What would you have wished for?PROTIP: Your wish WILL backfire in someway shape or form.
>>221264261>I wish the jewish people continue to exist
my dad to come back to life, in good health with his memories intact.(i didn't like him that much, so i'm not bothered if the wish gives him brain damage or one week to live or some shit.)
>>221264261i wish for every and any power i want with the ability for it to last as long as i want including turning it off for as long as i want, with no downsides
>>221264308I'd wish for this guys dad to die again.
>>221264261$1.4 trillion with no strings attached.
If you know it's going to backfire, you shouldn't wish for anything.
I wish for a wish that won't backfire in some shape or form.
>>221264261I wish that anyone else who ever make a wish that it doesn't back fire for them.Thats the kind of guy I ampay it forward
>>221264261It can backfire?!I wish I knew that earlier.
>>221264276>somehow, in some unknowable way, jews spend the rest of eternity in some sort of living hell, unable to dieBased
To become a demon prince of Khorne
>>221264261big titty asian wife
I wish I was a cute girl :333
>>221264709It's a loan and you have to pay it back.>no strings attachedAt no point where these dollar bills ever tied up or hole punched then suspended with string.
Did you guys realize that the girl behind the desk of the shop selling the willows turned herself into a MAN?
>>221264890>It's a loan and you have to pay it back.I burn the money and kill myself, it was just a deflation scam all along.
>>221264924I kneel
>>221264261I wish my gf became a giantess.
>>221264261I wish to be incredibly charismatic, being able to befriend any men or seduce any women I want.
>>221265203Granted. But during the process, she accidentally crushes you under her foot and kills you instantly.>>221264880You're now a cute girl. However, your mother forces you into acting, and you end up being repeatedly molested by Hollywood executives.>>221264875Granted. But she’s is a massive slut who cheats on you constantly.
>>221265472I thought the wishes are supposed to backfire.
>>221265472>But during the process, she accidentally crushes you under her foot and kills you instantly.Booooooo, this sucks! He must live with consequences.
>>221265472>hot slut who cheats on mevs. >nothing at all, forever and ever until Im deadI guess Ill take it
I wish for a highly contagious and extremely lethal virus to be released in the major cities of Africa, India, and the Middle East. People with blue or green eyes are fully immune, but they can still carry and spread the virus to others.
>>221264261I wish people who made monkey paw threads were actually good at writing monkey paw outcomes.>Your wish is granted but now words are actually bullets and those word bullets are out for revenge against you for turning them into bullets.
I have thought about how to get around genies curses as well as getting the most out of a wish. I will share my conclusions with /tv/ in case you ever find yourself in this situation.Don’t ever try to get a wish to give you exactly what you want. Instead, make up an abstract state of being where you control what you want and wish for that. For example, define “shimshlam” as a state where you can make any woman fall in love with you as much as you will it + plus you get as much money in the bank as you will it + plus you have a save and load system like a video game, all of which can be adjusted at will. Then, wish yourself to go into that state. You get full control over your wish, can get multiple things out of one wish, factor in consequences to your wishs, ect.>t. schizo that think genies are real and genie wishes are responsible for mandela effects
>>221266835how many lamps ya rubbed?
I want to be able to make anyone violently and immediatley shit their pants upon eye contact with me.(This also includes myself if I ever look into a mirror again.)
>>221264261>I wish that my wish will backfire. Checkmate
>>221264261I wish all mental illness to be cured
>>221264261No one is going to ask how this item is legal to sell given the implications that follow?No one is going to call the better business bureau about this?My word, /television/...
>>221266835Genie, I wish that permanently online milennials collectively misremembers the spelling of berenstain and thinks means something supernatural
>>221264261I want my crush to love me unconditionally but she loves herself too.She would make a good wife will have many childrens and than she will love my children naturally until her demise.
>>221265472HotHotterHottest
I wish the actress Chase Infiniti was in romantic love with me, but not in an obsessive way
>>221266692You have a trillion dollars but also have aids
>>221264261I wish that nobody's wish backfired and for 3 more wishes.
>>221267513Done but you are a homosexual and the children are your aperm turds from a night at the sauna
>>221264261>GREATER ISRAEL
>>221264261I wish OP was a tapeworm in a waterbuffalo in deepest darkest africa.
>>221266692the replies are all now so top tier that you can't understand any of them and feel like an insecure retard when you see them
>>221264261I wish for every anon’s wish to be granted by the Wishmaster Djinni instead
>>221268122The wishmaster is now some clock punching asshole at TABI Cat Curiosities who is miserable with his life and personally blames you for it
>>221264720No you just make a "selfless" wish for someone you hate."I wish the Jews never had to worry about being gassed ever again."Demon granting wish is like, "MWHAHAHAHAAH!!! Okay, I'll make it so no Jew ever has to worry about being gassed ever again - by gassing them ALL now! That way there will be none left to worry about being gassed!!!! MWHAHAHAAHAHAAA! I'm so clever and evil!!!"
