly safe to eat raw. Eggs too. Japan actually has food standards and you don't get sick if you eat raw meat there.
>>220763469>some japanese sushi chefs still haze their apprentices with 10 years to make tamago>because of this, there is a series of rules you must follow >they aren’t actually rules and no one will stop you>overall, I agree with the depiction of someone having a meltdown and calling other people “fucking heathens” in a restaurant>it’s because we Japanese have a deep respect This guy needs some sense slapped into him.
it's honestly impressive how dirty and cowardly gaijins can bei can't help but undersrand hy japan had to choose the war against the anglo-ruled world
have some shame, gaijinsunironically
>>220762025I look like this and I do this.
>>220771015Obviously you know nothing about Bushido
>>220763408Let’s put aside whether he could kill them for a second. >in a perfect world, he would kill them. And in a perfect world, everyone would understand. Holy fucking shit. And this is for incorrect condiment application. Too much wasabi on the rice and fish. The punishment? Death. To be carried out summarily by a brutal barrage of martial arts techniques. The famous open mind of the Japanese people and their Western appreciators everyone! Fuck me dead. It they weren’t all five foot nothing, I’d be scared to go to one of their restaurants.
>>220771063Please, enlighten me.
>Open ketchup bottle >Squirt half of it over the sushi>Stab it with one of the chopsticks and eat it like a marshmellow
>small glob of wasabi on the fish>press a slice on ginger into that>dip the rice in onions sauce and enjoythat's how I do it at my local kinoplex, anyhow.
>>220771148Surely you mean half of one of those little ketchup sachets. The ones you get for a meat pie or a sausage roll or such. Half a whole bottle, even a small one, on a single ngiri!? I just don’t think it’s possible.
>>220758232>*pulls out emergency ketchup bottle from back pocket and gives it a nice dollop*
>>220771189This is pretty good I think. You get all the presented flavours together, and they balance well. If they don’t want you using the ginger as a condiment, it should only be brought out in tiny quantities as a pallet cleanser between servings.
>>220771025>>220771045YWNBJ
>>220762030bros eating those double coated tempura fried rolls soaked in spicy mayo lol
>>220758110Sushi rolls should be wrapped in a foil package so I can pop a piece like a mentos
you shouldn't be proud of your ''win'' by spamming the same anti-japan threads for 10000 timeswhy can't gaijins understand anything like that
>>220764578Lads... I NEED to fuck a skinny, assless, titless, flat-faced Japanese bitch IMMEDIATELY.
>>220771328Go back to /jp/ SEAnig
>>220758110>Sushi>Cheese curds>GravyCanuckinese
>>220762753I find it hard to eat, so I just throw my ushi between two slices of texas toast, press it to get all the air out (air is empty calories), and go to town. And, if you make a sushi sandwich, you get your choice of sauces!
>>220758110>If you are using sticks he says you should think of the sushi as a “portable shrine” - the sticks are the shrine’s “carrying poles”.Turns out I dream of beating Jiro until he pisses blood. Huh.
>>220771310I bet he still thinks it makes him >culturalprobably says >itadakimasubefore his fat ass tucks in
>>220766810If you tell them its your first time eating sushi, they are legally allowed to sell you to the restaurant on a feudal apprenticeship contract.
>>220771339go for it man. you’ll have no competition from me.
>>220771148My sushi bully caught me doing that and beat me up. Now I have to cover my hands in ketchup before I enter the restaurant.
>>220768933Hello everyone, I’m this poster’s mother. Firstly, I have some bad news. He was raped to death by pakis. So he won’t see any replies. Now, I want you to know he always talked about his four channel friends! Please don’t bother responding to me either. I am about to be arrested for a non crime hate incident (acknowledging how my son died). Thank you for being there for my son right up until the pakis showed up.
>puts slice of raw fish onto a block of plain boiled rice>that will be 90 dorra gaijin-sanWhat did he mean by this?
