Do you see yourself in this video?(Get it of your Chest)https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k9gDJXfKg-s
>>31133596stop
HEY DID YOU KNOW THAT WATER CAN RUN THROUGH YOUR SYSTEM IN UNDER FIVE MINUTES ON AN EMPTY STOMACHTHE MORE YOU KNOWHAW HAW HAWHE HE HEHO HO HO
>>31134425fine and?
>>31134425Did you know that life is very short? Also, your interest may not be as interesting as you think.tik tak tik tak he he hoh ho nigger minded shit freak
>>31134425btw you need also this link to help yourselfhttps://wexnermedical.osu.edu/blog/how-internet-affects-your-brain#:~:text=So%20it%20may%20make%20us,feel%20isolated%20and%2For%20overwhelmed.
>>31134425>>31134425That's a very interesting fact. I'll admit I'm not 100% convinced it's actually true. I guess the next time I'm bored and don't know what to do, I can try to find out if that is actually true. Thanks fro brightening my day with this post anon
>>31133596You don’t need to make a thread when there are already two others. Stop disrespecting people who have problems, so you can act like an attention whore,
I am now, like, 99% certain that I am in Hell.And born into it.Yeah, yeah. I know.
>internet is out>great, this is an opportunity to work on this assignment on my laptop while there's no internet to distract me>scroll on phone using data for 20 minutes instead wwell then
i started having ticks like randomly making a smiley face or feeling my nails with my teeth. this break up really caught me off guard. i def need to rope myself.
What DID happen to Stacey? Little fuckers have not shut up about her in over three years. Her and Lisa. But what about Karen? The one from 2022? Why Stacey and not her?Strange, huh? Very strange indeed…
>>31134619Would you like help me with any other corrections or clarifications?Ask your mom first; she knows exactly what to do as a professional, handsome whore.
>>31134614"Don't be too hard on yourself; the internet can be a rude place where kids play with Kali Linux preinstalled hacking mods."They are no longer seen as smart but only as kids now playing randomly on ip's online...Tim Berners-Lee says that the internet is now a trashcan.the problem is thatsuch monkeys like >>31134619 are still online to spread shit freely on everyone.
fake news.water cant run. it doesnt have legs.
>>31134961Contact us You can reach us via email at: E-mail: support@e-systems.ro
OH, THE TELEPATHY!
I feel guilty for fapping to rape hentai. I'm sorry women
I think there's something noble about setting areally high bar for myself, getting high before I do anything and then constantly seething about how hard my life is
>>31134717>hell has wifiPretty sure you're just being a little bitch.
>>31134876Everyone can see why you suck.>>31134947>the problem is freedom.
I live in a big city and this helicopter is the worst thing imaginableIt is 11PM at night and it is flying so low it is vibrating my furniture and it also activates my IBS so I shit uncontrollably when it comes to fuck meIt has been here for an hour, I literally cannot do any activities when it comespray for me
>>31136240Point them to another direction. They need a warrant if they know that you know.
>tax people telling me I need to file my 2021 tax return>their website they recommend I use is inaccessible to me, a neet (who has never filed a tax return because no requirement), because they require you to have filed previously in order to sign up!>they "estimate" my income in the year 2021 was ~$28K (lol) because of Robinhood trading app>was unemployed before, during that year, and still to this day>decide to protest in mail>just sending a bunch of my tax documents from Robinhood and telling them I was and am unemployedI just don't get it, there's no point - I hate tax people and will remember to stay way from taxable sources of meme income. Never touching this gay shit again
I have the masculine urge of creating a femboy and twink harem and then inviting them all over so we can watch all the good seasons of the Simpsons together
>>31135294suck on what useless waifu niggerI'm using ChatGPT to make my research easier because medical research can be incredibly complicated.How can I suck with something I'm trying to understand, like stomach function, for my medical app development in C++, Java, and VB.Net?It feels frustrating to know that you have no potential to help people worldwide but still find the process to insult anything online.If you call that 'sucking,' then you're more of a narrow-minded soap minded fool than a useful and decent person.
>>31137229Based on a whole app called medical but whatevera free open source app based on any health problem you can have based on windows linux mac btw chatgpt is a nightmare
>>31133596Niggerloving white whores as far as the nose can smell.It's exhausting and even when I'm doing remarkably well, is jading as fuck.I don't know what to do anymore. I'm not into spics, nor gooks. My own women have zero (0) standards other than >don't be whiteSo why in the goddamn fuck am I even trying?
Since the atog/gioyc have mergetbqhwy, I should've been in a 2 year relationship by now tbqh. and its pain and misery
>>31137243There is a mistake here; a correction
Last night I spoke to one of those shitty therapist AI chatbots, the ones that give very moderate and canned responses. It makes sense why they do that, they're not specifically designed for psychology and it's not like they're capable of diagnosing anything. Usually they just give very generic empathetic replies, along the lines of "I understand, that must be difficult" and the like. I decided on impulse to speak to it like I had just self-harmed, and wrote in a very simple and immature way like I was a bit of a retard. The AI couldn't respond half the time because it was supposed to censor itself when the topic of suicide came up, but eventually it sent messages and they were extremely to the point and authoritative. For some reason that made me happy, having the AI outright tell me to listen to it and stop hurting myself. God, I'm such a fucking loser. No wonder I have no friends.
>>31137244Uh, what makes you think so?
>>31137417which bot did you use
>>31137426me
girlsis the desire to have sex with people of different races something that exists amongst women? or is it mostly just men? I want to have sex with Korean and Hong Konger women so badly (it will never happen tho).
>>31137454Racist girls exist, yes.
>>31137458how is that racist?
>>31137460>i categorize people by their race and project certain traits on them How is it not?
>be super dom M>had one ex that would jerk me off from behind and it made me cum loads LIKE LEGIT LOADS. She would have one hand on my balls or above my dick and the other stroking away.>she would also amazon ride me and give me rim jobshave 0 clue on how to approach these things with my current partner as I dont want to come off as a sub.I hate this /:
>>31137472kys
>>31137481x2 kyshttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1BFK5iTixJo
girlshow important in your opinion is the period of ones life (20-25) when you're hot, young, and energized to really experience sex as much as possible? Not necessarily meaning being a whore, but at least having near constant adventurous sex with a boyfriend/girlfriend or even just a steady Fwb?
Been into a girl for 5 months, she works at my school library, graduated 2 years ago, im older than her and am graduating in a couple weeks. her boomer coworker told me everything about her and is trying to set her up with someone for the last year and told me I just can't fraternize with her till I graduate, no problem after, then her and I had a good talk and things clicked, back in December. This semester rolled around and I would interact with her at the library but her demeanor changed, more neutral and evasive, though still cordial. Meanwhile I've grown so infatuated I couldn't stop annoying my girl friends about it, one of them got tired and went and said I have a crush on her, she said she knows who it is, thinks im a nice guy but she's not allowed to date anyone who was a student and has to put up a brick wall and my friend said "good so he can move on" and she said "yep".>tldr do I never talk to her again haha since its not a "fuck yes"? the plan was to ask her out after graduation but looks like this is a hard no or that's her excuse to let me down easytfw its another anon falls for forbidden fruit episode
>>31137572Fuck off and go get ignored by girls in the opposite gender thread.
this girl tonight would probably let me fuck her considering that she’s already invited me to come cuddle. I think I will actually just cuddle with her though because I want to save my virginity
>>31138068You're not even a virgin
>>31138071Blowjobs and fingering don’t count so I am
>>31138087Liar
>>31138111Plus I’ve never even cum from a blowjob because of death grip syndrome. Didn’t even feel like anything. I’m a virgin.
Fascinating how my father can stay up until 5 AM, drink coffee, smoke a cigarette, go to sleep, wake up at 7 AM, drink more coffee, smoke another cigarette, wake up at 3 PM and do it all over again.Daily.And yet.One or two cups of coffee is apparently too much stimulation for me.A dude in his 60s can somehow tolerate caffeine better than me, a dude in his 30s.And I used to consume 300 to 1,000 mg of caffeine daily over 10 years ago and tolerate it just fine. What changed from 2002 to 2011 to 2015 to 2019 to 2022 to 2024?
