Please listen to me. If a vampire ever contacts you offering to make you immortal... just take the deal. Ten years ago, back when I was much younger, I had that exact opportunity. I said no because I was super religious and committed to God. Now I feel old and weak. And I'm gonna be honest I wish I said yes.
He actually looked very similar to this man. Never saw him again.
>>42052759looking like a gentleman kinda
Vampires aren't real. If you look up Lord Byron and his circle, you can literally follow the paper trail of the modern vampire myth from there. It's shame how uneducated you people are.
>>42052747>If a vampire ever contacts you offering to make you immortal...for no reason, just because the elite vampire society wants to get some losers to join...Sure, Anon.
Motherfucker I am holding out for a werewolf to turn me. I'll die sooner but I'll have fucking fun in the meantime.
>>42052899"Ok, you can have vampire blood, and become a vampire, or werewolf blood, and become a werewolf..."*takes both and becomes an alien*
HOLY FUCK DONT POST IN THREADS LIKE THIS ITS DANGEROUS VAMPIRES WILL CONTACT YOU
Vampires are not real and drinking blood is bad for you, it spreads illnesses and causes high iron levels. Pls do not drink each others blood anons. There is ppl who larp as vampires and drink blood but it does not give them immortality or any special powers. Very unhealthy activity.Plus, immortality on this planet would not be beneficial anyway. I cannot fathom why anyone would desire to live more than the standard human lifespan.
>>42052980https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hA_hUiKHPbM
>>42052980hewwo anon-kun, do you have any bloooooood for mee
>>42053026>There is ppl who larp as vampires and drink blood but it does not give them immortality or any special powers. Very unhealthy activity.Just that this isn't true.https://i.4cdn.org/wsg/1772559439978456.webm
>>42053068And yet all these rich "elite" people drinking the blood of children allegedly age like shit, look old as fuck, need organ transplants and literally age faster/worse than some random japanese grandma eating beans and fish.. so clearly it's not true lmfao
>>42053090Maybe they're 200 or 300 years old.
>>42052747Just lift dork
SEX WITH CINDY
This thread is most likely to groom someone here on this website .
>>42053269Yes. You. I want you.
>>42052980reporting in
>say yes to the parasites!total vampire death
>>42054142>wait, are you black?...
>>42052793Vampires are real but the modern depictions are almost completely unrecognizable as such.
>>42052747>wanting to extend your staying on this gay earthshiggy diggy
Bros, isn't there a way to be an ethical vampire!?
>>42054516I heared vampires can live without drinking blood, but then they're aging like normal people and have no special powers.
>>42054223Then what are they like, my vague friend?
>>42054641>I heared vampires can live without drinking bloodWhy do you think they pay people to donate blood? There's an entire underground vampire economy, where blood banks serve vampire food banks just so normal non-vampiric folk don't need to know about their vampire activities.They made an xfiles about it. Friggen trailer parks.
>>42054655They are not social creatures. They are manifestly dead things, though they do not rot, not beautiful creatures at all. They're also not very intelligent, seemingly motivated largely by hunger and existing in what I can only describe as a permanent state of senility. They do not realize that the people they meet today are not the people they knew in life, however many years ago that was, responding to strangers as if they were old friends or family and then attacking in confusion when they don't react as expected. They do not exclusively consume blood, but eat almost continuously and indiscriminately while active, preferring ordinary food but if they cannot get it consuming blood or even trash or excrement.
The cuban vampire
Lots of vamp threads lately after a relative dry spell. Also someone in one of the last threads actually knew what picrel was and has tried it
Bloody sex with Cindy and her sisters.
>>42052747no shit retard only christcuks and people with lives worth living wouldnt accept
>>42052793>Vampires aren't real. IThis, OP would end being drugged on some Epstein's Island, or used as organ donor by some shady organization.
>>42052747>Please listen to me.
>>42054516Of course! Simply construct your own ethical framework where you stop caring about the plight of mere humans.>>42054641Wrong x3>>42056768It's because I'm the best /vamp/ poster and I've returned.>>42053253>>42056784Damn she has sisters?
>>42056768I do and have as well. The local government gives it for free to pregnant women here. It's rather expensive to get otherwise. It doesn't actually taste at all like blood, just slightly meaty cheap chocolate in my opinion.
You and me... we could be free.
These vampire threads, what a load of shit. I'm telling you right now and you better listen; vampires don't exist. They never did, and they never will. There's a whole bunch of faggot asses making these shit threads constantly. Couldn't even get laid, make shit threads, all about some make up pretend stories because no women want to have sex with them. I've had it with you fanooks, people in Jersey wouldn't ever talk about things like this. We're religious, catholic, family people, we look over our own and have communities. Not like you, a bunch of deviants, demonically possessed by evil thoughts, sick shit! All of you need to quit your perverse satanic tendencies and go to fucking church, save yourselves while you still can, Jesus Christ will light the way away from these threads, and you better fucking seek forgiveness as soon as you can.
>>42052747I would be fine with mortality as long as nice vampy mommy nom noms on me. Type 0 negative, no STIs, please taste me, will adjust my diet to make the taste more spicy or fruity if you want.
>>42058660How tall r u
>>42059062184 cm, literally a king of manlets, but I have very prominent veins on neck and forearms.
