Anyone use this winman.live ai thing? I'm working on myself and improving my game, thinking of using it as a tool to help get more dates in the mean time, is it legit? Anyone have success with it?

Women are clearly hitting on me at work
Very often when my eyes meet with slme qt they smile or get shy
Oftentimes they stare at me, or at my chest

But theres a problem, i barely ever go out, so i dont talk to any outside of gym.

Dating apps was a complete waste of time becaue my face is bricked

What do

How to get dates on dating apps post from another thread
Here's the basic gestalt
>match with girl
>wait at least 12-24 hours to not appear desperate. Also she may message you first.
>Message her something casual. NOT something horny. The less effort you put into your first message, the better.
for example "I like your socks." or "I like your eyebrows."
>if she has any interest in you, she'll respond positively. "haha thank youu! They're comfy socks :3"
>now you can chit for A LITTLE. 3-5 messages back and forth max. No actual conversations. Basically just look at her profile and see what she's into. For example if there's a picture of her in the woods, ask if she goes hiking. If there's a picture of her eating something, ask what restaurant it is.
>Now using what you know about her, tell (don't ask) that you should do it together sometime.
>"Nice I like hiking too. There's a lake in Normaltown that has a great trail that goes around it. We should go sometime."
>if she likes you she'll agree
>"that sounds great! we definitely should! :3"
>now ask for her number
>end of interaction
>a day or so later message her "hey it's anon"
it should go like this
>"hey anon! :3"
>"Still up for that hike? Weather looks good this weekend."
>"Yesss. When?"
>"Meet there Saturday at four?"
>"Perfect, I'm looking forward to it :3"
then on Saturday send her a confirmation text in the early afternoon, but do it in an aloof way
>"Hey still on for four today?"
if she likes you she'll either say yes or reschedule. If she lost interest she'll say she can't make it and won't reschedule. If she lost interest stop pursuing.
Then you go on a date and have a good time.
It's not hard.

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Reminder that she expects you to hit on her.

Beautiful women don't fuck cowards.

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I'm stuck bros. I'm definitely above-average-looking judging by the amount of stares I get from zoomer chicks when at the store. I have had women approach me and buy me drinks at bars. I'm incredibly grateful that I'm good-looking because I'd be completely hopeless otherwise.

Yet dating apps were a failure for me, and I've never gotten past hugs and flirting at bars. I've gotten one phone number which didn't go anywhere. After going out every weekend for months, I've concluded that nightlife isn't for me. What other options are there? I'm 3 years out of college. I tried dance classes but there was only one chick my age there and we didn't connect.

Am I really forced to cold approach in public? Is that the only way left? Can anyone actually tell me if this is viable nowadays? I live in a city of 150k people.

>>31620256
Seconding this question.
I'm maladjusted as fuck so I need answers to a lot of obvious questions, and when I ask actual people for advice it only leads creates more questions for me. I used the wingman thing for a free trial and it seemed like it was actually pretty good because I could ask as many dumb followup questions as I needed. On the other hand, I feel like a retard buying dating advice from an AI chatbot. Does anyone who bought it actually recommend it or did I just get a lucky streak of good answers?

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>6'2", 7" dick
>32 but literally every person I ask guesses I'm in my mid-late 20s
>lost like 30 lbs in the last 6 months, cleaned up look, people who haven't seen me in a while say they barely recognize me
>visible abs starting to come in, broad shoulders, 2/3/4 pl8 for 5 reps on bench/squat/dl
>startup founder, literally my dream come true, pay myself six figure salary and worth millions in stock
>have my own place and a nice truck
>STEM PhD and HYPSM undergrad
>go out pretty much every week with one subset of friends or another
>sociable, no problems talking, have to be comfortable giving public presentations/pitches for my startup
>have had GFs in the past, female friends say I'm quite attractive

>only date I've gotten in the last seven months is with one chubby 4/10 Chinese immigrant student, no sex, didn't even get a second date
According to you FUCKING MORONS I should be knee-deep in pussy. So where is it? What the actual fuck am I doing wrong?
My brother who's a 5'7" twink college dropout that lays flooring for a living and whose only hobbies are overwatch and smoking weed gets more ass than a public toilet seat
What the fuck am I missing? What is so wrong with me? Is it that women can actually fucking sense "Oh he's terminally autistic, we can't let someone that neurodivergent reproduce, tee hee!"
My ex found someone so fucking quickly and is basically rubbing it in my face, why the fuck can't I even get a second date or a ONS?

>inb4 "hurr durr why u so unhappy u have so much"
Let me reframe the question for you - imagine you're able to bend reality to your will to this degree in every other aspect of your life, yet getting even a whiff of pussy is a fucking impossibility. I've negotiated multiple seven-figure contracts but I can't fucking convince a girl to go one a date with me.

>>31620441
>whose only hobbies are overwatch and smoking weed gets more ass than a public toilet seat
ngl this makes me seethe too as someone that spent a lifetime cultivating hobbies, traveling and self impr00ving. While I do enjoy it for its own sake, it hasn't helped me in the dating market much if at all.

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>>31620333
Literally treat women like they're not human. Like how you'd approach a stray cat. Talk down to them. Work about 35% of the time. ;)

>>31620441
some people just have it and some don't anon. you have to accept that there are dudes out there who just naturally can get pussy without even trying. I've known a couple and it was frustrating hearing them talk about all the girls they were fucking, showing me their texts and matches on tinder, etc. it just completely blew my mind and yet for them it was effortless. just DM a chick, text her for a bit, maybe a phone call or two, within 2-3 days she would come over and fuck him. no fucking clue how they did it.

>>31620246
I’ve now for the first time approached a girl at the bus stop. The conversation went well and I got her number but after reaching out she seemed disinterested so I stopped pursuing. Now, I have a couple questions:

1: Where are the best/worst places to approach girls? Bus stop seems ok but I won’t be taking any for a while.

2: How did you get over getting stuck inside your head before doing it? I always seem to make excuses or walk away and say to myself it would look weird to turn back. I seem to be ok when I start the conversation but it’s just the initial approach and opening I need to work on.

>>31620644
Well were they not trying, or were they going on tinder, messaging women, etc. like you said?
Because I have news for you anon: that's trying. Have you done that?

>>31620781
stop trying to be snarky faggot, you know what I mean.

>>31620807
No, I don't. What DO you mean?
Sounds like incel seethe to me. If they did what you said they did...they tried.

>>31620809
>incel seethe
Jesus dude, get a grip

>>31620852
>noooo you can't just accurately label my behavior!

>>31620441
>>only date I've gotten in the last seven months is with one chubby 4/10 Chinese immigrant student, no sex
Have you asked anyone else out on a date in that timeframe?
Also the fact that you have to autistically list all your strong points on paper (including your lifts, which are mid as fuck and not impressive for a guy your size) kind of gives the vibe that you're a boring asshole to be around. If I'm wrong, let me know anon.
You may be able to talk to people in the sense you can recruit investors for your startup, but that's basically just bottom lining it and convincing them to buy in. Being able to talk to a woman, and not only charm her but get her to really feel something for you, is a different skillset.

Hey, i never come to these kinds of threads, but by any chance does anyone know a porn actress that looks like OP pic related?

>>31620781
>>31620809
>>31620859
>Ur just not trying, bro!
I'm the guy who made >>31620441 and yes I am fucking trying
I am active on tinder and bumble, I get maybe one match a month. No replies to my messages except for one conversation that I booked because it was like pulling teeth and I got impatient. Zero dates after four months of being on it.
I cold approach IRL at the time, I try to ask a girl for her number at least once a week. I give out my number all the time, never get texted, get ghosted in the one in maybe 10 or 20 times I get a number back
I go out to bars, there are no fucking young people in bars in my town, everyone is 50 years old +
So tell me more about how I'm not fucking trying

>>31620908
>Have you asked anyone else out on a date in that timeframe?
I don't even get far enough, I either get brushed off IRL or ghosted in texts or social media
> (including your lifts, which are mid as fuck and not impressive for a guy your size)
I'm a recovering fat beer bellied fuck on a hard cut of 1800 kcal a day until I have obvious abs, my lifts aren't going anywhere right now unless I hop on the juice. I listed them because it still shows I'm above beginner levels and have some visible muscles/obviously work out
>the vibe that you're a boring asshole to be around. If I'm wrong, let me know anon.
I've spent the last few years deep in an LTR with basically just my ex and my business contacts to talk to because I WFH. It is possible I got "boring" but IDK, part of my career involves blowing shit up on military bases. I don't think that's boring
>Being able to talk to a woman, and not only charm her but get her to really feel something for you, is a different skillset.
Great so you have any tips on that?

How do I ask girls out in public without being afraid and chickening out?

>>31620972
Do what I did. Be 1000% confident that she'll say no and laugh at you. Expect this outcome. Then do it anyway, for practice. Seriously, I lived my life being a chickenshit about almost everything because of fear of failure. Feel the fear and do it anyway anon.

Im happily married now with a kid and a semi hot wife who adores me.

>>31620972
>>31620990
>Do what I did. Be 1000% confident that she'll say no and laugh at you. Expect this outcome. Then do it anyway, for practice. Seriously
Can confirm. I did the same.
I shifted my win condition to getting rejected and once I got comfortable with that I then moved it to to getting rejected and leaving her comfortable and smiling.

>>31620927
If you're trying, why don't you just say that instead of being a defensive little bitch. No I will not just take you on your word and assume you are, especially when you pull the "no other guy tries but me" routine.
>>31620959
>I either get brushed off IRL or ghosted in texts or social media
So what does that tell you?
>I'm a recovering fat beer bellied fuck on a hard cut of 1800 kcal a day until I have obvious abs,
You're not going to build muscle that way, OR even lose the belly and get your precious abs. You need to do a slow sustainable cut, or else you'll just rebound back. (I'm a personal trainer, don't argue with me). And also, congrats if you lost a lot of weight already, but that also means you had a lot to lose. So, a little more humility and not listing fitness as one of your virtues would be appreciated.
>I've spent the last few years deep in an LTR with basically just my ex and my business contacts to talk to because I WFH
Ok, and which part of that was not self-imposed? Don't complain about choices YOU made.
>my career involves blowing shit up on military bases. I don't think that's boring
Your job may well not be boring, but that doesn't mean that YOU are not boring. A woman won't be dating your job, she'll be dating you.
>Great so you have any tips on that?
I already made it clear. You have to make her feel a certain way. That means having some charisma and playfulness and sexual energy and being a genuine person. Not being some uptight boring asshole who thinks he's special because he has money and a lol2pl8 bench.
Like you complain about it being nothing but 50 year olds at the bar, but that's unironically your crowd. You'd feel more at home with a bunch of boring boomers talking about their Roth IRAs or whatever. Where is your sense of fun, or charm, or adventure? (or danger even) If you're a young guy, going after presumably young women, you won't get there by being an uptight prick.

>>31620333
why quit nightlife? it's the perfect enviroment to meet people

maybe you need to try getting more physical while dancing, go in for the kiss if you feel you can, etc

Always a How to get a women thread
Never a How to get a man thread

Society really is screwed if only one side is trying to figure the other out

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>>31620441
Relationships are formed through proximity and bonding through shared experiences.
You either lack proximity to women, aren't sharing experiences with them, or both.
Shared experiences can be either compatibly matched previous experiences or more organically experienced together through shared activity.

Two quick questions as they can be a problem but just as easily not.
Are you waiting for a girl to indicate interest before asking her out?
Are you hiding your sexuality or sexual interest in a girl out of politeness?

>sociable, no problems talking
You need to expand on this.

And here's a basic question as a litmus test: What is achieved through talking to someone?

>imagine you're able to bend reality to your will to this degree in every other aspect of your life, yet getting even a whiff of pussy is a fucking impossibility.
>imagine
You really need to read more stories. Just in general.
In Taran Wanderer, the hero travels around villages:
>discovers brilliant swordsmith
>likes it
>tries to learn
>crafts a gorgeous sword
>it shatters
>eventually crafts a decent sword
>feels accomplished
>travels on
>finds other masters
>learns in a similar fashion
>finds a master potter
>guy is basically a wizard with clay
>Taran is in love with all of it
>loves the beauty of it
>cares FAR more about ceramics than any other skill
>wants to retire from being a hero
>feels compelled to be a ceramicist
>can't fucking do it at all
>spends three times as long and ten times the effort to learn
>can't fucking do it
>he's gonna carry that weight
I'm not saying you can't learn. I'm saying you lack talent and are also demonstrating a lack of insight into the experiences of others.

>I can't fucking convince a girl to go one a date with me.
It's not about convincing her to go out.
It's about encouraging her positive feelings for you
...while being in close proximity and sharing experiences.

Like the Sun who had a bet with the Wind over which one could remove a man's jacket.

