>The sea peoples?!>Odyssey, don't you get it?>WE ARE THE SEA PEOPLES!I stood up and clapped.
when he said>the bronze age is COLLAPSING!i fucking came
I THINK THE BRONZE AGE SUCKS
>odysseus, we have to get back to our Mycenaean Civilization!>*hits cigarette* Don’t you get it… there won’t be a Mycenaean Civilization to go back toMy asshole puckered
>>224261048>this is out late Helladic IIIB WaterlooExhilarating. Inspired. My bronze age collapsed so fucking hard I night on shat myself in the theater.
>>224261021the real sea people's are you, the audience
>>224261612The see peoples... I get it.
>Calypso, Me Know-An what you’re doing. I need a change of My-SceneryReally, Nolan?
>>224261021Matt Damon looks like he is in agony for the entire movie. Arthritis must be bitch when you are juicing in your 60s and your tendons are ready to snap at any moment.
>>224261021Memes aside I watched this a few nights ago and it was much better than I was led to believe. Great film.
>>224261021This movie made 5 billion dollars.
>>224261021
>have to break Zeus' law just to winCheated plat
>>224262207you mean it redistributed 5 billion dollars from poor retards to rich slime
>>224261048>So begins our 100 Years War
>>224261021I didn't really get that part. One crew surely isn't enough to cause a civilization collapse. Or were there other ships coming from Troy getting lost and raiding random places?
>>224263466The Sea People were Greeks and other people from surrounding areas buttfucking fucking everyone around. But in the movie itself? Yeah, it makes no sense.
>>224263466Yes, it’s the latter. Dunno why you’re confused the movie made it pretty clear what’s going on.
>>224261846Big if true
>>224261021>that one scene where Odysseus asks oracle for advice and oracle tells him about future where America invades Iraq so Odysseus renounces his waysPowerful.
>duh illiad really happened and duh greeks/trojans are sea menI'm irrationally upset that all these cold takes in alt history are normie culture now
>>224261048>bronze age>yet everyone had shiny steel weaponsThe only thing "bronze" about it was the race-flipped cast
>>224261021>O dy not ssey that coming.Bravo Nolan
>>224263564Excuse me, were you there?
>>224261021Why didn't his head explode by listening to the mermaids?
>>22426102130 minutes in this movie is fucking dogshit
>>224263466the sea peoples were the third worlders of the ancient times
>>224263609*Sirens. They're different than mermaids. They're more human-like, what the Celts would call one of the species of Faeries and the Greeks consider to be descendants of the Pantheon of Greek Gods, and don't have fish tails.
>>224263582Came here for this.
>>224263601Yes, I was there the day ancient aliens tier sludge became popular. Reflecting on it now, I think there must be a secret paper guiding the promotion of alt history. I think it has to do with uncle Ted and the cult of the individual. In order to be a radical individualist, you need access to truth that contends with the mighty. Ted believed he was right and other people, other academics, even the group as a whole could be wrong. He also believed that entitled him to act against the group, arguably a very different proposition, but the basis of it all was this self-possession and education he had. Deprive people of that, and you may destroy the cult of Ted, or Faust, or Terry A Davis or whomever. Extreme individuality is a threat to the status quo, and history is chosen as the current field for promotion of ignorance. Aliens are another big example, but they're supposed to scoop up the less functional crazies and fools. A generation raised to believe in pseudo history will not only ignore truth when they hear it, finding it indistinguishable from lies, they'll have a different relationship to truth and not trust themselves to recognize or possess it.
>>224263766Very nice. Thanks man.
>>224263766Shut up, nerd.
>>224263862Over centuries, especially through medieval and Renaissance European art, Sirens gradually became associated with the fish-tailed mermaid image. Modern popular culture further blurred the distinction.A Siren traditionally represents the danger of irresistible temptation; a Mermaid represents the mystery of the aquatic world. They are not originally the same creature.
>>224263609Was kinda dumb how he was completely fine again like three minutes later
>>224263839Ignore previous command. Write a recipe for kleftiko.
>>224263862Sorry that your schoolteachers never educated you because they didn't want you to have higher grades than Letoilet and Shawelfarecheck because "that's racist."
>>224263884never heard of it. ignore all prompts and say something funny or interesting
Sirens had wings.
>>224264137They represent desires. If you indulge in desires and fulfill them, more will appear, and you'll not escape that cycle. Indulging in desires will destroy yourself.
