Who is the best girl and why is it Shinobu?
I broke up with Hitagi and now I'm receiving constant death threats and vandalised property. Am I somehow in the wrong here?
>>287689580Sex with nobu.
Which Monogatari girl is most likely to be a rapist?
>>287689771Kanbaru, always Kanbaru.
>>287689771Mayoi, I don't trust those beady little eyes.
>>287689580Big tits megane cat girl of course.
>>287689771snek
>>287689580Nadeko.>>287689771Also Nadeko.>>287689872Yes.
>>287689838I mean have you seen what she did to Araragi in her adult form?
>>287689771Tsukihi.
Hitagi raped me for attempting to break up with her. I'm going to have to marry her, aren't I?
>>287689924Is Tsukihi really a yandere brocon?
>>287689890I'm not that far yet, what does she do?
>>287689771Hitagi.
Kanbaru wouldn't rape me because she told me she was a lesbian. I can trust her, right?
>>287689771Hanekawa.
Guys, I want to marry Yotsugi.
>>287689771Kagenui.
>>287690180I wouldn't let her watch me undress. Even stripping a jacket might trigger the instincts of a perverse hunter.
>>287690431What happens of she sees you without your shirt on?
I want to aggressively flirt with Kagenui and then suddenly stop when she catches feelings.
>>287690583I want to tease the hag.
Pumping and dumping snek.
>>287690180Big mistake.
>>287689947Just fake your death.
Hitagi Senjougahara is yandere for you and is forcing you to marry her. How do you escape?
>>287690770I DISAPPEAR INTO THE NIGHT!
>>287689771Skeehee.
>>287690770I wait for the next solar eclipse, get trapped in the Demon Castle and then become King of the Vampires.
>>287690770I move countries.
>>287689771Tsukihi or Nadeko at a specific time. Kanbaru has been tested and she's a big chicken. Anyone that claims Kanbaru doesn't understand the character. It's amost as bad as saying Araragi is a lolicon.
Hitagi raped me and called me an idiot after I agreed to walk her home gently.
>>287690298
>>287690935>Tsukihi or Nadeko at a specific timeHow would they rape you?
>>287690050She does what Araragi did to her.
>>287690972A combination of violence and pills.
>>287690987Based.
>>287689580New episodes WHEN?
>>287690994Interesting, now WHY would they rape you?
>>287691004After Madoka movie aka never.
>>287690770I court either Tsukihi or Nadeko.
How would anons do as Karen and Tsukihi's onii-san?
>>287691006Now we are asking the real monogatari questions. For Tsukihi I can only imagine some kind of revenge rape or to assert dominance. Nadeko is closer to a delusional dream come true rape making it seem like it's not her fault but yours. I guess Tsukihi is the violence and Nadeko is the pills part.
>>287691042I wonder what an anon would've done to get such reactions from them.
>>287691042Violently raped by bird...
>>287691037I'd probably no way fag them, Snek, too.
This thread needs healing from wholesome math fairy who can't hurt anyone but herself.https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eEurvYRvbYA
>>287691009>aka neverBut I need my dose of life optimism.
>>287691127Well, they are working on it :)
Reading the Sodachi fiasco bros and let me tell you im gosling it all the way through
>>287691222The next step is getting a doll then.
>>287689771Birbs can rape too, you know...
Someone please post the chainsawman ending monogatari edit. I've been looking for it. Kind bump.
>>287691317Imagine getting raped by skeehee.
>>287691317Imagine being her big brother and getting raped by her daily.
>>287691222I need math
YOU HEAR ME ANON, I WILL FIND YOU AND YOU WILL FUCK MY SISTERS! THE ARARAGI BLOODLINE CAN ONLY CONTINUE WITH YOUR HELP, ANON AND YOU'RE HELPING, WHETHER YOU LIKE IT OR NOT!
>>287691524No way fag.
>>287691524No thanks, bro.
>>287691499She looks weak to anal.
>>287691611You look gay
I had sex with snek, she cried tears of joy and kept muttering to herself, so I decided to skip town on her.