>>31620716
>bus stop
in my opinion, not the best of places
people don't really enjoy commuting and are there to just get back home or get to whatever place they are going to

the best place is a festival, you have a lot more people going alone than you think, there aren't really any social norms about what you should be doing, there's a good ratio of female to male, you don't have to worry where your table is and you can move freely wherever, also, depending on what it is, there's a variety of subcultures or types of people, if i can call it that

and even if you don't manage to meet any girl (which is really hard, there are usually tons of women at any big open air event), you'll have a conversation piece for the next time you talk to someone

>>31621893
That's because it's 95% men posting here.
I could swear I did see a htgm thread not too long ago, unless maybe some fag made it I dunno.

>>31621893
So, who would be giving advice in HTGAM thread? All the 4chan women in successful relationships that achieved them through learning lessons, not blind luck, and can pass on what they learned through advice to others?

That's a helluva venn diagram.

What are some good ways to dominate the other men around the office, anyway?

>walking down the street, no-one around
>cute blonde girl rounds the corner and is approaching me
>i look across the road so avoid uncomfortable glance from a distance
>we approach each other without exchanging eye contact
how could i have pulled it off bros? there was total silence, very uncomfortable but i would feel like i would be making her uncomfortable if it looked at her or said anything

>>31620908
what a faggot, fuck you cunt

the problem with dating, as this thread demonstrates is that yall always expect everyone to be at their very best, and most sociable, or else theyre just the lowest scum of the earth fucks ever imaginable
like have you ever looked at reality and realize that maybe thats not how life works?

chubby guys needs pussy too, boring guys need pussy too, we're not superman, we all have a lot of flaws and doubts, this life is not a fucking eugenic filtering experiment
lower your fucking expectations
let us get some happinness in this life, some of us just go through decades without ever feeling good once, you think thats normal? that's hell, dude, just because I'm not a psychopath like you don't punish me

like oh why are you so autistic and seething
some of us just tries once and thats it cuz im a nervous mess already, im not a fucking psychopath like you to try 200 more times despite feeling like fucking shit, and thats normal, idk why so people are so removed from whats actually normal and go all these fucking lengths just to get some pussy, just to ruin someone elses day, just to be a spiteful cunt for yet another day, for the pettiest of reasons, oh my home life is not good today so let me set you back for decades, like maybe stop and think for a second wtf are you doing and how it affects others, sometimes its good to be selfish, but dont ruin an innocent mans life
im so tired of all your idiots always striving for a status you cannot get and stomping on everyone and abandoning all human values and morals and everything that makes your life worth living at all just for a little bit more joy you selfish fuck

>>31622510
You come into a thread about dating, you're gonna get advice about dating, and no, you are not allowed to be "just human" as a man while dating.

>>31622510
I was just now thinking about that, thanks.

>>31622510
>im not a fucking psychopath like you to try 200 more times despite feeling like fucking shit, and thats normal, idk why so people are so removed from whats actually normal and go all these fucking lengths just to get some pussy, just to ruin someone elses day, just to be a spiteful cunt for yet another day, for the pettiest of reasons,

What exactly are you talking about anyway? The men that approach and hit on 100s of women?

>>31622475
>psychopath like you

I can't speak for everyone here, but I'm definitely not a psychopath. I doubt 99% of the men in here are. There might be one or two that walk up to random women by the 100s and hit on them, however.

So quit fucking with us, bitch.

>>31622612
why not?

>>31620314
based pepe

>>31622510
wtf I thought it was a woman saying this, nevermind ignore everything I said.

>>31622435
either look directly in her eyes or ignore her completely, looking away is a worse option than either of those.

if you are constantly worried you will scare women or need to convince them you're not a serial killer then you will turn them off ASAP. You're fine, you're not scary and you handle yourself well.

How do I develop a sense of assertiveness?
I'm not a push over, but I definitely don't give off an aura of strength. I have a hard time even justifying a sense of self-preservation in myself, and I know people pick up on my depression
Women don't appreciate that

0>>31622701
Because women are the buyers and you are the seller. Would YOU want a toy that wouldn't let you play with it because it was "feeling down?" Of course not, well that's what you are to women when you try to be "human" with them, a defective toy.

>>31622810
idk probably self improvement meaning exercise and maybe combat sports (boxing perhaps?)

>>31622836
the way you think its fucking sad, and you will cater to women who think in this way and thats fucking sad

>>31622960
Oh boo hoo, world sucks, get over it. If you wanna get yourself hurt by believing in fairy tale shit like "love" that's on you, buddy.

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>>31620256
i tend to get more objective and better advice online then i'm capable of processing for myself so I copy/pasted a bunch of my answers online and tried to train AI to give me advice. it was actually pretty good, though it doesn't talk the way I do. the advice was actionable and real

>>31622810
literally practice at home. take five minutes a day of imagining a situation where a woman cuts you off in line or something and you gently and flirtingly bust her balls for it with a smile on your face. gotta keep doing this for a while until you start seeing yourself in a new light, and then the behaviors will come out naturally when the real situations arrive

>>31622996
women with balls like that are so rare, damn dating might be easier if I looked more feminine or something

>>31621943
I think the bus stop is a perfectly valid place to approach people and it could make their commute better having someone to talk with. The girl who J approached last time was actively participating in our conversation and even asking me questions. Of course if they’re not into it I’ll just walk away.

>festival
Good suggestion, but for me I would only have that opportunity a few times a year. I was more so looking for places to approach that I could go to a bit more frequently that isn’t a bar as I don’t drink and would be fully dependent on tagging along with friends who are already planning on going there.

I've been going out more and discovered good looking women are either with a man, surrounded by men vying for their attention, or in a group with their friends. So you will have to approach in one of these 3 scenarios.

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>>31620333
>I've concluded that nightlife isn't for me

yup, it's starting. the thing people told me would happen is happening. One of my few high-school friends got a girl, and it's only a matter of time before the rest follow suit.

We were the loser group, could you imagine being singled out as THE loser of losers? All because you're a huge pussy? I'd never show my face again out of embarrassment. And it's actually gonna happen to me, holy.

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>>31622462
Seethe harder for me, my sexless friend.

>match with cute 32 year old christian girl
>we start talking
>anon before we meet I need to make sure youre religious
>'I am, ive been christian my whole life'
>do you go to church every sunday? Im looking for a pious man and i've been hurt before by men not being truthful
>"i dont go every week, but i do go for easter and christmas, spirtuality and family are important to me"
>oh sorry anon i'm sure youre great but i dont think we would be a good fit, good luck!


This isnt the first time religious girls have given me very specific requirements for dating but I guess being spiritual and believing in god isnt enough

>>31623510
Have you thought about being less of a pussy then?
I mean, you've already identified your main problem, but apparently you're also not doing anything to fix it. That's just strange to me.
Most of these idiots in these threads have no self-awareness. You do, so that's the hard part already. Now you just have to act on it.

When she asks how old you are in response to your date invitation, is she interested? If I have good convos and I reveal my age to them rejecting me, (over 30/but look under 30) should I just lie?

>>31620990
still. how did you get yourself to physically move your feet and say hi? i'm paralyzed

>>31623061
that's just an example, you can use any made up scenario you want

>>31623899
Just FYI that wasn't, me the guy that posted this >>31620441
I do think you're an asshole but sometimes you just need tough love from assholes. I'm taking your advice in stride, I need to get my swag back somehow and inspire that sense of "danger and play" I used to have.

>>31623996
ok then, how do you suggest I get out there and do it?
>inb4 just go do it lol
if thats the extent of the help i can get then why am i even here

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to any guys out there this might help:

things you thing are attraction triggers for women:
-height
-face
-looks
-hair
-money

...i mean, they don't hurt. but they don't even remotely move the needle in women's loins like the following:

-obvious indicators that you are preselected by other hot women: pictures of you with hot women on Instagram, etc.
-subtle indicators that you are preselected by other hot women: signs that you are socially reinforced and therefore confident, you are outgoing, you don't put her on a pedestal or take her very seriously at all
-demonstrations of skills in social scenarios: DJing, playing musical instruments, anything that commands attention
-commanding the power and status in a room: you can be a manager at a Denny's or run all crime in north Jersey, as long as people defer to you when you're in the room

women don't work like us anon. they don't wanna tap our sexy ass because they don't give a shit if we can bear children. they give a shit if we can protect them from other hunter-gatherer tribes with our social status. develop your skills accordingly

>>31622475
>yall always expect everyone to be at their very best, and most sociable, or else theyre just the lowest scum of the earth fucks ever imaginable
All or Nothing Thinking is a well documented cognitive distortion that seems more common in responses like yours than in the advice given here.

I have repeatedly encountered anons who are *literally* asking how they can get a girl without socializing or interacting with people. The answer to that is: Prostitution.

You might not be like them, but you sound like them.

>boring guys need pussy too
Many women are fine with or *want* a boring guy. My cousin married one after her first husband drank himself to death in his thirties.
But you still need to pleasantly interact with the girl.

>we're not superman, we all have a lot of flaws and doubts
So do women. Everyone does. Even Mother Theresa was a better Christian than a humanitarian.

>this life is not a fucking eugenic filtering experiment
Of course not. It's an adaptability trial. Survival of the fittest refers to those most adapted to the environment. If you refuse to adapt, or can't adapt, you the way of William Macy in Pleasantville.
It's neither fair nor inevitable.
Everyone can change.

>lower your fucking expectations
We're not expecting you to shoot baskets from half court on your first day.
But you sound like you're refusing to practice dribbling the ball.

>let us get some happinness in this life, some of us just go through decades without ever feeling good once, you think thats normal? that's hell, dude
That's a mental and emotional disorder that is 100% GUARANTEED not to be "fixed" by a girl.

>inb4 getting a girl would help
So it would be a step towards happiness?
As in, it's possible to improve in small steps towards a larger goal?
As in you aren't expecting a girl to make your life a perfect existence?
Small steps.

>>31624250
Yeah that's fair, I didn't think that guy was you for what it's worth but thank you for clarifying anyway. I don't know why some posters here like that guy will take personal offense to things not even directed towards them.
"Danger and play" is actually just about as good a term as I could use to sum it up, so you're getting it. Another thing you touched on inadvertently: I am probably an asshole, but I'm an asshole with a heart. I'm rough around the edges sometimes and I don't take any shit (especially here), BUT I am a good person and when the chips are down, I'm the exact kind of person you want in your corner.
This isn't about me, but rather to illustrate that THAT is what women like. A good guy, with a bit of an edge. A lot of the guys here who struggle are the exact inverse of that. They'll be boring, "safe", and try way too hard to be the "nice" guy and overly proper. But peel back the mask a little, and a lot of these guys are total dicks. Or schemers. Not nearly as "nice" as they'd have you think.
Now the interesting part (and this might be where you come in) is that there is a third category of guys who aren't actually dicks or bad people, but because they're uptight stiffs they come across the same way as these "nice guys". Women know what these "nice guys" are up to and they have their defenses raised against it. So if you come across the same way they do, rightly or wrongly a lot of women will just paint you with that same brush and stay clear. So how to avoid that? Not by being something you're not, not by trying too hard to swing the pendulum the other way and be an asshole, but just by showing a bit of charm and genuine interest in them.
So for example let's say you're on a date and getting to know each other. Don't prattle on about your job and your net worth and your lifts. Just give passing answers about what you do and how you got into it maybe, but then steer the conversation. IE
>but enough about my job...tell me about YOU

>>31624426
>con't

And then, don't just ask them simple questions. Get in their head. Ask them about their WHY. Ask how something made them feel, and then spin off with a
>yeah I totally get that, one time I blah blah blah
And get them to laugh and smile and actually display some interest and attraction without simping. That's how you get them to open up, that's how you get them to feel something. If they feel good talking to you, they associate those good feelings with YOU. That's what it means to be charming.
No man ever swept a woman off her feet prattling on about his job, his investments, and his 2 plate bench my friend. Let those speak for themselves without talking about it, and meanwhile actually show you have a heart and a personality. Show her that YOU are the great thing here, not the money you made or the weight you lifted.

>>31624263
Well ask yourself this, which would you regret more?
Trying with a girl you're interested in and getting a no (and join the club, every guy gets those, even the chaddest of chads) OR living with the constant pang of regret, and wondering what if? AND, in your case, being "the loser of the losers" as you said?
You miss all the shots you don't take. It's cliched advice, but for very good reason.

if you bring flowers for a date, do you give them to her at the start or at the end? just seems like they'd potentially be in the way during dinner

>>31622701
>>31622836
No. It's that in society, people withhold their flaws and present their strengths when getting to know people: "I'm good at X, is that compatible with you? What are you good at?"
The unspoken correlation is that you don't know someone's flaws until you know them better.
So of you *start* with your human flaws, it seems like those flaws are as good as you get and you have much worse flaws hidden.