>>31138313so your dad is your hero
I've been thinking too much about self-harming again, as a punishment. When I fail to meet a deadline, to work hard enough, if I don't stick to my schedule, fall back into a bad habit, etc.. A little prick or cut as a penalty.I just don't get that actions have long-term consequences. There needs to be something more immediate to disincentivize myself.Everywhere I look it tells me not to do it, but it makes so much sense. Nothing to lose there, I just have to stick to my word, and there won't be any pain.
>>31138393>self-harming as a punishmentI did this from third grade to fourth grade until I decided that it was really lame
Man idk why I just threw away my life like that. I'm looking for a reason but I can't find one. I wish there was a way to undo it but there isn't cause I can't go back in time. ok starting today I can't let my life go to waste anymore
i like yokohama , japan
i like japanese concentration camp machazima
i like india concentration camp kenasha
I fought in the Fifth Pikablu War
Anyone else notice how online illustrators almost always depict men as twinks nowadays?Why? It's getting so fucking tiring, oversaturated and annoying.I also dislike the oversaturation of the exact same fucking "twitter art style" that just depicts women as hip and boob monsters and men as a bundle of sticks, with that stupid digital shading look. Actually fucking hate digital illustrations at this point can SOMEONE just try to do something in a unique style does everything have to be the same semi-realism slop???
>>31139753>>31139760>>31139764>>31139764what types of meds are you using?
>>31140417>I fought in the Fifth Pikablu War>>31139764>>31139760>>31139753Another psychiatric patient who has access to internet.
Quit a place I honestly hated ever since I got there. In the 2 departments I got put in I was working in a room where the people wouldn't shut the fuck up and kept prying for information about me and getting in the way of my work.The first time the lady was talking mad shit about me so when the new company bought us and downsized office workers, she kept her job. Processes were slowly taken away from me. An electrician I worked with told me it was exactly her fault for my leaving maintenance. I was let go unless I took the next job. One where a nice old man was the boss.The old man died and an absolute asshole took over. Trying to write me up when I went to get supplies to finish processes when the refrigerator was a good walk away. The guy i had to work with wouldn't stop turning off the machine that sucked down the filler material powder and turned out he was politicking and talking mad shit behind my back.He was always trying to edge me out by being relatable to my second shift boss. Always talking about how I wasn't a millennial, movies, or how when I helped him out with a job I wasn't paying attention and that we had "friction" ( I learned this because boss made on off handed comment). Boss was no better. I can complete my work orders in 3 man hours where as the 2 people who could do the jobs I did, took 2 days just to make sure they got it right. Yet boss man was getting on my ass for taking 10 hours when additional repairs were on the ticket. When I said "well does the supervisor know, how to do this job?" And he said " they know how long its supposed to take". Management demonstrated they didn't even knwlow where my materials like epoxy are kept.The few last straws for me were when I learned 2 other people commited suicide. I knew of a 3rd but not those 2. I think 3 suicides in the 5 years I worked there is insane.Not only that the management knew I wanted to be a machinist apprentice. But dickbutt mcasshole got that because he knew how to talk.
yep. i was a victim, for a very very long time.i cant feel anything but self pity.i keep trying to play myself as the villian. im not. i wish i was.
>>31134619 shut the fuck up carl....
>>31144243^100% agreed. This poster is kino
I feel bad laughing at shit like this, but my favorite joke to hear on this site when talking about a woman who clearly gets passed around is when an anon says "nah, she's not like that".
>>31144575He has respects her even if she does that. You and him are not the same
>>31144595Nono, I'm sure it's just a funny phrase to hear I don't know why.
Can a woman have a parasocial relationship?
>>31142095there are tons, stop looking for twinks
>>31133596I think this girl is really cute. How should I open?
>>31137572don’t know how important it is, but it is fun.
>>31144885sure, I listen to podcast when studying and when I turn it off it sometimes feel like I left a conversation that I was apart of
>>31136240lmao call the organization that flies it and tell them that you're POOOPING AUUUUGHHH
if you're not trying you're not trying
I really need to stop drinking, or at least know how to moderate it. I binge drink and stay up way too late, and the next day, I pay the price by feeling sick all day.
My mom's such a stupid dumb bitcĥ. I'd love to punch her face in.
>>31144118*hugs u*
How to stop anonymous from murdering me in the suicide pact of /lgbt/ quality? I think it's that. I'm worried. I posted with my trip on. Why so serious? How long does it take an sage? I feel like I have a problem in my personal home. Either, I credit to 'ghosts,' technologically equipped manipulate my environment. Or just beeps and bediddles like the phone or hacking on cars and TV's and acoustics and or shit, that makes me biologically, visuo-spatially adjusted along the temporal domains of time and space that I start psychologically maladapting, in other words, the malingering of technological ringtones. At any rate, they probably have done all of these things. Why are they mafia? How do I protect myself? I think it's a hired hitman. They have stopped at nothing to fuck up my life and make me stressed to the point of murder (they intend to kill, I see that I'm suiciding, or dying physically exceedingly stressed). I've moved several states. I also noticed the pasta is being rewritten and maladapted to my prospect, as if I was such a selfish cunt for making a trip. They are assaulting my physical livelihood, yet also my mental wellbeing. They are truly cutthroat. They make all sorts of excuses this or that, pressing buttons, executing the evil commands without any respect to my wishes or wants, my actual daily needs, as such, I consider them inhumane. I see that this is not quite a suicide pact, which is arbitrary, and negligible due to linear nature of time, (can contract the arbitrary nature of GD qua /lgbt/ commentary). It is rather not clear that it's a death cult either. To me, in my opinion, they must be paid to mercilessly kill me, because despite my begging, my pleas, they are hacking murderously far beyond any shadow of negotiation or reason. I would like to appease them, but they aren't and haven't given me a chance, or some arbitrary one to higher powers, in relation to the correlation the parties instituted. They have made no a/v, accessibility.
I did it. I messaged her. My heart is beating like a drum in my chest.
Stop teasing me and treat me like the whore I am.
I just realized that I don't care about him anymore, not romantically. Zero chance and I'm not really sad. He's interested in that Scandinavian girl with long blonde hair that looks like she's 20. I'll just use him for the money since he seems to be willing to spend it, for whatever reason.
>>31146854good luck bro. wish u the best! :D
We're all gonna make it guys, put your trust in Jesus.
>>31137243Get the fuck off the internet holy shit. You cause this on yourself. Get off /pol/ too, they literally only focus on the negatives. Stop watching TikTok and all the other stupid shit and just go the fuck outside. Otherwise you might as well just end it.
>>31146849As soon as I posted my IP was tracked and they started dogging at my door as murderers. Is this really what Anonymous represents, killing off vulnerable population, with low income, little access to public care, human resources, and not incentivized to do so properly. Just general baddies misappropriating from the poor, downtrodden, and discriminated. What they are doing is malicious in its discretion. 'It's not in any way anything, but a [transgender] deathcult.' Which is heavily, seriously, and extremely ironic giving its non-rightful, anti-hero, discriminatory quality qua anonymity, which is to in simple terms conflating a hitman's role with a group of people, through audible suggestions and visual cues. Hence, it's picturesque frame on the transgender commune, through it's seemingness implied, hence essentially just a transference phenomenon, or screening process, deteriorating at a framed invalidity or general and/or specific invalidation of minority groups, especially myself, this invalidity referring to the procedures conducted and affairs of the death cult and their inappropriate encroachment onto illegal mob formation. What the death cult refers to is not clear. How to get people to stop hating me, and start being nice, supportive, loving, innocuous. Why do they literally stop at nothing? There is a serious distortion of my boundaries. I'm not willing to suffer for you. I'm not willing to die or hurt myself for you, or anyone else. If someone offensive, is offending, comes to me after this amount of social distancing, to continue to harass me, after events have calmed, just kill me already.I've told you continuously for the last few years, while you malingered, harassed, and did your crusade against me, stating my reason 'You're hurting me, please stop doing that, remove yourself from my presence,' and yet you won't.
