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Everything just feels empty, hollow and false, i don't really see a reason to keep on caring and going for anything. I've also grown tired of living out of pure Spite for those who hate me.

Death won't bring an escape to this and it will only bring you back here through Reincarnation or Quantum Immortality, while any attempts at changing the status quo around you will only get you shut down by larger and more powerful interests.

Many esoteric traditions promise methods that can influence reality itself but all i've seen so far is just elaborate theatrics and psychology.

Some New Age ideas are interesting in how they explain the mechanics of Vibrations and Mental Manifestation but there really isn't any provable and tangible "Harry Potter tier stuff", the closest i can imagine to this is the Mental Placebo Effect and Edward Leedskalnin's Coral Castle where he supposedly manipulated the heavy stones using Vibrations like magic.

Creating a family also doesn't seem to fulfilling in the modern climate as you're only creating new people who will inherit the suffering. So in this case what is there left to do?

I do apologize for this moody "blogpost" but i've been desperately looking for /x/ answers for a very long time, traditional faith has also failed me with it's Astrotheological Allegories and Moral Metaphors, everything just feels extremely hopeless.
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>>41303572
Kill your ego. Become part of everything.
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>>41303572
OP may I please pray for you, in the name of Jesus Christ?
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>>41303572
>why should i care?
because when you die you wake up right back here almost exactly as you were - but your world is alittle smaller and more you focused, for good or bad. caring is how you find synchronicities, ie you pay attention to shit. you hate everything because youve ignored the worlds calling to you and instead done what people want of you. synchronicity is the author of the heros journey, but its not prewritten, you have to give you attention to what calls you.
>>
Well than pack up and fuck off home...
Hollow man...
Not sorry your struggling...
So go struggle sum moar....
And be quiet peeps trying to focus...
For them the day done...
And nights are bright...
>>
>>41303572
what is your vision of the "good ending" future for humanity?

for me it is humanity as a space exploring species, living in harmony with the planets resources and awareness of the psychological biases everyone has because of evolution, and not wanting to feed your own ego, not wanting to gain an unfair advantage and keeping it.

etc...

i asked because this could be a goal for you.
finding this future utopia vision, then doing things that are within your capabilities to get to that point.
it can be as simple as supporting your family, supporting your nephew, helping your closest friends (without suicidal empathy)
there are always reasons to live, you just do not see it right now, it is not permanent, nothing is. and you know that, you are blinded by your current mood, which can change easily.
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>>41303618
Can you elaborate more on that please? I already know that technically "all is one" (unity) but how exactly do you become "part of everything"?

>>41303622
Go for it if you want, however i don't really believe that Jesus was an actual historial figure, your prayers might just be feeding an Egregore Anon so you might want to be careful to...

>>41303632
I already keep track of the Synchronicities daily actually, i was writting them down for a while but stopped because there are just to many of them to write, most times i don't even know what they mean.
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>>41303572
/x/ is not your place to cry for attention, fuck off back to /soc/
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>>41303640
Fair enough, but where is "Home"?

>>41303648
Ancient traditions speak of a Cosmic Ocean rather than a vaccum, and stuff like the Oort Cloud/Van Allen Radiation Belts might be a "firmament" that permanently bars us here so i don't exactly see space travel as a viable "good ending", not to mention all the possible hostile life forms out there like the ones who built the weird structures on Mars.

If i had to envision a Utopia for humanity i would envision one of Unity, but not in a melting pot type of way like the current "elite" are doing, if you treat and mix everyone as one species rather then a set of unique sub species then humanity just becomes a formless "blob" without any real identity, i believe what makes humanity beautiful is the uniqueness of each of it's cultures and peoples, each standing out in their own color like the flowers of a beautifully organized flower garden.

People have tried to exterminate other groups of people throughout history due to these differences however history has shown us that this is statistically impossible, no matter how much of one group you try to kill there will always be some remnants or descendants of that group hiding in some isolated mountain colony or remote living space.