>>31622960
>the way you think its fucking sad, and you will cater to women who think in this way and thats fucking sad
Agreed. Not that it saddens me. I accept that some people willingly choose to limit their color palette to grey tones.

>>31623510
>could you imagine being singled out as THE loser of losers?
That was twelve years of my life.
I moved on

I went on three dates with this woman. We aren't official or anything yet though. She recently told me she went to the hospital (with photo evidence) after having sex with a person who didnt respect her dropping her consent. She told me shes in alot of pain and feels regretful and basically told me everything that happened. She said she did this because she was molested at a young age and was scared if she did it with someone she cared about she would lock up and scare them off by making it a bad time. So she said she wanted to do this to see if she was ready. She did lie about the fact only talking to me and disliking casual sex. I feel many emotions going on.

>>31624263
Start by asking yourself some questions. What is it that you want to do that you aren't doing? What is actually stopping you from doing those things? Like, imagine you are about to attempt to do it, what goes through your mind? Why aren't you doing all the things that you want to do?

>>31624532
wow. great advice

>>31624504
Extremely cheesy move but it might work.

I'd only do it if it's a single rose or you're picking her up at her house so she can put them in water.
Because yeah, they'll get in the way awkwardly.

>>31623510
them the breaks sonny. not everyone can be a winner in life. the world needs losers too

>>31623981
>I guess being spiritual and believing in god isnt enough
Because it isn't
I can only speak from a Catholic perspective, but going to Mass regularly and receiving the Eucharist (which you can only do in a state of grace) are ESSENTIAL aspects of worship. This whole "I believe in God (you didn't even capitalize it) and I'm spiritual" thing only comes off as pussy-footed fence sitting. No, you are not a Christian if you don't go to Church and receive the Eucharist. I don't care how much of a "good person" you are, and the truth is you're probably not even as good of a person as you think you are.
Either actually commit to being a Christian and believing in Jesus or leave the religious girls alone. You should be properly practicing your faith out of a love for God and desire to go to Heaven anyway. Do you think Jesus is happy with you using religion as a way to pick up girls?

>>31624709
fuck the church. it has been inflitrated by satan for decades if not centuries. I'm not going to there to doom my soul

>>31624709
>>31624715
this screams bullet dodged. fuck that whore. she sounds like she has unrealistic expectations, thinking that someone will only be good if they go to church every sunday. lmao. fuck what happens the rest of the week. some guy could murder children and rape the elderly and as long as he goes to church on sunday, all is forgiven.

>>31624493
When I weigh my options I always take the loneliness every time. I don't want to, but I do.
>>31624634
>What is it that you want to do that you aren't doing?
Obviously, the subject of the thread. Getting a woman, somehow.
>What is actually stopping you from doing those things?
My greatest enemy: the pink/grey fleshy thing inside my skull
>what goes through your mind?
I'm one of those 'abstract thinker' types so it's hard to quantify but it's overwhelming fear and crushing anxiety that manifests in the form of a physical barrier that, if I cross, makes my body start to shut down. I get physically effected if I dare to think about 'trying'.

>>31624715
>>31624741
Insincere fence-sitters detected
Keep making all the excuses and justifications you want, you'll have to face Jesus eventually. I'm sure "but I'm spiritual bro!" will be a satisfactory explanation for Him who literally said you must eat the Bread and drink the Wine of His Body and Blood
I'll pray for your souls

>gf is 33 I'm 29
>not much experience in my 20s compared to her but she's very very into me and essentially instigated everything until I clued in
>things on the up, had some performance anxiety but her patience and me abstaining from porn and shit worked out
>her only concern is with the lack of LTR experience I have I might not be forward enough with things such as important relationship steps to take where she's had to bring them up first etc

So what things should I be more proactive on? We had a lengthy chat over dinner on some of our own issues but this came to light after the fact in a casual exchange. We're like 2 months in at this point, she has her own place and I'm at home saving still, I could probably stand to be the first to say the dreaded "I love you" at some point soon because it does feel we've moved quite fast (and that scares her in a good way apparently) But beside that and an eventual move-in down the road I'm not sure exactly what's there to bring up?

>>31624811
i agree, to be a good person doesn't mean you are a christian
but, i think that nowadays, it takes some effort just to find a young man who doesn't drink or do drugs, so in my opinion the girl shouldn't have her standards set in stone, relationships need time, patience, understanding
who's to say that the guy who goes to church won't get a mid life crisis, feeling he missed out on his youth, and start cheating on his wife and going out all the time?
the Bible is a holy book, but just because someone fits the virtues listed doesn't mean you'll like them, it's not a good basis for attraction or romantic love, you can't predict or control passion

>>31624767
maybe you need to dip your toes in the water first, maybe first start socializing a bit more with guys / girls regardless

>>31624880
Literally same age gap with my ex but we started 26 (me) and 30 (her). It was my first relationship as well and she got out of like an 8 year one about a year or so before we met. After 2.5 years it turned out I was the one better at being in a relationship as well as being more mature about pretty much everything other than having a good job or my own place, which she did. She nuked the relationship over the course of two months due to really manageable issues. As long as you set and adhere to your boundaries you'll be okay. Our relationship moved really quickly as well. Make sure she doesn't have BPD or some sort of legitimate trauma. Btw where did you guys meet?

>>31624811
the church is the church of satan. you're a disgrace to our Lord. Jesus would throw out the current antipope like he did the Pharisees

How do i gain confidence and stop being on the verge of tears?

Who the fuck do you fucking think you are you fucking faggot cock sucker? I dont give a fucking rats asshole if you're a Navy Seal or not. All you fucking faggots do is sit around snorting cocaine and jerking each other off to pictures of each others wives. You fucking **** **** faggot mother fucking dick head piece of shit. Please send the storm my way. I am a 4 time purple belt in Mixed Martial Arts, I could kill all of you faggots with my left nut. You think that fucking people are supposed to be intimidated by your hollow threats of fucking someone up? Let me tell you something faggot, I will find you. I will cut out your fucking eyeballs with a spoon and stick them in your asshole so you can watch yourself take my dick up your ass while I'm raping you, Fucking queer. You don't know who the fuck I am. Wanna know how much of a sick mother fucker I am? Ask Chuck Norris' wife. She couldn't even take the tip of my cock in her ass without screaming. Chuck Norris is a BITCH to me, and you're nothing but a speck of sand in the desert you're stationed in, to Chuck. So what does that make you compared to me? Nothing. You are fucking NOTHING. You're not even a fucking MOLECULE compared to me you fucking dick sucker. So before you send your arsenal off cock sucking faggot Navy bitches, why don't you stop and ask yourself, "Is it really worth it? Do I want to put myself, my friends, and my family in danger, because I don't know when to shut the fuck up?". Then answer the question by saying no and moving on with your pathetic excuse you call a life, you fag.

>>31624939
We met at work funnily enough. It all got ironed out there and she's got a far bigger resume so was able to move on quite easily. So I guess you could say she's got more capability to earn more, but no savings due to allegedly exes that fucked her over.

The one thing she brought up was her having BDD. It was worse when she was younger, borderline skeleton apparently - but she noted how she's been comfortable and content with me so things like having her arms out or wearing dresses and not just jeans etc have come more natural as she's making an effort for me.
I've basically been myself the whole time, got her laughing me into her bed in her words, my general "whatever" about things compared to her rockier exes seems to be why she feels so strongly about me and can let her guard down (I don't do much on my phone, one ex never let her look at hers for example) - but I also think that's where my inexperience comes in. That is unfortunately part of the package of dating me in the current year but that doesn't mean I'm willing to lead myself blindly into bad times with her you know?

Boundaries are there though. She has a lot of male friends from previous areas and jobs who she checks in with very rarely. One tried to invite her on a date when he knew she was with me and she put forward a plan to basically come along to turn it into just a hang out as originally intended so I can meet this alleged best friend (who fucked up by creeping her out by disrespecting our relationship this way) I'd say she's still smitten but it's hard to take her concern of my experience when I'm still patiently navigating the minefield that is her life.

>>31625043
that age gap will have little to no negative consequences on your relationship. I just turned 30 and my gf is 20, 21 in December. fortunately I live in Europe so no judgement but it can make certain things difficult

>>31624880
This is a fear of mine. Good luck. I guess if this doesn't work out atleast now you will have experience for next time.

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cock blocked by fat cunt.
>go to drink and draw event
>after drawing I talk to a few people
>sit next to two cute girls and we chat about our drawings
>the red head clearly has a boyfriend but the other girl is talkative and nice and quite engaged in the convo and asks me questions
>fat cunt with tattoos comes from across the room (she knows the girls)
>fatso acts like I'm not there
>the nice girl introduces me:" hey, this is anon!"
>fatso says hi, immediately starts talking to the girls
>I ask her about her drawings and she shows them to us, and ignores my comments, which were nice
>fatso asks the girls if they have been to the balcony yet, they get up and leave with fatso

I've seen people taking about this but it's honestly fucking hilarious how real this meme is. Fuck fat people, it's on sight for me.

>>31624709
I'm Orthodox, so I dont know what catholic traditions are like. I enjoy religous women over athiest women but I dont have a set rule in my head that women i date must pray x times a day.
I know God loves me and I love him.
I can only guess based on her wording that she dated a man or either lied or had opposing religious beliefs to hers.
These days some denominations are pro-abortion, pro-war etc. so who even knows anymore

>>31624881
>who's to say that the guy who goes to church won't get a mid life crisis, feeling he missed out on his youth, and start cheating on his wife and going out all the time?
Why are you concerning yourself with the hypothetical splinters in your neighbors' eyes when you're walking around with logs in yours? Stop making excuses and g to Church!
>>31624982
>the church is the church of satan. you're a disgrace to our Lord. Jesus would throw out the current antipope like he did the Pharisees.
Please explain how the doctrine of the Church is antithetical to Jesus' teachings without referring tot the individual politically-motivated actions of single priests, bishops or cardinals. You had better be prepared to discuss the Council of Nicaea, the Council of Trent, and the ramifications of Vatican II

(spoiler: you're just making excuses for why you're too lazy to take an hour of your time out of the 168 in a week while you also seek advice ITT on how to indulge in your lust)

>>31625149
>referring tot the individual politically-motivated actions of single priests, bishops or cardinals

why? even the pope himself is a liberal cuckold. the church as an instiution has failed miserably in the last decades. I'm not going there with a gun to my head. it's an affront to my faith

>>31625282
So you can't. Gotcha.
You can always go to a pre-Vatican II Latin Mass church

But you won't. Because you're not Christian. Because Christians receive the Body and Blood of Christ, as He commanded to do in memory of Him as part of the New and Everlasting Covenant. No Eucharist, not a Christian, Jesus literally said so himself and that's even in the earliest versions of the Gospels before the institutionalization of the Church
>But like, I pray and read the Bible and am spiritual bro!
Ok great. You read the verse where Jesus almost broke the Fourth Commandment to be with His Father in the Temple. How about the institution of the Eucharist in the Last Supper?
Stop making excuses for being lazy. Go to Church.

>>31620246
any tips regarding crazy girls? chick at the game believes in crystals, astrology and all that kinda stuff. has the eyes of a psycho too, looks a little like she’s on coke and it’s very intense. but damn she’s fucking hot. she asked for me snapchat last week but i haven’t engaged with her yet. need some of that loony bin pussy atleast once in my life

>>31625149
this thread isn't about Chrisianity, it was about girls
i'm just saying you shouldn't pick your partner based on a checklist, there's something to your instinct and gut feeling

I don't know what's happening.
>cute girl is allegedely interested in me, most people at work have been rumoring about it for a while
>they invite me to their group just to go out when there's her as well, I guess they are so bored they want to be a cupid in between us
>I've never drunk before in my life, but when she asks I try it out, it's nothing special desu
>go out with them twice, yesterday in particular at 4am when everyone was done drinking, I accompany her home and she goes "i don't want to go home yet", so we walk around town for anothe rcouple hours chatting
>eventually she's too tired, get her home, I initiate a kiss because fuck it, she responds after a bit of delay and hugs me and hugs me and goes in for another kiss, so clearly she's interested right?
>confesses that she won't invite me in to her house because someone else is already sleeping in the spare bed... her boyfriend (work is much closer to her house, so it would have been better for me to sleep at her place and go to work directly from there in the morning, since I had to work)
>later find out she hasn't had sex with her bf in like a year, but somehow still together, she got interested in me because she had a horny dream about me railing her

wtf am I supposed to do?
If she just wanted a human dildo, she could get one anywhere, is she actually interested in me? why has she still not left her bf, wtf?
will she just leave me when she has a horny dream about someone else?

I'm a virgin, ex neet, just recently lost a shitton of weight and starting to gain back some self esteem, no friends IRL, I just spend all time reading books and shit like that
No clue how to behave, I don't want to send her too many messages to not seem too creepy, but she rarely initiates messages, and now she's on vacation to her family for 1 week so I won't see her for a while...

