I am the most fucking lonely person you could ever meet in your life. I have never had a partner in real life. I fall in love with impossible men. Well, only twice, actually. It is extremely difficult for me to fall in love. Every time it happens, it is extremely rare and specific. I have never been able to masturbate. I really FEEL NOTHING, no matter how much I rub myself, damn it. And well, I have a lot of mental disorders and I am too unstable etc etc.
The person I fell in love with has a stellium in the 12th house. I also feel more sorry for his astrological chart than mine. I feel very sorry for him. I hate to see him suffer.
>>41982829Girl's just in here feantically rubbing her pussy with star charts thown all over.Nice.You seem cool. Try to hide that a little bit and I'm sure lots of guys would be thrilled.
>>41982918I'm not interested in meeting anyone new. I'm honest, I only talk to one person. And the man I'm in love with still hasn't accepted my request on discord because we had problems, but I'll keep waiting. He has avoidant attachment issues and gets very overwhelmed with me...
>>41982930Hey now let's be nice to everyone.
>>41982942There was a time (less than a year ago) when I wasn't even able to share music. I considered it too intimate.
>>41982829These pics always remind me of flight computers
>>41982963Por una cabeza, metejón de un día de aquella coqueta y risueña mujer, que al jurar sonriendo el amor que está mintiendo, quema en una hoguera todo mi querer. Por una cabeza, todas las locuras. Su boca que besa, borra la tristeza, calma la amargura. Por una cabeza, si ella me olvida qué importa perderme mil veces la vida, para qué vivir. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8NciKGzbb-4
>>41982829>Mercury-Pluto / Venus-Neptune"Oh, you can’t help that," said the Cat: "we’re all mad here. I’m mad. You’re mad."
>>41982829I'm the same, just slightly older than you based on your pluto.12th housers, especially with Saturn and/or Jupiter retrograde, seem to be cursed to have everything arrive later. It's a karmic wait. They are usually unlocked by their Jupiter and Saturn returns, which were impeding some crucial aspect of themselves up to that point.The catch is that everything you do in the meantime will influence how much big the "payoff" turns out. There are things you can be doing right now to improve your self and soul. They're not what you want to be doing, but you should do them in order to arrive at the payoff prepared to reap the most you can. The world usually points out our own shortcomings to us with humour, so be receptive to synchronicity and coincidences. You have a disproportional desire for fun and other outgoing activities, which makes it more painful to be a hermit. Just be aware of that and know that it's ok not to get it. Good luck anon, you're gonna make it.
>>41983501It's nice to find someone as doomed as me. Really nice. My life is torture, and I mean that seriously. When I was a teenager, I came very close to mutilating myself. I had a visceral rejection of certain parts of my body, and being awake was pure agony, but I got over it.
I want to marry a giant woman and have snu-snu
>>41984609Not a single house 12. I hate you, you damn lucky bastard
>>41982829Jupiter, your spouse:>If you have a Jupiter in Gemini, it could indicate that love takes a few twists and turns before you find the right person. Jupiter is detriment in Gemini, placing it in a weakened position. This Jupiter placement indicates that you are attracted to a variety of personality types, and you might have to date around a little before you find the person who strikes your fancy. You also tend to attract overly complicated relationships that can cause you a headache. This Jupiter placement indicates the importance of communication in building a long-lasting romance. Having Jupiter in the third house shows you might fall in love with someone you grew up with, like a classmate from school, a neighbor, or a family friend>Having Jupiter in the fourth house suggests you will likely meet your partner close to home. There is also a possibility that you will meet them at a dinner party or out walking your dog or housewarming hosted by friends. Mars, your ideal man:>A woman with Libra Mars wants a man who is well- mannered, balanced, and calm. A man who is a diplomat and has good social skills will win the heart.>Venus rules Libra. You’re a lover not a fighter at heart, yet you’ve more respect for people with strong opinions. Wallflowers need not apply. To get the best out of you, they need to give as good as they get, but also know when to draw the line in social situations – and be able to hold their own. You love a socially adept person.Lillith 12H aqu>you're all over the place, you don't want to be contained by 'tradition' which can make you unfaithful, tendency to alienate yourself just to feel different>venus reinforces this is how you love + how you appear to menSaturn in taurus, 3H>Return will beat into you: self worth comes from within, especially regarding socially, thought processes, interests... forcing you to find stability and constancy
>>41985536>Having Jupiter in the third house shows you might fall in love with someone you grew up with, like a classmate from school, a neighbor, or a family friendImpossible, men from my country never attracted me, and in fact I don't talk to men from my country. I've always fallen in love with foreign men of a different race to mine who were unavailable and made me suffer a lot. Keep in mind that my venus is in aquarius...