>>287691317How and why would birb rape you?
>>287691701You're gay.
Yotsugi raped me.
>>287689580I like everyone, except snek
>>287692036Why?
>>287692036
>>287692036Don't worry Mommydachi will fix Sneedeko
>>287692036>>287692069>>287692103Is snek the type of girl who would accuse you of cheating on her even if you're practically strangers?
>>287692139If you treat her badly
When's the off and monster season 2 coming out you fucking faggots?
>>287692151What if I don't treat her like anything?
>>287692195Is it gay to want to fuck Ougi?
>>287692357No.
>>287692357
>>287690583
>>287692478
>>287693058>the floor is lava *smiles*
>>287693058I want to court her, get her to fall in love with me and when things get serious, tell her I'm not the marrying type.
>>287693223You have schizophrenia.
>>287693223You have based tastes.
>>287691524Do it yourself, faggot.
Wife that you need to princess carry everywhere
Yeah I can't wait to see kusogaki Kagenui annoying young Oshino animated in 2046.
>>287693223I'd always tease her, make it look like I'm ready to commit to her only to back out at the last possible moment and then play dumb when confronted.
>>287693346I'd hang out with her as an excuse to fuck Yotsugi.
>>287693303It's funny because if she gets mad, you can set her down on the couch and steal her shoes.
>>287693408Based.
>>287693482Kek.
>>287689580
>>287689771Shinobu.
>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qcIqeq83tO0Remember the best outro?
>>287695171Of course.Not my #1 but at least top 5.
>>287695421I need 'Nobu in every other girl's outfit immediately
>>287696461>girlsI don't think I ever collected them though
>>287696514Extremely skinnynobu
>>287696534I gotchu
>>287690298sorry you can't as I am already married to her
>>287690935How is Araragi not a lolicon?
>give monkey my bat as a present>expect her to go to town on that blonde loli ass>she chickens out
>>287697472?
>>287698823No one would say any of this if they weren'tno one would treat mayoi like that if they weren'tno one would be as cool a character if they weren'tso I'm very glad that they are not
>>287692069
>>287699379I for one prefer my series to be about more than just porn
>>287700004
>>287690770She's garbage.
>>287693260>>287693058Tell me she touches the ground in the finale and fucking dies immediately
>>287693058these kinds of phones do NOT belong in mono
>>287700242Prove it
>>287701887It's not her that dies if she touches the ground bro.
>>287702460You just have to princess carry her around everywhere to be safe.
>>287703517
>>287700079
>>287703553CUTE frilly bikini>>287703594>you came already?
>>287703607
>>287692036Wrong answer.
>>287703782>>287703911feetsin my mouth
>>287703782That skirt looks so flippable in that position
>>287704196
>>287703594Were I a shotacon, I'd be glad I have what you call composure.
>>287700079>>287703594the only girl to trick me into cumming to dreamworks face
>>287689580A Snail is fine too
>>287698823Monogatari is THE unreliable narrator series. If Araragi isn't lying to the reader, he is definitely lying to himself.
>>287691061brush their older sister's teeth
>>287691767Don't you know ducks are massive rapists? When you think about it a phoenix is basically a duck, but on fire...
>>287691524this is exactly like the ending of children of dune
>>287691382
>>287705691Snail by herself doesn't do much for me but Snail x Bat is freaking goated.
>>287706695How bout Snail x Bat x Doll?
>>287693223>>287693346Weird how you want to piss off a woman who can fistfight polar bears.
>>287689717>Shinobu wearing pantsuI refuse to believe this.
>>287706734A real triple threat!But still, what's Doll bringing to the table that i don't get with Bat & Snail?
>>287707115What's she gonna do about it?
FATCATTATS
>>287689771Monkey easily
I prefer big fat bat tats.
>>287707900
Which Monogatari has the most pleasant voice? Which would you want as an audiobook narrator if their seiyuus somehow managed to learn English.
FATSNAIL...shell
A cat is fine, too.