I'm honestly starting to get anxiety attacks every time I get a message because it could be her and everything could pop any second, hlp

>>31620246
I recently came into contact with a girl who had a huge crush on me back in the day (I was like 17 or something and she was like 10). Fast forward to now, she's 21. Ngl anons, she's hot as all hell now and she's being quite direct with me. I'm tempted but I have a girlfriend. Maybe in my full degen days I would've gone for it but I couldn't hurt my girl like that. Anyways, just wanted to vent.

>>31625563
first, decide if you want to be moral about this
if you think you'll feel bad for being the one she cheated on her bf with, then don't do anything

if you do decide to go through with this (again, it's your choice, no one will judge you whatever you decide), then you have to figure out whether or not this is just a physical attraction or not

she might just want a one time thing, or she wants to sleep with you on the regular, or, she likes you and wants to hang out with you, watch movies, that sort of thing
you have to figure that out for yourself, just keep the aloof attitude for now

>>31625563
The honest to God truth? I would say don't get involved in that mess. I know you're a virgin but trust me, I'd wait a little bit more just to keep you conscience clean and not have a crazy boyfriend bash your head in with a bat.

It's good you're gaining self-esteem. Use that to other advantages. Begin getting involved in some hobbies where you can meet other people and just learn to be around women in general. If these people asked you out and this girl is into you, then at least you're doing something right and are not coming off as weird or whatever. It can happen again, there's lots of women in this world. Maybe if she leaves her boyfriend and then she's single, I'd consider it. But not a serious relationship, considering she's willing to kiss another man while in an LTR.

That's just me, though. But remember there's plenty of fish in the sea, man. Go get some other gal who wants you to rail her without involving you in dumb drama.

>>31625624
I'll be honest I don't really have any particular feeling for her, she quite cute tho (unrelated, but fore some reason her face is the only face I aboslutely cannot picture/remember in my head. I literally can't picture what she looks like in my head, first time this has ever happened to me with someone I know decently) the idea in my mind initially was to just go with the flow, get some experience at her pace, and worst case scenario if I fuck everything up in a few months when I stop working there I'll block everyone from there and pretend nothing ever existed, I guess

what I didn't expect was the anxiety, it's getting quite bad, every time my phone vibrates my hr skyrockets, I start sweating and getting shivers, tomorrow morning first thing I'll go to the pharmacy to try and get something for it (Idk, ashwaganda I guess? otc drugs probably won't do much but still...)

>>31625657
>what I didn't expect was the anxiety, it's getting quite bad, every time my phone vibrates my hr skyrockets, I start sweating and getting shivers, tomorrow morning first thing I'll go to the pharmacy to try and get something for it
Unironically talk to other girls. If not, keep yourself busy with other stuff. The moment you begin to get anxiety over a girl you're just talking to is the moment you lose

my wife confessed that she snuck out to cheat on me and the man who she consented to have sex with her hit her over the head and raped her multiple times. Her body is beaten and bruised all over. I feel so utterly hollow and devoid.

>>31625708
based rapist punishing adulterous whores

>>31625652
>>31625675

sounds preetty reasonable honestly
I don't feel like I have a dirty conscience, I've never seen nor know the name of this bf, and I don't THINK I have much serious feelings for this girl, so I only feel kind of detached like he doesn't really exist as a human, but more a background unnamed npc I guess? ok I realize writing that down that it sounds slightly fucked up...

anyway, I'll try to limit my daily messages with her, at least a couple days without initiating any conversation... and then see how this mess develops once she comes back, if at all

thanks for listening to my small rantt

>>31624659
Fair point.
The inherent advice there is to try to remember that others have lived through and survived the things you fear.

I couldn't really improve on the other anon's line of questioning what he was doing to become less of "a pussy".

>be a software developer of this student start up group in a start up competition at my university
Is it a good or bad idea to ask this girl I know on discord if she’s interested in being a developer alongside me? Shes a comp sci student. I also have a big ass crush on her. But we havent really talked a lot.

>>31625563
>>31625624
>>31625652
>>31625657
>>31625657
>>31625758

You're looking at this the wrong way. I agree move on from her, but your esteem and confidence should be increased because a cute girl finds you attractive. Roll with it. Still go out in groups, but start approaching other girls. You now know you've got what it takes so have fun with it.

Posted this in atoga, reposting here because it's a slower thread. I know long posts don't tend to do well here so please bear with me, I'm trying to keep it as short as possible.

My new coworker and I hit it off as friends pretty quickly. Another girl who was already working with me prior to my new coworker's arrival (I'll call her Sam) took notice and began hanging out with us at work too. Me and Sam always got along just fine but we weren't like, friends, she was just one of the people at work I found pleasant.

Sam began to pick up some of our new coworkers personality traits. Taking her jokes and trying to interact with me in the same way she does. It was a little strange because the change was sudden and almost kind of inorganic considering that wasn't how she used to act towards me at all but whatever, she's cute so I went a long with it.

Now there's another girl who began working there recently. When I expressed interest in her all of a sudden now Sam is trying to become buddies with this new girl too. Sam is now jokingly calling me a whore saying I flirt with every girl and saying I wish this new girl was my gf. I've been told that when I'm not around Sam brings me up and asks questions about me, who I'm talking to, what I've been doing, etc.

They tell her to just ask me directly but she won't do it? One of them said it feels like she's talking to them as an analog to get information about me and the other guy we work with's personal lives. What the fuck is she doing? Trying to reverse cock block in some strange way? Can't stand the sight of other women getting attention over her? There's more to the story but this shit is already too long. If anyone responds I'll elaborate.

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>>31621885
>why quit nightlife
because after months of going out every weekend, I found myself surrounded by depressed loser alcoholics and discovered to my horror that I was becoming like them. I spent too much money, gained weight, and got close to fighting several times because dudes would quickly get aggressive if they thought I was a threat. every girl worth looking at was escorted around by at least one guy, sometimes up to three. and for every girl worth looking at there were 10 ugly, fat, and/or old women taking up space.
if by some miracle a girl my age showed up alone or with one other girl and I had the opportunity to engage, we'd have a good conversation, maybe even touch and hug a bit, but it would ultimately go nowhere. I believe the closest I got was a 30-something Latina who showed up alone and sat next to me, who after an hour of talking started hinting at a hookup or something but I was afraid and tried to get her number instead, which upset her and she declined.

I decided the cost and drinking simply isn't worth it. it's just a matter of time before I got into shit drinking so much. There must be another way. I'm signing up for dance again but that starts next month. Until then I need to do something else, but what?

There's a girl who I'm not sure if she likes me or not. A few people who I have spoke to said based on interactions/messages there's a good chance she is interested. She has only initiated texting a few times, otherwise I have to always initiate. Sometimes she holds a text conversation really well and others she seems neutral/doesn't continue the conversation on.

I initiated the last conversation, and thought I'd wait to see if she initiates the next conversation. Its been nearly a week and I haven't heard anything. Do girls wait for guys to text first usually? Or is it a sign she isn't actually interested? I don't want to hassle her if she isn't interested..

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how to be extrovert if you were introvert for 24 years of your life?

introversion is in my bones and genes now, i just can't let it go.

I hate that you can't show any weakness to women. That all we're just meant to be emotionally-dead ubermensch. Whenever women show concern for me now, I know that it's not sincere and just a shit-test, and I'm forced to keep silent about my problems. No wonder why so many dudes have psychologically repressed issues.

>>31627428
>I hate that you can't show any weakness to women

ummm anon you can.....

no one is stopping you

>>31620441
Selling yourself is way different than selling your startup and closing contracts, anon. You might be fumbling that big time.
Also nobody cares about your dick size if they haven't seen it. Nobody cares about how much you bench or how you bench so why you list these things as a positive might clue us on how you are unable to properly see what's actually valuable about yourself and how you come across to others. It just makes me roll my eyes. That should be your starting point.

>>31627556
Oh sure you CAN, but don't expect them to respect you or desire you afterwards.

>>31624881
>maybe first start socializing a bit more with guys / girls regardless
yeah that's just the same advice but again. I admit I never made it apparent but my problem isn't women, it's people. I have hard times trying to talk to anyone

>>31627428
>>31627700
The irony is that if you're a low-impulse control thug with anger issues, that's fine. Women will accept "masculine" character defects. But if you show any sort of vulnerability, major ick.

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>be me
>walk down the street
>crossing the street
>catch a girl side eyeing me
>lock eyes

Was she interested in me? This has never happened to me before

>>31627578
>Nobody cares about how much you bench or how you bench
I think that a lot of people are misunderstanding why I listed my lifts, I was trying to get across I'm a guy with a modicum of fitness and a bit of muscle. As someone else pointed out those lifts are in fact pretty mid, I really want to add about 100 lbs to each of those numbers but I'm focusing on losing weight right now
>might clue us on how you are unable to properly see what's actually valuable about yourself and how you come across to others
The truth is I guess I don't know what's valuable about myself, inherently. I have trouble believing people in general have an "inherent value." My worldview has always been you're only what you make of yourself, you're only as good as what you can achieve.
That being said my self-esteem is definitely at rock bottom. My breakup was over half a year ago but I'm still fucking shattered. I saw my ex getting dolled up and cleaned up to see her new guy a few times while I was in the process of moving out of our old place, basically just to go fuck him overnight.
This was after years of our sex life being so shit that she joked about being an "asexual girlfriend." This was after years of her coming home, stinking after going to the gym, and not wanting to shower before coming to bed with me because she was "too lazy" and wanted to shower in the morning before work instead. AND GUESS WHERE SHE MET THE GUY SHE'S DATING NOW?
She's putting in more effort for that new guy that she did for me for years, and we were fucking engaged. I feel fucking worthless if I'm being quite frank. She got into a new relationship so fast and even though I have all these things going for me I haven't been able to find anyone after over six months.
I'm not even really looking for a relationship right now, I don't really want to be tied down, but it'd be nice to feel wanted, to not feel like I'm a failure of a man and not desirable and feel like no woman wants me.

I am attractive enough to hold a woman's attention but i am autistic as fuck which ruins everything while they expect me to be a chad-lite.
How do i deal with this.

>>31623510
don't worry same thing happened to me in grade 10 but i got my first gf in grade 12 and then had a long term gf beginning from second year of university. you'll make it

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is this book good?

Thoughts on dating a friend's ex? We all met around the same time, we were flirty before they started dating, but I had some reservations about where she was at (she just broke off her engagement before moving in with her sister and BIL to start uni in our town) and had another girl I was interested in at the time. It's been about 3 months since they broke up and we're back to being flirty and touchy when we see each other (I'd say we were still verbally flirty when they were dating but obviously the touchiness stopped) but I'm still hesitant.

>>31630061

haven't read it but I generally view anything that has the words 'alpha male' in it as clickbait and is probably shit

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I know shes just being nice but is there a smart way to answer this that could benefit me in the future or do I go for the canned "thanks, and good luck" message?
we are both photographers so I though about just saying
>i understand, it was good getting to know you too, i'll be posting most of my pictures on my ig @xxx in the future. good luck with your relationship!

>>31631049
>"lol k"

all you need

Should I go out or should I stay in. I've successfully cut back on drinking, but if I go out I'll probably have a couple. I already made plans with friends to go out tomorrow night and Friday. I know I'll have some then.have a couple then.

>>31631049
>I know shes just being nice
As someone who's heard a lot of girls "just being nice", her post is considerably more sincere than that.
She's literally saying that she was interested in you and would like to continue to interact with you in a strictly platonic way. Her appreciation of you is likely sincere.

>is there a smart way to answer this that could benefit me in the future
The goal is to remain on her periphery. You want to at a point where if you message her about something, it isn't a big surprise that you'd contact her. But you don't want regular contact where she can pin you down into the "strictly platonic" level she currently wants you at.

And the next step is key: Move the fuck on.
Put no more thought or effort on her than is necessary to keep on her periphery. She should only be on your periphery as well.
All apologies if you already knew that.

Your reply seems pretty solid.

>>31628266
>i am autistic as fuck which ruins everything while they expect me to be a chad-lite.
>How do i deal with this.
Possibilities include seeming less autistic and lowering their expectations
You can seem less autistic by developing simple conversation tricks and practicing talking with people to learn cues, signs, and what works and what doesn't.
Essentially, git gud

https://youtu.be/blSXTZ3Nihs?si=NIJmhGZ9xAVJaXID

Lowering their expectations is an extension of what I've said about not hiding inexperience.
If they like what they see, they project their imagined idea of you onto you.
It's like imagining a sexy hot girl eating an ice cream cone is great at blow jobs. Reality may differ.