As for what i could do to get to this point there really isn't anything that i relistically see, the world is entangled in a very complex and deeply rooted web of power and toxic interests that has been spun/woven over thousands of years by many larger groups, focusing on my family is nice but i don't really feel connected to them as their interests vary greatly from mine and i'm viewed strangely by them because of it, i also have no nephews or close friends.

I could vent for hours but i don't want to make this thread that much of a blogpost about me, i thank the anons who took their time to reply to me when literally nobody else will, i feel way closer to the people here than any others i've met irl.
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>>41303731
Seeking attention wasn't exactly my goal here, i've been pondering these questions for about 8 years of lurking here and only decided to post these now to see if i could get some /x/ related answers, all Anons are free to not reply to me and let this thread die, i just felt like /x/ was the only apropriate place to ask because of the spiritual nature of some of these questions, /adv/ would probably just tell me the basic self improvement stuff we've all heard already.

I've also never been to /soc/ but just by checking it out now i can already tell i won't get any proper answers there...

>>41303736
>slight grammar correction
>rather than
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>>41303654
>Can you elaborate more on that please? I already know that technically "all is one" (unity) but how exactly do you become "part of everything"?
It’s difficult to teach through text alone. You must recognize that the person you pretend to be is just a temporary mask placed atop a small chunk of the universe. Any emotion you feel, every thought you have, is illusory and fleeting. So the goal shouldn’t be to feel good or to enjoy things or to build wealth. The goal is to carry out the will of the universe through observation, patience, self-sacrifice, and love.

Some people find this through drugs or interacting with animals or listening to their favourite song or reading about Jesus Christ. It doesn’t matter. You are not a man. You’re an agent of the universe, or the godhead, or whatever you want to call it, observing itself.

Imbue everything with as much meaning as possible. Thank your food for existing. Thank your pain for existing. Thank your sky for existing. Thank your knowledge for existing. Humble yourself to the greater good, and trust your eyes when it presents itself.

Practice. Be kind to your animal body. Free your mind of sin/obsession. Fill your heart love/reverence. Think fourth dimensionally, allowing time to reveal perfection. Let every pattern be revealed, and bask in the warmth of your ability to observe.

If all of this sounds too hippy dippy, then I’d recommend these practical steps:
>Follow guided meditations on YouTube
>Sit in a beautiful place and watch the world happen
>Honor the positive traits that your genetics and environment have provided by becoming better, learning as much as you can, and maximizing positive output
>If you’re religious, reimagine scripture as a secular truth being taught to you through the abstraction of language. If you’re an atheist, try visualizing abstract concepts like “good” as part of a tree.

Best of luck to you. You will never be perfect and you don’t have to try to be. Practice
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>>41303654
>Go for it if you want, however i don't really believe that Jesus was an actual historial figure, your prayers might just be feeding an Egregore Anon so you might want to be careful to...

OP I believe I have found your problem; the same unclean spirits that want you to feel low, anxious, depressed and hopeless, are the same ones that want you to believe this, that you have typed. The Holy Spirit is the one that will lead you to all hope, joy and peace, in Jesus Christ.

I absolutely will pray for you, thank you for at least being bold and courageous to give it a try, I will pray for more boldness for you, that one day you will proudly and confidently proclaim the very truth: Jesus is Lord!

>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8BA72T7_HBs
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>>41303654
>believe that Jesus was an actual historial figure, your prayers might just be feeding an Egregore Anon so you might want to be careful to...

You damn fool! this entire site and internet is serve to feed EGregori!

>PRAYERS TO JESUS CHRIS CAN'T FEED EGREGORE BECAUSE EGREGORE MEAN COLLECTIVE MIND. JESUS CHRIST IS JUST ONE PERSON. AND PRAYERS I GOOD AND CAN'T DAMAGE ANYONE./

YOU SATAN SPIRIT ALWAYS HAVE FALSE CARE FOR OTHERS!

>I CAN'T WAIT TO CATCH YOU AND THROW YOU INTO DEEPEST PART OF HELL! YOU DRAG NOT ONLY HUMAS BUT SPIRITS ALSO! YOU WILL BE FOREVER ERASED FROM EXISTENCE!