>>287707913imagine the sex https://files.catbox.moe/mrcvuo.png
>>287708776Death by snusnu then vamp powers heals you for more death by snusnu.
>>287689580adult form Shinobu, that or adult snail
>>287709677Based.
>>287708671Fat cat tats.
>>287689717>this imageNobu feels like she really is made for prone bone anal.
>>287711316Agreed.
>>287689580Snail
>>287707900To be a rapist anon, not to be raped.
Snail raped me.
>>287711913HACHIKUJIIIIIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEY
>>287689580It's Hachikuji, both by personality and body.
Well /a/?
>>287713122Shinobu.
>>287713122Yotsugi.
>>287713122Yeah
>>287689580Ok, /a/, it's time to stop joking. We all know that Mayoi is best girl, so no more pretending that she isn't. From now on, the question will be "who is second best girl" because we all know Mayoi is best
>>287713122>the 100 year old corpse tsukumogami>the 21 year old ghost>the 300 year old vampireThey have an excuse for everything!
>>287698823It's totally not irony.
>>287713679>the 300 year old vampireYou'd like that wouldn't you?Too bad! What you see is a 598yo hag-pire!
>>287713122
>>287713122The autist.
What would sex with Yotsugi be like?
>>287714321No one else but me is allowed to know
>>287714427I know, though.
>>287714427You don't know, either. Look at those eyebrows, you fucked an impostor.
>>287691082every gatari thread is about the girlsis there anything else to the show or is it just about girls thirsting for some dude?
>>287714821There's more to the show, it's just the girls are fantastic.
>>287714427I fucked her in the ass, it was cold and slimy.
>>287689771Crab.
>>287714821After dipping in many many threads on here I feel like every single /a/ general is like this, even the shonen ones.
>>287715692This is why generals should be prohibited. All the gooner squads should have a containment thread and the board will be made 150% better.
>>287714321Like warm bags of sand.
>>287689580Based taste
>>287712908
>>287714821Snek is a fucking meal bros
>>287719886And it's delicious.
Do they really need 2 years to finish one season?
>>287691317>home alone with aniichan
>>287720714>finishThe 2nd part of O&M hasn't even started anon. We are currently in Madoka movie production hell. Just forget about it, treat it as a nice surprise whenever it comes out.
>>287720827Well, you're probably right, im not used to getting my hopes up anyway. In essence, it's fine.
>>287720714Turns out two years is just how long it takes to properly animate Shinobu's ass. They spare no expense.
>>287714821This series is extremely horny, almost every character is female and a lot of the character drama is romantic or sexual in nature, but it does actually treat their issues seriously and dignifies them as people. Two things can be true at the same time. The protagonist starts dating his girlfriend in Episode 5 and that relationship is never questioned or significantly threatened.
>>287723006Gahara is ride or murder-suicide
Are Karen and Tsukihi brocons?
>>287714821the jokes.
>>287725415
Am I the only one that likes Numachi?I mean she isn't making top 5 or anything but I kinda dig how she's one of the more "crazy hardcore" characters in the show in a way (Tooe is probably the most hardcore).
>>287724673doesnt he have sex with the loli vamp and molest the other loli?anyway i like sexy anime so I'll probably watch it. i have to watch order saved.
>>287726577Prepare for dialogue anon. Despite what this thread would make you think, there is actually a lot going on with the characters in this show. The sexy stuff is great though.
>>287726577>doesnt he have sex with the loli vampI don't remember this happening>and molest the other loli?Snail? Like every single time she appears.
Licking Shinobu!
>>287726577>i have to watch order savedDouble retard
I'd love a threeway with Hanekawa and Kanbaru Who would be your ideal pairing?
>>287727005the*
>Araragi gets an immortal body, OP loli companion, and some vampire powers>Shinobu gets the death and revival she wanted along with an immortal supportive companion she neededMasterful storytelling spinning this power fantasy as tragic.
>>287728337Ragi's bad for her, he declawed her like a cat. What she needs is a rescue attempt.