>>221268090you get greatest israel
>>221268151That which is an eternal asshole cannot find misery in inflicting it on others, sweet anon.
>>221268091Done but you have aids
>>221268020Done but you get aids
>>221268168your 23 and me results finally arrive and you're 98% ashkenazi and 2% mandingo
>>221264261I'd wish my shits would stop burning.
>>221268202And the downside to getting them all?
>>221268218you turds are now frozen solid as they pass through your colon an you shit turdcicles
>>221268256So basically you always got a shit on the go
I wish all for mad foxes all over me, and wild cougars to gobble my dick
>>221268273its like that level in mario 64but you also get a chapped butthole
>>221268273No more diarrhoea, just rapid-fire shit nuggets clattering against the bowl.
I wish that everything any negro man has ever wanted becomes reality and common sense right now.
>>221264261I wish Uwe Boll had directed this piece of trash because it couldn’t possibly be worse.
I would wish for the dalits from India, the civilians of North Korea, the population of Mecca, 50 % of women in China to disappear in the Thanos fashion but with the difference that they reappear in the fifth anniversary.
>>221268313Granted, but your eyes fall out
>>221264261The One Wish Willow isn't a Monkey Paw situation. If you're careful how you word the wish there aren't any downsides.
>>221268347thats exactly what a wishmaster would say
>>221268365It would be great if Andrew divoff who played that djinn plays Nikki's dad
>>221264261I wish to have sex with Bear.
>>221268411you're getting raped by a grizzly
>>221268477;_;
>>221268295well that one cannot backfire
>>221268365Except he'd be like>AHH ALEXA. MAKE. YOUR. WISHEZZZZ.
>>221268539>the Djinn is in the thread with us now
>>221268168Every horror movie says you'll be fucked no matter what. The demon knows you're trying to weasel your way out of it and fucks you over regardless.
>>221268477Finally my hours in Baldur’s gate have paid off
i'd wish to die instantly
>>221268411
>>221265387The real you is sent to wish hell dimension and Charismatic Anon gets to run around being charming in your body occasionally with you trying to regain control.
>>221264261I wish for the entirety of the world’s oceans to be turned into Chlorine Trifluoride, let’s see that fucker try to monkey paw me
>>221269126Hot.
>>221268201For my next 3 wishes, I wish I >1. was cured of AIDS>2. got AIDS again>3. eas cured of and immune to AIDS and 3 more wishes
>>221269198It comes true but your crush gets possessed by a bipolar demon
>>221264261I would wish to know if the girl I do everything for has literally even 1% of love for me because based on everything she says and does or doesnt, I believe she for some reason hates me and I have wasted years trying to show I love her genuinely, mentally, physically and financially.
>>221269748that's already my life
>>221269753Have you tried asking her?
>>221269753It sounds like you only have one option.First, get absolutely sick gains. Don’t care for aesthetics, just get muscle. Then, dye your hair red and shave it into a Mohawk.Then pick up an axe and die gloriously in battle slaying lanklet scum.It’s all you can do to redeem yourself at this point.
i want a billion dollars
Immortality
>>221264261The immediate complete and utter destruction of the illegitimate state of Israel and its people.>monkey's pawI'm an ethnic Jew, so that includes me. You're welcome faggots.
>>221268020>andYou only get one wish.
>>221270085>monkeys pawisrael becomes legitimate so no jew actually dies but all duel citizenships are expunged from the record so if you are jewish you need to move to israel
I wish for every nuke to go off at this very moment.
>>221268313>every negro has a new pair of Air Jordans>every negro is now a successful rapper, and their music is fucking terrible>every negro has a kilo of nigger skunkweed>every negro has unlimited EBT and free housing for lifeOh wait, they already have that last one.
>>221270112>duel citizenshipsGood thing I'm not a duelist. Did you forget I'm a kike? Out-fukken-skilled.
i wish for peace on earth.whoops
>>221270099And is a conjoining word so it was one wish and your a retard.
>>221270627Conjoining what? Two separate clauses.>your a retardYou're welcome for the English lesson, Rakhesh.
>>221264261Quick painless accidental death some time soon to spare the hurt of suicide to people that know me
>>221264875She has a fishhead and you get countersued by JP Morgan
>>221265472Not my problem
>>221267841who let the homeless guy sit next to her?
>>221269748Anon I just tuned the world oceans into CIF3, ain’t my problem
>>221270912came here to post this, may life be kind to us both in this one thing at least
>>221264261I wish all the jews were turned into anthro cows that want to fuck human men.
i wouldnt use it. id chuck this shit in the fucking trash.
>>221267841Granted, but her bubbly, fun personality was just a ruse, and she's a huge, vapid cunt behind the cameras. She also hates sex and refuses to fuck you.
>>221268411Charlie Kirk lookalike. It was distracting.
>>221264261A better film
>>221273764>Infiniti refuses to fuckWho said consent is involved?