So, they are attracted and therefore expect you to be charming. And then you're not. So provide them a *reason* that you're not at your best. There's dozens and you can select ones that aren't unrelated to the truth.
Like maybe you've been out of the game for a bit because of family crap, maybe you just lost a ton of weight and aren't used to attracting girls as hot as her, maybe you recently suffered a head injury. I don't know you or what'd work well with the reality of your life.

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>>31630061
>>31630073
>haven't read it but I generally view anything that has the words 'alpha male' in it as clickbait and is probably shit
This.

The whole Alpha/Beta thing was wildly misinterpreted, could only loosely be applied to people, and most people missed the point that "beta" males actively bred all the time.

It's better to succeed at being the best version of yourself than try being what you or others imagine an alpha male is like.

>>31627428
>I hate that you can't show any weakness to women.
You can and still retain their respect.

>That all we're just meant to be emotionally-dead ubermensch.
100% untrue. You're throwing the baby out with the bathwater.

>Whenever women show concern for me now, I know that it's not sincere and just a shit-test, and I'm forced to keep silent about my problems.
Okay, here's the thing: What women are showing concern?

Because there is a HUGE FUCKING WORLD of difference between:
A. an acquaintance crying over his problems and then, presumably later, asking you out
vs.
B. Your boyfriend confiding his troubles to to and seeking comfort in your arms.

There's only one unfair rule about showing weakness to women: You're not allowed to be weak when they need you to be strong. So if tragedy hits both of you at once, you're supposed to be strong when they're weak and if you're not, then that's somehow a failure. It's unfair but it seems consistent.

It's also consistent that bfs share their emotions with gfs all the time and they find it attractive while nobody finds the stranger guy crying alone on the bus to be sexy.
Context matters, anon.

>No wonder why so many dudes have psychologically repressed issues.
Okay, this is valid. The inaccessiblity of emotional outlets for men is definitely a cause of many issues.

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>>31627204
I'm an extroverted introvert.

You don't have to change who you are. You just have to interact with others on a pleasant way in reasonable doses. You don't have to be the life of the party in order to enjoy a party.

There's leaving your shell and then there's leaving your shell.
Pic related

>>31631859
Yep solid advice and that was what I was already thinking. she has my IG now while i muted her number and deleted all the texts. whether she actually sticks around or not doesnt matter. but if she does change her mind im easy to get to.

on to the next one

>>31621893
>He doesn't know about the female side of the internet

Where do women even hang out? All the places I go are male dominated or 50/50 ratio at best

>>31632338
>50/50 ratio at best
What exactly are you looking for? And why?
You don't need to be surrounded by mostly women.

Go to a male strip club. It should mostly be women there.

How do you guys decide what women to actually date? I've never had a gf, but have dated a couple girls in the last year and a half. I met one that I was super into and could be considered 'the one', but for reasons it didn't work out.

I never felt as strongly for the girls I was seeing afterwards, until recently when I started seeing a girl that I would consider like 80 percent the way there. For other reasons it didn't work out, but I'm wondering if I should have dated her for real if I got the chance.

Are all the girls you put effort into the one that you would consider to wife up? Or you do develop strongly feelings later on? Imo I kinda know straight away. I'm getting older so it's something I am thinking about. Curious about other people's thoughts on this.

>2 months in with gf and we're exhausted on couch chilling
>asks what things I want by the time im 30 next year
>mentioned moving out and putting my savings into use finally
>mention that I just despise renting and couldn't see myself doing it (alone)
>she interprets this as me saying I'd never budge on that and I've now got messages from her pretty much spelling out how our mindsets don't align etc
We've pencilled in time to speak about it properly this weekend, but how am I meant to convince her of being for things down the road, do I? She has a 12YO child and has been sustaining them both and obviously wants the support of a partner - but she challenges my admittedly lax mindset at the time. I've growing up to do in regards to thinking forward with my situation (been at home a while), but I find it hard to go into a discussion about this when she's now so alarmed in what I've said because she doesn't want to waste time while our mindsets might be differing via maturity. It isn't like she's gotten the ick, but she's concerned about making things serious when they were about to be because of me strongly wording something that gave her no feeling of security on my end in the moment.

If a girl proposes a proper chat about things but continues to talk about it and doubt you via messages wtf do you even do?

>>31633378
>am i ugly?
Nope.

>what should i change to get women
For one, your low effort approach if you'd ever consider using that pic on a dating site. Do you have the self awareness to identify what is wrong with the pic, not the guy in it?

I will say that I appreciate the slight smile instead of the deadeye emotionless death mask look many people post.

Alright, I want to get over a girl that rejected me in the shittiest way possible and I really need a rebound and find a girl so I can get over her. Where should I go at this point? (forget the church memes) I've been looking into maybe going to music venues/bars any other places I should consider other than online or dating apps? I really just want to back out there and get into it any advice would help.

>>31633243
>If a girl proposes a proper chat about things but continues to talk about it and doubt you via messages wtf do you even do?
The most important thing about leading up to conversation is expressing the mindset that you are taking her concerns seriously and want assure her but you aren't nervous yourself. You're not nervous because this is a miscommunication, your future together is solid, and you just need to iron this out.
If you're nervous, it means that you're worried she'll leave because she's not entirely wrong. So that's a bad impression.

The most important thing about the conversation is that you address how she FEELS. You need to make certain that you FIRST:
ACKNOWLEDGE AND ADDRESS THAT WHAT SHE'S FEELING IS ENTIRELY VALID.
Everything she's feeling is valid. Even stuff she feels based on wrong shit she's then misinterpreted. That's still valid emotion.
If you attempt to dismiss her feelings or concerns, you're invalidating them and her. You're dismissing and invalidating *her*.
If you do that, everything you say afterwards might be completely meaningless.

Second, apologize. An apology should include a statement of what you did that you regret and NOT include any explanation of why you did it. An explanation can seem like an attempt at an excuse. An example might be to say "I'm sorry that what I said caused you to be uncertain about our relationship...."*pause for response*

There's a philosophy that you should never apologize for something you might do again.
There's also a philosophy that you should never apologize as it shows weakness.
I can't advise you on how to live with those philosophies but they're not necessarily wrong, just not how I know how to function.

1/2

>>31633243
>>31633684
Third, explain how you actually feel and how you want to move forward. Don't bother defending yourself or your past actions unless you plan on setting a boundary about deliberately doing them again in the future. If you made a mistake, justifying it makes it seem like a position you feel you should remain in.
If you've been lax, complacent, and weren't really thinking about how your words would be interpreted by her, own that. If you plan to change that, tell her that. And clarify where the line is between the immaturity of the habits you grew into and your actual feelings for the future.
If you're not sure how to improve, it's okay to say that and ask for her support as you do.

Essentially, you aren't defending your past, you are assuring her that future will be different. You're giving her the opportunity to feel positively and secure about your relationship.
Making her feel this way often works and is large reason why abusers keep their partners despite facts and logic clearly indicate they won't change.
It really helps if logic and facts support your position though.

So:
Acknowledging her feelings validates her feelings.
Accepting responsibility for your actions validates your maturity and compassion.
Assuring her that the future will be different validates her hope and commitment to you.

Then you just gotta do better. Be mindful of how you affect her.

2/2

>>31632914
I spent a long time needlessly scrutinizing relationships that might exist in my head and I regret it.

Don't preemptively reject yourself or a relationship without giving it a try. You're never as smart as you think you are.
Also, a relationship that doesn't last can still provide extremely valuable life experience.

I *can* be very perceptive, at times. And that let me see details that I used to eliminate many girls before asking them out, but that wasn't a policy I now support. If a girl wants piles of kids and I don't want any, that doesn't mean that we can't date. If a guy is working in another city for 6 months before moving away, he can still date despite the relationship being on a timer.
You can date a girl without her being the one.

And I have personal experience with this.
My first gf had a couple issues. Ultimately, I realized that the woman I wanted to spend the rest of my life with needed to be intelligent and my gf wasn't intelligent enough to match me. I'm not sure if that's as important to me now, but it was a deal breaker at the time.
So I told her that I cared about her and was loving dating her but didn't feel like I was ever going to marry her. I was giving her the opportunity to not waste her time on me or to continue to date, knowing that we'd eventually break up. She was incredibly hurt at first but after a couple days she was actually grateful and we continued to date for several weeks until she got a big opportunity out of state and moved.

Essentially, don't wait for certainty to date.
Don't prejudge how things might go.
Take opportunities for positive life experiences.
If presented with a deal breaker, don't ignore it.

I generally approached girls accepting them as they are and if I enjoyed being with them, gauging compatibility. I proceeded forward until something upset the apple cart and we weren't compatible.
Eventually, I met a girl that didn't have any incompatiblities at all.

>>31633690
Bless you anon ill digest this and probably provide an update come Saturday, she has all but written me off and it seems like a defence mechanism but I'll not make light of it

>>31633845
>she has all but written me off and it seems like a defence mechanism
Yeah. It's likely a fear response and legitimate reaction to what she concluded from what she perceived of your words that poorly reflected your thoughts that weren't necessarily about what she wanted to know.
That's human communication for you.
>she asks a question
>expects a response
>you answer
>you're exhausted and not thinking
>she compares your response to her expectations
>she assumes you were thinking what she was
>she applies deeper meaning that makes sense if assumptions were true
>she makes conclusions based on all that
>she has emotional response to conclusions
>she responds to her emotions instead of your words
Many such cases

It's the same as anons expecting girls who like them to do A and when they do X instead they assume "it's over".

Also, 2 months in seems about right for wrinkles like this to pop up and she's fine to look to the future and what you're both expecting. That's natural and you want to be on the same page. But 2 months in is also very early to be getting serious or expect a serious relationship, depending on time spent together.

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Bad news for cold approach shills. The crazy thing is that this includes school and work too, which are typically considered warm approach. It's never been so over.

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>hit it off with girl over the course of a couple weeks
>she seemed interested, gave me positive signals
>asked her out, turned down
>shortly after she starts dating another guy
>see him with her one day
>he's actually fucking ugly, like unironically you would look at him and go yeah that's an unattractive guy
>not even just like genetically unfortunate like does not even take care of basic hygiene
>overweight, noticeably greasy and dirty hair, literally has a neckbeard
This is actually giving me a mental breakdown. The timing of everything means she literally weighed her options between me and this guy and this guy won. I'm not Chad Thundercock, but I take care of myself and I am attractive. I mean I get female attention, just usually not from the girls I'm into unfortunately. How the fuck am I supposed to deal with being cucked by a discord moderator? I an actually going insane over this. No, he's definitely not rich. How do you deal with this mentally?

got my 3rd rejection this week. Not feeling too good. Here's hoping the next one will go better

>>31634645
All advice is bullshit. Everything is arbitrary. Some people are singled out to suffer for no reason. The people that succeed like to justify their success by saying it's their doing.

>>31634396

Actual cold approaching is pure autism. That never works unless you're a legit silver-tongued male model. What happens is that a girl gives you a hint, a sign, an invitation to approach. If she doesn't it's completely retarded to approach

>>31635534
>never works unless you do it 1000 times and are fine with the 0.1% success rate with very mentally ill women
FIFY

>>31635534
this. but you have to understand that women's hints are very subtle because they are (literally) pussies. oftentimes it's just consistent eye contact, which can be easy to misjudge. the more you catch her looking at you, the more likely it is she's into you. if she wasnt, she would still notice that you're looking at her but she wouldnt look back.
>>31634645
women are retarded and the truth is that it's a numbers game, you just have to spam irl approaches until something works.

>>31635571
the success rate is probably closer to 1 in 5, for me at least, which is higher than basically any other form of approach in our hypergamous gynocentric society

>>31635072
hang in there anon, it's their loss

>>31634396
>>31635534
Cold approaching strangers is fantastic practice for flirting. Absolutely amazing. There's zero investment and it goes poorly, you fuck off and you never have to see each other again.
My date return on cold approaching investment is abysmally low. Less than a fraction of a percent. But a large majority of my cold approaches have gone very well.

>What happens is that a girl gives you a hint, a sign, an invitation to approach. If she doesn't it's completely retarded to approach
If you sit on your ass waiting for a girl to signal you, you'll be waiting a long ass time. All you need is an icebreaker. Anything to say that's immediately relevant and might lead to further conversation. My last one was key lime pie.
But yeah, without an icebreaker it's awkward as fuck and completely retarded. I've done it.

>>31635585
>the success rate is probably closer to 1 in 5
How are you defining success here?

>>31635609
>My date return on cold approaching investment is abysmally low. Less than a fraction of a percent. But a large majority of my cold approaches have gone very well.

wut? yeah no, I'm good thank dawg

>>31635585
1/5 is unheard of really. You're either extremely handsome, in which case it doesn't matter what you do, or you're capping out of your ass

>>31634645
Feelings are often based on other feelings. You'd be surprised how often women choose worse men over better men because the worse guy vaguely triggers feelings of similarities with her father.
Sometimes there is nothing you could have done and bad luck fucks you over.
As bad as this feels, it'll be nothing to you years from now. Try to take the L and move on.
People often act stupid and that includes attractive women you like.