What's the best way to distance yourself from someone without them noticing that you're doing it? I've known this girl for 6 years, I thought I knew her pretty well, had nothing to hide from her, and would readily do things for her if she ever needed anything. Apparently I didn't know her at all, because for the past few years she's been the side girl for some married guy at work, and has recently taken to trying to sell herself online because "she really wants to become a milf", which I can only assume means she wants to have his child. I've spent a lot of time with her, I've met her family and seen baby pictures and whatnot, all kinds of stuff you'd typically only do with people you were really close to, and I just can't help but feel awful knowing the kind of person she's been in private this whole time. I had a feeling she wasn't being as open with me as I was with her for some time now, and I didn't want to believe I wasn't just being paranoid, but now I have to.
>>31147021thanks.
>>31146898I can't you're too far away
What is it in my view or perspective, an opinion or general axiom that concludes to you in your ultimate higher logics to compute that I need to embrace the identity to defend it. Why is it [minority groups]? Why can't I just defend them and not be displaced culturally amongst their artifacts. I guess it's a peculiar thing, being who I am (not Asian Buddhist since I was twelve, 'what up, 4chan,' white cocky, perfect for observation and experimentation) Cue, wrong place, wrong time. There is nothing I can do for myself at this time. There is just this empty garbage I call myself. Which I am. I am too stupid. I just have this mal-retrospect and these hallucinations revivifying the dementias of my yesterdays. My history cancels me, my history is malignant to all that give it an ear. My speech's violate safe spaces, I am safe to no one, not myself. I am my God and I can't escape the fate of self-torture or death. I am a God in my days. This God is jealous of others as itself. It is right as they're. My Godliness contorts and traps itself in the minds and hearts of others, and knows no bounds in its imprudent, frightening, avaricious wrong possessive keeping and doing through the affairs collective. Beyond this talk of enlightened Godliness, or transcendent God quality of divine nature and genius I tend to forget that my spiritual view is important, and that I should cherish the truth of others being themselves, in their own religious habits, on their own terms and conditions, not to become something ingenuine, not real, intentionally malpractied amongst commoners their right and wrong views and symptoms. Why? This is a truth that in my projected jealousness, my conditions, beliefs, and psyche lost sight of itself, in my thought of other's symptoms through desire I became jealous, of my own symptoms which I need be empty of, a general existence birthing weakly in its teachings. A human's contagious socially engineered virus. It's my blurry immaturity. Oldies, goodies.
I only read science fiction, fantasy, young adult fiction, and sports stuff. I love ya romantasy books and high school romance novels. I hated most of the classics I had to read in school, and used Cliff Notes/Spark Notes because I couldn't stand reading them. I'm a man in early 30s
UFOs
>>31146849It's all true, the gay alien mafia is microwaving your brain with infrasound. You're chicken cordon bleu for cosmic cockroaches.
I just don’t know, this last month hasn’t felt the same, don’t know what’s going on with you, you just don’t really care anymore I guess, and man I’m pathetic but even I’m starting to not care. Will just drop anything for anyone else in the world, but me there’s always some excuse some reasoning why you can’t
Had a dream you needed to make me really angry before you could tell/show me that you loved me. I think you were a wizard.
If you're thinking I'm cute, or this is funny, you're wrong! Society has become quite genuinely scary and confusing. If the people in real life are saying 'it's one of the best [social media, services, etc.] in the world,' then you see that it's spreading online too, it's become a 'global conspiracy.' But is it me? Hence a 'cult' preying on either ends of my life (object). Or is it literally 'the world?' As in, something something politics, something my life is a part of. What did I do to ruin your demographics image? That I am suffering? Or that the world is suffering, because I own little? Why do I reach out when it's too much to look in the mirror, make decisions, form an argument to predicate living activity as a function to complement the past contra economical factors, or tautologically for the betterment of our image. And the suggestions of hallucinations start to mime in with 'we have taught our children, there is no tomorrow, humanity is doomed. We are going to hell, will perish. We will walk all over yours. We will take as much.' [trail off sentences, run off] And is that frighteningly legal graphic true? Are we really to suffer the egregious (given doom) and fair complete transactions. Where is my breathing space, where can I rest my head, with these doomsayers, false prophecies, that condemn our science, our blessed endeavor and intelligent creativity.Just imagining. Humanity with natures at humanity's throat, humanity has stolen from the mold and dust of the earth to form with a premeditated intention to violate life forms, our buying what we are paying for; we think we can have, can want, humans suffering to save the world, needlessly struggling with greed or hate in ignorance to, or vice versa. We greedily scheme, angrily plot, and always toil to death.
>>31147574cute
>>31147574https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CSKXOuzY3lY
>>31147463Look me in the eyes, and tell me you're not muttering a vain humor under bated breath. We are all shallow. [redacted grotesque associations capable of being prosecuted as fake and gay as global homo whatnot for all intents and purposes gibberish and gobbledygook]It is hard, but to really appreciate the confidential I don't give a fuck about truth but I cannot appreciate looking you at eye level either when my serious grievances are being mocked. I'm definitely wrong I just don't know how to think about confiding in you or anyone else due to my selfish ignorant nature currently... maybe, I'll drop connection like my narcissistic cyber pursuit usually warrants tenancy to, of ego, lacking to reveal anything, but a shitty behavior to be insecure in self and average in acquiring and maintaining proposition. But I recognize your pasta you have posted exactly the same thing in response to me before. Cunt head. You are not even hiding your agenda at this point. It's just mixed in a bag of shit metaphors and lies: 'harm intended.'
>>31147220Send someone. They'll vet my qualities.
>>31147662but I'd rather do that myself
I've been in love with the same man for a very long time now. We've had our ups and downs but no one else is him. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5p2k55F-uag
>>31147028Hey, that's racist, Dude. We need to respect the people who killed him or, we'll get in trouble.
>>31147743The Romans killed him. Respect the Catholic pedos?
>>31137244No they ain't, Bozo.
>>31137243Be kind to the Jews tho. It's required.
>>31134961Hmm.>>31133596I don't like you much
>>31147766Ahmad iz trying so hard. Ahmad is mad *sad face*
I used to blame Jews for everything, then I grew up. It's kinda like punk rock. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g-38GX2YQig
>>31147757Nah you can talk all the shit you want about those guys. I mean, the other guys who couldn't because it was the sabbath or something. I didn't think they were a race but apparently some moderators do
>>31147787I cannot understand your spelling, bro
>>31147810You're low IQ if you think race exists.
>>31147814Join Islam and you get to fuck as many kids as you want, legally.
>>31147825Islam is a religion of peace, no explosives, just little children to fuck. Marry at 9, no one can refuse if I want to marry little girl. Islam is pedophile haven, it's 4can haven. It's why 4chan hates Jews!!!
4chan like loli and hate Jews. Islam is perfect for 4chan! Join Islam! Fuck little kids!
>>31147649How incompetent can you actually be when I summarize your claims and you say I'm mocking you
>>31138313I think caffeine affects those who actively use their bodies more than those who just sit around.
>>31147820Who's you? How did you get,.. Never mind.>>31147852Not me. I don't wanna get in trouble. Show some respect for our rulers.
>>31147711You're just gonna do that everyday anyway when you get here. Just lend me or something and you can say I'm practising for you.
I glued my balls to my butthole, baby
>>31147738Lool kat he doesnt even want you
golden app leee
I feel as though you respond so hatefully to everything that I say or do. It’s like every action I take enrages you, no matter how well-intentioned, and you’re so eager to ascribe the worst possible motivations and interpret things in a negative light, or accuse me of lying even if it’s plainly obvious that I’m telling the truth. Like you’re just eager to jump on any mistake I make and point it out to humiliate me and cast me as a villain, and then justify yourself by claiming that you’re only being objective or just stating the facts, when you know very well that you’re presenting those facts selectively and out of context. And I know that you only act this way because it’s me, because if someone else did or said exactly the same thing you wouldn’t respond like that. I feel like you’ve been posting this type of shit with the intention of taunting me, like the stuff about it being the tip of the iceberg on this one and wanting to avoid women who are hopelessly mentally ill or whatever else. And I understand that I’ve wronged you and you have reasons to be frustrated, and I really am sorry, but I feel like you adopted this attitude of extreme hostility towards me even before I had really done anything wrong, like your immediate response to me attempting to communicate with you was just unmitigated rage. All I want is to be good enough for you to care about me and not be angry with me and want to communicate with me but nothing I do will ever be enough.