>>41985536can you please read?Can someone versed into astrology tell me what makes me an incel hated by women who has never had a single friend online or not?Can I get some advice?
>>41985607Listen, I just copypastad from my sources. You've already established you have chronic snowflake syndrome so of course you try to buck the system. None of this is 100% guaranteed, the planets simply indicate your inclination. I'm sorry if you feel the need to reject these notions. I also told you your saturn return will force you to become more sensible. Your chiron placement also indicates your core 'wound' is your intrinsic purposelessness and feeling lost, especially publicly and in career; go out there and help others find meaning in their lives, bring them some fun.Also>discordIt's not real love, grow up and stop getting groomed. Ffs, I'd rather you use AI boyfriends to help you get off until you're mature enough to be open irl to someone real. Go make your favorite husbando on yodayo or something, fill the definition with your fetishes, and rizz him up and get the bs out of your system. Use AI like the tool it is instead of 'falling in love' with random guys online. Better yet, go on some serious dates irl with a human, I'm sure there are people who could use your chaos to liven up their existence.
I'll try my hand at it, I'd appreciate if you could go re-draw the chart with 'Whole House' selected just so it's easier for me to read.
>>41985702>>41985661
>>41985702>>41985706thanks
>>41985607where are you from actually?
>>41985661Stop crying, you motherfucker. I'm the one who's really screwed. Plus, I'm poor and latina, and I live off neetbux because my father is abusive. I hate him and don't deal with him. >>41985673Wow, you're being very defensive. Relax a little. It's true love, and I don't care if I have to convince you. This same person I fell in love with goes to other continents to see his friends, so I don't see a problem with him seeing me. But anyway, I won't see anyone from my country because the men in my country are really meh, and besides, I'm not really attracted to men unless we resonate emotionally, share the same pain etc etc. I fall in love with the invisible, not the physical...
>>41985831Latam
>>41982829Is this a stellum in the 12th?
I love you.
>>41985721>leo rising, first impression persona>scorpio moon, how you see yourself and intimate persona>capricorn sun, overall personalityI'm seeing that despite being naturally attractive and gregarious like leo, you're trapping yourself in your scorpio inner pov. Capricorn tends to be super grounded too so it's probably aiding scorpio moodiness by making you more reticent and being a general wet blanket. Figure out how to wield that mars scorpio, chicks dig that ruthless passion and determination.Venus square pluto is a shame, I can relate (opposition here) and it brings a very strange Thanatos + Eros vibe, intensifying that 8th house Venus which is the house of sex, intensity, and passion. Venus as your ideal woman... 8th house, so as I said, asks for some intensity and passion. Potential significant dowry. Pisces indicates someone feminine and gentle, not aggressive. Specifically you're looking for an ability to be vulnerable in her. That trine bond between Mars and Venus brings a whole extra layer of harmony and devotion.Jupiter indicates meetingher through dating apps or friends/family, latter more likely as it's reinforced by 8H venus.7th house aqu, she's going to stand out from the crowd and be pretty original, might be a different culture.Lilith in aqu, you alienate yourself a lot actually, important since it's in the house of relationships.Your chiron is also sag but 5th house... so that's likely where your self-expression obstacles comes from. Work on that constant doubt, it's okay to tap into your creative side, people like being around you when you're being yourself. You could use a little of OP's freedom lol.Saturn return should see you unloading some social drama, maybe you realize you have nothing to lose and come out of your shell going down swinging to get what you want out of people. You should wind up even more driven and dedicated to your life goals.
>>41985836I'm not being defensive, I've just seen a million free spirit special snowflakes like you and the short, honest truth is to move on and do what makes you either happy or fulfilled. You made an attention seeking thread, complained you were lonely and masturbation doesn't satisfy you, I gave you the answers as I can understand them in your chart. Idgaf if you're only attracted to foreigners at this point in your life; all I can say is if you're choosing to repeat the same mistakes again and again, stop playing the woe is me card.Also chiron in 10th house actually does indicate daddy issues, but it'll integrate to make you a better leader.
>>4198583112th December 2000 11:35 (GMT-3)27°2'S, 65°18'W - Bella Vista, Argentina
>>41986251Thank you though I also study astrology so I have tit for tat room here.Good job on the scorpio moon, I'm a heavily bitter person, horribly bitter and petty and a loner. Alone, entirely alone. Resentful of what I have and what I dont have. I barely leave home for the past almost 10 years I rarely go out I havent met people I feel rejected by people.So I dont get the leo asc thing, I dont feel like I have a personality others want to be around because I dont have one for others, I barely talk when I am with people I am in no way someone that is for others, irl or online. Few words. I mostly think and think and go back to thinking. Leo asc with maybe 6th sun then? The 6th house and the sun arent shining there.Dating apps? I dont think I have good looks for apps, I am very unique looking Id say, again, I am horribly insecure. I hate women too, like violently hate women as a defensive reflex.I've been told that also the 9th house placement might mean a partner from another culture or country or whatever coupled wiht your 7th house aquarius thing. I just dont know. I feel like barely a human.
