Happy Easter anon!You still collecting those anime girls on your phone? Hahaha
>>736358624Hey uncle Todd. They let you out of prison after touching that many little girls?
I miss family dinners.
>>736358802At least he isn’t a virgin
>>736359015Neither was my sister after that
>>736358624S-Shut up!I don't even want to be here, I'm just hungry!
>>736358624>unloads ar-15 at them
>>736358624>*pulls out a 24oz Steel Reserve and shotguns it*>nah, I collect anthro women now
>>736358624Even Glasses McDork Face is laughing at me....I'm going back to my room
>>736358624Easter is tomorrow you fucking retards
>another holiday season during which I'll be mocked and ridiculed and forced to spent time with people that hate meholidays were invented by the jews solely to break young men's spirits, prove me wrong
>>736360146I like spending time with my family, even if I don't have a lot to talk about with them
*farts**leaves thread*
what’s the smell is someone cooking eggs
>>736360146if they hated you they wouldnt invite you
>>736358887No family dinner since 2017 and will never happen again.
>>736362050Why
>>736362339They died in the holly
>>736362339Inheritance war.
>>736361258keep your friends close, and your enemies closer
>>736361258>NPCs would never do something out of pure "tradition", especially if they hated itRight...
>>736358624>right now I’m more interested in pokemon
>>736358624>you gotta job yet?can we make this question a societal taboo like asking how much money you make is?
>>736362339They caught me peeping on my little sister while she was showering
>>736359072No wonder why Todd never molested you as a child.
>>736358624>Hahaha! Nah, between my promotion and the baby on the way I don't have much time for hobbies anymore. You guys weren't waiting on us too long, were you? Hey, someone has to scooch and make room for another chair, Diane just had to use the restroom real quick. Mom, this casserole looks fantastic!
>>736362769Naw you ask this instead> why don't you hook me up where you're working?They will completely shut up about that question
>>736363163Let’s all hope “Diana” didn’t cook a dog for us>entire room erupts in laughter
>>736362769I'm sure we're only a year or two from learning that this question is offensively ableist or whitecoded or some such.
>>736358802Jealous?
>>736363163>>736363309https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=igP__33r0sQ
>>736358624why the fuck do they all have small plates with butter on it?
I don't even get invited anymore. It's over isn't it?
>anon can you set some plates?>don’t want to look autistic scanning the room for a head count>don’t want to guess and grab too few plates>know that no matter how I do it, someone will point it out>t-that’s okay, anon, don’t worry about it>spend the rest of dinner in a corner in shame because family thinks I’m a retard
>>736358624Yes.
>>736362798trinity killer...
>>736364106>don’t want to look autistic scanning the room for a head count>don’t want to guess and grab too few platesWhat the fuck anon, do the fucking headcount. How the fuck is that even autistic you fucking autist?
>>736363163>>736358624>walks in>throws two grenades on the floor
>>736364302>everyone do the dinosaur
>>736364302you forgot to pull the pins and now everyone is laughing at you.
>>736364302>Aura so low no one notices until it goes off
>>736363237lol is this neet cope?id chuckle and tell you that youre not qualified
>>736364283because everyone’s waiting on my slow ass to get the plates and I don’t want to take too long, and if I just grab more plates than I need I look like a dumbass when I have to walk back to the kitchen again to return the extra plates
>>736364283even standing straight autistic btwalways hunch, and don't be quiet - if nothing else keep making a low pitched humming sound with your mouthno having both eyes fully open or closed at the same time, that's straight up retarded behavior, similar to walking through a door one foot at a time
>>736364302
>>736364489And you can't survive that?
>>736364489>if I just grab more plates than I need I look like a dumbassIdiot, it's better to have a pile of unused plates since if there's desert, people can just grab another plate instead of using their dirty dish.
>>736364489exactlythey're timing you probablyso when you come back, try asking "what's the time, chief?!" and then laugh a bit, maybe even wink at grandma. It'll be cool
>>736364489Don't listen to the others, they were testing you. If you failed they would have made fun of you for the rest of your life. It's not all in your head, it's exactly as you imagine.
>>736364489the actual key to not coming across as an autist is to stop caring.
I'm bringing my commodore 64 over to play a bunch of games with my 6 year old cousins and plant the seed within them and I'm about to graduate soon so I'll finally be able to get a job and move out and hermetically seal myself away for 20, 30, maybe 40 years :).Anyone else >introvert debt here?