>>220771482>you get your choice of sauces!What you having? For me, I like a mix of kecap manis and sweet chilli. I’m real traditional like that. Keep it oriental you know.
>>220770821>in a few daysI'd shit it out in as little as 12 hours
Precisely sauced raw fish... my nemesis...
>>220771751
>>220771847I've never understood this. Do you keep it in the fridge to persevere the jam, or the cupboard to make the peanut butter pliable?
>>220771874Glove compartment of car, of course. Gotta have that road smuckers ready.
>>220771874You’re crazy to imply this lasts long enough for that to be an issue. I spread it on THICK, triple decker sandos
>>220771639>he still has a sushi bullyWhat is this? 2012?
>>220771581
>it's still going onholy shit man
>>220759793Its literally fish on rice
>>220760124Yeah. Im sure the japs aren't seething at all that jpop and japanese movies were replaced by korean equivalents on the world stage and no one buys toyotas anymore and instead they buy hyundais and chink cars. Remember when all electronics were sony and panasonic? And now it's all samsung, lg, huawei, xiaomi...
>>220771015what he's describing is basic manners for their certain country. It's not that deep. It's not illegal to blast music on a boombox on public transport, but you just don't do it.>"I can do whatever I want"grow up and change your soiled diaper
>>220775633Blasting music loudly in a publicity place is irritating. Anyone who is upset to the same degree that I quietly enjoy my lunch with the “wrong” condiments needs to be involuntarily committed to a psychiatric ward until the state can determine what’s causing their delusional worldview.
>>220771102to be fair, if a jap killed some guy over rice and wasabi it would be pretty funny. Better than getting shot to death by rampaging criminals.
>>220758280Fucking weeaboo!
>>220758153my asian friends showed me that in high school and I've done it the same way ever since. Are you not supposed to do it that way?
>>220776134I agree. The more he moved like was from a martial arts movie the funnier it would be too. Imagine he did that autistic pose samurai always do in movies after cutting someone, when they swing the sword at thin air, then pause dramatically before putting it away. My fucking god that would be the most fucking cringe kino thing ever if a sushi chef was caught doing that on camera after he stabbed a white pig 87 times for separating the rice from the fish then eating each in more than one bite.
>>220773889This. If you like fish and rice it can be nice, but a hot seafood stir fry will always be better.
>>220771847>>220771895
>>220771324Don’t you think they need to be kept cold though?
>>220758232Customers aren't supposed to initiate a bow to the host you fucking ignorant baka gaijin
>>220758153For me it's ranch
>>220758116>A piece of well made sushi should fit into the mouth in one bite, as Jiro says, “it should be roughly 6 centimetres long.”I think that the reason that Jiro has nightmares of ass rape is that he’d discover how much more than 6cm his mouth could fit. Try closer to 7”, and a bit more down the back of the throat! And of course that’s just for starters. A little amuse-bouche, if you will. Open up Jiro. You’ll find it’s already perfectly seasoned.
>>220770821this, i just eat rotting garbage from the dump, who fuckin cares
>>220758409I never eat a single food that can’t be stabbed with a fork before I convey it to my pie hole. At most I will cut it into bite sized pieces and then put the knife down and take the fork in my right hand. Sushi is great, because the chefs at my local sushi train already have it in little bite sized pieces. They don’t stock forks, but no one has ever complained when I bring my own from home. Yes the rice cubes shatter a bit and it does make a mess of crumbs. But the serving girls always clean it up. They’re a very obliging and docile people. I’ve also heard their women are very obedient, and all the girls at my local have tight little bodies. That’s why I keep going back you see. The fish is alright, but I’m after some digits to get a different kind of sea food dish! You know what I’m saying boys? You picking up what I’m putting down? You feeling me? Peace!