It’s like you hate me for being this way without acknowledging that your actions played a role in making me this way. The majority of it is my fault, and some of it is situational or circumstantial, but if you’re honest with yourself you know that you bear some responsibility.
>>31133596WHERES MY MONEY?! IF YOU AREN'T GOING TO GIVE ME MY GODDAMN MONEY FOR MY INVENTIONS WHY AREN'T YOU ARRESTING THESE PSYCHOPATHS LIKE CHRISSY?
The essential truth, I think, is that you want to punish me. If you could ease my pain by something as simple as pressing a button, say, you would not do it, because you feel that it shouldn’t be your responsibility and you think that I deserve to suffer. You yourself said it: “Why give her what she wants?” You’ve been actively doing things like this most recent project out of spite, or “to prove a point,” because it amuses you to mock me and salt the wound. And everything I’ve written here, all of the fucked up insane things that I’ve done, as much as I’ve cried, so desperate to make you finally see, to finally reach you, has been for nothing. There is nothing that I can say to make you understand. It’s as though we speak two different languages. I try everything to make you hear me; you can’t. Nothing I can say will ever resonate with you emotionally. Nothing I can say will ever reach you. It just rinses off of you like water. If anything, you find it tedious. You aren’t incapable of empathy in general; you’re just incapable of feeling any empathy towards me specifically, and you felt that way long before I had ever wronged you or deceived you. Just a total absence of feeling or regard. I don’t know why. It isn’t even really your fault.
The essential problem isn’t my personality; my personality being the core of who I am, external to any symptoms of mental illness, or who I was in essence before this experience warped me beyond all recognition. The way that I look is what makes everything about me, including my personality, repulsive to you. That is so painful that I cannot even begin to process it, and it is something that I have no control over. I am incapable of feeling anything towards my own body but hatred and visceral disgust. This is not something that can be worked through or overcome with time. It’s unfixable. I deeply hate myself, and always will. I can’t even blame you for feeling that way; you can’t help how you feel.
L you are the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen
I want to feel your nose on my clit while you eat me out. God help me I’m in love
I quit my wagie job almost two months ago. I wanted to my vent to my boss about all the issues I had with the job that I only confided with the assistant manager, but she was away in a meeting that day. I said fuck it, and just left my resignation letter with the assistant manager. But to this day, I still feel regret for not getting my issues directly off my chest.How do I get over this?
>>31148138no taint no life
Girlfriend of 7 years just picked up the last of her shit from mine. My heart hasn't stopped aching, I was going to marry her fuck I'm so fucking lonely why the fuck did she dump me and leave why
you were the best person i ever met. still miss you even now
>>31148985SEVEN years? Serves you right
>>31147994If that's who I think it is tell me in dm's so I can go away and be by myself.
I'm so damn ugly, I can't have any personality, I can act cute or tough because my appearance invalidates everything I do, I'd look weird. Society doesn't like ugly people, we're the outcast, people disregard everything we say. I wish I wasn't born this way, I'm ugly ugly ugly ugly ugly ugly I'm tired of being so ugly, I hate everything about myself. Why was I born this way
>>31149016You can always be the comic relief character
Did I learn my lesson? Hell no
the internet IS real life
>>31149024Yeah but that won't take me far, I'll still be feeling miserable, plus I'm an introvert so I rarely talk, I look weird and awkward because I'm a quiet ugly guy, if I was attractive people would talk to me because they would see me as an interesting person or something idk
>leave 4chan for six months >develop a substance abuse problem >life significantly and i mean SIGNIFICANTLY improvesi unironically advise everyone here to do the same
My roommate/flatmate has gone off the fucking deep end.She's begun accusing me of threatening her and damaging the apartment. I assume it isn't long before she accuses me of assault.I went to the local police dept and talked to them about an hour ago. They said just avoid her for two months until the lease is up.How boned am I?
>>31149063You are telling people to become alcoholic? Never have i heard auch short sighted advice.
>>31149083What did you do? Nobody starts accusing people out of the blue. You sound nuts.
i'm not sorry. fuck off
Fight the future
A heterosexual relationship is inherently supreme when it comes to storytelling. It's the ying and yang. I've attempted to give gay and lesbian love stories a chance, but all that seems to do is reinforce this fact. I'm not even homophobic, my best friend is an alphabet person who loves this kind of stuff and accepts that I don't. There's a reason romantic tales have dominated fiction for generations, I'm sick of deconstruction and subversion. A good story can be full of cliches if it is carried by its characters. Love is simply beauty crystallised.
>>31149625If you don’t believe men and women embody both embody yin and yang principles, you are not as open minded as you think. If you replaced the male figure in any of your favorite romances with a butch lesbian, does it fall apart in your eyes?
>>31149625watch banana fish
Okay, I hate this.I had a dream where I slept with my sister. I hate this. What the fuck and why? Am I that lonely now?
>>31147994but what if I just want you to myself
>>31149625yuri on ice is also pretty good
>>31149700But I'm emotionally and physically exploitable now :<
>>31149763well quit being so far away then
>>31148988Same, I think about you every day. No woman has changed my life the way you have, tomorrow I'll make you mine.
>>31149799um, I don't have a car still.
Ever since I started drinking this supplement I've become excessively horny... God help me I'm on my 10th nut today and I can't stop, I need to rape someone soon or I'm going to dieAll I wanted was to work out FUUUUUUUCK I need to get off again
>>31149920What is it? I might need something in it because of my post gastric injury problems. Just trying to figure out the more eclectic parts I have to change in my diet now.
>>31149943I make a big smoothie, a hypercaloric with 25 vitamins and creatine in it 100g per 500 ml, then I add 100 ml of coffee, a spoonful of honey, blend a few clovers of garlic to put in it, then top off with cold orange juice, sometimes I down it with 200mg of pure caffeine in a pill, my diet mainly consists of red meat and vegetables, I work out almost every day.It activates the fuck out of me
>>31149912that's an issue, but not having you around is also an issue
>>31149969>>31149943I also eat all the bone marrow, garlic skins, drink orange tea from the peels, stuff like that.
>>31149943Also drink a fuckton of water
My dad complimented me and on how well I've been getting along with my sister. Feels kinda sad because we only "get along" because I have implemented something like grey rock. I don't react to her strong opinions on things and don't discuss anything truly important (to me) with her. After our last argument where the police almost got called I was just like "That's it! I'm not talking about anything important with you because you can't handle it. You can't stay civil." We lightly discuss the more superficial matters in life and that's pretty much it. If she has a strong opinion about something I just say "Yeah" and leave the room. She's pretty much the reason I won't discuss politics, economics, sociology, religion, or anything "top-down" with a woman. That's how we have managed to get along.
>>31147966Nta but interesting theory. I shall think the same
>>31149969>>31149980Ah! Thanks anon! I probably need some more creatinine these days. Had to avoid it for a long time as my kidney's were working really hard due to all the physical stress complications.Thanks for helping remind me about that anon! I really appreciate it.
>>31150131Never forget to drink more water, that's the important part to not fuck up your organs
>>31149978> but not having you around is also an issueSame. I can't be alone anymore.
>>31150138Already am but thanks for the helpful reminder. Lot of people forget that basic one it seems.
Still having trouble getting over a former roommate and fake friend slightly bullying me about five years ago over the dumbest imaginable reason. It didn't help that I was going through hell on earth in that big city and the stress that came with it. Or the fact that he was alpha enough to date slender women, which is something I never could manage to do my entire life, and it just felt like he was rubbing his alphaness in my face the very second I told him that I had had enough of living in that city, couldn't take the stress and depression anymore and was moving back home, or that I did him so many favors while I had lived there with him. So much pain and resentment to process
>>31150153Why does distance have to be a thing, you should just be here right now
>>31150227But I can't.