>>41986264I just think that those people have the ability to change. I abandoned my deeply held beliefs for the person I love. I left behind a very specific and strong hatred, and I could continue to change, but that person does nothing to change. Funny.>>41986395Thanks, now I'm going to kill myself.
>>41986412>I mostly think and think and go back to thinkingThat's the mercury square moon AND mars crippling you. Unending internal debate that hinders outward interaction, often leading to misunderstandings that make people combative- and that mars especially can make you too quick to act, when you're not overthinking. The conflicts and 'failures to connect' all serve to iron out such shortcomings and make you better at communicating.You also have a ton of fixed signs which can contribute to that self focus.>I hate women too, like violently hate womenT-that sounds like a problem. Fr tap into that leo asc, loner lions don't start prides and tend to get picked off. Do you really want friends or a gf? Not being rude, just want you to consider if it's something you genuinely want- recognizing that can help motivate you to keep trying.Unironically, find some free-spirited aquarius sprts or some fellow scorpios who study deeper topics. I can't tell you where or how to make friends, just that you need to choose to make the effort yourself. Definitely bee yourself but try to be congenial with everyone you meet.Your chart definitely inclines you towards successfully reaching your goals, especially career + work, but that's why I ask you to question what your goals are. Despite the initial misgivings with relationships, I don't see why you shouldn't have a fulfilling social life. If you don't, the saturn return might force you anyway in a few years. You're not for everyone, that's fine, but that should just make it all the more rewarding when you start to find the right people. Go sign up for some neat shit like foraging classes, making herbal remedies, take a local ghost tour, hell even massage courses so you can yoni the fuck out of the girl you eventually want to possess. You'll find odd sorts who are more into the mystery side of life when you go looking for them, your chart shows you're meant for off-beat people like yourself.
>>41986991OP here. The person I fell in love with is an aries, he has venus and mercury in taurus in the 12th house, and pluto in sagittarius in the 7th house retrograde. Even so, I know that love isn't easy, and that's precisely why I can't let go. The brutal contrast between us is painful, while I am extremely honest and show maximum vulnerability, he cannot. He has a hard time verbalizing anything, and when he sees my “intensity” in communicating my feelings, he distances himself. He can go days, even weeks, in absolute silence. And that, honestly, is very sad. Unlike him, I can't keep my feelings to myself. I have to express them, or I end up in uncontrollable despair, regurgitating my feelings for him and crying with every confession. What do you think?
>>41986991Thank you for the follow up. I stay in my room all the time, for a while now. I have violent urges against women, rape, violence, cannibalism. That I have to be honest about. I'm a very angry person when I feel frustrated.I'm not sure there's a me for others to like.I want sex, I have never felt in love with anyone, I've never had a romantic crush on a girl or man if you are to imply that. I just...feel bored all the time.I don't think I'll have a social life honestly.I've been told saymy pluto and 12th house north node, could it be that i am meant to stay alone?
Look, I am coming off of SSRIs and I feel like a psychotic psychopath.I'm getting back on them ASAP.I need them to keep me from being angry all the time.Maybe after I get back on them I will be easier to be around.Right now I just want to tear someone's throat out and fuck the wound.I will do better when I get on some Prozac or something.
>>41982829Astrology is a pseudoscience lacking explanatory power for how the world works.
>>41987180How does it feel to be horny? My libido is completely dead, and on top of that, I'm hypersensitive to touch, and often the rubbing of clothing is so unbearable on my chest, genitals etc.
>>4198715612H planets tend to be complicated, simply put. It's the end of the cycle, rhe big lessons from those planets are done and coming home to roost in this life.Look beyond astrology crap and focus on what it takes to be HIS devoted partner then. You can't change yourself, but you should be willing to cater to his needs to some extent to help him in a lifelong partnership too. Do what you can manage just to help his comfort. Likewise, let him know you need him to be more forthcoming in his affections towards you so you know where you stand and don't feel the need to accidentally suffocate him.As with anything, find healthy ways to express the things that are consuming you within.Taurus Venus is very traditionally sensual and a homebody. Venus in 12th is a great lover, but tends towards affairs.>>41987166There's nothing that indicates a loner life in your chart, your pluto just indicates deep internal conflicts and needing to find creative, fulfilling ways to express yourself. Your chart shows good promise of attaining goals, especially in your areas of expertise, whatever they are.You genuinely need to sit and be quiet with yourself and try to find root causes for the urges you have. It's alright to open yourself up to uncomfortable feelings, whatever they are. No one's going to arrest you for examining in-depth why you feel violent urges.Never felt any form of affection? Not for a parent or even a waifu? Have you at least felt moments of gratitude or happiness towards someone, no matter how stupid the cause? Just fixate and magnify on that feeling, try to expand it and carry it more often, see how you can appreciate that person's existence because they were able to do that one thing for you once. Recognize that relationships bring loads of small moments like that to you and others. We're all in service to each other in this life; it's not demeaning, it's rewarding to know you were able to brighten someone's day or help them with something.