>>220771191>The ones you get for a meat pie or a sausage roll or suchthis is an australian thing, they dont do this in america and such. you get a squeeze packet, not those folding gushers.they also dont really do meat pies as gas stations and shit, its actually the first thing i get when i fly over, a proper servo shitass meat pie and a can of gods gift to our world, the nectar called "v" (sugar free)
>>220763469I'm so tired of cooking cunts pretending they do some extraordinarily ultra complex work. 10 years to learn to make an egg dish? People become surgeons from nothing in 10 years. You can become a master of science in less than 10 years. Imagine how retarded you have to be to require 10 years of training to cook an egg. I fucking hate chefs. The most pretentious larping diddy foid profession in the world
>>220775633You have the same level of sensory annoyance from someone who blasts music in public transport as from someone who dips their egg roll into a onions sauce? What a dork and non-argument
>>220777108No you don’t understand! Timing the flip on the omelette is so difficult it’s literally harder and takes more time to learn than brain surgery or rocket science! That’s why we all make minimum wage and take our breaks in the alleyway out back, slav squatting with a cigarette while it drizzles on us.
>>220777034Firstly, fuck that sounds miserable, not even being able to get a decent low grade beef servo pie with two squeeze sachets of masterfoods! I’d go fucking spare. Secondly, I was with yah till you chose sugarfree v. Original red Mother is right next to it in the cabinet. It’s way better and I am throwing down the gauntlet over this. If you feel you need satisfaction from me, then next time you swing back by Brisvegas (if you can spare time for me, Me Globetrotter) we can have a punch on over this issue of honour. I’ll schedule it in me diary. I should be free. Tommorow I have the official “results meeting” from “workplace investigation” over my last punch on. So I’ll be back on the dole with my days free for sporting and leisure and sampling local cuisine. Which, by the way way? Better be bloody cooked through unless it’s a steak. Medium rare in that case, or I’ll bottle you when I’m done with my Tooey’s Old. Anyway, don’t keep me waiting. I don’t like too much down time between me sporting events. Helps me stay lean, mean and keen so I can chase that green.(I am going to take your wallet after I have king hit you outside a Dan Murphy’s).
>>220777548shoulda been a victoria bitters, lel. also sausage rolls isnt a thing in the states either. you CAN get them frozen at the grocery store, but its not the same if it hasnt been sitting in unwashed filthy industrial heater for 4 hours. its grim. or anzac cookies, but that one makes sense.
>>220763798Italian food actually tastes good
>>220763798ask americans about steak sometime. they fucking flip if you dont leave it partially raw. shits fucking weird
>>220777631Vb is tastes like piss left in a tin can till the metal’s leached into it mate.
>>220763387>be scandistopped reading right there. don't care for the opinions of non-whites
>>220758110Im crying laughing reading this threadThanks guys
kek yeah it's fucking funny how americans complain more about imaginally sushi rules than thier own country bombing schools
>>220760114seething weeb
you rule the media, you still occupy japan, and yet you guys are the most pathetic and spoiled babies in the world
>>220777759thats why it would of been funny, ya dingus. you gotta make as many people think its an actual australian beverage australians actually drink, just to fuck with them. im ALWAYS telling people that koalas eat only eucalyptus leaves, and sweat eucalyptus oil, and will literally explode like firebombs in forest fires, that they will just run screaming at you on fire escaping a fire and BOOM. dont care how inaccurate it is, or if it even is. its just funny lmao
>>220759859lol prob cuz im drunk but this post got me super hard imagining someone at his restaurant watching tik tok on their phone while loudly and messily just dunking all the sushi into ketchup brought from home
>>220777936>we make 30 anti-japan threads everyday but we no seething >you seething because you make fun of america
>>220778140does anyone understand what this guys seething about
>>220778140i'm not american or jap. keep seething weeb faggot
>>220778236don't worry, chinkgooks and other subhumans are spiritually american
>>220778161do you only think about who is seething or not
>>220778288do you ever think about doing anything besides seething
>>220778273not one of then either :) anyway i'm out to drop fat loads in japanese whores, stay seething weeb faggot
>IM NOT SSETHING I SWEARR>THATS WHY JAPAN LIVE RENT FREE IN MY HEAD!!!lol lmao even
>>220778305imagine thinking this is clever
>>220778317>other subhumanscan't you even read? jesus christ
>>220778329kek. seethe about it
>>220778336>other subhumansare you talking about your ethnicity? can't be me because my ancestry is GOATED
>>220778339you need to realize you sound like a literal 14yo third world ronaldo fan>u seethe me won
>>220778351it's okay, not everyone can read. what are you, a poor greek?