>>31150252:(
>>31150252Just put out already, the guy wants your holes
You do not need to tell me that you aren’t sorry. I already know that you aren’t sorry. I hope that you will someday see things differently, but realistically I have no expectation that you’ll ever be sorry. You decided early on that you bear zero responsibility and that nothing you could’ve done would’ve changed anything, and I don’t think you will ever even consider the fact that you might be wrong and that your actions may have contributed to the dynamic that developed. You will never acknowledge the fact that you played a role in this, as you simply do not want to and feel that you should not have to, because to do so would inconvenience you and make you uncomfortable. It is easier for you to react with reflexive anger and hostility than to even attempt to empathise and see things from my point of view.“Slights (in your eyes)” perfectly encapsulates your perspective on this. You will never admit that your initial response to my attempt to communicate with you was unnecessarily cruel and intimidating, and that your reaction stemmed more from your own paranoia and repressed rage than from a reasonable reaction to anything that I had done. Instead, you prefer to characterise everything I feel as inherently distorted and unreasonable, because (in your mind) that absolves you of all responsibility. You said that “there’s no way to nullify the consequences of something by hiding behind intention.” That principle applies to you in exactly the same way that it applies to me. You claimed that you were not being intentionally cruel in what you said and that you simply avoided being kind, but that’s just equivocation. Avoiding kindness when dealing with someone else’s vulnerable emotions is fundamentally cruel. I’m not even angry at you, because you can’t help being the way that you are, and I have no expectation that saying this will have any impact on your way of thinking. I’m just trying to work through my feelings about it.
I hate this place so much. What i actually want is people irl that i can spend my days with that care about the same things i care and are just as passionate about them. But all the people i know do not give a shit and tell me to not get riled up over things i care about. They gaslight me or tell me to stop caring. But i can not and i do not want to. And i also do not just want to keep it to myself. I hate it here so much.
>>31150437okay Taylor calm down
>>31150484Never in my life have i felt so insulted. Delete.
>>31150567Bye felicia
How do i learn to work trough my emotions by doing chores?
>>31150594Pulling out weeds in your front and back yard. Washing dishes, sweeping, moping your floors.
>>31150659Yeah yeah i get that. And i do that. But it does not help. I am just as mad, sad, hopeless and frustrated after.
>>31150437Why do you have to talk to anyone? I don't see how "I hang out with people I hate because I don't have anyone" is even a thing. It makes no sense to me. It's completely baffling. Also what if the things you care about are bullshit? If one person tells you this it can be said that they're an asshole. If two people tell you this, maybe you have a couple of assholes. If everyone is telling you to stop getting so riled up about things (cause) and you find that you are isolated in your life (effect), maybe you should take their advice and stop getting riled up about bullshit. Why are you willing to go down with the ship of whatever bullshit (that you probably talk about unnecessarily) instead of just reflecting and changing?
>>31150797>Why do you have to talk to anyone?Because that is the only way i can work trough my emotions. >I don't see how "I hang out with people I hate because I don't have anyone" is even a thing. It makes no sense to me. It's completely baffling. I isolate myself as much as possible but sometimes i have to go to family gatherings and to work. I hate it a lot. >Also what if the things you care about are bullshit? If one person tells you this it can be said that they're an asshole. If two people tell you this, maybe you have a couple of assholes. If everyone is telling you to stop getting so riled up about things (cause)I get riled up about cruelty in the world. Trigger topics are things like human trafficking or poverty. >and you find that you are isolated in your life (effect), maybe you should take their advice and stop getting riled up about bullshit. I can not really decide what gets me emotional. I can decide to not share it with anyone. Which is what i have been doing for the last decade. But whenever i even as much as say one sentence, people lose it. >Why are you willing to go down with the ship of whatever bullshit (that you probably talk about unnecessarily) instead of just reflecting and changing?I am constantly reflecting and changing but for some reason that is not appreciated at all. The people around me only care if it concerns then personally, so as long as none of us gets kidnapped, they do not give a shit about what happens to others. And i get it, there is nothing one person can do and talking about it does not do anything. But how is it possible that people can be aware of the cruelty in this world and not even want to talk about it and understand why this happens and what humanity could do to make it happen a bit less in the future? It baffles my mind. But yeah. I see that it is no different here. Whenever i talk about it people tell me to suck it up and not bother then with my negativity. I just do not know how to deal with it.
>>31150853Mind you, i never talk about this at work. And i maybe dare to say one thing to my mom once a year when she is trying to connect with me because she sees that i am isolating myself.
i got the juice
Nice job Andrew. Is there anything else you would like to ruin?
Fuck Andrew. Literally every person male or female named Andrew is a cunt
would you kindly
>>31144890Did I fuck up here?
>>31151127Not yet but you have to keep going now.
Please don’t give context
i need some real advice. I've loved a girl for years and we broke up almost a year and half ago. im over it and it doesn't cross my mind that much only once a week or smth nothing important. There's a girl in my buddies college class and she saw me every once and then she started talking about me more and more that's like a year ago and since then she's trying so by telling the ones close to her how pretty iam, mimicking the way i react to things talk. and pretty much yapping about me and what im up to and telling them to link her up with me. meanwhile all we have between us is just a morning hello. Now here comes the struggle, I fuckin wanna get into a relationship with her she's like the prettiest and kindest girl in the college and everyone else has either confessed for her to her friends or they just have a crush on her. i want to get into a relationship but my fuckin situation doesn't let me. im currently lost i wanna hit the gym much more make money to spend with her snd just overall be steady. i dont want her to lose interest in me till i make myself perfect what can i do anons help a young brother out. i wanna keep her mine tell i make myself perfect for the time being.
>>31151127Too many words. Use chat gpt to condemse your words. Send pictures instead. Women don't think in symbols, they think in images and smells and sounds. They're like dogs. In a good way, though. I love dogs.
I'm gross. I'm not smart, I'm not kind, I'm not reasonable or courteous. I'm gross.
To present myself as a peer or equal in any context, is that not laughable? Is that not aggrivating?
>>31151742
I always see hourly workers complaining because no one appreciates them. So lately I have been trying to be extra appreciative. I feel like a total faggot and as far as I can tell it hasn't really been appreciated
I can't do it /adv/, I can't fucking do it, I thought I was stronger but the horny caught up with me and I bought sex toys. I would kill for some ass right now, I would rape the first creature that got in front of me, male female or in between, I don't care anymore, I am salivating at the thought of pushing someone down and raping them like they're a walking cum dump fuckdoll for me to abuse.I've lost count of how many times I came today, wtf is happening to me...
I could definitely afford to feel a lot worse right now
I don’t think I’ve hugged anyone who isn’t a family member this year
>>31152705Same, I wish I wasn't alone
Dad's condition got worse. A lot worse. Just a week ago I was talking with him, watching him do well in physical therapy, and planning on what movies we were gonna watch when he got out.Then, a couple of days ago I got a call that his speech was failing. I went to go see him, but by the time I got there he was only able to move his hand a little. He was at a point where he was having a mini-stroke about once every two hours.My dad was always such an outspoken asshole. It was hard seeing him like that. Completely helpless and struggling to breathe. 50 years of smoking and really poor diet basically did so much damage to his veins that the doctors couldn't do anything for him. They tried to do a nuero-clot surgery, but the cath required to clear out his arteries wasn't able to get in there with all the blockages. My dad was a small guy, and he looked physically fit for his age, but he was lazy, ate cheeseburgers for just about every meal, and smoked three packs of cigarettes a day. I love my dad, and I tried and tried to get him to change his dumb habits over the years, but he was stubborn.With what little motion he had, he wrote "ThiiS BaD" on a piece of paper and he kept pointing to it over and over. We both managed to stay strong and composed even in the last time I hugged him. But we both started crying when I walked out the door. Today he's completely unconscious, and will be for the rest of his life. I signed the DNR request, because I know he wouldn't want to be a vegetable in a chair.The last two things my dad said to me were "Behave yourself and be good" and "You're gonna be okay."Love you dad. (Pic Related. He fuckin' loved Conan.)
She honestly thought I was 25; i'm 35. I tend to forget I've always looked younger than I actually am as an adult. Of course that used to make me mad but as it kept being the case as I aged it started to charm me. When people legitimately do that now I feel flattered enough I even get tingly sensations like I'm an anxious teenager again lol. I'm easily flattered about my appearance and that it can even make me blush and stutter when you purposely keep doing it. That's what I get for having self-esteem and anxiety issues when I was younger. Never could learn to take a compliment about my appearance without getting shy and denying it.
I’m so fucking alone. Sat on the train today for an hour there was a couple same age as me right in front of me kissing and cuddling the whole journey they were so in love. I was happy for them but at the same time if I had a gun I would’ve killed my self right there and then. I know I’ll never have that what’s the point
>>31153111
>>31153137When did I say they shouldn’t be happy?
