This is literally all bowser needed to do to defeat mario
>>721914781You must feel very clever. Bravo.
>>721914850t.marioOnly chad luigi can jump over the gigantic 8 block wall
>>721914781>get cape>fly over itggnore
God, can you imagine a world where all media is designed by /v/? It would be fucking awful.>every hero is a perfect god who never makes mistakes and resolves the villain's schemes before they even begin>but every villain would also be a perfect god who never makes mistake and prevents the hero's from foiling their schemes before they even start trying>eventually every work of fiction would devolve into the characters just sitting on their asses, staring at a brick wall and not doing anything that would provoke questions like "why don't they just do X?">and then the entire fucking concept of fiction fucking dies, killed by persnickety nerds who can't suspend their disbelief or silence their screaming autism>and they still won't be satisfied
>>721914781He can just walk around.
>screen can only scroll to the right>build your castle to the left
>>721914781Mario can wall jump in SMB
>>721916014>every hero is a perfect god who never makes mistakes and resolves the villain's schemes before they even begin>but every villain would also be a perfect god who never makes mistake and prevents the hero's from foiling their schemes before they even start tryingMeng Hao walked into the McDonald's...
>>721914781Much easier than this would be for Bowser to simply close and lock the door of his fortress.
>>721916073BOWSER HIRE THIS MAN
>>721914781Tendies are so fucking annoying and unfunny it's unreal.
my famiclone version had some fucky-wucky physics, so I could jump over the pole and just keep running till the time runs out
>>721914781>be oversized lizard>build huge unassailable fortress>still need to shit on oversized toilet with oversized plumbing>normal sized italian plumbers assassinate youYou just can't win.
lmao look at Mario standing there confused he don't know what do do loooooool little midget
>>721914781bowser is a dumbass for leaving invisible blocks therenow mario can cross and kick his ass off the bridgelost levels really chaps my ass
>>721914781>we’re gonna build a wall, and MARIO is gonna pay for it
>>721914781>he doesn't know how to walljump in SMBzoom zoom
>>721914781This is actually in the Japanese Super Mario Bros 2.
>>721916014The word you're looking for is awesome.
>>721914781There used to be a smurfs game on an old Atari or something. You could increase the difficulty gradually, which raised the wall in the first level higher than you could jump. Lmao
>>721914781If Mario had fucked and satisfied Peach like a real men, she wouldn't get ""kidnapped"" by the bad guys every other week
>>721914781YOU FUCKING RETARDS DELETE THIS
>>721917712lmao
This is what I like about Megaman 2. Dr wily does just that but you outplay him eventually.
why doesnt bowser just make a level thats entirely lava with no platforms
>>721916014>stacking 8 blocks on each other makes you a perfect god
>>721916014Sounds like a typical edgelord contrarian dnd session>We don't play traditionally!
>>721918906damn right
>>721919000No, it's a DND session where the players derail the plot by killing the obvious villain before he does anything.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=njS58BL0u5w
>>721918906yes
>>721914781Mario would just find another road to travel
>>721918463>Mega Man 1>Dr. Wily's fortress has no doors or ladders to enter through. Mega Man just rips open the wall with Super Arm.>Mega Man 2>Dr. Wily's fortress has gigantic, impassible gaps between ladders. Mega Man just uses his dad's rad movement items to overcome this.
>>721918801bowser has to demonstrate he can clear the level himself before the Koopa Kingdom Builders build it
>>721914781The levels that you see in the game are an abstraction of Mario finding a route that actually works.
>>721914781
>>721920654But what if he put the big walls...ON EVERY ROAD???
>>721914781Can easily be climbed up with a wall jump
>>721914781You wish, paisano.
>>721916014This is why the MST3K mantra exists
>>721914781he already did and he failed
>>721914781>a tall wall will stop marioyou're a retard and haven't played the game
>>721919272This. But then the DM weasels his way out of it with even more bullshit.
>>721914781>There are people who think pointing out how weird it is that video games do/have video game things is peak comedy or peak writing
>>721914781Assuming it isn't the lost levels with invisible blocks, he could still get up there with SMB1 mechanics. If he does a running jump into the wall and clips into the right frame, he could wall jump up. It might take a few tries, but anyone could do this.
>>721928443>nooooooo you can't have metahumor and point out how silly things are rrrrreeeeeeeeeeyour parents never loved you
>>721917516Bayonetta would win.
>>721919272 And then somehow the barkeep has 200 HP, Legendary Actions, and a tragic backstory about the time the same villain kicked his dog. DM had the rest of the campaign written around that one guy and just said "uhh, he was a decoy, actually."
>>721917516HOLY SHIT IT'S ONE BILLION LIONS GET IN THE CAR
>>721931738Perfect
>>721914781whats preventing mario from going the other way
>>721932589The camera
>>721914781kek wtf? How will he jump over that wall?
>>721923565not sure why this gif makes me laugh but its funny
>>721914781Do you think Bowser can just terraform terrain on a whim?