>>220778376thats a you problem. good luck lmao
>>220763469Fucking sushi is such pseud food, holy fuck.
>>220778409ahahaha the classic ''no u''. that's exactly what i was talking about, anon. so fucking predictable and boring
Jiro nightmares of ass rape
>>220778436lel
>>220778422>let me judge your country based on tiktok video>hmm it's pesud as fuckthe irony
>>220758110>>220758116it's raw fish with rice lil bro
>>220778472ahaha yeah i think that's enough for you
>>220778489no no, ill accept any type of seething you want to sputter, im pretty much free all afternoon. please, continue.
>ching chong ping pong for some reason we still cannot get over inferiority complex towards japan that's literally all you are saying
>>220778509are you some kind of insane chinese canadian or something? i hope you can grow out of eternal ''u mad'' ''no u'' someday m8
>>220758334>The idea of a white American using chopsticks is completely fucking retardedThis guy's still upset the waitress made him some cheaters with a rubber band that one time.
>IM 100% SURE WE AINT SEETHING BUT YOU ARE!!!>NO NO NO NO THATS YOU!reminds me of mutts and chinks on /int/
>>220778596lol, nope. any other seething for me?
>>220778477The irony? He was right.
>>220778629I think everyone ITT is seething. Some of you are hiding it behind quips, but you’re all seriously bent out of shape. It’s MAD it’s still going. It’s just raw fish on rice. It’s nothing special.
>>220778832This.Italian food shits on crapanese food from such a height that it'd think god itself has crapped on it
why is /tv/ like this
>>220761906i've only seen this scene in isolation, i can't even tell you what show it's from. i thought it was meant to be satire
>>220777971I wasn’t trying to be funny. I like the original red cans of mother, and toohey’s old. You disagreed with me, and now I am gonna commit the crimes of aggravated assault and battery upon your person.That’s as much a fact as all the information you’re spreading about our beautiful flora and fauna. Onya for that one. Because of that I won’t kill yah. But I’m afraid you’ll still have to hold still while I glass you.There wasn’t a single image of that that didn’t feature a VB, and mate, if you think I was riled up before!
>>220777978>his post got me super hardimagining someone at his restaurant watching tik tok on their phone while loudly and messily just dunking all the sushi into ketchup brought from homeand why did that give you an erection exactly?
11When dipping ngiri into shoyu, dip the neta, not the shari.Many gaijin put too much shoyu on their ngiri. The reason is that they dip the shari into the shoyu sauce. If you dip the shari into the shoyu sauce, not only will the shari absorb too much shoyu, which unbalances the umami and brings great dishonour, but the shari will also become easier to crumble. When putting shoyu on ngiri, try to put the shoyu on the neta.
>>220779607lmao tl:dr + reddit posting
A little bbq sauce is really nice on most sushi, try it you'll see!
>>220779932Drop an addy cunt
>>220758232https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bDL8yu34fz0
>>220760114>You dont drink cola with this.>???>It is already precisely corn syrup'd
i hate people who are like this AND i hate people who go out of their way to eat food like retards just to piss off people who are like thisfuck italians and fuck people who snap the pasta in half or add cream or peas to carbonara
>>220780098You are in conflict within yourself.
>>220779957Regular or smokey?
>>220779959washington state lmao
>>220780491Fuck. Can I interest you in an expensive plane trip to Brisbane Queensland, so I can king hit you?
