I have known my best friend for almost 8 years and he recently told me he has a sadistic personality. He said he likes to harm others it makes him feel good he wants to do it but he won't he said these thoughts make him feel guilty that he's a bad person but deep down I know he is a great person. He is the kindest person I met and just out of the blue he told me this. It was shocking but I want to help him. He talks to me about it that makes him feel better he even talks to himself for hours. I'm genuinely concerned about him told him to see a doctor but he says he doesn't want to. I'm just confused what should I do Or tell him?
>>31538905 https://voca.ro/198C3qZjoCL9
>>31538981I know he's scared that if he went to the doctor they might send him to mental hospital or something like that he talks about it but it's not a permanent solution anyways thanks for your advice.
>>31538905Maybe your friend should get into consensual S&M. That way he can hurt people and not feel bad about it.
>>31538905If it’s just sadistic thoughts, it’s most likely a case of OCD. If he does harm others and feels joy from it, then it’s a deeper issue. Most likely stemming from very far back times. So personality disorder would be on the table for diagnosis, who knows. Fundamentally though, the joy from causing others pain is a satisfaction that comes from the feeling of being in power/control. It’s shouting ‘BOO!’ to make you jump in fright and then laughing at what I was able to make you do on command. Except adults addicted to this sort of thing don’t just stop at ‘BOO’, they go much further to the point of manipulation or violence in worst cases. People who are like this are usually from low control environments. Meaning, they were young and vulnerable once, and they had no real power or control. And then something happened to them or their home, something very very bad. And they developed an obsession to get the control/power they wished they had back then. So when they hurt people and they flinch, it soothes them, it deludes them they have that control they wanted so much. And they become addicted. Even dependent. Because they won’t want to let go of that ‘control’. They feel if they let themselves be vulnerable, something Hellish will happen, just like it did before when they were younger.
>>31539111Nah bro I'm trying to help him this will make him addicted to it.
>>31539169He hasn't hurt anyone yet and I hope he wont although sometimes he would run after frogs with a brick and try to smash them but he fails. I know he is from a really good family and his parents raised him right. I don't know that in some point of life he was vulnerable or insecure but I'm sure that he likes to be the one in charge of everything.
>>31539194Who knows. When I was like your friend, when I told people my family life was ‘fine’ that was a lie. And when people visited my family and they’d perform as being nice and pretend to be one big happy family, that too was a lie. My family was completely different to what others saw behind closed doors, when the visitors went home. That’s just my tale though. Your friend could have ended up like this for a multitude of untold reasons. So therapy will be what he might want to try. As long as your friend doesn’t admit to any plans of harming himself or others, he won’t get warded.
>>31539203I'll be honest I have no such friend it's actually me who has this problem I'm writing from my friends perspective that how he perceives me. So i know I have had no family problem or so.
>>31539213I see. Now if you were willing to disguise yourself so easily, how can you expect me to believe your family life was fine? Is that another disguise? I don’t know. You do though. And if you are like how I used to be, then don’t be surprised if lying to yourself is also fogging up things. Aka normalising traumas. I normalised mine, thought I had an ‘OK’ life and genuinely believed that. Right up until the moment I had the courage to speak on how I really grew up. Then I saw the looks of horror on people’s faces. I wasn’t as put together as I pretended.Good luck though, and again, the therapist suggestion remains the same. I wish I’d seen one years ago and I’m glad I did. No shame if you don’t want to yet.