>>721916637Meng Hao walked into the McDonald's. The cultivator taking his order gave a derisive snort, but Meng Hao did not really care, because he had repressed his aura down to the Single Patty Realm, and a fool would not be able to tell his true level of burger eating."Give me... a Happy Meal!"The cultivator's face flickered before he finally regained his composure and laughed. "You couldn't afford a Happy Meal. Get lost! Don't you see that there are Double Quarter Pounder Realm eaters waiting behind you?"Meng Hao slapped his bag of holding and threw 80 billion spirit McDonald's coupons onto the counter, causing an earthquake which demolished half of the restaurant. Everyone dropped their jaws. None could see how this was possible!"I'll take that Happy Meal with a side order of fries, " Meng Hao said. He was as calm as the ocean in a painting of an insanely calm ocean. "And let me see your manager!"The cashier cultivator coughed up a mouthful of ketchup. He simply could not handle Meng Hao's killing intent, because he was only at the Quarter Pounder with Cheese realm himself. Even though Meng Hao had suppressed his aura, because he had cultivated the Heavenly Burgin' Qi, this was enough to kill people a few levels higher if he truly wanted.It was then that another man which a much more fierce aura stepped forward. "You dare make trouble here?""P... Patriarch Hamburglar!"Patriarch Hamburglar was 99 cents of the way into the Big Mac Realm, plus tax! Meng Hao was pushed back two feet, knocking over a soda machine. Powerade Mountain Berry Blast geysered outward, killing several onlookers.Of course, Mayor McCheese saw all this happen through the window.Meng Hao coughed up a mouthful of blood, snorted, constricted his pupils, and then his expression went calm. He unleashed the aura of 64 patties, condensed down to a 2 patty stack that could fit into his mouth!Mayor McCheese coughed up a mouthful of cheese. His pupils constricted.
>>721932995Who is this, "camera"?
>>721917760You are scum. Nobody likes NTR fags. A miserable excuse for a critter
>>721916637>>721934186"Is this... Seeking the McRib stage??"Meng Hao had the gentle air of a scholar, but it wouldn't stop him from killing several people in a McDonald's."Burger Devouring Scripture! I'm Lovin' It!"With the first keyword of the Burger Devouring Scripture, everyone below the early Quarter Pounder With Cheese stage exploded into purple mist. The light of the immense heavenly burger shone down with the contours of a golden arch as 9 illusory burgers floated around Meng Hao's body, which is probably an important xianxia number that matches the number of lakes in some sacred Chinese province I've never heard of. But that was only a fraction of Meng Hao's power. He waved his arm, bringing forth thirty more cultivation techniques that hadn't appeared in over 400 chapters!"Heavenly Tribulation Fries! Eastern Everburning Egg McMuffin! Fruit Smoothie Guillotine! Soul McCafe Mocha Incarnation!"Meng Hao's expression was the same as ever as he slapped his bag of holding, and brought out his karmic ketchup packet, Fry Cook Lord medallion, seventeen different wooden time spatulas, a five-coloured resurrection coupon, the silk burger wrapper, various souls of lightning McNuggets that he may or may not still have, and his mask of the legacy of Ronald McDonald. Oh, and the image of a flying Chicken Snack Wrap dragon appeared. Remember that? It was basically his Main Thing at the start of the novel, but quietly faded into irrelevance. Until now!All of this takes some time to describe, but actually happened in the space of only a few breaths."What! Impossible!"Meng Hao wanted to summon the parrot as well, but it was too overcome with eroticism by the purple fur depicted on a nearby poster of Grimace, and was busy drilling out a glory hole straight through the poster, and the wall it was pinned to, with its strong parrot erection.
>>721914781looks like you've never played the gamenothing can stop mario
>>721916637>>721934186>>721934271But it was more than enough. The Hamburglar's soul flew out and was absorbed into his mask! He screamed as his body was destroyed completely.Meng Hao brushed off his robe and swept up his spirit coupons and everyone's bags of holding which probably didn't have any cool sh*t inside unless I write him into a corner later, and anyways, don't worry about it for now. He surveyed the rubble that was all that remained of the McDonald's."Guess I'll be taking that Happy Meal... to go!"
>>721914781What exactly are these blocks even supposed to be? Is it dirt? Rocks? What is it?
>>721916014God, can you imagine a world inhabited by retarded redditors that cant take a joke?You don't have to.
>>721917516this image is older than most of /v/
>>721916014>God, can you imagine a world where all media is designed by /v/?>New game comes out>the entire thing is a one frame "save the princess" puzzle>each new level adds rules and obstacles>there are some ludicrous and creative ways to solve them>the princess is extremely cute and has a dickFucking fund it NOW
>>721917760>real men>menEsl
>>721916014He's right ... /v/, it's about time we got our acts together, and ...
>>721935174Start a game design!
>>721934652Oof, so close and then you tripped right before the finish line
>>721914781Dorkly ahh skit>Dude what if Bowser...just used a gun???
>>721914781Not so fast, some speedrunner would find a glitch to get past that barrier
>Why didn't mario fly the eagles to bowser?
>>721937002Why do they have viewers? Who's watching that shit?
>>721916073the left handed castle would foil so many platformer protagonists. why didn't these bosses think of that?