>>42052747I mean It's something I've always been interested In. I think surviving cancer as a kid and watching the family drop like flies through the years to other ones has a lot to do with it. While I still have some very close friends and a little bit of family that's all I have and deep down I know I wouldn't mind outliving them. Honestly I likely wouldn't even hesitate If a female vampire was to offer that.
>>42059271and a male vampire??
>>42059280It depends on why they were Interested In turning me in the first place but maybe regardless. I can't Imagine why they would choose someone like me.
>>42059292What if a male vampire shows up at your place tomorrow night and you notice he has a big bulge?
>>42059295Kek sorry mate I'm not gay
>>42059303He smiles at you."I notice that you noticed my bulge. It's big, I know. Do you want to live forever?"
>>42059307Sure unless he actually expects me to be gay in exchange ha ha
>>42059329Mmmm...
>>42058289>It's because I'm the best /vamp/ poster and I've returned.No, that was B. (RIP)
>>42059537I'll take best surviving /vamp/ poster.
>>42059722Still no
>>42059737Nonsense, if not me than who is?
>>42059745Me and I can think about at lest 2 others who are also better
>>42059757You're just horny for some vampbooba
>>42059772I dont care about vampboobas
>>42059823Cindy will NEVER FUCK YOUCINDY FEET
I'm a vampire, if you suck my rick you'll become immortal. Do you want to make a deal?
>>42059873Sure.
>>42059757I'm highly dubious.>>42059823Why not?>>42059873How many times?
>>42052759Are vampires really this sexy?
i don't think the vampire society would really care for inducting an ambitionless neet into their ranks but i mean if they wanna show up they can show up i guess
>>42052980I hope so.
>>42060080>I'm highly dubious.I only speak truth>Why not?Why yes?
>>42052747Lol no way nigga, I'll come back in 20 years, like an aged wine
>>42052980>Necesito una latina vampira pelirroja, donde eres > :^)>pic unrelated
>>42055681Chevere, asere, donde eres?
>>42053068>>42053187nigga david rockefeller died at 101 years old, if drinking child blood barely adds 17 years to your life compared to a japanese villager that shits laughable
>>42063050Yeah. And he got a heart transplant and the best medical care available through his wealth. All of these rich elite people who get old also tend to look like shit and aren't very lively. So this idea that humans drinking blood or children's blood does anything impactful is retarded. Japanese look and age better by just applying sun screen and eating beans and fish staying fitter than any Rockefeller.
>>42052980this type of posts and threads would be so fun if it was 2016 and I was 15/16 years old
>>42063074>unc is still here
>>42063095Uncs are immortal now..
>>42052899come over to the werefox thread and yiff with us
>>42052747>>42052759you wish you were gay?
>>42052747How do I get these vampires to contact me? Ive been ready for awhile
>>42065145>look for teeth lactation
>>42052747>It'll make you immortal... just take the dealMany folk that take such a deal realize immortality is a curse without someone else to spend it with. Why else do you think they wanted you? >>42052793I'd partially agree here, the idea of modern vampires (that being undead that has magical power) is a deliberate falsity. The ideals of classical vampires come from a long linage of alchemists, pagans and kings all wanting to extend their lifespans for as long as possible.Honestly history is far more gruesome than one could imagine.>King Henry VII>Charles II of Spain>Qin Shi Huang>Adolf Frederick of Sweden >>42053090> all these rich "elite" people drinking the blood of children allegedly age like shit, look old as fuck, need organ transplants and literally age fasterNow their looking for genetic editing to save them. It's all a fools errand that does nothing but ply the wealthy from their riches.
>>42065267i could do it. im alone 6 months of the year for work.
>>42065317>I could do itPersonally I find great joy in the knowledge I will eventually cease to be. The true fullness of immortality is knowing that your actions will irreversibly change the future just by your existence in the great tapestry that is humanity. Why ignore the call of death to listlessly wander the Earth. Those who fear death and seek to eliminate it are cowards who wish to avoid eternal punishment only to prolong their flagrant indulgences.
>>42052747when they inevitably drive a stake through your heart, your flesh will be devoured by monsters you couldn't have fathomed.
>>42058313Where is that, if you don't mind my asking? Also, it's interesting. I'm known to overindulge in sweets, and I do love Hematogen. However, it's the ONLY thing that still gives me a sugar crash afterwards. Must be my American metabolism being unused to the Russian beet sugar maybe.
>>42065660the first layer of hell seems cozy. spent my entire life watching the world pass by. there's a comfort and nostalgia to it.
Ultimately, the alleged eternity a vampire can offer is not true, you don't want to be a vampire during the Second Advent. He is the truth and the only way to eternal life.
>>42065660>cowards who wish to avoid eternal punishmentNo such thing as eternal punishment. If anything people who desire immortality do so because they have recognized that the afterlife is a sham sold to gullible sheep and there is no reward for being a slave.
>>42066002I'm really not gonna give a shit about a God who doesn't lift a finger helping kids getting fucked on Epstein Island because he respects the "free will" of the child rapists too much. Lmfao.
