>>31694777
First off, congratulations man, I mean that genuinely. The self understanding that comes after this sort of thing is huge. It’ll be a balancing act between knowing how much is/was your responsibility and how much can explain your shortcomings. It’ll be tricky, hard, but very worthwhile.

So here’s lesson #1. You don’t need their validation. You can just simply accept they won’t give you their approval, even if it hurts, and it will, but you accept it hurts and accept they ain’t giving it. Then you acknowledge the lesson - just because someone doesn’t feel what you feel does not make what you feel not real. It’s a great lesson. Because when reversed, you can also assume that of others around you. Everyone is the main character of their own life, fren. They don’t know everything about the other, or themselves, but over time both can understand. We call that human connection.

You want them to understand cuz you wanna connect but they dont wanna + are genuinely being awful about it. So give up on seeking their approval. You can do this without hating them, just find the space between the black or white, the like or dislike, the love or hate. Examine the inbetweens of all things.

>>31694777
I came out to my mother as a self-diagnosed autistic and she accepted me.
Sorry that you're parents aren't as understanding.
I guess what I'd suggest you is to figure out what you'd gain from parents accepting you and your diagnoses and try to obtain that by other means.

>>31694812
Thank you.
I just find it off putting when trying to do things and interact with people and your mother is looking confused, saying "what are you kidding about, anon" and slapping my hand. I am not aiming for validation from strangers anymore, but all my relatives are going to act in the same manner, like I have been replaced by an android or I am just acting like a fool and they don't know if it's funny or sad.
Maybe I should watch my mouth and not be that full on autist, try to be a bit more presentable, but when I found out how much easier for me everything was when I just let go, going back depresses me. But I understand nor being just a rude asshole is good manners, and I don't try to be one at all. It's not about being able to just do whatever I want and pull out a card saying "sorry I am autistic" but they might think I am being an asshole on purpose when in the past I was just a nice boy.

>>31694894
>saying "what are you kidding about, anon" and slapping my hand.

Well that’s partly the reason why your parents might be unaccepting at first, might even be saying real harsh shit. Precisely because it means they have to admit that there was a part of their parenting they had failed at. They didn’t cause your autism at all, it’s genetic as far as we know, but the socialisation process? Forcing you to be a certain way ‘or else?’ That has consequences on their autistic kid when kid becomes adult. Especially if they were overprotective or overbearing and chastising you into adulthood.

And parents put on the spot like that are always gonna deny and get angry. Then maybe they cool down, self reflect, and admit it. That can take a short while or a long time, its up to them or not. But yeah, you aint gotta wait for it lol.

>Maybe I should watch my mouth and not be that full on autist
Be sure to have a community to unmask, that is extremely crucial to undoing decades or social anxiety and self esteem issues, The mask is partly what causes the social woes in autism. The other part is shit you had no control over back in childhood, namely sensory issues making you avoid it and thus werent able to pick up social skills at crucial milestones. Which is where parents should have helped, but alas, they dont believe in autism. Do try to forgive them.

Good luck man, and heres to a good future