>EVERYONE WHO READ THIS: PRAY TO JESUS CHRIST AND TEST HIM! BECAUSE IF YOU PUT YOUR TRUST IN HIM, HE WILL RESPOND YOU AND YOU WILL FEEL THAT YOU BECOME LESS WEIGHT IN SPIRIT ! YOU WILL FIND PEACE!

>GOD IS GOOD GOD AND IN HIM EVIL IS NOT EXIST! THSE WHO LOVE HIM TRULLY HE WILL AWARD 1000X MORE !

WHAT IS IMPORTANT:"WITH HIM YOU NOT NEED TO USE ANY SPECIFIC FORM, THAT CONVENCIONAL CHURCHES TEACH THEIR FOLLOWERS, NOOO! wITH HIM IS NEED TO BE HONEST AND TO SPEAK WITH HIM , AS YOU WOULD WITH ANYONE OTHER. HE LISTEN, AND WAIT YOU TO START CONVERSATION. HE WILL NOT ANSWER INSTANT AS ANYONE OTHER WOULD, BUT VERY SOON HE WILL ANSWER AND YOU WILL GET WHAT YOU ASK! PEOPLE MADE RITUALS FROM PRAYER , AND FELLOWSHIP WITH HIM! AND HE NOT LOVE RITUALS.. HE LOVE OPEN AND HONEST HEARTH. AND TO PAY MORE ATTENTION "WHAT HE THINK" ABOUT YOUR WORK,THOUGHTS,PLANS,ACTIONS. TO YOU START TO CARE ABOUT HIS "LAW" AND FEELINGS, AS HE CARE FOR OUR FEELINGS!
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>>41303797
>You must recognize that the person you pretend to be is just a temporary mask placed atop a small chunk of the universe.
A Ghost in the Shell, a Spark of Energy (of the creator?) inside a Flesh Automaton, the word Person also comes from the Roman word Persona which is quite literally means Mask, our bodies just being masks of a Higher Being or Godhead so to speak.

I've heard of that hypothesis, and when you say carrying out the will of the universe through observation what are you meant to observe really? Your general surroundings? People around you? All of the above?

Drugs just lead to psychosis and i've already went through the trauma of loosing many animals because of a horrible neighbor i had.

>Imbue everything with as much meaning as possible.
That's solid advice, but what meaning is there to be found in a technically empty hologram?

And how do you think fourth dimensionally exactly?

>You will never be perfect and you don’t have to try to be.
When you analyze the human body you will see that we all have the mathematical golden ratio embedded onto many of our body parts, this golden ratio has been used as a standard of symmetry/perfection on many of the great buildings of antiquity, you could technically argue that we were already created perfectly with nature's design no?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Eahn_ttWG28

I also wish you the best of luck on your journey, this conversation has been fruitful.
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>>41303654
>I already keep track of the Synchronicities daily actually, i was writting them down for a while but stopped because there are just to many of them to write, most times i don't even know what they mean.
a coincidence is justly so a coinciding of incidents, a syncronicity is the world using context only you will comprehend to show you something .... at the start. the goal is not to understand them, treat it like a small boy bringing a something to his mother simply because its neat and he wants to share - in this you are the mother, the token is meaningless, its just neat, just give it it some attention - and as you do synchronicities begin to synchronize and before you know it the wee lad grows to the philosopher king of the earth whom still just wants to show you everything cause its neat thats things work.
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>>41303572
JOKER dude !

"TRUST YOUR BROTHER,, i ASK FOR ONE CHANCE" I'M NOT ASKING, UNIFICATION, NOR THAT YOU DROP YOUR EGO, NOR THAT YOU CHANGE ANYTHING SIGNIFICANTLY, NOR THAT YOU DO NOTHING SPECIAL.

