Don't know if anyone else can relate to this but I have never experienced anything that affected me spiritually in any significant way.Im no atheist, I was raised a go-to-church-every-sunday christian and I recently became catholic. I have never stopped believing in God or the spiritual world during any of this.In fact, I go further than many of my fellows because I also believe that certain lesser spirits like fairies, elves, and even many of the old pagan gods probably exist.None of this is based on any transcendent experience, it is all purely reasoned and accepted on an solely intellectual level. I have long watched fellows of mine brought to tears simply through prayer or the recounting of an "experience" all while I watched wondering what was missing from me.I can't deny that this has made me somewhat jealous and resentful. It's as if I have a weak soul, or something is "jamming the signal" so to speak.The only time I can say that I ever truly feel something transcendent is in appreciation of aesthetic or musical beauty. When I see a beautiful sunset, or painting, or hear a lovely piece of music I feel a tug in my soul that I can only describe as a great longing.I think this is primarily why I was drawn to catholicism, material beauty seems to be the only thing I can understand beyond pure intellectual assent.Can anyone else relate to this? Did anyone else recover from being a spiritual npc? Also: don't know if this is related but I've also always been resistant to drugs and placebos. Even when I believed they would work. If I am undergoing a medical procedure that requires the use of painkillers or numbing agents I will often require two doses.
I guess it's just me then.
>>41095629How much time do you spend online & do you watch porn or do drugs?
I heard if you start meditating you will experience mystical experiences and wild synchronicities
>>41095629Bump requesting more info on improving vibrancy of the minds eye.
>>41095629I wasn't "spiritual" until a deity visited me. Imagine if I believed some psyop bullshit instead of nothing before that, probably would have picked someone else.
>>41096202I stopped porn and masturbation over a month ago.
>>41096352Also i've never done drugs of any kind. Except for very occasional alcohol at dinner time.
>>41096202I admittedly do spend a large amount of time online. Usually listening to music or lectures and I read lots of articles. I have no social media but I use this website probably too much.
>>41095629Scientifically, you have low levels of serotonin in your brain. Medications like fluoxetine could help you for 2 to 4 months.The alternative is weed; it contains THC, which scientifically inhibits serotonin reuptake inhibitors in a matter of minutes, not months. Spiritually, this phenomenon is explained as the decalcification of the pineal gland.In a short time, you will have an active spiritual life; you will notice patterns that could hardly be the result of coincidence.
>>41096459>Scientifically, you have low levels of serotonin in your brain.I don't want to call you out or invalidate your claims but having an imbalance of any chemical will cause spiritual insensitivity imo. I have had wildly spiritual experiences with substances such as MK-677 (a chemical which increases your natural production of growth hormone which allows for deeper REM sleep) and 9-ME-BC (forces your brain to do a dopamine reset). Anything which damages your dopamine will fuck you up spiritually based on my personal experience. Quitting porn and most dopamine ruining habits (including most drugs) will surely help. The other thing is that the ability to sense spiritual shit is highly genetic. The populations with the current highest average IQs have developed some of the most advanced and in depth spiritual and metaphysical practices in the world. Some people are not genetically gifted with the ability to understand and use metaphysics (essentially what spiritual sensitivity it, granted that is a very very very watered down way of stating that).
>>41095629This is normal. Most people haven't had anything supernatural happen to them. You can induce a supernatural experience tho through things like DMT or meditation, yoga etc. The question is do you want/need that tho
>>41095629Not just you OP, my experience is identical to yours
>>41096595>The question is do you want/need that thoThe real problem is, you can research a subject all your life. But can you understand it fully if you never experience it for yourself?I want to truly understand what people talk about on this board. With my mortal soul intact of course.
You gotta do it like the rest of us. Lots of trauma, obsession over finding out why existenceexists in the first place, and a collapsing of your identity. You get to a point where you just can't ignore the spiritual side anymore.
>>41095629What are you most afraid of? The most surefire way to tap into your spiritual side is to confront your absolute worst fear. The fear that popped in your head and you quickly hid from consciousness. You need to figure out what that fear is, and face it fully. I guarantee you will have a spiritual experience then.
>>41097058>What are you most afraid of?I have a group of fears which are related to each other>facing the deaths of my family members while i'm the last one left alone in my old age>failing to achieve what I desire most and looking back with regret>fear that all my memories and experiences and moments will be lost to time and nobody will remember them/us.>fear of eternity, heaven or hell.
>>41097157Ok now put yourself through that. However you do it I don't care, but for me, weed gives me lots of anxiety that I use to help trigger mini psychosis events like this. Get in that fear, truly know that it is reality and it is already here and happening to you. Feel it and don't fight it. Let the futility of your desperation and pointlessness of your life and struggles overcome you. Surrender to it. Try not to argue with yourself or go down mental rabbit holes. Just sit back and watch.
>>41095629If you're a NPC, you're an NPC. And that's okayMy condolences, dude. There's a lot of hypothetical talk about how one can open up their senses past the veil. But, honestly, if you don't have a base, you don't have much hope for growth.
Bump
>>41095629Sup. You just have to adjust your sensitivity, think Peter Parker with his first spidersense orgasm.Nothing wrong with you apart from dirty bloodline, not your fault. This means that your default sensible mode is off.Many ways to do this, best is breathing.If you breath correctly and with awareness every breath should feel like a tiny orgasm.Practice that and you'll be able to SEE, you'll see.Have a good day fellow anon!