>>220780785oh god damn it you actually are near me
>>220758110>4 - Flavor it with onions sauceSo that's his secret? Just getting you to taste store bought onion sauce and claiming it's his sushi that tastes so good?
>>220758110This is my favourite modern /tv/ meme
>>220780808Up for a punch on then, you dog cunt?
>>220780947nah
>>220758116>“There’s nothing more delicious than sushi that has just been placed on your plate,” says the master.Oh? Nothing?
>>220758232>all this dogshit just because he's some nerdy nigger that went to asia to fuck asian women
>>220780978gratuitously doused in onions sauce, of course
>>220780959Coward. I woulda told yah I was gonna king hit yah, then I still would’ve done it. They call me the slippery gypsy.
>>220763469How about you respect your fucking customers who got served under sauced food and are just trying to correct your mistakes?
>>220781015you let them call you gypsy?
>>220781024fuckin ay. you take that steak back there and make it WELL done, and bring me the bottle of ketchup while your at it, ya fuckin wagey chefs
Sushi is the most overrated food ever. Japan has loads of great food but sushi isn't one of them. The best steak I've ever tasted was in Tokyo.
>>220762124Meanwhile you know literally everything about us, constantly looking up statistics and ranting about us, and we know absolutely NOTHING about the shit hole you come from. That's all the proof you need that we are the world's superpower and you are a speck in the ocean. You need to constantly think about us and focus on us and what we're doing, because it's important to you and affects your daily life. We don't even consider / remember that you exist because it doesn't affect us whatsoever. You and your entire nation of mudbabbies could be blown off the face of the Earth and it wouldn't even register on our radar. If it weren't for fellow residents of your shithole reminding us that it exists and are perpetually seething about our superiority and power, we wouldn't even know about it. That's the fundamental difference. That's why you will eternally be seething about America and I will literally forget your shit hole exists in 20 minutes when I'm at my job, making more money than you could ever dream of, paying for access to luxeries and care you couldn't even imagine.
>>220781033Yeah it’s funny. It’s from Borat.
>>220758454>can't opened mouth larger because of bucc fat removal surgery and botoxed cheeks/lipsgrim
>>220781053sushi is fucking deliciousI find the people that hate on it are usually niggers with skewed taste buds that had to use too many spices due to eating low quality dog/horse meat
>>220758454>white woman eats using utensil in only way she knows is appropriate >I'm supposed to be madAnything that makes foreigners seethe is good practice.
>>220758409Why the fuck would you use two little sticks like a dumbass? Are you brown? Some kind of subhuman retard? White people figured out forks like 2000 fuckin years ago. Who cares what fucking savages do in their own country.
>>220781203nigga shes in a restaurant, she could literally just look at the person next to her
>>220781225>we figured out training wheels YEARS agokek
>>220781203ytfolx be evil
Hey guys OP here. I’m sorry I made this thread in retrospect.
>>220781236For what? Why should she bother?>>220781249>>220781252You lost.
>>220781249You will never be Japanese, SEAmonkey.
>it's still going on holy shit get a life
>>220781284>white kids have some fun>don't hurt anyone>I'm supposed to be pissed on behalf of foreigners who hate meYeah, don't care. Hope they go back and do it again.
>>220781297Yeah! Zap those japs!
>>220768970>Admits ignorance to whatever nonsense this hazing ritual is meant to provide>It's obvious to me that you're ignorant of what this hazing ritual providesYou don't fucking say
>>220781265eh, at the end of the day shes an american, so i can understand why they would provide forks. they have "do not lick" stickers on graphics cards out there, after all
>>220758232Even just seeing this actor's photo make's me cringe now. That scene ruined his entire career (rightfully).
>>220770821That is exactly why they care so much, they're compensating.>>220771768t. Hindoonian. You should only shit twice a week, max.
>>220764578If you come around here, I make 'em all day. I get one done in a second if you wait.
>>220777971delete this post, that's how my mom died
