Here's the DCU Batman
>>223821667>I was not born on a fucking turnip truck, man. And I was not born at night. I'm the Batman white boy. And I'm gonna snatch every mother fucker joker birthday.
>>223821667>Here's my secret, Gordon - I *am* wearing hocky pants.>To the Fatmobile!
>>223821667Unironically Batman never getting hit even once in the entire movie and actually killing all the bad guys would be kino.
>>223822173Kek
>>223821667AYO ANYBODY SEEN POISON IVYANYBODY KNOW WHO WHACKED BRUCE WAYNES PARENTS
He'd actually be a great pick if they were going for a Dark Knight Returns era Batman, and if he lost some weight of course. 6' 4", massive shoulders, cool voice, unmatched screen presence, he's already a martial artist. Seems like an outlandish pick at first but he checks a lot of boxes.
>>223823615>he's already a martial artist.
The guy from reacher as absolute Batman
>>223823615>if he lost some weight of courseSeagull is obese beyond help
>>223821667More like Blyatman, lol!
>>223823615>He'd actually be a great pick if they were going for a Dark Knight Returns era BatmanNo, because that version of Batman was not morbidly obese, or needed to be carted around.
>>223824908That would work.
>>223826345Lmfao
>>223824847Goose could play Mr Freeze
>>223827810h-he's fast!
>>223826345You might not like it but this body type can beat up 90% of the population. There's a reason every bouncer looks like this
>>223828342No it can't because you can barely move. You'd get a heart attack trying to turn around.I know you like retarded traitor cocksuckers very much but the man is a water tank filled with marshmallow.
>>223821667Impossible, he's too busy filming low budget direct to to DVD movies over at Eastern Europe.
>>223821667Fuck off Ivan. Enjoy American and German boots on the ground.
>>223826345>75% borscht>25% man>I AM BORSCHTMAN
>>223822097Hockey *pads*.
>>223826345What does 'blyat' mean?
>>223828880Whore or cheater.
>>223826345It's not fat it's power
>>223830738No, it's blubbering, morbid obesity.
>>223823615He's a retarded with the acting ability of a dead dog.
>>223821667https://www.imdb.com/title/tt31413658He's got this coming up. Looks interesting.
>>223826345WHA HAPPUN?
>>223828342Weight classes are real and there is a good reason all fighting sports have them, but lets be real here. Seagal is just obese, unhealthy and old. Anyone who has watched his movies can tell you he can't throw a punch or kick anymore without the risk of him having a heart attack.
>>223831768he's a master, you just dont know