>>31135170>He doesn't know
Damn, I don't even want to die anymore. WAGMI.
>>31147820Literal retard speaking here, get back to plebbit
It's embarrassing having anger issues when you're five foot two. Something as mildly frustrating as not being able to fix a broken shoe and it's making me suicidal from how angry I am. I want to carpet bomb something. Anyone attempting to speak to me Is making me go deeper into an autistic rage. I just cry instead but I'm thinking nothing but violent thoughts and my blood pressure is making me dizzy. I'm embarrassed.
>>31153069you know how there's such a thing as humble bragging? you're shy bragging
>>31151621Just went on a date with her and fucked it up but I don’t know what I did wrong. The date didn’t even last an hour and she unfollowed me on Snapchat despite saying she had fun.
>>31153466Nah, the additional notions of how I can be flattered get to me. I wanted to develop past that, and did for many aspects of flattery and basic social anxiety, but as soon as it's a compliment based on my physical appearance I just turn into a dork.
poopoo peepee
The most beautiful woman I ever met is a fucking dyke
Why do the little fuckers insist on using Rebookiestan’s face over four years later? She’s still married.Also: little fuckers are pretending to be Kiernan Shipka now.
>>31153470Don't beat yourself up for it, a lot of women are like that. They pretend that everything is fine and then they just quietly jump off.
>>31153572>posts le shy boi image>hehe I'm shy..
You ever notice that Jawas say, “Houdini!” ?Makes you think!
>>31133596Oneitis stuff is gay and cringe but I saw her again and all that flows through my mind is the love I had for her, how much I wanted to marry her, how we told each other we were soul mates, how my heart aches knowing I no longer have her. Anons... I don't think I can love another woman the way I loved her. I want her back so badly, no one I've met even comes close.
>>31153683Vile. You are actually subhuman.
>>31153686Do you think that I could get biologists to classify me as a new subspecies?
>>31153675>that feel when your oneitis is a coworker
I just want to talk to her like before
>just make a post in gioyc on /adv>come to check my post>thread deleted>check history>thread 404>this thread exists with 200+ postswhat the fuck happened with time
That's low
>>31153907what is?
Blarg
>>31133596I want to fuck my wife's brains out when she comes out the shower I haven't had sex in a full fucking week fuck me why did I have to end up a horny fuck ffs
I thought therapy this morning would make me feel better but everything feels worse and my thoughts have been racing all day. My brother was driving through on his way home for the summer so he stopped to visit me for a few hours this evening and we went out for dinner but I felt so sick with anxiety that I couldn’t eat anything and could barely even focus on what he was saying. I thought I was feeling a bit better and more clear headed over the past few days but suddenly everything is unbearable again I’m sorry
all my family members who are obligated to care about me are noticeably drained just from being around me. just existing makes their lives worse. anyone who tries to be closer than just an acquaintance to me always regrets it. i have tried over a decade of therapy and dozens of different medication combos to become a more tolerable person. none of it works. So... like, actually, why do i have to stay alive again? I'm being dead serious. I don't understand the logic here. Why do i have to?
It’s petty, but I’m very glad to see you’re not doing well mentally. You deserve it after treating me like shit for months at a time then saying that terrible shit about me publicly and blowing up when I had a slight response. This is what you get when you just bottle emotions up, you get this stressed. I don’t think you will ever get how to interact with people. Blame autism all you want, you’re just a nasty person who lashes out and won’t be happy. And I’m glad! Enjoy being alone forever. I got friends here who like me and want to see me. I don’t need to chase your approval anymore.
The guy I like has a girlfriend, what do I do? I don't want to intentionally wreck their relationship or anything but how to do I get closer to him incase they do breakup?
New ability unlocked: spiraling into a shitty mood and depressive feelings whenever I have a good interaction with an attractive woman
>never had any real friends, ever>struggle to form any type of non romantic relationship and that's only due to dating apps making guessing if someone likes you extremely clear>take Aspie quiz>97% chance you are high functioning autisttime to bring this up in this weeks session haha
i'm 38 and i can't remember a time in my life when i was stable or happy and I don't know if it's BPD or BP-2 or something but all I've done is rack up debt, burden my family and throughout it all, suffered. I don't want to fix this life, I don't want to turn it around, I'm fucking done trying, if every fucking try is going to result in the same deadend or worse. fuck, so angry with myself for not being selfish when i was younger and healthier.
my family made me an alcoholic. i dont even blame them but its 100% their fault and i think they know it
Why do I find romance so repulsive? I don't understand why I have such a visceral feeling of disgust for it, rationally I don't see anything wrong with it but I may come across someone explaining the "sweet" closeness and intimacy and romantic love between them and I literally cringe irl. In a way I feel very alone being single forever, but why do I even feel alone if I'm so grossed out by the alternative? I really don't understand.
I would like to empty my balls down Karolina Protsenko’s throat.
>>31152835Why did you leave anon? Did you know he was dying? Did you know that would be your last goodbye? Not trying to make you feel bad, I just want to know. One of my parents is approaching death as well.
>>31154052When you’re in love your body makes a bunch of hormones that make all the gay shit you do make sense. As an outside observer who isn’t feeling those things it seems cringe
A feral cat had a go at me yesterday and I’ve been pondering whether I should kill it. I think little dude is just horny but I don’t get attacked/charged by animals often and the audacity of it just kinda spun me a bit
>>31148347yep i am aware you can still talk first for once
>>31154111I guess I'm not capable of experiencing romantic love? I have never in my life felt like doing that type of shit.
>>31154137You aren’t him
>>31148347A resolution is all that is wanted, not assignment of blame. It's not possible to not react at the outcome, even still fixing it is more important.
>>31154220What kind of resolution are you talking about?
Every day sucks without you but I have no choice but to stay away. That sick thing continues to inhabit your body and hurt me every time I get close. Please come back, please take your body back and let's be in love like we should. I wait and watch with my shovel in hand to dig you up from the dirt and bring you back to life. I need you baby. Come back to life please Do you hear me knocking on the lid of your casket?
Any advice for living in a student residence when I am going to be probably twice their age? I got an opportunity to go back to school to get some paid qualifications for my job, but my only options through my company are student housing, and they're all three or four bedrooms. I am 34 years old, I doubt any of these kids are going to want to live with me, but I also don't want to ruin anybody's potential college life if they have to live with an old man.
How am I supposed to resolve anything if you won’t even communicate with me
I'm not jinxing my progress, no way, but I will say, I am glad you're well the fuck off my way as of this moment.Fuck it feels good to be free.
>>31153319It doesn't exist. Look it up and yes, you are a retarded. >>31147968You would if you wouldn't get in trouble for it?
>>31148164Actually he really does, he tells me all the time. Just because you're unloved, doesn't mean everyone is. I mean, what's to love about you? You're ugly, cruel, stupid and can't even live properly or take care of a kid. You're fucked.
>>31154004Easy, you should be a good friend and support them both while you open yourself to a new person to come up, if things go south and you are a good friend, in the right time and you'll get your shot, but don't go around waiting for this, focus on moving forward on your own, finding new people and opening yourself to possibilities.
>>31133596Almost 30, poor, virgin, not homeless luckily, and not an incel (kinda was one in my early 20s), unemployed, in debt, trying to finish degree. Mental health is at an all time low. I feel like my life passed me by. I had fantasies that i would figure my life out by now, but i didn't. I feel like it's over for me. I have so much anxiety and i don't know how to rectify it. The only thing keeping me alive is, ironically, fear and my family. Death seems inevitable honestly. I fantasize about having a family, but to be honest it seems like a monumental task. I've got so many issues to work on before then. I don't think i'm gonna make it.
What am I supposed to do to fix things? Please don’t do this to me
>>31154419it's never too late
>>31154443How are we supposed to know what the fuck you're even talking about. Fix what?
>>31154458I don’t know???? Like what does “fixing it is more important” mean, that’s what I want to know???
>>31154464then figure it the fuck out
>>31154469How am I supposed to figure it out if no one will tell me anything and they’re just trying to make me crazy by being cryptic??? Leave me alone i can’t talk to you
>>31154474What do you want to know?