>>31635616
>>31635623
I should probably clarify, i dont do straight up cold approach as in walking up to strangers on the street. im in university, which makes it much easier, and my strategy is to just end up in rooms with attractive women with whom i share some kind of interest, strike up a conversation with one of them, ask them for their number and then text them the next day to meet up for a date sometime. For example, the last girl I dated I met at a drinks event for my major's club, and did exactly what I just laid out. So the girl is still a stranger, but i'm not exactly some random joe off the street either.

>>31635598
Sometimes I wish women were more honest about why they reject you. Constructive criticism could help me do better/avoid something next time

How much grace will a girl give you to keep fucking up with flirting if she likes you?

>>31635619
Well, like I said, I use it primarily for flirting and I did it a lot while I was still clueless. I wasn't not waiting for a likely win. It's fucking practice, not the main event.

>>31635650
That's still a very good rate, but it makes it more believable at least. Just approaching women, with no intial sign of interest from her, on the street or wherever is actually so socially oblivious that it's literal weaponised autism. I find it funny because it bothers women so much but if you're doing it in hopes of getting laid or a relationship... yeah

>>31635650
I don't think it's really considered cold approaching if it's at a social event. That's just meeting a stranger a social event.
If you did it at random in a university building hallway, that'd count. That's how I got one of my dates.

But still, that's a successful rate. Excellent work.

>>31635655
It's directly proportional to how much she likes you versus how much you are fucking up.
Plus some girls are extra tolerant and polite. Like the hero cashier in that Baby Cakes Wizards clip.

>>31635666
yeah i agree with you about actual cold approaching. In my experience irl with strangers is still the best way to go though, the dating apps don't work for me, and trying to turn a female friend into a gf basically never works, it always ends in disaster. in fact i would say never be friends with women at all, the dynamic is just you giving them what they want from a relationship (male attention) without them giving you what you want in return (love and sex). what incentive do they have to change that dynamic? None
>>31635693
thanks, i appreciate it.

>>31635666
>Just approaching women, with no intial sign of interest from her, on the street or wherever is actually so socially oblivious that it's literal weaponised autism. I find it funny because it bothers women so much
The first rule is that at the first sign of her being disinterested, you smile and fuck off.
Also, you don't start swinging with hitting on her. You break the ice, build rapport, flirt, and then close the deal (I'm admittedly less practiced at the last step)

>>31635719
>i would say never be friends with women at all, the dynamic is just you giving them what they want from a relationship (male attention) without them giving you what you want in return (love and sex). what incentive do they have to change that dynamic? None
The trick to being friends with women is to, wait for it, actually treat them like friends.
Are you friends with guys because you want love and sex from them?
Similarly, if a girl treats her male friend like an emotional tampon or a sexless neutered bf, then she's not being a friend.

My best female friend for ten years was a great example. She asked me to "help" her move which involved me moving most every heavy thing myself. Then she bought me pizza and beer and we relaxed, shot the shit, and hung out. Her nickname for me was "dirty fucker". Friends.

>>31635585
>the success rate is probably closer to 1 in 5

same here.

I’m thinking of asking out a girl I haven’t talked to in 4 years and only met briefly. We were introduced by a mutual friend and were planning on going to prom together but covid happened and we drifted apart. I still have her added on social media. What’s a good way to approach, and how soon in the convo should I ask her out?

>>31628187
>Was she interested in me? This has never happened to me before
you'll never know now; when you see something like that you have to move quickly and find out.

I don't even feel the same emotions when I'm at work that I do at home, I think I might be so fucking depressed that I have "emotional numbing" or something.

It makes it extremely difficult to speak to some girl at work.

>dating gf for two months
>everything is going so smooth
>always tells me how much she likes me and how much fun shes having, i make her feel special
>meeting eachothers friends and families
>sees me 3 times a week and always spends the night despite having 3 jobs
>go out last night with all of our friends
>people making jokes at us telling us to get a room because of how close we are
>friends leave and text me "dude that girl is big into you man, she's in love for sure,"
>really good sex
>initiates plans
>wants to show me off to people
>jokes about sitting next to me at company meetings and says she doesn't care who knows or if its obvious

and I am still paranoid about getting hurt or fucked over. It literally terrifies me.
I got cheated on in my last LTR and I go through phases were its like "nah man everything is going so well right now and I should just be stoked," and then "i'm gonna get my heart broken, there's something else going on,"

I don't know how to stop over thinking shit and let the fuck go man..

>>31637668
just never get attached to her

>>31621948
This is the women board. kek

>>31621893
It exists, just not here

>be me
>ex broke up with me due career conflicts and meeting up at different moments in our lives, i was just starting up life after graduating while she's 3 years older and having a great job making bank, tried to make something work out, we failed
>she moved into a relationship 2 months after that, recently broke up with him, texted me that she missed me after 2 years of no contact
>i m in a better position now, still trying to move forward with my career, i'm not at the entry-level anymore
>no meeting yet, brought that up in a convo for one saturday but we've posponed that, we live in different cities now
>next sunday she had some issues with her pet, dropped me pictures, videos of her going to vet
>trying to be there for her as much as i can, dropped her 2 messages about her situation and if i can help with something, trying to cheer her up and support her
>short and late replies on monday, pet is feeling better, pet is back home the next day
>messages left on delivered for almost 2 days yet she's online
>have i been ghosted/used for getting over her ex or am i reading too much into this one?

>>31620246
------------------------------------
IGNORE THESE THREADS
COME TO /f/it
PUA SCAM THREAD
-----------------------------------------

>>31638072
I already post in /roon/

I have a jacuzzi at home. How do I use it to get laid?

>>31620441
youre either severely ugly, autistic, lying, or all of it
i would assume all of it since you unironically posted your lifts and your fucking dick size as if anyone gives a shit let alone for a first date

>>31638124
I will be the first to admit I am severely autistic. IDK about ugly, I think I'm at least average and have had girls confused as to why I was hitting on them because they thought I was out of their league. Could be though.
All I know is that I'm definitely not lying, was trying to prove a point I have all this stuff going for me that should make me "attractive" and yet I'm dying of thirst.
>your fucking dick size as if anyone gives a shit
Don't be mad, dicklet

>>31621893
Step 1: Spread legs
CONGRATULATIONS YOU NOW HAVE A MAN

Working through;
Finding places and opportunities to meet women, and getting over past bs mentally. Numbers game only made me feel worse, like there's something wrong with me, everyone knows, and no one wants to say it.

>>31620246
Saw probably the most attractive woman earlier in my rearview mirror.

Threw my sunglasses off and tried to stare. She turned off, I was considering drifting into the other lane to go look at the sonic for her.

Judged a low probability of success due to not knowing exactly where she went and continued on to the gym.

Also there was a supremely hot athletic blonde at Starbucks.

>>31638801
Do you remember her license plate? You can use that to find out her name and where she lives

>>31638822
Lol find your own

1. lower your standards. fuck the opinions of other people, and in some cases fuck your own opinion... just try to connect and be nice.
2. HAVE A PERSONALITY.
3. ???
4. profit.

yall are overthinking this

>>31625708
GO TO A THERAPIST

>>31620246
What's the consensus on the double text? Girl from Hinge. She actually gave me her number before I could even ask. We texted fairly regularly for a few days but I couldn't meet up because I was busy.
The other day we were texting and I asked if she still wanted to go to the conservatory this weekend (which is what she suggested earlier in the conversation) and she hasn't messaged back since

Is it always worth at least one double text just to make sure she wasn't genuinely busy or missed the text?

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Ok, I have successfully lookmaxxed, women are very receptive and welcoming to my presence, and I can see when randos are into me on the streets, but it was a long way here. I'm 30 now and up until about 27 I was invisible, not gonna sob story, but now even though I've got the potential, my self esteem does not match, I have virtually zero self esteem and honestly do not fucking see what they are, how the fuck do I get over this final hurdle, I can just tell it's my last mental hurdle I've got, but again at 30 I don't exactly have all the time in the world

>>31639696
now it's personality / self-esteem maxx time and with the looks this is gonna be the most fun time. i'd recommend starting to visualize women being into you for a start. literally practice it in the comfort of an empty room. eventually you'll start to adjust your self-esteem thermometer to fit these implanted Inception style memories

also make lists. a list of reasons why you might deserve a woman, etc. anything you can do to magnetize your brain to the kinds of thoughts someone with self-esteem would have

>>31639696
self-esteem is downstream of accomplishing important things eg fucking women
fake it till you make it is my advice.

>>31638801
anon, this reminds me of one time i saw an absolute stunner jogging on the road while i was driving. i thought: "what am i gonna do, pull over and try to talk to her? ridiculous!" and now that it's years later, in retrospect, the thought was: yep, that's exactly what i should have done. if nothing else it'd be a memory

>>31639706
My personality is fine too, I make friends very easy and get invited to a lot of things by a lot of people, it's impossible to say that shit without humblebragging, but people like me (again due to low self esteem, I don't get it) I'm fairly confident in all aspects of my personality but the romantic

>>31639716
Yeah I feel like it's a 90 degree angle cliff I"m trying to climb

>>31639738
you ignored everything i said about self-esteem and concentrated on the thing i said that you perceived as threatening to your ego. i guess i asked for that.

anyways, self-esteem is a habit like any other. literally practice it in the ways i suggested and you'll be good, anon. and congrats on the looksmaxxing. what exactly did you do to get yourself the mires?

>>31639749
I didn't ignore it at all, I'm just not gonna comment on every piece of the post if I have no commentary on it lmao, I didn't ignore your points, don't worry

>>31639749
>>31639766
I stepped the fuck up on my fashion sense, I keep old pics of myself to remind myself of my progress, and what the fuck was I doing back then.

Changed up my hair, got some glasses, that's about it to be honest. For the fashion I got more form fitting clothes and styles that better suit me and hyper focused on those, I also honed in on colors that compliment me well.

>>31639766
and there you ignored my questions. shut up anon i don't believe you

>>31639771
lol i spoke too soon. i'm sorry anon

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>>31639772
>>31639777
S'all good my man

>>31620246
How can I stop putting hot people on a pedestal? I'm intimidated by them and inherently think they are better than me

I have no trouble getting girls to be interested in me, but I struggle to turn it into sex. What am I missing?

>>31640002
Escalation
Isolate her and start slow untill you're kissing her neck
Yeah I know it sounds predatory if you've been listening to fememeists for years but that's exactly how it works

>>31639716
How do you fake self esteem or confidence? Legitimate question. Some would say muhh don't fake it you need irl experience but I'm late 20s virgin and I HAVE to hide it and appear confident, imagine entering a workforce st 45 years old with 20 year olds and telling your boss you don't have a clue on how to do your job.

Alright serious question;
Do you ALWAYS need to get choosing signals from women in order to start flirting or talking to them at all, or can you change their mind from neutral to positive in some way?
I don't usually look at them first to avoid creeping the fuck out of them since that's not usually what strangers do here, but I'm wondering if saying hi or something nice/cool would shift their mood if I'm not the most beautiful piece in the world.
I am aware of the fact that looking good will attract looks from women and I do get that on a rare occasion but I'm not a chad, though I look better than probably half the men around me which isn't much but still good.

>>31640015
Any tips on how to escalate?

>>31630071
Bump

>>31640168
You have to read her well
Start with the mood
> Hug herz touch her hand, arm or whatever
> She's alright with it
> Start moving to more intimate zones like waist
> She's uncomfortable
Drop to lower gear and do what she was previously alright with untill you feel like you can escalate more

>>31640069
From what I've experienced, women usually are reserved with men they don't know unless she's ovulating and you're gigachad's older brother and if they have to talk to you they'll act professional and avoid personal questions etc, joking or just being pleasant to be around gets them to open up more and they start telling themselves something like "well he's handsome, intelligent, he has a nice voice" etc

>27, KHV, get pegged as early 20s by people generally
>Skinny
>Long wavy hair
>friends say I'm hot and are confused as to why I've never had a gf
>last relationship was 6 years ago and it was an LDR so I never met the person anyway
>99% sure I'm autistic

So is autism damning me to solitude? Since my "stats" suggest I should have had sex a long time ago but I haven even held hands.

Am I just fucked?

>>31620246
Bros never go for Chink females. One of my biggest regrets in life. Japanese, Koreans, Southeast Asians, etc... are better.

The biggest blackpill is that you shouldn't waste your time talking to women who play games. Then you realize that everything around you is trash. The faster you realize that, the better. Once you begin treating them like trash, that's when you will get what you deserve out of them, but of course they are trash so you will look elsewhere for gems.

>>31640568
Here's a hint: a woman who is texting you and is unavailable is playing games. Having time for them is foolish. Tell them to go suck a dick.

