In the zombie apocalypse? Ron Swanson would be a good person to live with in this scenario because he is handy around the house and can set up traps and such around the property to keep you safe from zombies and raiders. All you'd have to do in exchange would be fuck him in his worm-filled hairy crusty asshole that hasn't been washed for several weeks. You'd have to get your face right in front of his hairy asshole. Look into his shit smeared anus as it winks at you. Then slam your tongue down that stinky badboy until he ejaculates all over your face.
And then you have Ron Swanson's jizz stuck in your beard, but the water supply has run out, so you just go about your day with Ron Swanson's dried cum in your beard. Cum that smells like tuna and banana leaves.