"HERE COME, TURN TO "JESUS CHRIST" AND TELL HIM WITH YOUR WORDS THAT NO ONE KNOWS OR HEARES, HIDE SOMEWHERE, AND TELL HIM "LORD GOD ALMIGHTY, I WANT TO BELIEVE IN YOU AND BE YOUR SERVANT, PLEASE HELP ME!" YOUR ENEMY, SATAN, TOOK ME AWAY FROM YOU, AND THAT'S EVERY IDEA THAT I HAVE IT IS OPPOSED TO YOUR WILL AND YOUR LAW. IT IS DIFFICULT FOR ME: HELP ME RELEASE MY BURDEN, AND I WILL BLESS YOU FOREVER IN RIGHTEOUSNESS, I WILL SEE MORE WHAT IS YOUR WILL AND LESS WHAT IS MY WILL.

ANON "HE WILL ANSWER" MAYBE NOT INSTAND, BUT IN VERY SHORT TIME IT WILL "

JUST DO IT, THROW AWAY YOUR VANITY, AND PRIDE!
THAT IS SO SIMPLE: "JUST START CONVERSATION" AND DO NOT SEARCH TO BLAME HIM, BUT INSTEAD UNDERSTAND WHERE YOUR MISTAKES ARE, AND HOW YOU WRONG. BECAUSE HE'S NOT DOING ANYONE ANYTHING WRONG! EVERYBODY WHICH SUFFER THEY SUFFER BECAUSE OT THEIR MISTAKES AND WROND DECISIONS!
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>>41303882
again DEVIL DOCTRINES!

You are not created to think 4 dimensional, when you are 3 dimensional, 4dimensional thinking is every imagination!

IF YOU START TO THINK 4DIMENSIONAL AND HAVE PLANS HOW TO GET THERE, AND LESS ABOUT GOD! THAN YOU WANT TO GET IN 4DIMENSIONAL , WITHOUT GOD, BY YOURSELF AND YOUR POWERS, RATHER THAN SERVE GOD! NO ONE EVER WILL EVER GET ANYWHERE FROM EARTH WITHOUT "JESUS CHRIST" YOU JUST CAN;T ASCEND... YOU CAN ONLY DROP AND DESCEND INTO HELL!

>HIS WORDS ARE: "I AM THE WAY,TRUTH AND LIFE" NO ONE CAN GET TO FATHER EXCEPT THRU ME!

DEVIL/SATAN HE WANT TO GET TO FATHER, NOR ALLOW TO OTHERS, BUT HE PLANT FALSE SATAN DOCTRINES OF CALCULATIONS, FORBIDDEN KNOWLEDGE, SCIENCE, SELF IMPROVEMENT METHODS, EVERYTHING JSUT DON'T CALL "JESUS CHRIST" THAT IS SATAN DOCTRINE//.. YOU CAN EVERYTHING JUST NOT CALL HIM!
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>>41303948
>HE WANT TO GET TO FATHER

"HE DON'T WANT GET TO FATHER"

>sorry mistake!
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>>41303801
>The Holy Spirit is the one that will lead you to all hope, joy and peace, in Jesus Christ.
The Holy Spirit is usually represented by a Dove, the Dove was known by the Greeks as Peristera or the Bird of Ishtar, in other words Venus.

Jesus is the Son (Sun) of God and his dying & resurrecting myth corresponds to the "Death" of the Sun in Winter and "Resurrection" during Spring.

God The Father is typically shown as an Old Man (like in the famous Michaelangelo painting) and his name is Jehova or Yahweh which is Saturn, Exodus 20:8 also says to keep the Sabbath holy, the word Sabbath comes from Shabtai which means Saturn.

The Bible is a very elaborate Astrological allegory, this is because the ancients were agrarian civilizations that depended on the seasons to thrive and they measured the seasons through the movement of celestial bodies (zodiac), to the ancients the planets were moving gods in the sky that bestowed upon them the seasons and food/grains they ate (they didn't know what orbits were so they called planets wanderers).

>>41303881
An Egregore is not the collective mind but rather an entity that arises from the collective mind via focused intent and emotion (according to René Guénon), when Christians collectively pray to Icons they are feeding the "images" of the icons which in theory creates Egregores.

