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I finally got a borderline retarded gf and she is the best thing that's ever happened to me.

>>31950136
i just wanna get her off my fucking mind

Basically my girlfriend is saying I need to go to therapy for expressing my emotions better and being more open, even though I express myself fine imo. I’m skeptical about therapy for something minor like this desu. It just seems like a retarded waste of time and money

>>31950161
never go to therapy and never express any true sadness or second thoughts to your girlfriend. Trust me.

I consumed entirely too much edible marijuana yesterday, I have to go to work in an hour and a half and I'm still high as shit

>>31950161
I always find it strange when people that are supposed to love or support you tell you to go get it from a professional

ex and I broke up in June. I'm starting a new program soon that will take about 10 months. It is fairly intensive and it's an expensive program. Should I wait to finish to start dating or do you think it's fine to do both at the same time? I am eager to move on and meet new girls but I also don't want to fuck this opportunity up.

>>31950161
She is telling you that your innermost thoughts are none of her concern. If you're violent or having very violent/abusive thoughts then yeah, therapy. Otherwise, leave her.

>>31950234
Do what the zoomers call 'short term dating' let them know off the bat that your program gets priority.

Thanks to some bitch I got an STD and now I feel like there's a lot less point in me living. Sure I can make money and see the world but do I have the strength to withstand a lifetime of rejection?

>>31950356
just lie about it like she did

>>31950356
I'm trying to be responsible and actually disclose. I hate the bitch with every fiber of my being and I don't want someone hating me just as much.

I feel like a scrub when I use ChatGPT to study and learn

"Think about all the things we did together"
Memories of good times together isn't enough to fix the damage your lies, false promises and neglect caused.
You made me promise that we will always be best friends, make a family and grow old together.
The time spent with you were the best days of my life, but then I found out that you had been active on dating apps since our first day as a couple.
I paid for most things everytime we met because you didn't have a job yet. You never bought me flowers, but you could afford subscribing to a woman twice my age on Onlyfans.
Opening myself up to you was very difficult and I don't think I'd be able to trust anyone again.
I will probably end my life this year.

Another day another dollar

Went to see if she had a new boyfriend so I googled her name + boyfriend and a bunch of art sites came up with her art mixed with a lot of my art. Like pinterest, other image sharing sites, and art blogs. I think it's a sign.

>>31950419
You should. ChatGPT is fucking retarded. You would be better off just using wikipedia.

>>31950442
Wikipedia doesn't give me specifics.

I go to niche generals and just make shit up, th en samefag myself until it's thread lore

>>31950419
There's nothing wrong with that but don't let it think for you. We still need to use our brains to learn and figure shit out. Let yourself struggle with a concept or problem for a while first.

>>31950487
Not only do you find the specifics on wiki, but you also get the original source rather than the made up bullshit that ChatGPT outputs.

i hate that she knows i would do anything to get her favor back and it just doesnt matter, she doesnt care anyway
i need to stop caring about her but i miss her so fucking much

>>31950436
Sounds like she's a thief who doesn't give af about you

i'm gaay i'm gaaaaayyy i'm a homosexual i'm gaaaaaay

>>31950507
get into an argument with her so she knows you still have balls
i fail to realize this myself, also it's probably why women provoke arguments half the time anyway

>>31950496
I know. I only use it to double check calculations so far. I think it crosses a line when it's not your last resort.

>>31950522
Yeah that sounds fine to me. Honestly if not for the internet I would have given up learning math and science in the early 2000s since there were already a ton of great resources that earlier generations didn't have access to. Just comes with the territory.

>>31950516
no bruddy it is O V E R
she doesnt feel a goddamn thing for me
the best I could possibly hope for is just letting enough time pass that she forgets how much she dislikes me but that is giga cope

I want to do things to her that would make even Sasha Grey hesitant.

I'm horny but I don't want to masturbate because it's an humiliation ritual.