>>42066006>No such thing as eternal punishment.Alright, lets say there is absolutely nothing afterwards no reward, no punishment. Existence vs EntropyThose who wish to live forever fight against the basis of the universe, which is nothingness. Entropy means that one day all the Sun will explode stars in the sky will all burn out, matter will scatter amongst the stars in pure chaos leaving the immortal in an impossible void where no life or stable matter can exist. So those who wish to preserve themselves until the end of time receive the same fate, absolute nothingness. Just excruciatingly slower.
>>42066039Escape to another universe before this one ends. Of course if vampires are real it means at least some supernatural things are real, but the fantasy of them is appealing regardless. I just think anon is an idiot for thinking its a way to dodge hell. Vamps were popular 10-15 years ago BECAUSE it was the height of nihilist thinking. Gen Z believe in the supernatural at a greater rate and counterintuitively are less interested in vampires as a result.
>Escape to another universe before this one ends.So which is it? You feel God is a fantastical delusion yet you blatantly reject the laws of physics. There is no scientific evidence parallel worlds in the way movies often portray. So that escape would be mathematically impossible. I'd agree the fantasy crafted by movies and TV is designed to be appealing to those who oppose the idea of God. It allows for lower classes of society to apply a delusion of power and class to themselves, which reduces the amount of helplessness they feel in wider society. All while the "true vampires" depicted in history (that being a ruthless and bloodthirsty ruling class) absorb all of the wealth and try to prolong the inevitable.
>>42066333They are both delusions anon. They both exist as stories to cope with our mortality anon. Death, true death is 100% inevitable an inescapable. I am not about to argue it isn't. But when it comes to fantasy I think the vampire is more interesting than heaven and no one interested in this fantasy does so out of a fear of going to hell.
>>42066458>They are both delusions anon. Both Science and God? To be frank that's quite a unique take. On the nature of fantasy:It's understandable why most people would choose to believe in television in science over putting faith in the gospels. As there is no moral punishment for wrongdoing, so outside of the law or social standing a person can do whatever they please without any issues. I believe the want to become one outlines a broader social issue. The willful concept that a person could derive power and a longer life by causing suffering in others is socially damaging. In the history of vampires, the idea was to portray those in power or the "other" as monsters. Wanting to harm your community, neighbors and wider society is troubling. Take the nature of faith or science as an example. Faith seeks to appeal to a higher power through moral virtue. Science seeks to observe and study the nature of the universe. Both are goals which can unify cultures. Wanting to become a vampire is a destructive fantasy.
>>42066022#God, being The Father, hurts more than you or I hurt for those children. God, being the author of justice, and the source of all reason, is not the idiot you assume him to be.
>>42066531"Science" and God yes, both fantasy. That vampires require the life of others to sustain their immortality is what makes them believable. Everything good in this world is the result of taking from someone else. I DO believe in the metaphysical anon and this seems to be the way it actually works. Christianity is Bullshit, Eastern Religions are Bullshit, New Age is bullshit and the one thing that isn't is the elites total control of this world physically and metaphysically.
>>42066552Not enough to do anything. We have all heard the religious excuses for God's inaction so don't bother. World is done with your crap.
>>42066571>Everything good in this world is the result of taking from someone else.I'd strongly go against this notion. The antithesis to such thought is apparent in every corner of the world through giving. The Earth gives humans crops, we give each other homes and give ourselves purpose. Rather than selfishly taking everything "good" for ourselves it's possible to provide for the less fortunate and to help those around you. Don't let yourself be isolated and broken. There is always hope in tomorrow, even in death is rest.>The elites total control of this world physically and metaphysically.See THAT's exactly the point of the traditional vampire story. Instead of joining the monsters the original focus was showing the only way to cut out the cancerous ideology is with the unification of the masses (connecting community under a single concept), determination through hope (faith in something other than ones self) and the destruction of the core philosophy guiding such monsters usually focusing on the heart (moral corruption) or head(emotionless logic).
>>42066652Those who want to become vampires have entirely missed the point.
>>42066652Those crops are living things and deplete the soil and if you really want something good you go with meat which taste better by orders of magnitude.If you want to insist vampirism is a metaphor for the elite, then it is obviously wishful thinking as the elites ALWAYS win in the end, a few unlucky ones lose their heads occasionally but the pattern is stable throughout history.
>>42052747>believe in god>throw him under the bus because you got oldLolIm sure he wont mind that
>>42062231You made my snecko appear why? he’s heartless
>>42066583>lmfaoI'm probably wasting my time so fuck you in advance.I'm all for promptly executing the Epsteins of the world, in a traditional Christian government, a monarchy, which is the christian ideal and not a liberal democratic jewish controlled republic, people like that meet the sword fast. You are skipping centuries of history and a long chain of events that led up to Epstein. The United States is a child of the French Revolution that "killed" God in Europe, centuries past now, and when people stray from God for generations upon generations evil motherfuckers becoming powerful is a natural consequence. The Bible itself writes about this thousands of years before you were born.God didn't force Woodrow Willson to sign over America's financial system over to the Rotschilds, in the same way that God didn't write the Scofield bible, or force evangelicals to become Israel's golems: see Iran. Just the other day a missile hit an all girls school there killing many. "Why didn't God stop the missile?"I'm not your therapist, I'm not here to console you or listen to your emotional appeals so don't give me that shit. Human inaction and human evil actions cause this and within history that's what happens with civilizations at a certain point because of human weakness and pathology. The solution to Epstein's island, among many other modern grievances is a majority Christian society protected by an authoritarian Christian monarchy, responsible before God.