>>736363706for me it's:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v5ztqb00NZI
>>736364531is that guy from Legion ? what movie
>>736364527If you're trying to pretend to be a tard, just wear stretchable waistband shorts and a shirt and pace around one of the rooms a lot while humming loudly to yourself and blast Friday Night Funking music into your ear at max volume.
>>736364782>what movieThe Guest (2014)
>>736362769the youth are working hard to make j*b a slur. I suggest we encourage them
>>736364106You are truly autistic, I just ask how many people we are today and it's suddenly a team effort to count everyone
>In three days he will rise again>Its only two dayswtf
>>736364692Wrong. Normies care deeply and the very autistic do not care at all (see chris chan). But a normie will care about stuff like body smell, dressing nice, having a nice haircut, looking buff, looking wealthy, being charismatic, being assertive or recessive when needed, to make the casserolle taste better than Aunt Carol’s etc etc - stuff the autistic do not care about at all
>>736364868>anime picture>autistic behaviorchecks out
>>736364692it would be easy if everyone didn’t call me out for every minor thing I did while calling me pedantic and autistic for noticing their quirksOr shit on any attempt I make to break the ice>hey, is this In the Mood? I like this song!>yeah whatever, everyone knows it
>>736359072>getting cucked by your uncle
>>736364531WTF Pewdiepie? I thought you loved being a family man?
>>736364902Only because they're unconscious due to the panic attack they just had because someone asked them to contribute to reality in a group setting.
>>736362798How did they know? Were they all in there peeping as well?
>>736364868>ask how many people we are>while everyone is engaged in different conversations with each other>no one hears you so you just stand there awkwardly>people get annoyed because you’re interrupting to get them to help you do something they assigned you to dowhat now?
>>736358624Where's the hot cousin that used to be so nice but now avoids me like the plague?
You must confuse me with that red headed faggot there on the right.
>>736365091>see anon stare at ajar bathroom doorHmmmm. I wonder what this means.
>>736365097Get all the plates out of the cabinet and put them on the counter and grab a plate only for myself and wait patiently at the table :)
>can't play vidya because im chained to the stove cooking like every single holiday family dinner for the last 15 years be nice if my siblings could cook for once
>>736365159So, yes?
>>736362798Why would you peep at her when you have guests over?
>>7363652231000 percent. Throw the whole family into the ocean. Perverts.
>>736364531not even a /k/ fag but that explosion effect ruined my day
not having autism seems uncommon nowadays
>>736364610KekMy cousin always cooks some weird meat, but tells me it's beef. Then after I eat it, she then tells me what it really was... Last year was bison. My wife was not happyI'm going to kill my cousin one day
>>736365309>throw grenade>c4 goes offProblem?
>>736358624At every family get-together my grandma asks me if I'm still a virgin and how by age 16, her and my grandpa had already fucked hundreds of times. She asks me this everytime and will do it infront of my whole family. It never gets any less embarrassing.
I wish I had a big familyBoth my grandmothers died young, one before I was born, the other when I was like 11 years old and she's the only one I was remotely close with. Never really knew either of my grandfather but neither gave a flying fuck about me anyway, neither did dad. It's always just been me, my siblings and my mom, but I think we have had like 2 family dinners in the past year. I think we're all growing tired of each otherthank you for reading my blog
>>736365373it doesn't even look like an explosion, it looks like they shot garbage and exhaust smoke through a cannon (which is exactly what they did)
>>736365369ive done this with beef tounge before and ive only gotten 1 performative gagging reaction from my brothers exEveryone else was fine with it since its pretty easy to hide it compared to other offalsBased cousin
what the fuck do you talk about with people that unironically still watch tv in 2026>hooo that day time talk show>urgh that add again>have you watched the neeeews?am i crazy for not watching tv? its just so much worse than the internet i thought no one would still watch
>>736365375Why in the fuck didn't you just lie?
>>736365375This is so strange to hear as a 33 year old virgin. I literally never get asked if I have a girlfriend or if I plan to get married. I must be really ugly if they don't even bother asking
>>736365375Bro. One of my uncles was giving me a hard time once and my dad looked at him and said STFU. Never happened again. I can't imagine having a parent that didn't stick up for you.
>>736365375>Time's changed you decrepit old cunt shut the fuck up
You lads seriously have troubles with family gatherings? I'm a 30yo virgin and I simply answer "don't know" when asked "when are you getting a gf?" and continue to eat and chime in the conversation here and there - since I do have a stable job and income, have hobbies, can talk about life stuff, etc.Like, seriously, what's the deal? If nothing else, you can comment on the food or drinks you are having. Compliment whoever made the food and thank them.