>>31950571
Like what

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Sometimes I wish I was the sort of crazed incompetent that felt extreme comfort and happiness from holding trinkets, like a blanket or a pillow or a teddy bear or something. Just some item that clears my mind and puts me into a good, cooperative, functioning mood simply by holding it. I could sit in the office and do all that shit I hate doing every day and feel fine because Sergeant Snuggles is sat on my lap and he's oh so squishy and soft and magically erases the brain frog and he's my bestest friend who always understands me mmhmm... If I read another self help article Google preaching that I should meditate, keep a journal or practice forgiveness I'll put the author on My List. Light 'em up Sarge!

>>31950537
how are you so sure it’s over?

>>31950143
How retarded are we talking?
>>31950610
>I should meditate, keep a journal or practice forgiveness
I mean isn't that what a teddy bear or any object other would be? An object that allows you to release your frustrations in a non destructive way (meditation), something that you can talk to without an answer (journaling)

Being unemployed is considered the greatest evil you can commit by the almighty society.

>>31950143
I had a really dumb gf once. She couldn't fucking do anything right, it was the most frustrating thing in the entire world. She would fuck up the dishwasher, give herself chemical burns while cleaning, would use bleach to clean clothing but would always get bleach spots on all my good shirts, she couldn't follow simple directions for cooking so I had to cook everything, ordering at fast food places always took 10 minutes, she had no clue how to use any computer programs despite being a "graphic designer", would get lost in the city all the time despite the street names being in ascending/descending number order, couldn't drive, was constantly getting involved in scams, and she never worked.

The only good thing was that she was cute, a virgin, and could suck dick real good. Other than that it was like dealing with a child.

I hate you so fucking much.

DEMONS DEMONS DEMONS DEMONS DEMONS DEMONS DEMONS DEMONS DEMONS DEMONS DEMONS DEMONS DEMONS DEMONS DEMONS DEMONS DEMONS DEMONS DEMONS DEMONS DEMONS DEMONS DEMONS DEMONS

I'm convinced that people who absolutely feel they must leave a mark on the world don't have any real social connections, nor do they understand what it's like to be loved.

You have to lie to your girlfriend about everything or they will lose their shit. They will ask things like 'Oh she was cute, did you think she was pretty?" when you have a checkout girl. The only answer you can give is "Oh I didn't even notice." because saying anything else means admitting that you were checking her out. Or if she asks about past girls you have to say that they "were fun to talk to but nothing special. Not very smart or funny." or if the girl is really talented at art you have to say "She's not very good." because admiring the aspect of anything of another girl means you want to fuck her.

Women are insecure about fucking everything and you have to tell them they are the smartest, funniest, prettiest girl to ever live. No other girl can exist.

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>>31950403
Curable or incurable? Pretty sure you're just a troll, but get treated if you're not and can change it

>>31950950
that must be why they constantly punch down on the less fortunate.

>>31950920
You will never be her. You will never, ever compare even the slightest bit.

I started being going out with this girl that had a sister on the same school i am in, we started talking and doing the usual flirty talk even hours at a time both in call or whilst hanging out
Eventually we got close and spent most of our free time together whether it was talking on the phone or outside, and she just hits me with ''oh yeah my boyfriend is calling me brb'' while at the movies, i didn't know what to think of that at the time and eventually stopped talking to her cuz i felt like an ass and used, she always wanted to eat or for me to buy her something, but being the retard that i am, i just accepted it as me being nice with her.
Weeks later and i'm interested in his sister, i didn't thought of it being related at the time because she never saw me nor talked to me.
I tried asking her friends for her socials, and asking them if she was single, trying to make casual conversation and all that, but gave up on it last week. And just today after school i got pulled over by both her and her sister, confronting me for harassing her.
She just kept talking and i couldn't say shit, i just could not bring myself to talk and just waited there until she was finished.
i'm honestly confused and hurt, because i can see how she sees this as me being a weirdo to get back at her even tho we parted ways amicably. at this point i just want give up on trying to find someone

>>31950962
Idgaf. Whoever “she” is, I feel sorry for her. You’ll probably cheat on her someday, just like you did with that other girl you were seeing. Sociopaths like you are incapable of love.