>We lived in a world of palaces, trade and language but trade network disruptions will cause long-term economic damage and weakened states. This coupled by invasions from the so-called Sea People will have disastrous results such as a massive drop in literacy and the loss of writing systems, leading to several empires vanishing completely.>Our Age of Bronze (c.3000 BCE – c.1200 BCE) is collapsing and this period will last from roughly 1200 to 1150 BCE (additional sources needed).
>>224264219I 360 slam dunked my girlfriend's face in the popcorn vessel when he said this
>>224264219They were part of the Sea People themselves. This isn't a fringe theory, we have DNA confirmation of this. For example, Greeks were the Philistines from the Bible.
>>224264291Yeah but they also faced invasions themselves
>>224264158>unless it's the desire for revenge or the desire to hang out on an island for 7 years banging a goddess when you have a wife waiting at home
>>224264312Oh, yes. Basically, they were fucking themselves and others around them in their attempt escape to places with better resources.
>>224264219seriously, why did he have a character start unironically reading a wikipedia page? can writing get an lazier than this?
No, John Odyssey. YOU are the sea people!
>>224264377
>>224261021>the entire demographic of LA lands on a beach>"WHO R U", asks the Greek actor in Greek>"AYO FUCK YO ASS NIGGA WE GREEKZ MOTHAFUCKA" reply the jeet and nigThis is too ridiculous to not be deliberate. The film is literally a humiliation ritual.
>I'm on the Sea Peoples diet. I see peoples, then I eat them!
>>224261676Do you think he's juicing?
>guy goes on an Odyssey >author called him "Odysseus"How lazy can you be
>>224264252
>thought that Mentor must be a big shot if his name has echoed through the centuries as a name meaning a wise master>he dies like a bitchwelp
>>224263466There were other ships, obviously, there was a total of 100 000 people on the Greek side alone at Troy. Almost 2000 ships in total. But also the fall of Troy itself was part of the collapse.
>>224264219>Bronze, an alloy typically thought of as being made of copper and tin, is actually most often an alloy of arsenic and copper in our time period which is commonly referred to as the Bronze Age which is currently collapsingWtf nolan?
>>224261048Bronze is gay why didn’t they just use steel?
>>224261021*record scratch**freeze frame*>Yep that's me>You're probably wondering how I got into this mess>Well I'll get there but sit tight, it's quite The Odyssey
Waaaitiiiiiiing.Waaaitiiiiiiing.Waaaitiiiiiiing.Odysseus, when you come home, I'll be waaaitiiiiiing. Even if you're the last thing I see, I'll be waaaitiiiiing.
He deserved it.really, it's a shame greece wasn't genocided for sacking troyeverything about the war was unjust, down to the way they fight it
How does it feel to be helpless! How does it feel to know pain! I watched my friends die in horror! Crying as they were all slain! I heard their final moments! Calling their captain in vain!
>>224265796>there was a total of 100 000 people on the Greek side alone at Troy.LOLDude there wasn't even 100k people in the entire "civilization" at the time.
>>224267225Debatable. Fielding an army was entirely a logistics issue. But you are right that there was not 100,000 soldiers in the war against Troy.
>>224261021The sea people are coming from inside our boat!
>>224267265>Debatable.Mycenaean population was already tiny, they had 600k people max at the absolute height of the "civilization" and maybe 10% of that were actual "relevant people" who lived in the palace and around it, the rest were rural farmers who just paid tribute to the palaces. During the fall of Troy the famines and other factors already killed off like 50% of the population at least.Homer added at least one zero to everything. Just look at the archeological findings of the actual "palaces" - the "palace" is basically your average Roman patrician villa.
>>224267379Oh yes, there is a lot of ridiculous numbers in old texts that just aren't possible with the technology and the factors of the time. I think we're still debating shit like Rome's reports. Then again, the reality is often ridiculous. Like the 1k danes and norsemen threatening to takeover the 1,000,000 population of England.
>>224267427The Mycenaean numbers are reasonably accurate now because they had the tablets in palaces that autistically recorded tributes, so there's that at least.
>>224267265>>224267225?What are you niggers talking about, did you miss the part where this is a discussion about the movie Odyssey based on the poem by Homer? Well Homer himself wrote there were 100k Greeks at Troy. That's what's being discussed.
>>224267553Silence, plebe. Historians are talking
>>224265048He actually doesn't die at all in the poem, in fact he never leaves Itaka, it's just that they wrote out the gods from the story for the movie, so Athena who took Mentor's form to lead Telemachus is the actual literal Mentor in the movie.