>>736365375If your not joking tell that boomer cunt to fuck off or youll put her in a nursing home in the ghetto.
>>736365375All my aunts are super excited to play matchmaker by trying to hook me up with nth-degree of separation relatives of theirs that are fresh into college living in their home country. I'm not really interested in making anchor babies and I'm a cunnyfag, so I just politely decline.
>>736365768>why didn’t you just entertain the normie’s humiliation ritual?anon I know this is hard for you to understand, but his grandma doesn’t actually care. Her aim was just to humiliate him and make him feel like shit, and they will have their way no matter what.If you lie they just keep asking more questions and bringing it up until you crack, not even the most harmless lies are safe from vindictive people like that.The only winning move is not to play
>>736365375>if I'm still a virgin and how by age 16Say "yeah, uhm hm"then what? what's she gonna say? literally, what's the worse that could happen?
>>736365917Sometimes you got to stand up for yourself. in my experience whenever i did that i usually ended up in fights.
>>736366015The vast majority of my cousins aren't married so nobody cares anymore. And since several of my aunts and uncles are divorced they are very understanding of nobody getting married either.
>>736366067>trying to hook me up with nth-degree of separation relatives of theirs that are fresh into college living in their home country. Lmao, is that a real thing? Now im starting to believe omar married her brother
>>736366369Getting married to a US citizen is a super quick and easy way to legally immigrate to the US. You still need to pass the citizenship test and all that, but for a green card it's pretty much a guaranteed ticket.
>>736358624Both my parents are immigrants so I thankfully never had to go through these big, awkward family gatherings as an adult, and I only rarely see any extended family if they happen to be visiting at the same time as me.I'm sure my parents are also disappointed and sad over me becoming a recluse, but at least they understand since they've been there the whole time. And they have some autistic tendencies too, so I can just blame it on that.
>>736365794I once read a post that said if people jokingly ask you if you have a girlfriend at work or elsewhere, they don’t mean any harmIf you looked really awful at first glance, no one would ask you that, why would they?
>>736358624this guy looks like he doesn't belong there
>>736364421And would it be remotely true? Or just true in the sense that any listing for it wants to pretend the job is a bigger deal than it really is?
My blue archive folder is almost at 1000 images.
>>736358624Honestly family dinner was more about older family members bitching and arguing with one another during dinner or that one time my neice told me playing undertale was stupid, despite her being a homestuck fanatic
>>736358624i smokes the leg o' lamb
>>736358887no you don't
Tasty!
>>736375565>pink on outside>white on insidewait wat
>>736358624>move abroad>cut all contactsimple as
>>736358802He must've been a Trump donor
>>736358624FLASHBANG OUT
>>736358624CAN'T TALK GUILD'S DOING ICC 25 HC AND I'M GETTING DOCKED 100 DPC IF I'M LATE
>>736375630It's called a smoke ring, nigger.
>>736358624Why is my family white and ugly?
>>736365731people above ~40 seem to have some freakish compulsion that prevents them from sitting at home in silence - they simply must have the television on to create noise. i think it tends to cause brain damage, so naturally it's all they end up talking about
No i pretty much have them all so I'm just working on getting dupes for my favorite girl so her picture will sparkle in my profile card
.
>>736376279Epstein and 99% of people associated with him were registered Democrats.
>>736376279*must of
>FUCKYOU
>>736378309*must they/them
>>736377656It's not. Your family is swarthy and ugly.
>>736362582It's weird how often that happens to families. People are shitheads.
>>736378994*xir/xerdont misgender u fag
My grandparents were just coming over for Easter but now they let my uncle come too. He’s unfortunately going to bring his 3 kids who I hate because they run around and touch all my shit. I only have enough food for 4 people now it’s going to be 8+.
Why are you posting here instead of tearing ass to the grocery store?
>Easter family dinnerIs that actually a thing?
>>736363775First course of a breakfast meal is usually pancakes or toast or something so everyone gets their own butter instead passing around a whole block.Of course everyone is laughing and joking about Bryan's weebery while i explain this to you but i wouldnt have realised because Jennifer barely has her tits covered up by that black top and i was thinking about shoving my butter up her ass
>>736379832Because I don’t care enough to cater to them. it’s not my responsibility, plus I already made the ziti last night
>>736379603Get cooking, scrub. You could also tell them to bring some food in some capacity, since it was unexpected.
PYONG PYONG PYOOONNG, for Crass and Chimp. PYONG PYONG PYOOOOOOONNG! Hoppy Easter! Ivy-ee! Crass and... Chat?! Mmmm, Hoppy Easter!Hhhooooooooooo-ppy Easter! Hoppy Easter! Mmm...we'regonnahavefun! Bye now.