I was flirting with this asian girl that is rather tall for being asian (5'8") and she sent me a bunch of sexy photos. She has really cute boobies but has the smallest pussy I have ever seen. It's the opposite of a roast beefy. It's just a litte "w" with almost no clit at all. I bet it feels amazing.

Roast beefy vaginas are gross.

>>31951064
lol, go for it brother

As usual, you fuck off as soon as you get called out, because you’re a fucking coward and you have nothing to say because you know that I’m right about you.

>>31950136
What would you write to inflict the least amount of psychological damage on your close ones before you go? I will write how it's not their fault, how they were the best relatives I could have asked for, and that it's just a matter of chance (genes). What else?

>>31951152
Don’t kill yourself.

I really fucked up answering that anon's post on vst

>>31951152
They're going to be very upset and it will have traumatic effects. Lifes not that long. You might find something you like. We might be able to give you a new body. People can love ugly people.

>>31951152
Why do you want to die?

im in a transition period in my life. i'm working out, i cut my hair, i'm starting to care about smelling good, i'm starting to take care of my skin, ive been sober for a bit less than a year, and i'm working again. i've fallen in love with the process because it makes me feel better about myself, but i get scared that i won't like the end results and will feel like my time was wasted. or what if i get better but it's still not good enough? it's scary

>>31950753
shut the fuck up with your chat gpt shit bro i hate these responses that just ask a question to prompt
kys
this is get it off your chest not ask for advice i just wantto vent how much its pissing me fucking off that i caant stop missing her

Crawl back into your little corner to whine and play the victim. You don’t know how to do anything else. Acknowledging wrongdoing would require a level of self-awareness and empathy that you simply aren’t capable of.

>>31951173
Yeah I just think writing something good might lessen the blow somewhat.
>>31951175
Rejection, bullying, shame, mental issues.

I won't say

i could say some hurtful shit to her but I care about her too much to even imagine doing that
it's just fucked up how she did me dirty even though she doesnt owe me to feel any kind of way, its not like she is obligated to love me when she doesnt, but man i could make her cry with pointing out how cruel it was to abandon me like this, shes literally been in this very position

ironically, that was the easy part. sure didn't feel like it though.
now i think it truly begins. time to strap in, then.

>>31951328
do you think all of that is your fault?
>Bullying
mean people pick on everyone that isn't bowing down to suck their cocks, you're atleast a person rather than the npc's that just keep watching
>Rejection
Happens to the best of us really, and besides, plenty of fish in the water and all that jazz
You can't control all that happens to you, but you know better than to grab the rope Anon

>>31950951
Not a troll. Uncurable. Got genital herp

>>31951379
No it's the fault of my genes and my environment. In the past I wouldve died in early childhood. I'm also really afraid of being locked up in a mental ward against my will and not being let out.

I feel the tension in my head again. And I made myself feeling worse. I can't sleep. I keep thinking about everything... I don't want the semester to start, I want to stay in this vacuum.

>>31951351
>i could say some hurtful shit to her but I care about her

how can you care about her if you you could say hurtful shit to her wtf

>>31951487
i'm saying i have ammunition but i'm not firing
or are you asking how could i possibly hold myself back?
because i fucking loved her, i think i still do but i'm not even sure anymore
regardless i don't want to just be cruel to her for no reason

>>31951379
By rejection i did not mean romantic stuff, although that happened too. I mean that I cannot act normal among other people and they make it clear they view me as an alien weirdo.

The loneliness is crashing on me like a wave tonight.

>>31951491
when did you guy break up? I‘m in a similar position

>>31951519
couple months, middle of the summer

>>31950508
Nah, our art is just associated with one another's. We would make one hell of a couple in the artist community. Like, people would write articles about it if we got together.