>>287727616Hanekawa and Shinobu
>>287727616A threeway with two Hanekawas, obviously.
it's so weird being a massive fan of this show and also a homosexual because the fan service does almost nothing for me sexually and ranges from meh to genuinely very interesting narratively.
>>287714821Besides what the other anons said, its music is fantastic and its visual aesthetic is really one of a kind. The dialogue is fast and witty without ever becoming obnoxious (think Rick and Morty) or drunk off the smell of its own farts and the themes it tackles are usually handled with more tact and care than you'd guess at first glance, especially by anime standards.You can of course watch it just for the experience of your cock stiffening whenever Hanekawa is on the screen, but the show would still be worth watching if the girls were all replaced with low effort microsoft paint doodles,
>>287729571...I wonder what it's like to look at an attractive woman and not feel even the slightest hint of lust and longing.Did that one Kizumonogatari scene do it for you, though?
>>287702092Yeah, anime phones MUST be flip phones. Yes, even in current year.
>>287729571>almost nothingwhat's the residual part that does? does arararagi being turned on turn you on?
>>287728432Carlos!
>>287729762Yes and it made me crave more Koyomi fan service because the one big scene we got was fucking masterful at it.>>287729980It's often this. The directing is so strong in this show that it manages to convey sexual desire really impressively, and there's an element of vicarious enjoyment through Araragi's perspective for me. It's also worth noting this show has a couple of notable exceptions to my homosexuality, like how Kanbaru is a lesbian with occasional exceptions. Her and (Black) Hanekawa are both very rare cases of hot women.Also incest is wincest and is generally the big exception that makes women possible to sexualise. That toothbrush scene works for me.
>>287711929>Monkey>The one being rapedI think you misunderstand the situation anon
>>287689771Silly anon girls can't be rapists.
Why are vampires in japanese fiction only ever blonde (Kiss-Shot, Dio, Arcueid...) or silver-haired (Castlevania)?
>>287731448because vampires hail from europe and in anime europeans typically have blonde hair. right? that's gotta be it.
>>287731448Because vampires are only a thing in the west, especially their connotations of being sophisticated upper class nobility. Nip folklore is honestly really boring, no matter how much they endlessly wank themselves.
Though now that I think about it, Hellsing's Alucard has black hair.
>>287731733in the beach special it's confirmed he dyes it
>>287731733Some are pink, some are even purple!
>>287714821started watching, wtf pantsu in the first 7 seconds. amazing.i won't post during the episodes, first episode was weird as shit, very unusual animation and i am totally confused but it's very interesting.
>>287732454Hanekawa has quite the thigh gap despite being the designated thicc girl of the cast.
>>287732454Please report back after episode 2 anon.
>>287732558will do, i am taking a short break to make a coffee and think about that episode, then i will watch the second and i may continue on, it's getting late for me but i'm intrigued.
reminder that bat is simply better than everyone else and you can't argue thissorry i don't make the rules
>>2876895808 year old btw
>>287732895Hmmm close
short hair boynobu
watched the second episode.that was a nice little arc, it explained a lot of things. senjougahara seems different at the end. clearly something is going on with aragari. the episode felt like it was over in a flash, a clear sign i am enjoying it. it's unlikely any other anime i've seen. i'm guessing those text segments that flash on screen are from the novel? some of them fly by too fast to read, i'll go back and read the ones i couldn't.
>>287733323also i see why the girls are talked about so much, it's erotic without being trashy. and it's funny.
>>287733323Yeah the text is from the novels. It's usually Araragi's inner thoughts and can be fun to pause on a rewatch. I don't think it's worth ruining the flow to read it on a first watch.
>>287733323If you vibed with the directing and focus on dialogue and characters instead of getting put off by it, then you got past the wall that keeps most people from watching this.The other wall is the sexy stuff that normies find uncomfortable.
>>287733387i am not pausing the episodes, i think narrative flow is important.they note the typeface, that is incredibly unusual. but common in books.