>>736358624Mom? I suspect two of the women here are brown. Did you check their criminal records?
>>736380259I respect the strength of will here, but you can't just deny them food. They're gonna take a slice out of everyone else's and it's going to be a terrible mess
>>736358624www.youtube.com/watch?v=lRMH5XuJfr4
>>736378062>b-but the other partyShalom.
>>736360146The worst part is, if your father hates you, then everyone realizes it and uses it to treat you worse. You try to complain to your family? He joins in.>hahaha he's like a vampire sleeping all day in his coffinyeah that's called depression
>>736358624https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PRGaf-m1V54
>>736359015well he had to pick up the soap for tyrone
>>736366072This. If you become the butt monkey in a family dynamic, nothing short of becoming a chiseled Adonis that makes 6 figures or having a violently meltdown will change that. They'll naturally gravitate toward the status quo and will create new reasons to keep you at the bottom of the totem pole.
>>736358624I have finally come out of my cave.Thankfully I mog everyone in the room, so I laugh along and take my seat, give the guy on the left a handshake and pick up with a question about something from when we last met, and then shake hands with grandad because I don't see him that oftenThen I just listen and chat with everyone there while being handsome
>>736358624>well look who came out of his cave!
>>736379406Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn"
>>736381235We're so lucky that you grace us with your presence, Anon.
>>736381328so, anon, where's your 72 virgins?
>>736364489If you're worried about looking autistic by counting people, you just need to lean into it.>Joke about somebody counting as 2 because they've been working out (compliment in front of everybody)>Joke about somebody getting none because of (family news event where they made a tiny error and we all found it funny)People only think you're autismal if you shut yourself off from participating in the moment.orient yourself around doing and saying nice and fun things that others will remember and appreciate.Go into every interaction like your the host of the party, micro interactions with everybody, always talk about them, share your news briefly but get into what's going on with them, and actually take an interest.Before you do any of this though you need to be good at something that gives you actual, real confidence that you're at least equal to everyone else. Confidence cannot be faked, I don't care what browns on the internet are selling you.
>>736381379Nah, you're just saying that :DDDDBy the way, I know it was a while ago now, but did everything work out with that thing? I remember you were having trouble with it.Nice, yeah, good to hear. Yeah, I should have known you'd handle it, still, scary stuff, huh?So what's new these days, how's your week been?Grandad, you want some of these? (Stuff closer to me than him)
>>736381851This is cope, nothing about this is how it works
>>736358624Tranime is gay.
>>736358802Edgy sitcom brain.this is what badly socialised people think wit is, but the only people who find it funny are the audience (don't exist)Choose instead to be fun and nice to everyone, despite being so handsome and busy all the time, that people expect you to be kind of a jerk.Always seem like somebody who is cool and important enough that you expect them to be a jerk, and be actually a fucking sweetheart.
>>736382454I choose to treat people the way I see fit. People aren't entitled to my kindness or my time, but I make time for people I truly care about. I don't know. Most people can and will waste your time if you let them.Respect yourself before you respect others. Don't socialize with people with whom you have no business with and who don't enjoy your presence (and vice versa).
>>736382169Not sure what it's meant to be cope for.Just get good at something, get into a job role that makes you responsible for other people and you'll learn that dealing with people like this is actually easy and sustainable.You can pretend it doesn't work if that feels preferable to the work involved in getting there
a girl that i haven't spoken to in like a decade DM'd me out of the blue today while i was playing Fetish Locator 3 that she broke up with her boyfriend. what do?
>>736382719She's trying to monkeybranch onto you and use you as a backup plan. If you have self-respect, ignore her.
>>736382719the answer is rape
>>736382454what's the point of being nice to dickheads? people like that need to be publically humiliated
>>736382719Make fun of her for being an aged hag who can't sustain a relationship, then remind her the definition of a whore matches her one for one before going NC
>>736382454playing a guitar is impressive and useful but having 100 billion in a tiny briefcase isn't useful?
>>736382890read the Y axis
>>736382795i don't know what monkeybranch means. should i at least try to smash or nah?
>>736382681Yeah, I think I agree. In younger years I had a little trouble discerning who's worth the time and who's just sucking up attention like a sponge, but thankfully I'm good at time boxing interactions, and I make it a point to leave a function while I'm still enjoying it, so it's rare that I get got nowadays.Generally avoid anyone who seems like a quiet narcissist, and that takes care of 90% of these kind of things. Anybody who is perpetually down on their luck and vocal about it secretly loves being miserable, because the attention or sympathy they receive is the closest they feel to being loved, their brain makes them seek out these opportunities to make their life worse, and then people to soothe them.
