ELDEN RING
ONION RINGS
I am peeved by the wasted potential. Still a good game, but it could have been even better.
>>738148758Don't blueball us, please explain how.
COCK RING
BALDEN RING
>>738148812You will just have to cope with having blue balls.for fuck's sake, what else could I be talking about by wasted potential? Melina! We wuz robbed of an actual character!
>>738148594Is Marika trans or what?
>>738148594
>>738151592I just figured she was a hermaphrodite.
Why is she mad at us for burning the tree? The world was already dead.
>>738152493Who? Melina? She's the one who wanted you to burn the erdtree
>>738151592>literally transforms from a woman to a man in a cutscene You tell me.
>>738151592It's never clarified. Could be one body that transforms, could be one body that splits into two then recombines since that fits the alchemy stuff.
>>738151592>>738153403 (me)Also could be that they shared a pot from the Hornsent and split later.
>>738152907she gets mad if you use frenzy to burn it
>>738153072but trannies can't do that
>>738156587Ever shagged a tranny? It's magic
>>738151592>elden ring thread>7 posts until trans discourseNew record.
/v/ has still never once provided a single example of Ranni doing anything wrong.
ELDEN RANG
>>738158984kek
>>738154979Because you have to become the literal Lord of Frenzy, aka THE guy whose goal it is to reduce the world to ash
>>738148868Melody Marks is cute and all but she fucks like a dead fish, her body is nothing special, and that costume is extremely low effort even by cosplay porn standards.
>>738158108Her wedding present had the bad greatsword moveset.
>>738159660DMGS beams with a strong attack poke would be too powerful. Hell, it's already too powerful as is.
>>738158984SOME GIT GOOD AND OTHERS FEEL THE PAIN
>>738159723At least give it the mirrah/hollowslayer moveset like the two knight greatswords So I don't slam the embodiment of our matrimonial vow into the dirt constantly, lol
>>738159376it's weird that giving yourself the poke with miquella's needle just sidesteps this entire thinglike you can frenzy the tree then cleanse yourself and get a normal ending or something
>>738159997[i roll away from the enemy to avoid getting stunlocked]
>>738160245Well, you gotta do it in a place beyond time and physics.
Sir Gideon OfnirTHE KNOWING OF SOME VERY SPECIFIC INFORMATION AND NOT MUCH ELSE
>>738148594What even is an Elden Ring
Why didn't Boggart become Elden Lord? He literally has the Iron Balls and infinite shrimp, wtf is he doing just sitting at a lake and jobbing to poopyman?
>>738160546THE ALL KNOWING
>From games of the same universe:>Elden Ring and Dark Souls 2>Dark Souls and Dark Souls 3>Sekiro, Bloodborne, and Armored Core 6
>>738148594SHIT GAME!
>>738151592Marika is the Rebis.
>>738160594He has shrimpler wants in life
>>738160594unironically he had too weak ambition and got steamrolled by someone with stronger ambition.
WEDDING RING
>>738151624I'll never forgive Miyazaki for giving Melina almost nothing in the DLC>Why is she a ghost? Why does she have torrent? Who gave her the goal to find the next Elden Lord, and why?>Who cares lol, anyway she's Messmer's sister
>>738161461all of that is answered in the base game and the detail we did get informs her nature.
>>738161461>Why is she a ghost?She literally tells you in the base game her body was burned away.>Who gave her the goal to find the next Elden LordShe literally tells you in the base game that her purpose was given to her by her mother.
>>738148750Kek.>>738148594She should've been more involved. Also when does Tarnished edition come out?
>>738148868what do you mean xxx parody?
>>738148750Daughter of 'merica...
>>738160546console commands
>>738148594OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOH
THE ABHORRENT SHIT ANNIHILATOR
>>738160245It was something he had made tirelessly to remove the influence of the Scarlet god on Mallenia, but its hold was too strong. So I guess it only works for you because you could reach Farum Azula>>738160332 where time happens to be frozen so the Frenzy god isn't looking.
>>738160594The challenge seemed too LOATHSOME, so he psychologically debuffed himself