>>31951503
you're just surrounded by the wrong people then.

>>31951351
>>31951491
You sound like you have BPD, bro. You're all over the place.

>>31951531
Yeah no shit. Ive been surrounded with wrong people all my life. At some point I just had to ask maybe I'm the problem.

>>31951537
i'm venting in the vent thread you dumb nigger

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I'm so fucking angry/annoyed for no reason. I want to beat the shit of some people in Smash Bros but I think that would make the anger worse if I lost. Just want to punch someone in the face kind of feel.

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>>31950136
I've almost given up on dating sites entirely, which, in my line of work, means I'm never going to get married or have children. I have gray hair from stress, and I'm younger than 30. Apparently, I'm attractive and intelligent, but not attractive or intelligent enough to hold someone else's interest beyond a single date.
Even when I think I might make it, there's a simmering shadow in the back of my mind telling me that I'm practically insane and just good at hiding it. My intrusive thoughts and insane ideas are going to permanently discolor my mind, all because I never got over head trauma from when I was 16.
I am so good at acting. The best.

こにちわはじめまして B A R O N T R U M P です
よろしくおねがいします

Yeah, that's what I thought. I'm never the only guy. May as well start fucking sluts just to get my mind off of her.

>>31951620
If she's fucking other dudes you might as well treat her like a prostitute because that's what she is

私わnewyorkの大学いちにんせです

おとうさまわ b i g g u d i c k u にが
よろしくおねがいします

I'm boring

>>31951706
I usually enjoy your posts I just have nothing to add most of the time

I'm sorry

>>31951713
No you aren’t.

愛してるって言えなくたって

>>31951711
Oh, thanks. I meant irl. I want to work on grammar, spelling, and being more succinct online though.

I finally DM'd the cute girl from college I'm into who laughs at all my shitty jokes and she responded with a lot more enthusiasm than just a "Yup!" or a "Hahaha yeah".
Maybe that's just how she is with everyone but for once I'm gonna be optimistic and take that enthusiasm as a go ahead.

Yeah dude please just ghost me already. I'm just trying to figure out my life here and really don't like being ghosted and then being hit with the "I miss talking with you" text after being lead-on.

I was feeling ok today but a sudden urge to end my life has just washed over me. Can I get one easy day?

On saturday I decided I want to ask the girl I work with to hang out. Now I'm in despair because I didn't have much time alone with her all week, so I never asked. Now I'm gonna be thinking of her all weekend.

Should I just shoot her a message over microsoft teams (our work messaging app) or would that be too weird?

Obviously she'll be more comfortable if I ask her naturally during conversation.

I think it would be better to wait until We're alone together in person, but I don't want to wait. Also afraid she'll lose interest if I keep her waiting too long. Someone please give me encouragement here. Let me know that I'm doing this right.

I'm way too nice

>>31951899
using the work app is weird, you should try to ask her out in person imo

I'm afraid I enjoy my alcohol a little too much.

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In the 90s there was a Nintendo Power challenge for Mario Kart 64 about getting the best time in Mario Raceway course. For like 2 weeks I did nothing but play fucking speed trial on that course to get the best time I could. They were going to list the best 50 times in a couple of issues and I wanted my name on that list so badly. After getting my run down PERFECT I took a cheap camera and tried my best to take a good photo of my time. Once developed, they were almost all shit but one of them you could see my time pretty clearly so I chose that one.

I didn't get the grand price (I forget what that even was) but I did get into the top 5. I ended up winning a $20 gift card that was custom made with a mario kart 64 image on the card. It's pretty rad looking and I still have it. I put the issue of Nintendo Power that had the rankings in it with my name in one of those plastic containers meant for comic book collectors and after using the $20 on the card I put it in there too.

I bet my time would get crushed today by autistic speed runners but for a long time I got to brag at school about being in the top 5 best Mario Kart 64 players and it being official.