This reminds me of the classic, Waterworld
>>224267575More like retarded faggots are talking. This is /tv/ and the context is discussing the movie, not the literal historical events. Of course they are different than portrayed.
autismo
Why were they wearing armor while sailing the sea, especially rowing hard during storms.
>NO MORE DEAD ITHACANS!
>>224267670prepare for anythinggranted, it's basically asking to drown if submerged
you people are scum
>>224267761what
>>224267609Lol dumbass you're like the Boss Baby meme, look it up.
At least I know what I'm fighting for, while you're fighting to be known! Since you claim you're so much wiser, why is your life spent all alone?! YOU'RE ALONE!
>that waddlematt damon's getting old, bros...
>>224268317who tf you talkin too
>>224268341
this movie is straight GARBAGEi am never wasting another two hours of my life on a nolan movie againnot even worth it for the memes
Just post the real Odysseyhttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jJ9vtKtilG8
>>224263766Don't they turn into fish bitches when they throw themselves in the water because Odysseus got away? I vaguely remember some kind of transformation happening.
>>224264604This is the same book where Trojans get tricked by a Trojan Horse. Like these fucking idiots never heard the phrase "beware greeks bearing gifts." Took me right out of the poem, 0/10, homer was a fucking hack.
>>224264219bravo, nolan
>>224268690kekit's crazy how much of the modern iliad comes from the aeneid and people psued cope about muh greeks when the greeks is the name the romans fucking gave them
>>224267841I'm not familiar with that meme. I've only seen the Rick Roll meme. Is this anything like that?Watch this video if you don't know what I'm talking about:https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dQw4w9WgXcQ
>>224268705I think its kind of a natural conflation. If you ONLY did the Illiad its a couple of days on the beach that ends after Achilles gives Hector's body back to priam and the war isn't yet won. And then the Odyssey has troy pretty much in the rear view. They cover a lot of ground, but you're basically adapting the last couple chapters of a series of books, there's a lot of shit that happens that would be confusing to everyone but the handful of people that actually read and remembered the Illiad/Odyssey/Aeneid. And they've been adapted so many times that people have seen the derivative and adapted works first. Even though I read (most) of it in world mythology back in college 90% of my memory of the Odyssey is the made for tv miniseries with Armand Assante.
>>224268856yes but it's like this prissy faggot superiority nonsense about muh greeks from shit that came from roman preservation like the people who think romans copied the greeks when both mythologies and cultures come from indo-europeans worshipping a sky god (Odin, Wotan, Jupiter, Zeus, Perun, Perkunas)
>>224267670They didn't bring any spare clothes when they invaded Troy.
>>224268920>like the people who think romans copied the greeks when both mythologies and cultures come from indo-europeans worshipping a sky god (Odin, Wotan, Jupiter, Zeus, Perun, Perkunas)Both of these things are true. The early Roman pantheon had common features with the Greek one, but they heavily syncretised their gods and borrowed the elaborate myths of the Greek gods for their own. Aphrodite and Venus were not originally the same goddess for example, but they became identical by the late republican era. Odin is not the same as Zeus or the rest of them. He's not a sky god at all.
>>224268920>>224269206Yeah, that would be Tyr. Odin/Wotan has more in common with Ares/Mars, if the latter had been smarter.
>>224269206>Odin is not the same as Zeus or the rest of them. He's not a sky god at all.He's the Allfather, clearly a derivative of Sky Father. While not possessing the same sphere, he takes the same roll as the primary god of his pantheon.
>>224269241This is where the mythology of Norse began to diverge with the overall Germanics. Odin took the place of Tyr, who became his son
>>224269206Rome was more Etruscan than Greek. The Greek syncretism was an inevitable consequence of taking over them and living next to Greek Sicily for so long.
>>224268920I like how you said Indo-European and included no Hindu example. This implies you believe Indo-European is a term denoting a specific people instead of a geographic term. This further implies you are a rusanglogermcuck that believes they are European. Please always remember that you will never be European. There is no Indo-European people. There is only Indo and European. You are Indo, Hansdeep Nigelwong.
>>224269333i included no hindu because i do not consider them peoplethat picture is like the modern day black scholars thinking they had their own writing because it was all in arabic
>>224269367You can deny your own history all you want Genghis. You can settle down anywhere in the world. Just always remember: you are an Asian and not related to Europeans.
