How can you tell if you will regret having kids or not?
1. do you believe in science and biology? a lot of your child will be determined by genetic and epigenetic factors. believing in nurture will drive you insane. op picrel is 100% true, under 4 they didn't understand right and wrong and over 11 or 12 they don't listen to you and mostly love their friends more. you get eight years max to make an impression. can you accept your powerlessness over another entities biology and wherever it leads them?2. do you have, if not success, a vision for your future you works towards as an ideal? you will be ground to paste with the insane responsibility if you wake up each day only dealing with day to day. 3. do you have a support structure of people whose opinion you care about and will keep you accountable for making better decisions? 4. (for Americans) do you have 6 months emergency income saved up at minimum to survive in our insanely antinatalist capitalist society? baby get stung by scorpion at random? $2000 for anti venom. ear infection? $300 for ear dropsif you satisfy these criteria you probably won't regret having children
>>31532386I already know I’d regret it because life is already a pain in the ass as a single person. Merely doing the things required to take care of your own person is tiresome. I wanna just lay around and be left the fuck alone. If I had a kid I’d be a slave to their needs for 18 years.
>>31532386I am afraid to say that there may always be regret, such is the nature of decision making - to pick a thing out of the many others which could have been.The word decision, after all, came from the latin word "Decidere" which means "to cut.".This may be a matter of what nature of regret that you wish to take.
Try to make sure your life is in the best order possible beforehand? Think about why you want to have children and whether those reasons are good ones and likely to persist when you're faced with the day to day job of caring for and guiding someone?And also you probably will regret it or at least feel burdened by it, sometimes. Everyone gets frustrated and fed up and parenting is a pretty intense job. I'd think about whether you could return to your reasons for it even when you have moments of burnout.
>>31532420Wife and I are so close to having kids it scares me. I'm going through line by line in the marriage code to find issues and reasons not to do it. There is so much risk for the reward and the reward might not even come. Met someone recently with autistic daughter and swayed my opinion even more. No free time , broke forever, wife could just pack up and leave for any reason any time.
>>31532456Not trying to demoralize but you should look up stories of regretful parents. There is so much trad larping about how you'll regret not having them, no one talks about the other side.
>>31532386I have kids and don't regret them.This op is correct >>31532419Your children are determined mostly by the person you fuck, and less by how you bring them up.You have less influence on them than you think and that's a good thing. Nature knows a fucktonne more about offspring than you do.Who you fuck determines whether you will regret your children or not.Your job is to:+- Choose a decent mate- Create a safe environment- Feed them non shit food- Educate them in the reality of life- Make sure their peer group is a good one.
>>31532386>How can you tell if you will regret having kids or not?I doubt there's a surefire way to know. The idea is always terrifying, it changes a lot in life. The earliest years are the hardest, but the other side of infancy is good times with your kids. I've always loved it. Even when my kids are shrieking at the top of their lungs I am happy to be surrounded by my family. That said, I don't recommend EVERYONE have kids anymore to friends. It's not for everyone. It's for me, that's for damn sure, but everyone? Absolutely not.
>>31532386do or do not, you will regret both.
Too much risk and I'm not talking about myself or my issues here, it's the other person that doesn't exist I would bring into this shit. All reasons not to have them are good reasons
>>31532386if you can raise a dog, a kid will be easy. but a lot of people dont even know how to raise a dog so they screw their kids up
>>31533576Not even close, your kids don't stop being your kids after a certain age. I was raised by a nice family yet still had shit life due to bad luck and outside factors that fucked up my mental health. It's just too much of a risk
>>31532386>reddit screenshot threadI LOVE THESE
>>31534041>can't tell reddit is an entirely different site from quora
It's like that Schopenhauer quote. No matter what you do, you'll regret it. Have children, you'll regret it. Don't have children, you'll regret that too. Have children or don't, you'll regret it
>>31534803Not having children means only you are regretting it, not them as well And the regret of being born is much worse
>>31534824I'm not here to argue. Try quoting some other anon and use those exact words and you might get the meaningless argument you long for
696I truly don't know nor care about the difference.