>>42066740>The elite pedophiles wouldn't be able to operate if we had a good old fashioned Christian Monarchy Just when I thought Christcucks couldn't get any dumber. I might remind you that Prince Andrew and other Royals went to the Island.
>>42066760>the exception makes the ruleI'm sure Andrew isn't a representative of all English monarchs in history, but I don't even care to defend non-orthodox monarchies, I'm looking at the Byzantine Empire and the Russian Empire and their relevant royal families as examples, both of which lasted almost a millenium as civilizations. Also, and this is true for most monarchies in history - shitty kings get dethroned sooner or later.
>>42066776The history of Europe is full of degenerate Kings and Priests and they usually are NOT deposed. This is really easy to research BTW and I encourage anyone reading this (Christian or not) to look it up to see if going back to Monarchy sounds like a good idea.
>>42052747Damn, I wish vampires were real and not just HIV-riddled emo kids. I'd totally be a vampire if they were real, I was always a night life gal anyway.
>>42066814night life gal?
>>42066800Pragmatically, if you want to reduce it to numbers you have one tyrant or drunkard every few centuries across a thousand years compared to permanent corruption and the wide open vulnerability of democracy, which is a free for all buffet for any Satanic secret society, bankster criminal syndicate, mad scientists or intelligence agency psyops. You've never had a cult of blackmailed pedophiles running the world back when monarchies were a thing.
>>42052747I wish vampires were real, if they were I'd sign up in a heartbeat. Wouldn't have to worry about my severe health problems, wouldn't have to worry about surviving in this lame society. I could just sit on the sidelines and watch history unfold. As much as I hate this timeline, I can't help but have a morbid curiosity in seeing where things go. Not being able to go out in the sunlight isn't an issue, I've operated on a third shift sleep schedule for nearly 20 years.
>>42052980Vamps, contact me, you have until midnight today
>>42066552Ok? Totally irrelevant. God could have made sure this would have never happened to those kids. He literally let it happen and made a decision not to intervene.
>>42058289You are not a vampire. Stop posting to the contrary.
>>42067690You have no idea who the fuck I even am, little retard.
Seems legit and not a way to get sacrificed or something.Fairly certain any real vampire isn't recruiting on a major public message board op.Also unless your 80 your diets probably shit op and that's likely why you feel "old".
>>42066740lol you crack me up. Your post just totally glosses over and ignores the absolute mountain of atrocities committed by christian monarchys in the name of god. Never mind all the child sexual abuse in recent years by christian clergy.>>42066882>you have one tyrant or drunkard every few centuriesWhat?Well you certainly exemplify the qualities I most identify with the most devout of christians.>>42067690Or...?>>42067707You aren't me!
>>42068062This isn't me.
None of you are me. I am the only one who can be me (probably).
>>42066677And humans give plants water, sunlight and fertile soil to grow. Humans give animals shelter and food. In turn, animals give back milk and wool. Tree's drop fruit, which was genetically designed (via by Evolution or God) for animals to eat. We could go on yes there is some taking and giving. Both are in balance.>the elites ALWAYS win in the endThere's another firm lesson you can take out of these stories. Death comes for us all, one ruler dies and another takes their place either by force or via the will of the people. Instead of destroying society for power, build up your own community and grow stronger together.
>>42066882>You've never had a cult of blackmailed pedophiles running the world back when monarchies were a thing.Citation needed.
>>42069192the end
>>42052793Nice fucking tripcode faggot
>>42069192The burden of proof is on you by the way. Source? History. The worst emperors like Ivan the Terrible and Phocas weren't controlled by a foreign kingdom but only by their short-sighted evil retarded impulses. And even then they're in the minority, maybe 5% out of all of the rulers, the majority of which were 'just ok', with stable and uneventful reigns. Wouldn't you like politics to be boring and your politicians to have no scandals? I've looked at the dynasties of the Byzantine and Russian empires, you'd expect to find bloodthirsty Jeoffrey Baratheons with every succession but that's not the case.
>>42069671Uneventful reigns=/= no secret cabal of pedos.Come on anon anyone who knows about the elites, knows they have been ruling from the shadows for MILENIA.
>>42068316True! It's me, and don't you forget it.>>42069671You could only possibly have the luxury of believing the nonsense you believe in a democracy. You've romanticized the idea of a monarchy well beyond the actual brutal facts of one. >The solution to Epstein's island, among many other modern grievances is a majority Christian society protected by an authoritarian Christian monarchy, responsible before God.This idea is a joke. Responsible before God alone? God is silent. Every theocracy in history has been responsible for horrible atrocities. Every one. It's not a coincidence. When you answer to god alone and not the people of your nation, you answer to nobody. It is only very rare humans that can withstand the pressures of such power year after year without succumbing to it, and you rely on simple luck to get those people into power in a monarchy.It is nonsense. >>42069907Nobody is ruling you from the shadows. Or rather, there are so many competing groups trying to rule you from the shadows that they struggle to get much done long-term.Your idea that there is one group controlling the world is total fantasy. If that were the case the world would look very different indeed. It's a child's fearful notion; somebody must be in charge. The harder to face but nevertheless true reality is much more concerning.Nobody is in charge.