Satan is also Saturn which will then make you question how both God The Father and Satan are both Saturn, and then you realize that there is only one ineffable creator and that these dichotomies are illusions.

I don't have anything against Christians but i believe many are misguided, the modern Church has also taken a very materialist tone with the Walls of the Vatican being heavily covered in Gold...
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>>41303572
Daoism, Buddhism, Zen.
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>>41303889
>the token is meaningless, its just neat
I would disagree, if you connect the Synchronicities together in a chain you will eventually find that everything is interconnected and that there is an underlying theme to the "chain of events", Quantum Physics also supports this idea to an extent with it's ideas of Quantum Entanglement.

Numerical Synchronicities might also be a result of Chronons.

>>41303919
>I WANT TO BELIEVE IN YOU AND BE YOUR SERVANT
Why should we become subservient to some abstract externalization of God? Don't we have free will?

>>41303948
>You are not created to think 4 dimensional, when you are 3 dimensional, 4dimensional thinking is every imagination!
We humans are capable of imagination for a reason no? Plato spoke of the Theory of Forms and Cave Allegory where our world is just a shadow/projection of a higher dimension.
>picrel

>YOU CAN ONLY DROP AND DESCEND INTO HELL!
It seems we are already in Hell Anon, the suffering here is not "normal."
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>>41304024
>Daoism
Living in the "Now" without much thought.

>Buddhism
>picrel
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>>41303572
Fuck everything. Only power and the pursuit of power matters. Everything is cope.
>>
Meditate
Find enlightenment
At least have an apotheosis.
Maybe do drugs if that's your thing.
Get spiritual.
Seek for a meaning.
Something might happen in the future.
Anything really. If you want nothing and that's okay too. Row row row your boat.
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>>41304051
There is only now.
https://youtu.be/IuDY8m72tgk
>>
You will not change your SATAN/DEVIL doctrine and will stay in hell forever! >>41304032
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>>41304376
The Bible Admits that Satan/Saturn is the God of This World. 2 Corinthians 4:4
We are already in Hell.
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>>41304455
Saturn is the Demiurge. The Demiurge is Yahweh. The guy you're responding to is a hylic and will be stuck here for a very long time.
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>>41304524
I know, but the term Hylic seems to be derogatory and counter productive, as Gnostics we should make an effort to spread some knowledge.

Gnosticism in and of itself was also a psyop created by Simon Magus to create a slave mentality, Gnostics think they are trapped in this world against their will and unable to change it, other esoteric traditions believe this is wrong and that we can influence the world through ceremonial magick.
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>>41304455
The Bible tells us to turn from the transient/temporal to the eternal. Everything which moves/changes is temporal. If you zoom into anything far enough it's just blinking in and out. If you use emotion or thought, that's movement. If you try to seek something, understand something, recall, imagine, affirm or negate anything - that's movement. Before any movement there is that which doesn't change. Prior to waking, dream, sleep, knower, knowing and known. You know that which doesn't change directly by simply being what it is (prior to being, non-being, mental conceptualization or creation). Paradoxically being untouched by the emanation, it holds no divisibility between it and what's emanated.
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>>41304768
Anything that has any meaningful influence on anything is by definition temporal. It's really interesting that the all-powerful all-loving god can only help you after you die and can't tell anyone about it.
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>>41304659
Yeah, I get it. Spreading knowledge is never a bad thing, especially in a place like this when you never know who might come across it, or who it might inspire to start digging for themselves.
I don't mean hylic as an insult. What I mean is some people can't be saved or aren't ready for the journey, at least not in this incarnation. There's wisdom in that, knowing when to pick your battles. Unlike him though I don't belive you'll be thrown into a pit of hell if you can't figure it out this go around, you'll get another chance. And like you said, we're already in hell.
I don't think somone who worships the demiurge out of fear, who belives Jesus IS the demiurge incarnate, belives that is the most important part of Christ's message and the only path to salvation, and demands you do it too, is anywhere near the truth though. He'll probably just call me a devil worshiper or something, or in the past burn me as a heretic. He will claim others are worshipping the devil or a false god, while literly bowing on his knees out of fear to the demiurge.
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>>41304777
It can be known while alive sotospeak but it's like the Sufi concept of fanaa or ego death. That's not to say that no I remains, you'll still be there in a way, the veil of divisibility just goes out the window.
>>
Look into stoicism. You have no control over the world. But you do have control over how you feel.

