Long story short, my ex gf is a lying cheating piece of shit. I know this. I know I am better without her. Yet I still feel like I can't let go of this anger. Its been months and it's still here. I honestly do not want her back, she is not the woman I thought I loved at all, yet I cannot seem to get over the trauma, humiliation and anger because of what she did to me. It's like logically I can accept I'm much better without her yet emotionally I can'tCan anyone help me out? I want to let go and move on, but I don't know how to mentally do that. I just want to be able to feel at peace again
>>31683467>> she is not the woman I thought I loved at allI really wish you kids would stop using the word love when you don't even know what love is. Love is a connection between two people who know each other deeply and intimately. Your parents and yourself for example. You by definition can not love someone you do not know outside a familar relationship where a genetic connection is present. If you didn't know who she is, you didn't have the behaviour in order to actually know who she is, or longevity of relationship to develop such knowledge. Perhaps both. Either way, in such a circumstance it wasn't possible to ever actually love her.
>>31683516Gee thanks grandpa
Grief takes time to work through. Just go with it and don't wallow. Take steps to make your life good and the grief will subside over time. If you feel you can't get over it on your own, therapy can be helpful.
>>31683467the fuck she do
>>31683552Fuck one of her new coworkers
>>31683467Who said you need to let it go? You will be at peace again, the anger will subside, but you gotta allow it. That doesn't mean contacting her to go apeshit, that's a bad idea mostly for you, since she'll just spit in your open wound.But the anger? Man it's a lesson. One you gotta feel deeply because then that way later on in life you will instantly recognize red flags. You'll be able to avoid girls like your ex thanks to that anger doing its work on you. It's on your side, so don't fight it. If you can do that, you'll get the peace. Don't go thinking anger needs to feel good, it never does, so don't try to force a closure by doing the mistake I did when i was younger of "i need the anger to feel peaceful" lol thats not how it works. Just let it in, find a good healthy outlet, it'll pass. If it comes back in waves, rinse and repeat. There now you're stable again. It'll take time and a process but you'll get there. I promise you mate.
>>31683600Damn
>>31683467What do you mean learn?You just decide you'd rather change than keep doing what you're doing.Then, instead of having feelings for her, you try to not.
>>31683542Not OP, but this is good advice. I find it applicable to my own situation.
>>31683467Meditation
>>31683467Idk weed or somethin
>>31683600How long were you guys together for?
>>316894972 and a half years
>>31689511Wow man pretty much same story as me. 2.5 years and my girl became limerent for a remote coworker. I should've just dropped her, went no contact, but I tried to "work through it" like a beta and she dropped me because I had the audacity to get angry about it and ask her to stop spending after work time with him
>>31689673That sucks man. Mine wouldn't actually tell me she cheated till a few months after we broke up. She fell for the guy but he just wanted to fuck and didn't want a relationship with her. After getting burned by him she became a turbo whore
>>31689705I'm really angry too. It's only been about a month since our breakup. I'm just trying to convert it all into energy towards changing my career
>>31683467Welcome to the club. In my case, I was with mine for 9 years. We were due to go on a good holiday together for my birthday and she decided it was so thoughtful to end it a month before my birthday. Found out that she moved in with another man she works with a month after we split.2 years later, I was finally able to buy her out of my house. Rather than being relived and feeling free from ever having anything to do with her again, I feel nothing but sadness and emptiness.Shit is just going to take a long time for me to ever be fully free from this feeling. Also having to deal with the fact I'm in my 30s, suffering hair loss and feeling lonely in my house on my own and friends all getting locked off and settling down, I'm just hurt.I think you'll be fine within a few months, OP. It's not a super long relationship so you'll eventually feel ok after a bit.
>>31683467You need to realize you're not feeling -just- anger.You're feeling sadness, shame, humiliation, betrayal. You can't lump all of these together with "anger", they're different things.You can't lock these emotions up, just because they're not considered "acceptable", you need to deal with those too, or the anger will keep returning
>>31683467Face your emotions head on
>>31683467I believe normalfags are right when they say time helps even it doesn't heal the mental wounds they left on you.
That sucks, man