>>42069923Do you feel like a "child" or youth inside? Or do you feel old, mature and look even at 50 year old humans as kids?
>>42069963I don't feel old at all, but yes you all mostly seem like children. 'Maturity' is a rare and admirable trait and 85% of humans don't have it, regardless of age.
>>42069987You prefer mature humans?
>>42069987I kinda want to be a 500 year old vampire but look 25 and then call old people "my child" fr fr
>>42069995What do you mean by 'prefer'?>>42069999I've seen someone about that age called 'my child' or something similar by someone even older. It does seem pretty fun.
>>42069923terminal normie brainrot
>>42070009How old are you by now?
Imagine you are 1000 old vampire. You are from times when people were shorter. You are stuck being manlet. The manlet eternal.That and not being able to eat food or walk in daylight must be making this miserable experience.Also your memory would probably be shit because you cant remember everything
>>42070083>You are from times when people were shorter. You are stuck being manlet. The manlet eternal.So just move to east asia, everyone is short over there. >not being able to eat food or walk in daylight must be making this miserable experienceThe idea that vampires can't eat food is inconsistent and mostly a modern invention. Same goes for the idea that they can't handle sunlight. Hell, even in Bram Stoker's novel Dracula was able to walk around in sunlight. The idea that they can't go in the sun comes from the film Nosferatu. But even if you can't eat food and walk around in the daytime, so what?>Also your memory would probably be shit because you cant remember everythingSo you write in journals. Problem solved.
>>42070176>So just move to east asia, everyone is short over there.Asians are scary>The idea that vampires can't eat food is inconsistent and mostly a modern invention. Same goes for the idea that they can't handle sunlight. Hell, even in Bram Stoker's novel Dracula was able to walk around in sunlight.Its common trope and since we dont have any evidence of what they can/cant do I am going with this theory. Also both Dracula and Carmilla (inspiration for Dracula) were getting fucked over by Sun.>But even if you can't eat food and walk around in the daytime, so what?Unironically most unhinged thing I read on /x/. If you can't eat food, so what? What the fuck do you mean by "so what" ???¨>So you write in journals. Problem solved.Impractical, way too many journals needed for such a long lifespan
Vampires are all children of Satan but they cannot defeat Jesus Holy Water the Holy Land Garlic and the Cross these are Vampires greatest weaknesses
How do vampires make money?
I feel like the vampires here who say they slay people (1 or 2 humans per week) for blood make sense. And the vampires who say they just take a drink from people make more sense. There are just not enough people who go missing without ever returning. Most people who go missing show up again, last time I read about 80-90% of reported missing people show up in the first 24-48 hours again. And another % shows up after a few weeks, months or years.If you only have 6000 vampires worldwide and each one would drain 1 person per week this would be 312 000 people per year who never show up again. And that's not counting in all the humans who disappear forever through murder, suicide, trafficking. Now if there are even more than 6000 vampires worldwide or they need more than 1 person per week, that would boost the numbers even more. Am I not getting something here?
>>42072206At a rate of one kill a week a vampire couldn't hide anywhere smaller than a very major city (somewhere like New York or LA) without becoming a noticeable demographic feature, and you certainly couldn't have more than one vampire living anywhere in even remotely the same general area.
>>42072342>>42072206Oh yeah, I wanted to say in my post the vampires who say they slay people once per week or more often make NO* sense. Typo. And I agree with your post.
>>42072187I think they work at hot topic probably
>>42070070265 this year.>>42070083Why would a Vampire care about this? What are the disadvantages of being short that you suppose would cause a Vampire annoyance or discomfort?>>42072187It varies. It's easy to make money over time if you already have a bunch, and there are a lot of ways to get that first nest-egg built. A popular one is doing odd jobs for richer Vampires.
>>42073747Let me eat you, stupid vampire.
>>42073747>Why would a Vampire care about this?Sorry but noone will take you seriously if you are 150 cm short, little boy. >What are the disadvantages of being short that you suppose would cause a Vampire annoyance or discomfort?Imagine you are in a supermarket and you need something thats on the top shelf. You would have to ask a nearby adult for help. Embarrassing!Also you would not be allowed on certain attractions and rides in Disney world and neither you would be allowed in a pool thats too deep.
>>42073879https://archive.4plebs.org/x/thread/38921992/#38925572So how tall are u lil dude??
>>42073883VERY tall
>>42073865No!>>42073879150cm? That's really short even for a woman.>Imagine you are in a supermarket and you need something thats on the top shelf.Just never buy anything on the top shelf, problem solved.>Also you would not be allowed on certain attractions and rides in Disney worldhttps://disneyworld.disney.go.com/faq/parks/height-requirements/Looks like it's only small children that need to worry about that.>and neither you would be allowed in a pool thats too deep.I swim in the ocean anon.
>>42052747vampires don't exist though
>>42059155like a big veiny penis?
>>42074209Sounds like something a vampire would say.