>>221264261That I could go back in time to January 1st, 2013 the way I was and with the knowledge that I have now.
>>221264720>I wish for unlimited black coffee.>Q reshapes reality so that the only source of coffee is Neelix's anus.
I wish that you will not grant this wish.
Uhhpeace for israel :)
>>221271893How could it backfire in a "fair" monkey's paw way other than some complete bullshit like "actually you get tortured for eternity and your whole family dies lol"I suppose the cheap answer is "u go 2 hell 4 suicide"
>>221276343>>221270912Your "painless accidental death" is a massive meteor that completely decimates your city, killing not only you but everyone you know.But if you don’t live in the same city as your loved ones, or if you don’t care if they die with you: You blow yourself up while making a homemade explosive. Your family and friends assume you were planning a terrorist attack and are actually relieved you’re dead.
>>221267841HE WAS REVERSE ROIPPED!
Live in 1995-2005 in perpetuity
>>221264261To have the ability to open portals (which I can easily fit through) to any fictional universe I want, basically rick's portal gun without the gun part
>>221264261I wish there was no more ugly people, and everyone around now turns into 10/10 hot as fuck sexy beautiful people and ugly people never accidentally happen again in the future
>>221264261I wish all the indians in india and overseas died
>>221264276>indians take over your town and their taxes ensures israel's existence My wish is all indians, pakis, bangladeshis, nepalis, sikhs all explode in diarrhea at once with such force it alters the rotation of the earth making days 26 hours long
>>221278306Granted.They all explode, and the matter released creates a global pestilence, the likes of which mankind has never seen
I wish will smith reclaimed his manhood
I wish I didn't make any wish
>>221278459Granted, he takes yours.
I wish for exactly one trillion United States Dollars to be legally deposited into a newly created, fully insured, interest-bearing bank account under my sole legal name and exclusive ownership, subject to the following indemnification clauses:1: This currency must be 100% legal tender, newly and legally minted/printed by the United States Treasury specifically for this purpose, without causing inflation or devaluation of the US dollar. It must be completely tax-exempt, pre-cleared by all financial regulatory bodies (including the IRS and SEC), and recognized globally as legally acquired wealth with zero criminal or civil liability attached to its creation or transfer.2: The funds must exist digitally within the aforementioned secure bank account. No physical manifestation of this wealth (such as paper bills, coins, or bullion) shall appear on, near, or above my person, property, or any living being, unless explicitly withdrawn by me at a later date through standard banking procedures.3: he fulfillment of this wish must not cause, directly or indirectly, any physical, psychological, emotional, or financial harm, injury, illness, or death to myself, my family, my loved ones, or any innocent third party. Furthermore, the source of these funds must not be derived from the loss, theft, or destruction of any existing entity's property or well-being.4: The introduction of this wealth must be seamlessly integrated into the global economy without causing hyperinflation, market crashes, or economic instability. My possession of this wealth must remain entirely confidential, shielded from the public, media, and unwanted solicitation, unless I choose to disclose it.5: This wish must be executed instantly, permanently, and precisely according to my verbal and written intent, without any malicious side effects, subversion of meaning, or subsequent curses levied against my person, soul, mind, body, or destiny by the grantor.
>>221278567> I wish for exactly one trillion United States Dollars to be legally deposited into a newly created, fully insured, interest-bearing bank account under my sole legal name and exclusive ownershipGranted.>w-what?! I wasn’t finished! That’s not fair!Anon, we’ve been over this! Evil, remember?
>>221264308He comes back, but evil like in Pet Sematary.
>>221266912It was Mandela Effected into the universe. It was only around for a few days but affected people's memories into thinking it was a harmless toy from the 80s.Did you even watch the film?
>>221278567some nice autism u have there
>>221278567>ww3 starts immediately afterwards, the United States loses, and your USD is worthless
>>221278567Granted. You get the money with no downsides. You are happy and spend millions giving yourself the good life, quickly realizing there's no real happiness that comes from material possessions.With your money you move away from all your friends and family, seeing them as greedy poor slobs and want to live like a king instead.You consider donating money to others or charity but your trophy wife convinces you that you'll need the money for your children, before she eventually divorces you and takes most of it while turning your kids against you. You spend so much time away from your true interests that they become lost to you, and pine for the simple pleasures of your childhood, while mistakenly believing your misery comes from old age.You die a rich old man, but luckily you're still stuck in saṃsāra and damned to repeat life an infinite number of times, with your next cycle as a poor woman in india.Enjoy!
>>221278567Very nice. Fuck these Djinn, demon, monkey paw fucks.
>>221277400>Your family think you died planning a terrorist attackSo I die a hero too
>>221264261>please kill all turks
>I wish the holocaust never happened
>>221264261I wish to be an attractive biological woman.
>>221264261I wish I still had a full range of emotions.
>>221264261TLOU3It’s inevitable that it will come out screwed up already because Druckmann. The only way to screw it up is to not screw it up.
>>221281112>nothing changes