>>41987216Bro you badly just need to get out of the house. Best way to fix any oversensitivity is prolonged exposure. Go join a community garden or garden center or something that will make you use your hands/body and get you out where you have to touch icky things. When you're tired from hauling things all day and aren't able to sit around bored, you'd be amazed at how all that shit fades to the background. It's just an imbalance. Put your ass to work until you're grateful to have 5 minutes to sit and watch the birds.Idk how at-risk you are, so please just try to avoid being in isolated situations with 1-2 people if you think it might trigger you to do something regretful. Clean up public, busy parks, don't go on isolated hiking trails etc. Be tenacious even if you get irritated. If you're given a task, they're counting on you to finish it and no matter how petty the job is it helps them. You'll never integrate and grow if you just stay home all the time. Eventually you'll get to a breaking point; if it were me, I'd rather be out there trying and frustrated instead of having a breakdown at how I did nothing to reverse my life 2 years from now.
>>41987365Damn it, we're not talking right now. He doesn't know how to handle vulnerability or commitment. He's used to hiding his feelings from his female friends, and every time one of them confesses her feelings or might do so, he completely withdraws, just like he did with me.Personally, I don't want to live my love life in secret. I'm not going to let the 12th house dictate that pattern for the rest of my life.I think I've lost hope... or at least I'm starting to lose it. But every relationship teaches you something, so it wasn't all bad. Thanks to him, I was able to see how deeply I am capable of loving, and that became a catalyst for a fundamental change in me, even despite all the pain.>>41987422I don't think there's a solution, it's just my sensory issues due to my autism, but I agree with you, the truth is that I find it very difficult to do concrete things, I live a lot in my head.
>>41987365I really dont know if I have felt any real affection to others like that, there are moments where maybe. I might nit be that emotional to others but I am heavily emotional about myself. I honestly dont know a whole lot about me. I feel muted or inhuman. I dont feel like I fit in or will fit in with anyone. After almost 10 years of being a hiki, can you blame me? I dont know what a real relationship or friendship is, I want the tangible things like sex not the abstractsLearning to be me?
>>41982829There's a reason you're lonely in life. It's not purposeless, nothing is, even bad shit. Same for him, there's a reason for it. There's something he's supposed to gain or do learn from being lonely like that. It's happening to teach you guys something about yourselves.
>>41982829>>41985661Lol these 2 charts actually have great synastry together
>>41988029Well, actually, it's not that bad. It would be nice to share this loneliness with someone else. I just need my favorite person and no one else.>>41988099God, he is tamed by social expectations. It is preferable to have a man who does not hide his virginity than one who lies and says he is a great conqueror of women.
>>41988797I am not tamed by social expectations. I just want to find out what love is, all my anger at women is fake and defensive.
>>41989524Sometimes I also hate women, but it's a fluctuating hatred. It's because of my fucking bpd.My disgust is always taken to the extreme.Do I see something I don't like about a woman? I hate being a woman, and I don't like being a woman precisely because of that.Does a gay man momentarily cause me to feel repulsion? I deeply hate gay men, and I want to differentiate myself from them as much as possible.All or nothing.Absolute polarity.>I am not tamed by social expectationsthen don't say you're a loser because you don't have sex
>>41989684I have BPD-ish behavior too if not actual BPD. Well. maybe not. I know what you mean, self hatred. I hate being an incel or feeling like one, I don't even care that much but it's a fear of missing out. I don't to live an incomplete life while others win.
>>41989720Well, I have a formal diagnosis, but what the hell is winning or losing? Life isn't a game. Take it easy.
p
>>41982829OP here. This is a thread I made a while ago: https://archive.4plebs.org/x/thread/41770276/#q41770276Falling in love is so painful... Many things I read about him hurt me when I read them, my heart twisted with pain momentarily, and when I fantasize about him, every time I do, I feel butterflies in my stomach involuntarily. I've never felt this way about anyone else. It's too intense and visceral... without him in my life, I feel completely empty, alive but dead, like a zombie.