>>42052747Vampire here. I'm from an old lineage. I didn't really get to pick if I want to be or not. You forget you have to live life at 50% because you need to avoid the sun. I often tell myself I didn't ask for this. There are always hunters looking for you, and the only way to deter them is to just be unbelievably strong in a confrontation if not outright kick his ass. I would say my biggest obstacle is finding a partner without intimidating or seducing them. Seduction seems like a great power, until you realize it's even more fleeting than love is. TLDR fuck off, we're full
>>42054196>AAAAAH GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME I KNOW WHAT YOU ARE>It's true.... I am half-vampire...>AAAAAH WHAT THE FUCK YOU'RE ALSO A VAMPIRE?
>>42052747Fuck no, not gonna take it. Eternal life sounds absolutely fucking horrible.Vampires are bunch of pussyass bitches anyway.
>>42074191You don't have to entertain every ridiculous notion every anon throws at you. This particular line of inquiry is dreadfully dull yet you engage, like a reverse-Grove. Say something unique about being a Vuh-vuh-Vampire instead of confounding about these throwaway comments. Say something vampy that only one who has seen the change of things over centuries would say.
>>42081317Nigga no one cares what you think or want lmao
>>42052747shut the fuck up you little zoomer incel. vampires aren't real
>>42081317In my memory I sit by the fire with M. We're alone together in the haven (the Old Bitch rests in the corner). He turns to me with a funny look and says 'let's really get this fire going', Five minutes later and I'm handing him wood and him and the Old Bitch (I've never seen her naked before, the sight is compelling!) are chopping it and feeding it to the flames. It's marvelous seeing such a fine lady chopping wood.In Four Minutes the fire is roaring (far beyond mortal tolerance, barely controlled) and we're sitting far too close (the Old Bitch lies naked not two feet from the flames, she's in no danger, she's tasted hotter). M turns to me with a funny look and says sagely (in his wisest voice, the accent long dead) 'you can learn all you need to know about the world in a roaring fire'. I'm pondering this for Three minutes before I turn to him and he bursts out laughing.Later in The Night the phone rings and when M returns from answering it he asks me if I will help him (Will I help him fight? butcher? massacre?). Soon enough we're alone together in the car (the Old Bitch is laying in the back seat, saying not a word). When we arrive M knocks on the door, polite as you like, but it's the Old Bitch who is first through it (the wood, the skin, the flesh, the bone, the brain and on out again) and the Enforcer (where is M?) is following right after her and by the time the fellow who answered is realizing he's dead they're already dancing at the top of the stairs (It is hard to say who is leading). There is a loud popping noise and I take cover thinking of gunfire (it's not, they're just dancing a little too fast) but then the gunfire really starts (and soon stops).It doesn't take Two minutes for her to drink her fill. It doesn't take One. Later M is back and the Old Bitch is peaking over his shoulder, innocent as you like (as though she didn't just turn over a dozen people into meat). He surveys the silent manor and turns to me with a funny look and says
>>42052747bro, your afterlife?
>>42082910What does he say???
>>42074191>Just never buy anything on the top shelf, problem solved.Not true. We keep the best stuff on top shelves, to keep it safe from your kind (your kind is "manlets" btw)>I swim in the ocean anon.with an adult supervising you?>>42082910I am bored Varan.Do you still run your little silly club houses?
>>42083194>Not true. We keep the best stuff on top shelves, to keep it safe from your kind (your kind is "manlets" btw)But I don't even need to eat food.>with an adult supervising you?Yes yes, very droll.>I am bored Varan.I'm not Varan.
>>42083207You answer troll but don't finish the story?!
>>42083242It is finished, that's the end.
>>42083243What did he say though...
>>42083244What do you think?
>>42082910One thing I don't understand is why did you lie about stuff not related to your safety or vampire secrets. In 2011 you said you saw a werewolf, they are real and one is your pen-pal. A few years later you are asked about werewolves and you say they don't exist, you never saw one and think it's just a myth. Why?
>>42083242I NEVER troll
>>42083253In that specific example I feel I overstepped earlier. I feel it's generally rude to talk about people without their knowledge. When it came up again I simply denied it outright rather than having to worry about being rude. I do that kind of stuff all the time. Sometimes I don't want to explain something, sometimes I can't. There's some other things I mentioned in my very early posts that I wish I hadn't. It didn't occur to me that people would be reading them years later.>>42083277Same!
>>42083335But there's a difference between giving details about a specific person ("This werewolf is my pal") and just straight up lying saying werewolves aren't real. You confirmed other supernatural beings without their consent or even years later bring up Vampires here with names and more details than the alleged werewolf friend. And it didn't sound like you had a personal relationship where you would ask if they mind if you post about them on 4chan.
>>42083359With no prior knowledge lying simply removes werewolves as a topic of conversation, if I say they don't exist, I don't have to tip-toe around questions about them, it just ceases to be a concern at all. It only didn't work because people like you are digging through stuff I said 15 years ago.>You confirmed other supernatural beings without their consentTrue, but I have little reason to believe they can be offended.>even years later bring up Vampires here with names and more details than the alleged werewolf friend.To be clear, while the names (name?) I revealed are their real actual names, they are not the names they use with the general public, so I don't think that's anything to worry about. You can see an easy example of me avoiding typing out a full name in my little 'story'. I don't think 'M' would mind my revealing his name, but anyone his name would matter to already knows who he is (and would even without the initial, desu), and everyone else doesn't need to know.>And it didn't sound like you had a personal relationship where you would ask if they mind if you post about them on 4chan.What are you referring to here exactly?
