https://youtu.be/j3LZFiYMj0w?si=Yq2dClwUQZCFSaPMThe most unpleasant precarious and downright stupid immortality blueprint was drafted by the ancient Egyptians. First you have to get yourself mummified, and that was very expensive, making immortality a monopoly of the truly rich. Then, your continued immortality in the Western Lands is entirely dependent on the continuous existence of your mummy, and that is why they had their mummies hid good. You’re just plain GI Joe and he’s got enough Baraka (enough energy) to survive his first physical death, though he won’t get far. He’s got no mummy he’s got no names, he’s got nothing! What happens to a bum like that? A nameless mummiless asshole? Why, demons will swarm all over him at the first checkpoint, he will be dismembered and thrown into a flaming pit where his soul will be utterly consumed and destroyed, while others (with sound mummies, with the right names to drop in the right faces) hail through to the Western Lands. There are, of course, some who just barely squeeze through, though their mummies are not in a good sound condition. These creeps can only live in the third rate transient hotels just beyond the last checkpoint where they can still smell the charnel house disposal ovens in their skimpy balconies. ‘Might as well face the facts, my mummy’s going downhill. I don’t even feel like a human, God maggots is crawling all over, the way that demon guard looked at me this morning…’. (1/2)
>>42290321Here you are in a luxury condo deep in the Western Lands, you’ve got no security! Say some disgruntled former employees sneak in and throw acid on your mummy! Slosh gasoline all over and burn the shit out of it! ‘Ooooh someone is fucking with my mummy!’ Boy you are fucked. Let’s face it, mummies are sitting ducks. No matter who you are, what can happen to your mummy is a Pharaoh’s nightmare! Floods, volcanoes, earthquakes, perhaps the mummy‘s best friend is an Egyptologist. In museums, they’re safe from spiteful enemies, grave robbers, and scavengers, and kept a constant temperature. But, air raid sirens! It’s the blitz! ‘For God’s sake get us into the vaults!’ scream throats without a tongue. This deal stinks like a dead camel! Long dead! Anyone buy in on a thing like that should have mummy examined, don’t take us for dumber than we look! And the Johnson’s are taking over the Western Lands, ‘We bought it. We built it. We paid for it. It’s ours and we’re gonna take it.’ (End)
