Hello everyone.I’ve always been very skeptical. Throughout my childhood and into adolescence I never took biblical stories like Noah or Genesis literally. I believed in God in an abstract way but preferred rational, scientific explanations — and eventually became atheist, rejecting the supernatural. Still, some experiences trouble me: I’ve had several bizarre events that I can’t fully explain, and the doubt lingers.Once, as a child, I was alone on the top bunk listening to the rap “Fairy Tail” by 7 Minutoz when I heard a very loud voice call my name. It sounded like a feminine whisper yet was loud enough to scare me; I ran out of the room. After that I developed a sense of being “commanded”: if I don’t follow certain impulses, bad things seem to happen, as if a voice inside me knows what will occur. It happens almost all the time; the intensity varies — sometimes strong, sometimes faint — and it used to be stronger.Days after the first voice I began hearing voices in my room. They faded over time but occasional whispers remain. I also experience frequent sleep paralysis, often with voices or strange sensations: once I felt I left my body and was carried like a bird or angel; another time a voice said it would “take me” and I felt pulled upward.I don’t know whether this is a mental disorder (like schizophrenia), vivid imagination, or something else. These episodes cause fear, especially at night. I’d like possible explanations and your opinions.P.S. While writing this, the “command” feeling returned.
>>41098936I think you might like being commanded.
>>41098936just a schizobable
from 1st Samuel, chapter 3:2 And it came to pass at that time, when Eli was laid down in his place, and his eyes began to wax dim, that he could not see;3 And ere the lamp of God went out in the temple of the Lord, where the ark of God was, and Samuel was laid down to sleep;4 That the Lord called Samuel: and he answered, Here am I.5 And he ran unto Eli, and said, Here am I; for thou calledst me. And he said, I called not; lie down again. And he went and lay down.6 And the Lord called yet again, Samuel. And Samuel arose and went to Eli, and said, Here am I; for thou didst call me. And he answered, I called not, my son; lie down again.7 Now Samuel did not yet know the Lord, neither was the word of the Lord yet revealed unto him.8 And the Lord called Samuel again the third time. And he arose and went to Eli, and said, Here am I; for thou didst call me. And Eli perceived that the Lord had called the child.9 Therefore Eli said unto Samuel, Go, lie down: and it shall be, if he call thee, that thou shalt say, Speak, Lord; for thy servant heareth. So Samuel went and lay down in his place.10 And the Lord came, and stood, and called as at other times, Samuel, Samuel. Then Samuel answered, Speak; for thy servant heareth.11 And the Lord said to Samuel, Behold, I will do a thing in Israel, at which both the ears of every one that heareth it shall tingle.12 In that day I will perform against Eli all things which I have spoken concerning his house: when I begin, I will also make an end.