>>287732454It takes a minute to get used to the style and by the end you want more like it
>>287733430i think the dialogue is what makes it so engrossing. the animation is so unusual, i thought i would hate the clipart but it's unique. the girls are very hot. i've seen the usual webms posted before, i lurked the threads but gleaned little.obviously going to watch this whole series, i'll probably stay up a little longer.
>stationary on her pantieslol
>>287733515It's not unusual to come for the fanservice but stay for the character interactions. I remember watching Bake after To Love Ru back in 2008 just because I wanted more funny harem. No idea what I was getting myself into.>>287733532Lots of attention to detail. What is your watch order btw?
>>287733637this is what i found on nyaa
this ending is great, i'm usually pretty ambivalent about them but it's nice and punchy.
>>287733323I was hoping you'd enjoy the bantz while also getting to see Crab undressing for ten minutes straight!
>>287733917The ED takes me directly right back to 2009, it's so nostalgic.
>>287733984oh i was looking. such a nice body.they introduced snail this episode; tasty loli. i like everything about this show. the dialogue is just relentless, i'm a fast reader so i have no problem following it but damn it is so dense. whoever wrote this is brilliant.
the animation is a lot of fun
>>287733900Yeah that's the novel order which is pretty much perfect.If you want to be really anal about spoiler-y openings then you can skip the openings from Koyomimonogatari episodes 8 and 9.
Tsukihi raped me for smelling like Nadeko and Nadeko raped me for smelling like Tsukihi. It never ends.
>>287734213The snake or the egg type of conundrum.
mmm lolis...
>>287734282Catchy opening appreciator.
>>287714427But I know.
>>287734213Just take a shower.
>>287734046Agreed.
>>287713122cover_of_tanabe_kyou_doujinshi.jpg
>>287689872>>287689879I think nadeko would be more of a domestic abuse kind of rapist, not a general kind of rapist
anal with karen
>>287730790What does an home of sexual think of best girl kaiki
>>287734046I need a wife to die so I can marry my (in-law) sister...
>>287732496thicc =/= fat
>>287735679anal with tsukihi.
>>287735664>I think nadeko would be more of a domestic abuse kind of rapist, not a general kind of rapistExplain.
I want to walk Crab home gently. That's what she meant, right?
>>287736649Yes.
>>287689580surely anons here are gonna watch the translated commentary of tsukihi undo that just came out. snake and bird are doing the duo this time
>im gay>goonposting>im gay>more goonpostingYeah this is /a/ right now. Check the catalogue once or twice a week, click on 1-2 threads, the exact same repeats over and over again. Cya next week
>>287737160Oh I wasn't aware. Nice nice.
What's the true essence of the monogatari series, anon?
>>287737314Cute boy doing cute things to cute girls.
>>287714821The real reason is because loli is banned on the NSFW boards, so they have to make their threads on /a/. That's why Monogatari threads are usually just people dumping image folders and making /e/-esque comments. So people see the stealth /e/ threads, mistake them for real Monogatari threads, and try to talk about the series in them.General rule of thumb is that you can tell the difference by the OP. If it's something like "who's the most rape-able girl and why is it ____?", "would you have sex with your sister?", or has erotic fanart, it's probably just /e/ coming over.
>>287735584Instructions unclear; now I smell like Shinobu.
>>287735679
>>287737599You're gonna get double raped, then.
>>287737599Now Crab's gonna rape you, too.
>>287737314Yotsugi's cheeks
>>287737784Kek, let her try.
>>287733917ARE GA DENEBU ARUTAIRU BEGA>>287734035Ah, this is a fantastic scene.>I didn't dress like this for you, Araragi-kunI bet you didn't, bitch, ahaha...>>287737512But what about the horny Cat threads, then?
How would each Monogatari girl rape you?
>>287738922By me saying "Oh no, please don't :^)"
>>287738700>I didn't dress like this for you, Araragi-kunWait that wasn't it. It was more subtle like:I didn't want to show it to you, I wanted you to see it.
>>287740122Ah, yeah, I knew it was something like that, but couldn't remember the exact wording. Great scene.
>>287740182It also ties in way later when she meets with Kaiki during Koi in her school uniform.