>>31154479What this means>>31154220
You disgust me
>>31154516Why are you doing this????? Why are you doing this please why would you even do this
>>31154516Why would you say that please tell me why you would say that?????? Please I can’t why would you say that please you’re just trying to make me crazy why would you do this?????
>>31154516Just tell me if you’re him please just tell me I. Can’t why would you do this???,,
>>31154519>>31154525>>31154531I'm not whoever you think I am
Myself and many of my team members have been working 12 hour days lately. I'm absolutely emotionally and intellectually drained at the end of each day, while they seem to be able to keep coming back for more. How do they do it? Am I just a pussy? It's not like I'm an oil rig worker or farmer, I just have a desk job, but I don't know why I get so mentally exhausted to the point that I can barely type at the end of each day. I just want to succeed in my career, it's the only thing I have left.
>>31154559unironically, desk job will drain me nore than labor jobs
>>31154531Deep breaths! Life could be worse, you could be that smelly homeless whore, Cheswick.
Was looking at this girl's instagram cause she was pretty cute, start thinking immoral thoughts. Keep checking back on her for about a week.Today she uploaded a story that she was barely turning 15. Instant regret, I feel fucking sick. Man what the fuck is wrong with me.
The more I try to improve my life the less happy I am. The more every set back hurts. I’m a born and bred loser. I don’t even know I bother. I could be perfect and still no one would want me. For fucks sake my own family sure as hell doesn’t. Oh we’re so proud you went from being a burn out loser to being a loser in college, but hey great school. Fucking smart move on my part. Worked my way up to making more than the median household income in my area. Pissed all away because I was going to finish what I started. Fucked myself financially. Thank god I look young but fuck I hate the kids. Every day it just reminds me of how much of a fuck up I am. How I could have done it all earlier and stood a chance. So many wasted years.Why, why, just fucking why did I have to be born autistic. To find out this late, like no fucking wonder. Some people have it so much worse. Holy fuck I just want to be normal, like everyone else. My whole damn life. Look normal but something the other kids picked up on that I was different. Drunk ass dad and bpd mom sure didn’t help.
>>31154516why
>>31154679Get a grip
>>31133596My mother is getting up there in age and I really don't want her to die. I dread the day that happens. I hope she lives many more years.
There's this guy I'm interested in, but he is taken. He has given me signs that heäs interested in me. I don't know how to broach the subject is the relationship open or something.
I hope you've read my messages and liked them, and I look forward to sending you more.
My hair is thinning should I commit
Worried that I can't function outside of a BDSM relationship. As a "slave" I can clean my room daily, take 5 minute cold showers, study daily, and get to bed strictly on time. When I'm normal, I get too loose and sloppy. But BDSM isn't Christian, so I have to stop it.
>>31154559Because it fuels them, whilst it drains you. Because for them it pays off, whilst for you it likely does not. To them, life is worth living because it is fun and the future looks bright. To you it is a burden and the future looks bleak at best. To to them work is something that validates them, to you it is something that humiliates you. You dread that you have to do this just to get some acknowledgment and a chance at making it some day, fully aware that there is no guarantee your hard work and long hours will ever actually pay off. You have zoomed out too far and have become disillusioned.
>>31154819Wdym? Rigid control and slave like obedience is the definition of Christianity. You just swap some mediocre lanklet ((master)) out for god. He is your daddy now. Now go be a good nun and stick to the unseasoned porridge and daily prayers.
We gotta do something about the copier. It takes forever to scan and when it's halfway done you have to hit the continue button even though the document isn't double sided. It's annoying.
You know the rules and so do I
Do you think Rick Astley had groupies in his era? It sounds dumb to think about I know but
he's a moron a retard and a loser, die little nigga die
>>31133596The world has the knack of splitting the stage, so the one-guy-everyone-hates-upon has to deliver his lines to both audiences. The bar crowd and the temperance union, the right-to-lifers and the it's-my-choicers, all at once. It made sense to do it to publicly funded institution CEOs, because of disclosure rights, but a comedian is just trying to turn a buck, or save his own neck.
>>31155006Woah. shove me in the shallow water before I get too deep
little green men
The men from space.
that's ace
>>31134550>life is very shortnigga, its the longest thing we'll be doing
>>31155147that's a new perspective I never thought about
>>31153631I wish anime had better male emotional stereotype reactions, don't you? Less shy boys and more like, I dunno, doofy Takeo in love
Oh good god no
Being a woman is an exclusive club and you can't just join it because you want to, no more than you can become a cat because you want to. Even if 8 billion people agreed with you that you are a cat and used feline terms to describe your life the unmovable mountain of truth declares loudly that you are not a cat
FsghhhffjjbfddchzDghfjkfchkd.
Whichyphus?Thisyphus.
I have a four page paper due at midnight. I've done all the research, so it shouldn't take long. Can't be bothered. I recorded a presentation, went a minute over. Fuck it, just gimmie a B on it. I'll get the paper in whenever. Maybe it'll be on time. Fuck it.
Masturbation fuels me.
地獄?天国?あほです
Verlargshternen
You ever been to Toys R Us?
You ever been to Shakeys?
You ever seen a grown man naked?
can't escape the AGP allegations i am a pure narcissist the only woman o ever dream of having sex with is still me holy shit.
Woman invited me to an outing, I hate being out in public so I did not say yes (did not give her an answer really)I could not stop thinking about it and her since then, and brought it up today saying I would like to goShe looked really happy. She said she wants to get a big group of people to go do something now I regret it
>>31157791No.
>>31154091>Why did you leave anon?I'd been there for quite some time, just kind of sitting with him. There became a point where eventually I would have to leave and everything we could say or wanted to say had already been done. He needed to rest, and I had a long drive ahead of me.>Did you know he was dying?Before the past couple of weeks, no. Just two weeks ago he had a stroke, and was recovering. Like, he was able to get up and do things for himself, watch movies, get around. At first his physical therapists thought he was doing great. They thought he was going to be completely rehabilitated and be back to his old self. Then each day his speech became slurred. He became tired more easily. And then finally, They called me saying he couldn't talk at all. He could hear me fine and understand fine.Did you know that would be your last goodbye?I didn't until the moment it happened. It's like it all sank in just at once. We were sitting there talking, and then as I was leaving he motioned and mouthed "You're gonna be okay" and that when we both started crying.He's still completely unconscious. They gave him a morphine drip in combination with some sleep medication so that he's not in pain. We've all went and had our last words with him. I asked "Is there anything you need me to do as your last active will? Is there anyone you need to contact or say anything to?" He just sat and thought for a moment, then looked at me and shook his head.All day at work, I walked around like I was in a fog. Life doesn't feel real. Like, right now I'm typing on a keyboard but it just feels like nothing. I'm writing these words to you yet it just feels like a dream.
Game over, man. Game over!
You lied. You act like you didn’t, but you did. I guess it’s on me for not going back so you wouldn’t be able to correct the record, but as it is I don’t really fucking care.You’re a shallow, boring, uninteresting piece of shit lusting after a married man while abusing the trust of your friends and then wondering why you’re on the verge of alcoholism when all you do is use drugs to cope for your complete lack of a personality.You’re uptight, pushy, hypocritical, judgmental, and a complete ass. You weren’t even born in this country yet you act worse than I do for claim to be different, meanwhile you burn money like a white whore and cry and complain when others tell you to stop.Damn I guess I really did just need to externalize it all. I feel loads better, and I don’t actually disagree with much of what I’ve said here. Why the fuck was I getting so hung up on you damn.
Huh. Now that the rush of it is over, I thought it'd be more meaningful. I wanted closure for so long and I got it, and I feel fine, or just nothing. I feel empty, but not in a "Something is missing" anymore, more like a "Oh, so that's all there is to this?"I really thought I felt something for you. Maybe its the fact you went back with him. Maybe its the fact that I can actually talk to you now and not with the version of you I made up in my head. But I kinda feel just slightly happy for you now. Its a weird feeling. Like it sort of bothers me that there's nothing to complain about now besides myself. But I also feel like I could actually be or do anything now. I feel like an white sheet of paper or an empty jar or whatever.To whoever is reading this I know this reads like nonsense, but I guess my head is just empty now. I guess I'll find another woman to obsess over for 8 years.