If you feel like this, its because the internet has brainwashed you into it. Reject the brainwashing.

You will align yourself with narratives. You must realign yourself away from narratives that make you sick toward ones that make you healthy.

The new age stuff takes vibration and manifestation too literally. Constructive wave interference is the goal. Imagine for example you had supportive friends, and a supportive family, those are two waves that constructively interfere.

But those are external to you. You need to make waves internal to you. Align your natural strengths with your goals, align your dopamine system with your goals, align your body with your goals, align your inner thoughts with your goals.

For example - you hinted that you think negatively about the future and suffering. That is misaligned with your goal of being content. The future is what you make it. Go outside in the sun and feel the wind. Feel how beautiful the world is. Align your feelings of appreciation for this beautiful world with your hope for the future.

Disallow rumination. Disallow doomscrolling. Disallow everything that contributes to your feelings of dread. These are a poison.
>>
make your own paradise
reality doesn't owe you one
>>
>>41303572
I haven't found a reason.
All I see are excuses and unconvincing babble.
>>
>>41303778
This is a baww thread.
/x/ is not your blog.
I repeat, fuck off to /soc/ or /b/

The information you get here is either gonna be schitzoposting from some naracissistic basement dweller, some faggot Christian who does not belong here

Janny do your job, you are letting these people shit on the corpse of /x/
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>>41307736
This.

Fuck off OP no one cares about your little faggot feelings. You have no clue what's waiting for you in the "afterlife" you're only saying that as a cope to not kill yourself. You're afraid like everyone else.
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>>41307788
based dubs
>>
>>41307736
>>41307788
See
>>41303778
You are free to sage the thread and let it die, i am not forcing anyone to reply, however i am highly thankful to the Anons who replied, their answers have been highly constructive :D

Thank you /x/.
>>
>>41307736
>>41307788
It's also interesting how people like you are never this agressive toward other shill threads here, this thread might actually be helpful to other Anons, /soc/ and /b/ are just porn and degeneracy, this is a spiritual problem that many in modern society face. If you don't like it then you can just go back to your containment threads.
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>>41303572
Our only option is in locating the exit point of this simulated “reality.” There is some sort of truth to be known but it’s obscured in this nebula of bullshit. Sometimes I have moments where I think I’m really close to finding it and then just like that, it’s gone. Don’t despair or give up. I know for certain that we can leave but who the hell knows what awaits us on the outside. Perhaps it’s the fear of that which keeps us here?
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>>41304916
Sufism seems interesting, is Rumi a good place to start?

>>41304857
Christians are rigidly dogmatic and mostly interpret the Bible at face value, the Exoteric meaning rather than the Esoteric.

This literal interpretation teaches subservience and dependency on "higher powers" like the Government or Church (Hebrews 13:17; Matthew 22:21) for guidance rather than salvation on your own, they await some hero messiah rather than becoming their own messiah.

It's also ironic how they preach "thou shall not kill" (Exodus 20:13) then proceed to kill hundreds of thousands in crusades, inquisitions and maritime explorations during the 15th and 16th centuries.

They are also taught to be God Fearing (Proverbs 19:23), to live in Fear of their God (The Demiurge/Saturn).

>>41304960
Solid advice Anon, thank you.

>>41305188
Thought about that, but if that's the case then why are we forced to owe it everything everywhere, everyone is forced to toil for everything?

>>41307730
The Great Work Takes a Lifetime.
>>
>>41308513
I've also thought about that, escape? But where to?

I've spoken to some psychonauts in the past and they say that reality outisde of this material existence is to "abstract" for us and that we are better off here. I can only imagine what kinds of horrors they saw.



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