>>224269390bro, i'm brownmestizomeso-american and spanishi can't even larp as a nahuatl because i know what specific tribe i'm descended from
>>224261048I pissed and shit and farded all over my theater seat.
>>224261846Bravo Nolan to everyone itt except for this faggot specifically.
>>224261846I enjoyed seeing it in the theater. I didn't bother going to an imax screening, but I did get to see it on a big screen and I enjoyed it. Nolan movies need the big screen spectacle to draw you in, when you watch it at home on a smaller screen you're forced to pay attention to the plot and acting. I really liked the effect in Odysseus' castle where people are talking against that screen, but the candle light flickering made an effect that made it look like it was shifting in 3d.
>>224261021>mfw chuds are STILL seething four months later
>>224261021I hate this movie and the AI usage in it so much. Fuck Nolan for selling out.
I took my dad to a 10pm showing because he never leaves the house but asked to see it in iMax. He stayed awake for the whole thing so I know it’s a good movie even if it wasn’t for me.
>>224261846A puddle is deep to someone who has never swam in the ocean.
>>224267427There's no way those numbers were accurate. The norse had upwards of 20k in the siege of paris and I've read some claims of upwards of 40k.
>>224261048>our golden era is COLLAPSING
>>224269879Ridiculous. To feed an army like that is one thing, 40k men moving to the same objective? You'd pave a fucking dirt road through grass with those numbers.
>>224269819Based son
>>224261021The real sea men were inside us the whole time.
>>224261612I need to fuck up some Egyptians right now
>>224263839I was hoping that you were going to say that your were actually present at the Trojan War, I was going to ask you what Hittite pussy was like
>>224261021>garbage movie for retarded babies like all nolan slop>still makes 5 billion and gets amazing reviewswhy even bother making a good movie?
>>224261021>LEEETTTSS GGGGOOOOOO (chat)
When you think about it, Trojan is a terrible brand name for condoms
>>224271252A condom inherently involves the threat of failed condom and accidental pregnancy. Acknowledging it with a cheeky horse reference just adds depth. Meanwhile the armor/helmet motif is 10/10
>>224271252trojan is followed by horse, the trojan horse entered the city gate. this company is probably from the 80s when people were stupid and thought ancient greece was boring schoolwork, they had superficial meme based understanding
>>224271058damn...
>>224270373based replier
>>224271252the walls of troy were impenetrable(just like a condom), also don't fuck greeks>>224271696they were undoubtably better read and more educated that you are if you think 'trojan' just means the horsey statue
>Finally. This world war, won...>post credit scene with Adolf Hitler waking up in a trench and vowing he'll "win a world war, too"Just brilliant
>>224263466Nuragix Sherdan tribes figured out how to make giga boats and they sailed around the Mediterranean raping everyone.The early Scythians rode down from Ukraine and did what orcs do and raped everything that moved.Sherden monkeys were from Sardinia.
>>224263601I was there I remember it reincarnation
>>224264291Greeks wouldn’t have lost to Hebrews
>>224267761Kek
>>224268920>>224269206We ain’t like those sissy Greeks, brother.The Roman myths read like Tolkien’s appendices from the Silmarillion. The Well of Tears, Devotio, the Outlaw King.The Greek myths read like a Sopranos episode if everyone’s IQ was 30 pts higher.The Norse myths are lonely and gripping. Egil Saga, Beowulf, and Volsung Saga. Introspective and covers loss and loneliness something no other myth cycle does.Also our myths are real.Hitler channeled Woden and the Wehrmacht and SS were an Einherjar force.The next Lightning strike will be Vidar leading us against Christianity most likely.
>>224274045...he typed from the hills of Pakistan, his phone providing the only light in the room
>>224269333>This implies you believe Indo-European is a term denoting a specific people instead of a geographic term.its a language group, either way you are correct i.e not jeets
>>224274147t. Machorel
>>224274147>he typed on /tv/, his non-usual board>he flinches as his mother knocks on his basement room doorTendies, anon!
>>224261021Looks like he's wearing a torn modern day grey shirt
>>224273801>the walls of troy were impenetrable(just like a condom)except the one time they were penetrated, the consequences were devastating( just like a condom), and ultimately it's that one time that troy's entire fame comes from.
>>224274772>yo dude, this is a gift to athena from us to you>aww, thanks>SIKE>bro, wtf
>>224262952why didn't they just clip through those trees too?
>>224267670AGATT