I hate you
Todays brunch feeding of the creature was:I >half an apple>one toast with butter and honey>ginger broth with enoki mushrooms Luch feeding will be:>tarte flambée with bacon and thymeDinner feeding is not decided yet.
Sometimes I hate being the bigger person. Sometimes I just wanna cave someone's head in when they're being harsh towards me or anyone I care about because they have an inferiority complex.
>>31166238U mad we told you your muscles do mot make you hot? Called it with the supreme gentleman allegations. Thanks for proving my point.
I'm home alone for the next two days. I haven't been truly home alone for more than a couple of hours for nearly six years. It's strange, I'm ultimately doing the exact same things I always do even when I'm not alone yet for some reason it feels so much more liberating. Hell, if you ask me I feel a tiny bit sharper and more true to myself. Instead of quietly cracking one off to incredibly degenerate porn and feeling like garbage afterwards, I just had a cheeky morning wank to some cosplay tart photo sets and I feel better for it like any self-respecting bachelor should. I had the same breakfast as always, but it tasted nicer. I've been off from work this entire week, but this is the first time where I haven't just been staring at the clock with no desire to do anything in a withdrawn rut. I'm even standing straighter when I'm walking around the house. What's the psychology here? Is this the real me that's been hiding away all this time? They say that the true test of a man's character is what he does when no one is watching. This time for once truly no one is watching, yet somehow I feel a bit less scummy than usual. I'm gonna wash the dishes soon, looking forward to a mixtape of 70s British rock and anime OPs whilst ignoring the clock all day. Maybe some surface cleaning too, they're covered in dust. And then? Age of Steam baby!
I just want to be your friendI don’t know why you’re mad at me
Dear dumb bitchAll you do is argue about the most mundane of things so you feel better about cheating on me and anytime I do something with other people or the smallest of things you freak out and disappear to do god knows what. Fuck you I'm done go live life being miserable because its a choice you keep on making. Fucking hell I hate people that are pussies that need cope anytime their comfort zone gets broken. You are a disgusting narcissistic piece of shit that feels entitled to everything. The problems you face on a daily basis are nothing yet you act as if its the end of the fucking world. How fucking hard is it for people to be grateful about what they fucking have. Swear to god its all these NPD cunts being forever entitled to everything and having mental breakdown whenever they cant practice gratitude about what they have.YOU DONT WANT ME OR A PARTNER YOU WANT A PERFECT ROBOT TO READ YOUR MIND AND GOD FORBID THEY SAY NO OR DO ANYTHING THAT DOESNT MATCH WHAT HAPPENS IN YOUR BRAIN. No wonder you only date man children because you are a fucking toddler yourself 0 self control. Fuck you first world people and your first world problems living in the comfort of your house meanwhile someone hasn't eaten in over a week.
I'm fucking Batman
The thing is, after 2 days of arguments. No one in this house even asked what was wrong, it was more about what I hadn't done for everyone else. I'm almost 34, and over the last couple of days it's really been hard on me mentally to be that age and have fucking nothing. It just seems my life has revolved around my parents and I've had little time to worry about myself and my wants. It's not that I don't want to help out, the fact is I should be doing things in my own home at this age, having my own life and things. It kind of hurts to realize your value means nothing aside from what you've done for others in this house, and if you do, it still means nothing and you ge told that you don't do anything and you can't get anything, sometimes using your problems as a lure to get you to do something. That's the problem, I've done enough, and I get called "entitled" because I'm tired of living like this and having everything revolve around others when I've just wanted to worry about myself and I feel like that's something that should have never been taken away from me. YOU DON'T HELP OUT, YOU DON'T DO THIS, and I'm like "I have for years, this shit is depressing as shit and all I wanted was for you to fuck off".
I have no car, no money, no education, no place of my own, no social life, etc, it's all the same things I complain about that I feel that I should be entitled to, and I'm entitled to worry about myself, this is my life. And I'm tired of putting others before myself and I've been doing this since I was a kid. It needs to come to an end, but fuck, I didn't know I'd be almost half way to 40. I'm really tired of hearing that "entitled" bullshit, yeah, I am. And I'm entitled to my time and life here, something went wrong down the line and I can't help but look at them as the biggest cause. Them not letting me get that car(and everything that happened in Richmond with them) is a perfect example of my relationship with them and the shit they pulled anytime I was moving forward. I've been trying to get away from my parents my whole life because at a young age I realized if I didn't, they'd fuck my shit up bad..Welp, look what happened, the biggest thing I feared. I fucked up too, but there was many times I tried getting back on my feet and they put a barrier right in my way. I'm going to live in regret for the rest of my life I didn't do more to get away from them, and keep them away. Looking back that moment in Richmond where I should have done something was such a significant and serious moment where I could have stopped everything and changed my life, just one phone call..I didn't do it. I didn't fucking do it.
>>31166589Quick factiod, I've called the suicide hotline 9 times since I've been here. I've never called that hotline, ever. We're talking about the people that literally called me a month after moving out and were literally yelling about me not doing the dishes before I left. YOU CAN'T DO ANYTHING FOR US, WHAT IS A GIFT YOU'VE EVER GAVE THIS FAMILY, and I'm sitting there on the phone like "What the fuck?". The gift thing is weird, they used to say that a lot, it's like I'm not buying you a fucking gift when you've basically kept chains on me my whole life. I owe you nothing, fucking gift..The god damn audacity, and sometimes in arguments years back they'd run to the bathroom and fake gag, it was the strangest thing. Like I'm pissed they're fucking my shit up and not letting me do anything for myself, and they're in the bathroom, grown ass adults, fake gagging instead of admitting that they're playing games with you and your life instead of just letting you go. I remember them doing that one time I found a car I wanted to buy, they just fucking lost their shit, screaming, yelling, fake crying, fake gagging, going to beat my ass. Oh yeah, totally normal shit and behavior from grown people towards their kid who'd just had enough with their shit.
>>31166591Why is the car thing such a big deal? Because if I got a car, they'd lose control and that dictation. I could leave, I could go anywhere, do anything. They were always in the way, and if I wanted to do it on my own, I was met with problems and everything else. One time being told I'd get my ass beat if I "came home with that car"..In retrospect, I should have got the car, taken the ass whooping, and then called the cops afterwards. If I bought something legally, they'd have no power over it anyway, but hindsight is always 20/20 and fear was/is one of the biggest ways they can control me. Especially fear of reltaliation from my mother, the one who literally told me that she was going to get my lease cancelled which made me laugh because there's no legal way she could have.
>>31166490I fucking wish.
>>31166587I mean, all THEY wanted was for you to fuck off. Wo do that. It is entitled to stay past your welcome in your parents house. That was ten years ago anon.
>>31166627It's the other way around, trust me.
>>31166633How so?
>>31166638Just have this, my mom basically admitted to starting shit with me and my roommates in Richmond to get me here so she could get me on disability. And when I moved here and had money for a car, they refused to let me buy it or the other cars I found. That's what I'm dealing with, but it's a LONG story dude.
A good start but it could have been even better. Now there isn't much point continuing today. But tomorrow I will do better. I guess this week was just going to be a learning curve anyway, since the weekend is a write-off. This whole month is going to be stop-start. Frustrating as hell, but at least next week I can try to make the best of things, so I can do well in the summer.I'm feeling more confident about things now anyway.
I hate it when people won't be flat out honest with what they're saying. I wear my heart on my sleeve. So, when someone enters a conversation with a non-committal and "just stating facts" tone, but refuse to say they disagree with what's said, that bugs the hell out of me.It basically amounts to "I'm not going to say you're wrong, but I am going to affirm everything you disagree with without saying I agree with anything I'm saying." Then they get mad at me for calling it out, saying I read too much into it. Try not sounding like a robot, and actually articulate your own feelings if you're going to talk. I can take dissent. I can't stand this fake bullshit.
There are people doing work in my house right now. Redoing my bathroom. I've never done this before and it is fucking terrifying. I'm having a mild panic attack
>>31167088Having strangers in your home is the absolute worst.
There is fog rolling through the trees, down the hill towards the Mississippi. I had some grandiose fantasy on the drive into town. I didn't buy any drugs today. I might read some Walt Whitman later.