>>31640569
Ans the one and only diversion for men is self improvement. Gym and financially. Always self improve to the extent that no woman would dare to play games with you.

Can anyone give me a tldr on how take half decent selfies?
I've never taken a photo of myself, pretty sure that there's no photo in existence of me past elementary school (if I disappeared tomorrow they'd have to fucking use security footage to get my face which is kinda fun to think about lol)
Want to make a social media profile, just need 1 not horrible selfie...

>>31620959
>fat
There it is. Today's dating climate is harsher to fatties than any time before it. Once you lose enough weight I bet things'll change a bit. Until that happens, you're just hoping to chsnce fat not being a turn off ehich it is for like 80% of people.

>>31640568
>>31640569
But I like women who play games, they're more fun when you know how to use their tricks against them, also playing games with them makes it more interesting

>>31638953
Help pls

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Are shorts ever okay for a first date? I have a first date tomorrow night and I was thinking of wearing this. It’s going to be 90 degrees outside for our date. Thoughts?

>>31620246
240 useless treads for retards that can't accept one simple fact: JUST BE ATTRACTIVE
People who get women do it naturally if you have to ask it's over

>>31640883
Are YOU attractive anon?
Do YOU get women "naturally"?

>>31620927
Do you have paid accounts for dating apps? You should have the money for it.
Do talk about texts a lot, but that's very old-school. Do you have an. insta account? If you have trouble finding and connecting to girls, you should.

I'm gonna need some help, there's a hot chick in her late 30s probably working at the drug store and I really wanna hit on her without a lot of expectations, all i I need is flirting. She's kinda classy and mannered mote compared to other women in this town. Any advice would be appreciated

I think I'm unironically too nice to attract a woman. If I like someone, I want to be kind and thoughtful . I'm not talking about being a pushover or anything. But I just can't get into the whole "treat them like dirt, stick like mud" philosophy. I know it works for certain guys, but that ain't me.

>>31639696
The best way to establish positive self esteem is to finish what you start.

>>31641347
> treat them like dirt, stick like mud
You don't, if you're nice be nice and assertive in the cult leader/preacher way lol

>>31641347
You don't have to treat them poorly, just don't treat every girl nice just for showing up.
Have some copypasta:

I wrote some advice a while back for guy who kept failing as a supportive guy and asked if he should act like the jerks he saw getting laid:

NO.
Those guys are acting the way they act.
You would be acting like how you perceive those guys act to the best of your ability to act like someone who you are not, in a specific manner, while simultaneously trying to get to know a girl and respond with natural attraction.
Do you see the difference?

Putting on an act and pretending to be someone else is a bad idea.
The problem, I guess, is the supportiveness. Withhold your supportive nature until she is hooked. Don't tell her about you being supportive of other womeneither. (Being supportive of weaker beings that aren't her peers is actually a really good thing)
If she sees you will support anyone, she isn't special. If a person doesn't need to work for the reward (your support) it *feels* less valuable. That's a human nature thing and partly why hazing is done. You want her to feel like *she* can get your attention and support, if she puts in a little effort.

You want to fuck her.
That isn't a question. You may be perfectly willing to match her enthusiasm and pace but you are always pushing the edge for a little more because you want to fuck her.
You can be polite, kind, and gentle, but as you politely sit next to her as she tells you about her family you want to fuck her.
You always want to fuck her.
When you kiss her, you want to keep on kissing her. You want to fuck her at the end of the first date. You want to fuck her at the *beginning* of the first date.
You don't try to, because you respect her. But you push for it.
You push closer. You touch her. You inch closer to her mouth. You can't fuck her right then, but you want to fuck her.

Waiting until she greenlights you to show her how much you desire her is backwards.
Hungry men get fed.

>>31640872
Depends where you are going for the date. I live in a warm climate also and pretty much everyone is in shorts for outside dining. And most of the places are outside or casual dining. If it's at night somewhere inside that is a fine dining establishment then shorts would be unacceptable. But, I wouldn't go to a first date at one of those special occasion type of places. I'm talking $60+ main entrees and all sides are a la carte. And even in some of those places people still wear shorts.

I use to like to try and plan first dates for right after work though so then I would just wear my work clothes (dress slacks, dress shirts), but with the pandemic I'm now remote so that's not an option.

>>31641451
I live in Florida and I pretty much wear shorts at all times except when going to the nicest of places. Other than the shorts, would you change anything?

>>31637954
You are definitely being used as an emotional crutch/rebound to get over the last guy she was fucking
This is pretty typical female behavior, they leave you, then things fall apart with the new guy, their ego takes a hit and they start looking for the validation of being wanted again. A lot of times they don't even need things to escalate to sex, just getting your attention as she did is enough for them.
Sorry to say this dude but it was the wrong move breaking no contact. If she does end up replying you need to make it clear that you want to meet up, with romantic intentions, soon.
Also it's really really hard for regular dudes to get girlfriends these days, between competition from other thirsty guys and how entitled women are it's downright brutal, but two years is long enough that you should have found something serious again and not be fucking around trying to get your ex back. This is coming from a guy who right now would probably drop everything to run back to his most recent ex.

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The biggest bluepill recently I had on height/looks not mattering is that one of my friends is:
>6ft 6in
>conventionally unattractive (other than height I guess) with weird face
>not rich
>no muscle to speak of
>socially a rather awkward/clumsy
And yet has been in a couple of long-term relationships, and is currently in what looks like a long-term happy and stable one.

Not really sure how he does it, but I'm 6ft 1in and I struggle. I figure it's more of a mental game than anything else.

>>31641659
Because he's taller than you.

>>31640847
Me too :) it's waaay more satisfying to get them in bed if you have to work for it a bit

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>>31641682
NTA, but once you reach a certain height it becomes a disadvantage. Often it comes with weird proportions, oddly skinny limbs, posture problems, etc.
By pic related, a 6ft 6in guy is acceptable at an equivalent rate to a 5ft 5in guy.
Optimal height is around 6ft-6ft 2in.

>>31641753
Is 5'11 pretty much the same as 6? I look like I'm 6 foot tall if it makes sense unless I'm standing right next to someone who's actually 6 foot

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So what the fuck are women attracted to because it sure as hell isnt me.

I dont think im ugly I can find guys to hook up with when I want faggotry easy as fuck I just have zero idea how to rizz up girls and Ive literally never had one try to hit on me.

>>31641494
NTA, but I would change to no-show socks. You are only a few steps away from becoming Spongebob

>>31641815
Are the socks really that bad? I thought they add a splash of color to a pretty bland outfit

How to find a good balance in giving her attention? On the one hand I feel like I want to text / see her every day, but I guess that could also turn them off if you do it to much, so how to find a good balance in this?

>>31641748
Yeah you're coping

Figured out I was attractive cause women are very kind to me, while rando dudes acts with aversion. No one gives me shit for the anime pins I got on my bag, in fact they inquire about it, and I've tried to start shit on twitter several times and no one ever comes after my looks, like ever.

Feelsgoodman

Super likes, yes or no? Are they try hard and cringe, or ok? I'm kinda just trying to get on dates ASAP to help move on after another girl but the ones I am matching with don't go anywhere just like regular likes so probably just a waste? At least it increases my match potential and therefore date potential?

I dont feel or act like this >>31642076
at all, and somehow I still think i come across as needy or desperate. How is my take it or leave it attitude not working for me?

Is my autism too strong? Where do I find a girl who will like me despite it, and actually have really high interest in me and not want to test me too hard? I have money, competence, hobbies, friends, looks and fitness, and started therapy a few months ago to begin fixing confidence and happiness. How long does it take? Or do I just need less male dominated hobbies?

What's a good way to respond to "make me laugh" or something on a hinge profile? Assuming nothing else on the profile is worth commenting on.

Is it ever okay to try and date someone from the gym?

>>31643583
Yes I've done it multiple times, as I've outlined in many of these threads. AMA

I was trying to take a girl to the symphony for a first date (I have a season pass) but she couldn't make it that day, but wants to see me again. Will it look complete ass if the next date I propose is way lower budget, like going to the park and getting some ice cream?

>>31643638
Nah it'll be a good test if she was actually interested in you or your expensive tickets.

>>31643629
How often have you tried and how often had it worked? Also is it people you see all the time in there that you're asking?

>>31641897
Lol, don't want to throw you off. If I were your shoes I'd wear shorter socks but either way looks good really.

>>31643679
>How often have you tried and how often had it worked?
See, right off the bat you make it sound like some "cold approach" cringe and that I'm asking people out left and right. Nah, you hit it off with someone, see them there a lot, build the rapport up and THEN ask them out.

>strategising how to get women

Youre never going to make it

>>31643734
Okay but how many times have you actually gone on a date with someone doing that

Been on two dates, haven't gone past second base yet
She used to text back within 2-3 hours max, now she responds once a day, sometimes up to 20 hours later. No difference in energy of response however
Am I officially on the back burner?

>>31643761
Yep time to move on

>>31643752
I'd have to think back over the years but I think about 5 women, out of 6 I asked. Pretty good batting average I'd say.
One I dated for a year and one is my current gf now.
Asking people out at the gym is really no different from doing it anywhere else. At the very least, it's better than the fucking grocery store and other autistic ideas I see people toss out on here all the time.

>>31643773
Actually no, subtract my current girl because I never really asked her out, we just started hooking up and recently made it official. So 4 out of 6.
The one who turned me down I mentioned in another recent thread. Still don't know what happened...thought I had a yes, until it became a no. We're still cool and I talk to her at the gym when I see her. I was thinking she might be leaning towards coming around but now I'm with this other girl, so guess that's that.

>>31643787
And how does it affect your gym? As in when you two break up do you two still see each other at the gym?

>>31643917
Why would that affect the gym? Yeah you might still see her...so what?
The woman I dated for a year for example. We both worked there, albeit in different departments. So yeah, we'll still each other there. So what? When we do bump into each other we'll say hi, how have you been?
Idk anon, you seem to have a really juvenile view of a lot of this stuff. Between thinking running into an ex has to be the worst thing in the world to thinking you're supposed to spam asking people out instead of letting it happen organically. How old are you if I may ask?
Now there was one other girl there I didn't mention. We liked each other once, now we don't (long story). But we never dated. Now her and I don't talk anymore, we basically just ignore each other. But this is the exception, not the rule. For me anyway. (she also works there)

>>31638334
>genuinely gets upset when called out on his dick size
this was serious advice kek. no girl gives a shit about your dick size on a first (or seriously any) date or dating profile, maybe unless youre only using pure hookup or kink shit like feeld or whatever its called. kick that shit out, its unironically why you cant get laid if you seriously brag about this in any context. show, dont tell

where do you even try to get dates? if you seriously have the money and socials, you should have decent, non-douchebag photos and more than enough money for hinge / bumble / tinder premium to get those matches and from there scoring a date is not really hard if you act like some normal person and talk about the most casual shit like holidays, what you do for work, etc.
a friend of mine recently pointed something out i never realized. girls are much more picky with matches and dates on average for obvious reasons, and thus if you got that they most likely already like you more than you like them. keep that in mind, if you got that far, you are already half-way there.
if this doesnt work, as in you dont even get matches with fucking premium subscriptions, there's something severely wrong with how you present yourself in your profile, or you ARE severely ugly (as in literally disfigured). you mentioned friends, have you ever asked them to check your dating profiles?
>inb4 "i dont use dating apps"
well then try them out and report back

>>31644030
>hinge / bumble / tinder premium
Nta but is this worth it if I have good income?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mUsbDbrZSJQ

for people who don't understand when others say "just be attractive," or why it's important to "just work on yourself"

I just talked to a girl for 4.5 hours
she has to wake up in like, 3 hours, but stayed on the phone with me anyway, just chatting about whatever

there's no way in hell she's not somewhat seriously interested right?
our conversation didn't have any particular sexual overtone, but I mean no way she'd talk this long to me if she wasn't interested...
btw she has a fucking boyfriend fml

>>31645016
Probably not. She's just using you for attention. Ghost her or start flirting and ask her to bang ASAP so you don't watmste time.

>>31620246
I'm turning 30 next month, and I'm a khhv who has never really tried to date. Is it too late to try and turn my nonexistent love life around?

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>the girls I want, don't want me
>the girls I don't want, want me

This is due to authenticity. It's something about our whole body and vibe changes when we communicate with a girl we do want to be with.
It's like playing around with your phone at your desk vs over a cliff; your nerves trigger.
Pretending or acting ruins authenticity.

I know I'm not the only one who experiences this.
There's got to be a way to bypass this simulation formula.

Can someone else answer this please?
>>31640069

How do I hit on short stacked women?

Is online dating just over? In 2018, 2019 when I was just finishing up with college, I could download Tinder and be driving to a girl’s apartment within the hour. Now I’m better looking, in better shape and have more money, but I can barely get a message back on Hinge. I deleted the apps, and I have no problem approaching women in real life, but most of them are boring as fuck and also on the apps themselves. How do I filter for better women aside from just looks?