>>736382992Just buy a whore anon. Women that bother you out of the blue will cause more problems than some skank that will do the exact same thing and not coax you into a relationship and only cost you $50-200 compared to the literal thousands this bitch will by trying to make her ex jealous.
>>736382843Why do they need to be humiliated though? Surely being themselves is humiliation enough?Changing your demeanor to school somebody else is to be controlled by them.I'm just nice to everybody in my life. Some of them you might think don't "deserve" it, but my treatment of others, I don't think it's something that can be deserved or not, I'm doing it because it's in line with my character to do it. I like waking up every day and being this guy.They have to wake up every day and be that guy, and maybe that works for them, maybe it's misery. Not really a problem for me to solve
>>736383095Don't all women go on a complete fuck-free for all session right after a relationship ends though?
>>736383039OW sounds like an actual psychopathHJ sounds like someone who wants to get laid and would do anything to get him there
>>736383316Don't you think theyve thought of that?She's dangling meat on a fishing line in front of you, and you're so retarded with lust that you think you're in control as you take the bait.You think that if you play it smart you get what you want. In 100% of scenarios she's getting what she wants from you, and you think you're in control.
>>736382228I miss the old days, before anime became tranime.
>>736365375Next family dinner when your grandma's there, bring a prostitute with you to dinner (a la Borat) and then in the middle of dinner just throw her on the table, rip off her underwear and start breeding her in front of everybody. Pay the girl well
>>736383316Maybe. I don't associate with the average excuse for a harlot called modern women that much. I'm just saying that she's more trouble than she's worth and you can find drama-free pussy for less. You know the dude is going to either try to woo her back or he'll see you and her together and if you have any sense, you'll not get involved in that nonsense.Your average woman is not worth it (let alone anything). They create more problems than they actually solve.
>>736383196it's not like i seek out conversations like that. there's only very few people i really don't like and i usually just stay away from them, but i award them with zero respect or courtesy. i might be lucky that my family likes each other after reading this thread. open hostility at a family gathering sounds awful.
>>736362769I just started asking my uncle's of they're still alcoholics in response
>>736383039This is retarded. Shyness comes from shit like this where even attempting to try can cause you to suffer massive consequences because everyone decided to agree that your specific action was just so different (the difference being they decide they don't like you, and others want to join in)
>>736365375Just look her in the eye unwavering and say "why would you say something like that? what the fuck is wrong with you?"You open yourself up to this shit by being a spaghetti spiller, stop it.
>>736383643Fair enough anon, I won't try and change your mind, but I do think that giving certain people a status that makes you break with your usual convention is a shame, it sort of hands them some control.If they insist on talking to you, you will have to be disrespectful and then either exit the interaction or be prepared to escalate it. In that way they have some small control over you, even if they don't know it and so aren't likely to exercise it.
>>736383791Yes, I actually agree with what you're saying, and would only go further to tie to to my point, when you get that kind of treatment from your parents at a young age, massive consequences for innocuous actions or speech, based on them just not liking you, that's what creates quiet type narcissists.I have sympathy for them, it's a very hard thing to escape, so most never do, and I just can't associate with them because they don't know how to swim, only how to accidentally drown those who'd try to rescue them.
ffs another stealth uma thread
>>736383791It's crazy how little it takes to become the guy in the top panel these days, at least if your genetic starting point is around average.
>>736384126That's not what a narc is though. Getting upset you get bullied isn't being a narc, it's just being emotionally upset. It's also not something that ends with their families. Society encourages it. #MeToo was a thing anon, long before the hashtag.If you've encountered an actual narcissist you'd realize they are borderline psychopaths.
>>736383954>it sort of hands them some controlmight be. what you're proposing though, is make them feel better with empty words? laughing off a personal attack? i don't think i can, i would rather keep my distance
>>736358624make them brown and it'd relate to this board more
>>736384996Go back to /d/.
>>736358624never had this. my parents were literal retards and lived off of disability gibs. i somehow got a bachelor's in engineering. yes, i love anime women and play anime openings/endings in my work truck for my coworkers to hear. dont let normalfags control you.
>>736364302i remember that webm where people are having a meeting and a guy walks in and says something. nobody listens and he pops both grenades
>>736365375We really do live in the worst timeline. I got lucky with one gf for a year when i was 25. Now im 30 and haven't touched anyone since.