>>42082682I am rubber and you are glue etc etc.(also, fuck you)
>>42052747That's just one of the few wishes I have left in life even if I know how unrealistic it is, if any cutie vampire yandere wife is out to get herself a snack then I let you in.
>>42082910so what did the jerk-off say?
>>42084695He surveys the silent manor and turns to me with a funny look and says in that same wise voice he used by the hearth 'see? just like a fire.'I wait, because with M there is always another log to throw on. 'A good blaze' he continued, stepping over a fellow who used to be guarding the stairs, 'starts with a spark. Then someone brings wood. Then the whole room gets warm whether it asked to or not'Behind him the Old Bitch smiles over his shoulder, red to the elbows and pleased with herself, like a dog that’s chased something important out of the woods. M smiles, opening the car door. 'Eventually,' he says, 'everything in the world is just waiting to burn.'
>>42084766I enjoyed this story, thank you.
>>42084695What do you think he says?>>42084766Haha, not quite. You've misunderstood the nature of the Old Bitch.>>42084854That wasn't me. But if you prefer that ending that's all the same to me.
>>42085156>What do you think he says?Something that makes you fall madly in love with him...:^)>That wasn't me. But if you prefer that ending that's all the same to meI prefer true ending.
>>42082910>and says
>>42074191did your sire ever tell you why out of all humans he met he made you immortal? what was your relationship like?
>>42069923>>42073747Could you help me out with some immortality? The reason being I have a lot of books to read and maybe not enough time to read them all. I would really love to spend an entire century on a poetry book or symphony or something. You know?
Who is this Knife Wielding Bird !nRzenPsSa.?
>>42052980Rollin'
>>42087437Thats me!
>>42059865i need to nut
>>42087437years ago /x/ had regular vampire generals kind of like the succubus general today, they were big and active threads and it went on for a long time and knife wielding bird was one of the original tripfags from that time/general
>>42085277>Something that makes you fall madly in love with him...Ha, no.>I prefer true ending.Well, you've read it. >>42085975>did your sire ever tell you why out of all humans he met he made you immortal?He never told me no.>what was your relationship like?Brief. I only knew him a few months. He was cold, distant. Very practical and matter-of-fact. My theory has always been that he knew he was going to kill himself and wanted someone around to remember him. It wouldn't surprise me if he picked me literally the first night he saw me, totally at random.>>42087412Sorry, I'm not looking to help anyone out with that.>>42087437Yeah who?>>42088602Good times!
But this guy here >>42088626 precedes them all and might be the original vampire here AMA guy of all-time on 4chan cause he's been doing it since at least 2011. Or did you see anyone do it before you? /x/ exist since 2007 but I wasn't around that early
>>42088632Oh I've been using 4chan since before /x/ was even a thing, I can still recall the 'creepypasta' threads on /b/ that preceded the creation of /x/. I didn't post 'openly' until '08 I believe.>Or did you see anyone do it before you?No, but it's possible I wasn't first. Sure seems like there was quite a few after me though. All inferior, of course.
>>42088645Made me chuckle. I guess the quality of questions never changed. "What a fine question...">Sure seems like there was quite a few after me though. All inferior, of course.Do you have any theory as to why this phenomena died out like it did? In the past, there would be a thread from a "Vampire" answering questions occasionally, putting themselves out there and so on. Some of these individuals were quite persistent too, posting and remaining for many years to come. But this activity (primarily the threads made by the alleged Vampires themselves) seemed to have died out completely since 2021 or so? Not counting psychic vampire retards.
>>42088684>Made me chuckle. I guess the quality of questions never changed.True but the quality has always been highly variable. I've been asked some very astute things by some very perceptive people, and some truly inane things by some real dumbasses, but that's humanity for you I suppose.>Do you have any theory as to why this phenomena died out like it did?Oh I wouldn't say it's died out. Here we are, after all>But this activity (primarily the threads made by the alleged Vampires themselves) seemed to have died out completely since 2021 or so?The thing is, threads are always carried by a relatively small number of active participants. In any given thread you need at least a few people actually willing to discuss/argue about the topic for it to thrive. Vampires are rare. I've no reason to assume any of the other posters were legitimate, and if not that requires a certain rare level of creativity and imagination to actually be compelling or consistent enough to withstand scrutiny and generate discussion.At any rate I'm unconvinced /vamp/ is actually dead. Just dormant. Even in this thread there are various references to the 'Vampires' Grove, Cindy and Varan, who must be fairly recent to still be so strongly remembered. Although to be fair one of those references was by KWB, who I'm halfway sure has accused me of being Varan before, and one of the others was, I believe, referenced by you. Whoever you are.