Also, why do they always choose fugly women to put in the OP of these threads?

>>31620441
>According to you FUCKING MORONS I should be knee-deep in pussy. So where is it? What the actual fuck am I doing wrong?
Kek. You might have social issues. If I were wealthy like that, I would at least try to have sex with plenty of elite escorts. That would make me feel a lot better. Elite escorts in the US can easily cost $1000 or more, when just a few years ago, those same elite escorts were only charging $700. You say you pay yourself six figures, but there is a big difference between making $100,000 and $900,000 a year. Even if you make $300,000, after federal income taxes, that's only $213,000. Even with that kind of money, it would still be painful to pay for elite escorts on a regular basis. That shit costs more than cocaine.
(1/2)

>>31620441
>>31646361
If you wanted to afford a daily elite escorts and cocaine addiction, you'd need to be making at least $1,000,000 a year, which would be $643,000 after federal income taxes, and I would estimate that you'd be spending around $1000 a day for the elite escorts and between $200 and $300 for the cocaine. So this cost approximately somewhere between $438,000 and $474,000 a year. Personally, I'd skip the cocaine most of the time, but even with no coke, that's still $365,000 to have sex with an elite escort for one hour each day. Now, some of them are a bit cheaper, charging only $500 or even $400. Those elite escorts might be trying to increase their volume of clients, but this could also mean that she's more likely to have an STD, but I'm not an escort expert. I could easily withhold having sex with escorts to once every three days, but ideally once every two days, and these options would cost between $122,000 and $183,000, respectively. Obviously, you wouldn't want to burn up all your money on pleasure, so you'd want to keep a decent amount of your money reserved for other shit. Even with the option of visiting an elite escort once every three days with no coke, that would still be somewhere between $50,000 and $122,000 per year, with $50,000 only if you visit the cheaper elite escorts once every three days. That's still a pretty big chunk of your income after taxes. Now, you do get to save money on sales taxes when you pay for escorts.
(2/2)

Is it normal to feel empty after having thousands of hookups.

>>31634396
As GirlsChase once said the problem with these kinds of surveys is that men imagine being approached by some absolute knockout babe of their dreams while women imagine the absolute worst-case scenario where they are being approached by some stinky, creepy dude who can't even get two words out without mumbling. Since most guys aren't not quite that bad, it's actually a pretty easy hurdle to clear. Dress well, groom yourself well and act chill and you'll generally be fine.

>>31634396
Cold approach is generally retarded because it really means you start talking to someone without even looking at each other and looking like you're about to rob the person
Approaching needs context and isn't always literal. I was at a bar with my buddy and we were talking with the waiter when a girl who works nearby brought in old dishes and I started joking about it, she seemed to lighten up and liked me

>>31646845
>Cold approach is generally retarded because it really means you start talking to someone without even looking at each other and looking like you're about to rob the person

No, it's literally just saying "Hi" and going from there. What the fuck do you think cold approach is?

>>31620246
What if I get a gf and find out that I'm just fundamentally incapable of intimate relationships?

>>31626825
Reads to me like sam is getting jealous anon. She was the only "cute" girl there and probably feels threatened by the other new girls. Also females can be VERY conniving so she maybe trying to cock block you or indome weird way trying to get your attention all to herself. (I'm not an expert on women I dont know shit but this is how I feel about the situation)

Why does the girl at work flaunt that she got an STD?

Does she just want me to know she has STDs?

>>31647349
I mean she is fucking around with a guy that already has a GF while she has a BF and he doesn't give a fuck about her, obviously--so she is obviously a stupid whore, but still.

>>31647349
What std?

>>31647381
flu like symptoms and needed a "steroid shot" which means anti-viral for like herpes

for all I know she has awful genital herpes, but I would impregnate her anyway

men who get no attraction from women need to learn the lesson of the potato

https://www.youtube.com/shorts/IIhR_UZXTpc

are you potatomaxxing, anons? are you sending out signals that you're a high value vegetable? are you worth guarding? worth boyfriending?

think like a woman

be the potato

>>31644387
>"just work on yourself"

we're approaching that point as a collective where everything will eventually validate determinism. It's the elephant in the room. it's about phsyical traits.

>>31647400
yes it's true if you don't give them attention they will move themselves into your view for inspection

but just being more outgoing and personable is probably much more effective

come on women, you need me to screw your life up

Hello anons, guide, teach and help me make a choice
>girl is interested, not a single doubt in mind. most of the time saw her staring at me
>didnt make a move at first because of me being a pussy, and because she lived really fucking far away
>after months, stops staring at me. Doubt arises a little bit.
>not only that but, good news is she also moved to an apartment nearby the park i go to almost daily to exercise
>see this as an opportunity. got my shit together and approached to get to know her better
>"hey, i've noticed you take the same path as i do, let's go together"
>she accepts it, we have a good talk on her way home. Notice smiles and laughter from her.

After the first chit-chat we had, i felt comfortable approaching her. Before leaving class, i ask to go with her, so we can have a conversation going. I've already went out with her three times (the last one being yesterday).
However, i think i'm starting to realize that, she's indifferent to me. Almost like if it doesn't matter if i go out with her or not. i'm the only one who initiates conversation. if i don't say something to her, she doesn't say something either. That's in class of course, on the way out, there isn't even eye contact, or you know, ask if i'm going with her or something. Also, 2 out of three 3 times her friend was coming together, which makes it even harder to me to get to know her. I'm stuck talking about fucking projects and exams it sucks lol. I try to make it as funny as possible tho or else it gets boring quickly.
How should i go about this anons? Keep going with it or abandon the ship because she lost interest? Am i overthinking? Still being kinda of a pussy?

Either way, i don't think i'm losing in this situation. Have so many regrets in my life regards women that, failling at least once feels like victory. A win against the "what could have been" scenarios i put in my head. btw sorry for bad english, eslfag here.

>>31647438
The thing about posting here is there is not never information to really help. You'll have to figure it out on your own. If you like her and she keeps accepting then keep escalating. Maybe she is shy? Maybe she is insecure? Maybe she doesn't think she is a good texter? It could be something or it could be nothing. Great job on making the move and keep it up. Try to make more dates were you are alone with her and can get to know her better.

>>31644030
>where do you even try to get dates?
Cold approaching IRL. That last date I mentioned with the Chinese student was a girl I met at a library and asked out when I passed her randomly on the street while walking. I had already made up my mind I was gonna ask her out though
>you should have decent, non-douchebag photos and more than enough money for hinge / bumble / tinder premium to get those matches and from there
Nearly all of my photos from the last five years or so are from when I was with my ex and chubby. I can afford premium but I feel like it'd be a waste of money until I'm shredded enough to show off my body and actually compete with those 1% of men that do get matches. I also live in a west coast city with a notoriously shitty male to female ratio like (110 to 100 M:F)
This also sounds silly but I hate taking pictures of myself, or stopping the action of what I'm doing to take pictures. Maybe I'll have to change that. I'm going out tonight to shoot pool with some friends from grad school, maybe we'll take a group pic then. I also just have a habit of looking really goofy in pictures no matter what I do.
>you ARE severely ugly (as in literally disfigured)
I really don't think that's the case, I have been able to get women in the past, I've even been approached a few times. But ever since my breakup, IDK man, something is just wrong. Women psychically sense desperation, the fact that you don't love your life, low self-esteem etc. And my ex jumping into something new so fast before I could get over her, before we were even able to disentangle our lives, really broke me.
>you mentioned friends, have you ever asked them to check your dating profiles?
Yes, one of my friends who is pretty good with women called it a "good" profile, and my brother who gets more ass than a toilet seat called them decent (he's actually banned from tinder and bumble now tho lol)

>>31646361
>>31646362
I'm stock rich and cash "poor" right now. I pay myself between $120k-$150k a year right now, which is ok but I don't have millions in the bank in cash, just in the shares of my startup. No way I could afford an escort habit like that until a liquidity event.
I've also dabbled in prostitutes in the past anyway and don't really want to do it again. I'm too paranoid about STDs and about being blackmailed (my startup hold gov't contracts).
I'm not against the idea of sugaring though, if I can't find another girl to eventually get engaged to and wife up being a sugar daddy would be kind of lit

>>31647594
I don't trust those escort sites at all. It's not even about the money. Bait and switch, some weird girl who takes your money, information getting leaked like you said. Way too paranoid to go that route.

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>>31625307
I love you gang.

Matched with a cute girl on Tinder, we texted some, exchanged IG and texted through the day.

Before exchanging Instagrams i asked her out, but she told me she visits her family and won't be back in town until Wednesday. Is it fine if we stop texting for few days and then i will return with the topic until then or should i try to keep her engaged until we meet for the first time?

>>31647841
give her the gift of missing you and wondering what you're up to, whether you have other dates lined up, etc

>>31647871
It won't work, they don't know each other. I'd keep contact with her but not be overly needy and ask her out again before she comes back

>>31646365
>Is it normal to feel empty after having thousands of hookups.
"The thing about lots of meaningless sex is that it's...meaningless."

>>31647438
My take:

>>after months, stops staring at me
>months
You "passively rejected" her.
You had the opportunity to ask her out and she wasn't attractive enough to you to compel you to asked her out.
Now you're back.

It's like when anons here post about how they were talking to a girl, she disappears,and then suddenly returns. Anons insist it's because she dropped you to chase Chad, failed, and is now reconsidering her second choice.

You've made her feel like she wasn't worth asking out before and that has tainted your interest in her now. She's likely concerned that you don't "really" find her attractive. Now, she's worth bothering with which means before she wasn't, which means you were "rejecting" her. Yes, women sometimes think like this.

This is another example of what I talk about when I say that letting women imagine their own reasons for your actions is a mistake.

My advice is to proceed forward and ask her out, maybe early on in the date mention how you wanted to before but got nervous. Idk. It varies.
But let her know that she is your first choice.

>>31647200
Appreciate the response. Yeah, it's kind of funny. I feel like she tries to make me jealous by talking about/bringing up other guys too but maybe that's in my head. Sam is naturally desirable and it seems like she gets a rush out of being the center of attention while still not actually committing to anyone. This new girl who started working there is totally on her/exceeds her level of attractiveness, she's hot as fuck.

I don't know what a girl like Sam looks for in a guy for them to win her over.

>>31648203
This guy is spot on. I'm guilty of this myself. Although my procrastination is usually a result of me thinking she would not be interested in me. Although I have circled back a few times and thought "you know she's not that bad". It rarely works out though because this point if she is attractive then someone else has already swooped in.

how do i know if a girl is willing to come home with me after the party? i asked her where does she live she said nearby, but then she asked me, and said it was too far

was it really too far or did she not want to? i didn't want to ask her to come to the toilets, it was kind of really busy

ive come to realize girls like like seven types of guys

>>31648311
I'm confused. You asked and she said it was too far. If she wanted to go she would have went. You can't really blame a girl for not going home with a guy she just met. If you are really in to her it's a good thing in my opinion. Did you get her number to ask her out another time?

>>31648348
>you can't really blame
no, i wasn't, i understand that it's a bit too much
it's just that i know it's possible in some cases, just not sure about what puzzle pieces need to come together, not sure how to phrase my question

>>31648342
those seven types being

>>31648388
i was guestimating. It's closer to five after making the list. It sounds like whining though. I don't even want to argue it's true anymore. I don't fit into any of the types anymore except for desperate women.

>>31648436
share with us, i want to know if i fit and i also want to know what you belioeve yourself to be

>>31648440
>fit
fit only matters if you're at least 5'9" i think. the girls that don't mind or prefer manlets (like myself) generally want a stylish, cool, and sensitive man. generally there's a spectrum of loki-thor that girls like.

>>31648458
>generally there's a spectrum of loki-thor that girls like.
interesting but im not enough of a marvelfag to know what this means

>>31648484
i guess mythologyfag would be more right, but i also wanna hear what are the 5 types of guys

this girl tells me she cares more about personality than looks and said she wants a guy that looks kind of scruffy so people are impressed that he "got her" but every dude she finds cute is conventionally attractive like chad looking guy

Matched with this arabic girl on Hinge who is looking for a life partner. To be honest, the life partner shit kinda freaks me out, like I get overly conservative vibes when I see that, like I wont get sex until marriage.
We are pretty damn similar aside from that; both working in science, active, culturally. but I don't know what to message first. She is cute, not necessarily hot, but learned from the past the risk of getting burned with hot girls. What the fuck do I say. Am i supposed to ask overly personal questions? I don't know how to break the ice, I rarely use dating apps and am not a social person in general.

>>31649351
Calm down, you only matched, nothing really happened yet. It's likely that even with the best message you can come up with, she won't answer and be really interested.
Don't get invested until you actually get a date.