>"If we got into it, I would f*ck you up. I would f*ck all three of you up”>“My favorite thing is people are like, ‘Oh, Jonah Hill, f*cking fat guy from Superbad.’ And I’m like, ‘I would f*cking annihilate you, dude. I’m not kidding you. Try it. If you see me, try it, dude. Bring it. Who’s got it?’”
>>222318147Jonah Hill vs Eliot Page. Winner gets to play Obama in a major motion picture
>What was that weather girl's name? Ophelia? Yeah whatever, I don't think about her anymore but I'd totally kick her ass. Bring it on, you frog bitch. Name the time and place.
>>222318147Kek he had to remember to mount at the end. Word to the wise, an actual fight isn’t a paint by numbers scenario
>>222318147i want to see jonah fight steven seagal https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MmEx8Moy7ro
>>222318323the best jonah could hope for is side character choom gang member
>>222318147It would be so fun to stuff this fat faggot’s takedown and drive a straight right through his nose just to see the shock on his face that he wasn’t able to win a real fight
I’m not some kind of tough guy, but what’s stopping me from just hammering someone’s face in while they try to get me into a gay sex position? Do they account for that in BJJ or is just training for competing with other BJJ martial artists?
>>222318754Correct. BJJ only works in a BJJ competition. Pure BJJ practitioners are famous for being terrible wrestlers, they can’t get a fight to the ground. Absolutely useless in a real fight unless you can sneak up behind someone and drag them down
>>222318147People like Jonah and this shitty coach are everything wrong with this sport. Shame on the fat, his coach and the guy who gave him a black belt.
>>222318147how come whenever I see a post on twitter, I see the exact same pst here moments later? Used to be that twitter got their content from here, now this place has nothing to say that wasn't ripped directly from twitter. I guess that's what happens when third worlders take over what white men created, huh?
>>222318147Karate is fake as fuck, it only became popular because of that overrated movie with Ralph Macchio in the 80's.
He's fucking up a black belt and you're laughing, do that on his next red carpet event and see what happens punks
>>222318890no, it's not, you clueless redditor
>>222318147I'm ashamed to say I was talked into trying ju jitsu and hated it but I got to take down and mount a fat woman so there was that
>>222318936BJJ is like cross fit. People who do it can’t shut the fuck up about it. They invite everyone to try like it’s some life changing experience to roll on a dirty mat with some loser’s crotch in your face. Then you get skin infections and joint damage
>>222318147Self proclaimed tough guys running their mouths about all the guys they're gonna ass kick usually get felled with one punch.Be more scared of the scrawny dude that stays silent during a provocation.
>>222318845It's good if you can combine it with wrestling plus stand up. Learning any one singular martial art is not enough
>>222318890That's really the worst shit isn't it. That movie was terrible. It really helped out the scrawny asian kids though. For decades kids would always say 'yeah but he could karate kick you' or some shit
>>222318980you sound like a civilian who went to a trial session and got tapped out by middle aged closet case guys for 2 hours and been seething ever since. many such cases!
>>222318147>jump into my guard, bro>ahh! ahh! you can't kick a downed opponent! ahh!
Fat people have strength and rage, meanwhile skinny tv/pol incels would get bodied in one shot before the fat guy runs out of breath, I beat up so many of you skinny manlets in school and im not even that strong and only average height
>>222320212Jonah you are 5 foot 6 and keep telling these threads you slimmed down.
>>222318147lol I forgot about this webm
one right hook to his retarded face and all this gay floor shit is pointless
1 Jonah HIll vs 1000 Eliott Page
i wonder if he got any better or this is actually how bad he is
>>222318622You can't blame Steven Seagal, ahikido was already bullshit way before he was born.
>>222318622>>222320659Case in point, every aikido demo looks like thishttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TF_s44RWptM&list=PLTNjZBrcg5fBpQe5MihG-fmd8IQxehtYubullshit martial art
>>222318147Kek they're legally stealing his money and having a laugh.
>>222320453Soo much this! Just ninja kick them when they try to grapple and knock them out haha
>>222320718Kung Pow remake with Jonah Hill when?
>>222320697what if they did this but it was a greco roman master instead of a bunch of japanese pedophiles?
>>222318890It’s not “fake” in the way you’re thinking. Asian martial arts weren’t initially conceived as sports the way boxing or wrestling were. They started out as drills for soldiers to be able to keep fighting if they lost their weapons. MMA, boxing, etc. is all about optimizing fighting styles under a specific set of rules that limit certain actions. Asian martial arts was about drilling basic moves that are moderately effective in the field with the least amount of training, and at the highest levels was all about fighting dirty with no rules, ie eye-gouging, foot stomping, hitting someone in the nuts, disarming, etc.
>>222320582Elliott Page is not a fighter, he's a lover.
>>222320997She*
>>222318351>Burger King or McDonald's?
>>222321761I'll kick you in the face cunt
>Johan Hill trains with the newest BOB modelGuy put up zero resistance lmaoMay as well be doing mall karate you fat fuck
>>222322680Hollywood BJJ in 2026 is mall karate in 1991
>>222318147I'm ashamed to admit that Jonah could probably beat me in a fair fight because I have no idea how to do anything besides spam telegraphed haymakers.
But BJJ is useless against multiple opponents. The three of us would curb stomp him as he lay on his back like a faggot
>>222318147There is literally no martial art that can train you to fight 3 people. Your best chance at that point is to escape. Maybe you’re a killer striker and can heem one of them before the other 2 bring you down, but then on the ground wtf will you do? You gonna lock in a rear naked choke while the other dude is stomping on your head?
>>222318845It’s necessary but not sufficient to become a decent fighter. You have to be able to defend certain submissions and having the ability to quickly snap someone’s arm or leg is extremly advantageous. But yeah if you get knocked out in the first 3 seconds BJJ isn’t gonna help you
>>222322994Judo is so much more functional in an irl fight, but don't let the normgroids know that
>>222320984Asian martial arts were more like a form of performance art. The biggest thing soldiers need in the battlefield is discipline. They need to slavishly obey orders to march forward, charge, dock an arrow, hold ranks, etc.The forms and poses and stuff are basically dance moves and the instructor is the choreographer. The important skill is the ability to jump when he says “jump” and kick when he says “kick” and stand in neat rows in uniform executing commands in unison.
>"HEY FELDSTEIN! AREN'T YOU THE FATFUCK FROM SUPERBAD?">power walk away while he tries to chase you with his tiny legs
>>222321761https://vocaroo.com/1ar56oAbcl05
>>222318147Okay, but how the fuck is he going to counter this?
>>222318147He's wearing a white belt, needless to say anything else.