>>42088733You are here occasionally but you're not actively making threads offering to answer questions as far as I can tell. Including you, there were at least 4 (maybe more) different "Vampires" actively creating threads between 2011-2021. This has since died out almost completely, just going by the archive. Some of them disappeared, others just very rarely pop into threads other people make and post a little. Mostly anonymously too, so if you don't know "the signs" (lol) you won't even be able to tell. >Varan, who must be fairly recent to still be so strongly remembered. Although to be fair one of those references was by KWB, who I'm halfway sure has accused me of being Varan before, and one of the others was, I believe, referenced by you. Whoever you are.He was quite active for a long time and had this thing to write dramatic stories about his past. I think that's what made you appear to be him to Bird in that situation. Not to me of course, I knew it's not Varan, because I'm extremely high IQ: 101, which is a whole point above average, and therefore enormous! ;3
>>42088733I guess I forgot the whole "Dance" thing and true, that was not that long ago in 2024. But that counts as you and I think the threads were still made by others, don't remember exactly.
>>42088770Well I can't speak for the others, but I just haven't really had the time/been in the mood to make threads and make a spectacle of myself. I'm pretty content just to lurk and keep tabs on what's going on usually. >Not to me of course, I knew it's not Varan, because I'm extremely high IQ: 101, which is a whole point above average, and therefore enormous! ;3Ah of course. I know who you are now. Umbra Sanguine.>>42088785>I guess I forgot the whole "Dance" thing and true, that was not that long ago in 2024.Dance thing? You mean the red dot posting? That wasn't 2024 was it?
>>42088800>Umbra Sanguine.Yes! The one and only.>Dance thing? You mean the red dot posting?That's not what I mean. I don't think we should talk about this (and yes obviously, kind of goofy because I brought it up) because I don't like being lied to. Just pretend I am insane and you have no idea what I am talking about, that works for me.
>>42088813What are you talking about? Why would I need to lie?>Just pretend I am insane and you have no idea what I am talking about, that works for me.Easily done, since I truly have no idea what you're talking about.Obviously if you don't want to talk about something we don't have to. I'm completely mystified right now though. Well whatever, as you will.
>>42088837I am insane. ^_^
>>42088841Surely you can at least give me a hint? I've never thought you were crazy. Quite the opposite actually. I'll do my best not to lie, though of course that's always a risk.
>>42088848You got some throwaway email for me to send you my clarification to? You can just close that email directly afterwards and continue here. Or not. It's not that deep or important.
>>42088856Sure: vamplolol@proton.meHow exciting!
>>42088733>I'm halfway sure has accused me of being Varan beforedesu you are both so similiar
>>42088912Doubtful. For starters, he's probably taller. But if he's even close to my majesty, my intelligence, my charisma and yes, my humility then by the gods, he must be quite a guy.
>>42088936>For starters, he's probably tallerHe claims to be 800 years old or so, so big doubt
>>42088874I had to step away from the computer for a bit, but I send it now.
>>42088973He did brag about being a very tall viking (like 189cm or more?) and also that he constantly had sex with women but also men and shemales. That does set the two apart.
>>42088989I highly doubt that he was 20cm taller than average back then. I believe the sex with men thing
>>42088983I've deleted that email address, thanks!
>>42089028>I believe the sex with men thingI almost spit out my drink
>>42089035No problemo!
is blood magick real?
>>42089044Reading through this archive, you really think this is me? Seems like a generic /vamp/ imposter to me so far, though you've given me more than enough reason to read the entire thing, so I guess I'll see. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯>>42089056No.
>>42089057Is it a coincidence that you two live in the same city and house/apartment too?!But yes, I thought "she" was fun and eloquent although obviously in some ways crafted as an ideal fantasy for men. It's not very different from you. I mean the fun and eloquent, the fantasy for men... not sure about that part. But we are on 4chan after all.
>>42089077Who said anything about a coincidence? I'm still reading, give me a sec.
>>42089092>what really happened
>>42089101lel can I have one of these I look like count duckula crossed with salt bae as an Ozzie from a tourist town
>>42089107Umm?
>>42089101>I am 103. I am living m first life as I type this. What species of vampire? A term springs to mind, but I can't share it, sorry.Oh this narrows it down quite a bit. I've changed my mind.>You know, you're the second person to call me autistic here, I'm starting to wonder if maybe I am. Can you point to any particular signs? I'd be interested to learn this about myself if it's true.Oh this is autism for sure.>>42089044I lied about deleting the email please check it.
>>42089077>you two live in the same city and house/apartment too?!um????
>>42089156I astral projected over there. And I involved the FBI too.>>42089133Sure thing.
>>42089160>I astral projected over there.Impossible, you are the biggest muggle I know...
>>42089163Maybe even muggles can evolve given enough time.
>>42052747How would I know that a vampire has contacted me?
>>42089174you wake up with aids
>>42052747Mark 8:36For what shall it profit a man, if he shall gain the whole world, and lose his own soul?
>>42052759so onision almost tricked you, no its good you said no. Don't be retarded OP
>>42052747>Please listen to me. If a vampire ever contacts you offering to make you immortal... just take the deal. Ten years ago, back when I was much younger, I had that exact opportunity. I said no because I was super religious and committed to God. Now I feel old and weak. And I'm gonna be honest I wish I said yes.
Is this what the guys who post on x about being vampires look like?
>>420700835'11 dudes think being "tall" is somehow preferable than being an immortal apex predator that could do anything they want
>>42090335he mogs you unc
>>42093499He doesn't even mog what is in my toilet after a big shit