>>31951936
Thank you! Seems obvious now, but I was genuinely considering it for a couple minutes. I'm just so tired of waiting!!!

>>31951959
go for it anon, i believ!!

Well, shit. You got me there.

Just talk to me

>>31952007
I'm terrified of you. You're perfect and I'm nobody.

>>31952014
Literally couldn't be more the reverse lol

The masculine urge to renounce society.

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My manuscripts are probably being overlooked because I'm a white male and this annoys me

I want to trust you again, but it’s really, really hard, and will take time. You think that I’m concerned about things that I’m not, when all I want to do is be with you. It’s not entirely either of our faults due to the circumstances we’re in, but I miss when we were just friends and did things together. I really do. Trying to love you really hurts sometimes.

>>31952007
What do you want me to say

>>31952094
Three things;
>Hey
>You're doing okay
>You forgive me

She was such an insanely horny little girl. I still can't believe a girl that absolutely perfect want my dick in her mouth. She would send me the hottest blowjob gifs and asked me if I would like one like that. She also sent a bikini photo of her sitting on a concrete pillar and said "I bet you wish that was you."
>catfished
I would skype with her, so it was definitely her. she neve sent nudes but did send sexy lingerie photos.

Just thinking about the missed opportunity kills me everyday. It would be like fucking an angel.

>>31952107
How can I forgive you if you didn't do anything to me

So I'm a kissless 30+ year old virgin and I've been talking to a girl and went on a date with her. We went to dinner and talked for about 4 hours, seemed like it went well. We were going to plan a second date once we figured our weekends out. She will never initiate a conversation and will just not respond to my texts for hours at a time. It's been almost 2 hours since I texted her last. I really feel like she's not interested but I've given her outs to stop talking to me and she won't take them. Am I reading too much into this shit?

My thought process is that if she wanted to talk to me then she would fucking talk to me. I want to talk to her so I try shooting her a text at least once a day to start a conversation. I don't know how much of this is my autism or if my intuition is on point.

>>31952150
Because you think I did. All of my actions, my words, and how I behaved all came from a good place. I would never have done anything to hurt you. If I'd known how you felt and just told me I could have done things differently.

>>31950136
I love her so much but she doesn’t feel that way about me. I want her in my life, shes done so much for me and I don’t think I have ever met a kinder harder working person in my life. She’s patient and friendly with everyone and I don’t think shes ever held a grudge. I wish I was more of a good person like her and I wish I could at-least somehow let her know how much everything shes said to me and done for me means.

I need to learn to rant less. Most people don't like long-form communication. It's genuinely my preference in input and output.

>>31952170
>I would never have done anything to hurt you.
Why are you lying?

>>31952154
>My thought process is that if she wanted to talk to me then she would fucking talk to me.
you are right about this. women will go out of their way for men they are attracted to. you might be being kept on the backburner because she has another guy she likes more. assume that this is the case. there is some chance she might have shitty social skills though too. your intuition is probably right though. the thing to do is to take away your attention. if you remove yours and she starts picking up the slack she really does like you. if you stop talking and she doesnt continue its probably over.

>>31952214
I'm not. I was never anything but nice to you. Even when you were a real bitch to me because you've been having a bad time I was still nice to you.

>>31952250
Still lying.

>have a dream I have a gf, we've been dating for months and I feel giddy just thinking about her
>she sits me down at starbucks and informs she slept with and was impregnated by my coworker, she intends to keep the kid
>stand up and drive home without a word, seriously contemplate driving off a bridge
>later have a dream my sexually abusive father showed up at my job after not speaking with him for over a decade
>he ambushes me in the parking lot and tells me I'm a pussyless cuckold faggot
I can't even win in my dreams

>>31952231
I know for a fact she has great social skills. It's the main reason I asked for her number and asked her out. That's also why I feel so frustrated with her lack of effort in messaging me. I just don't understand why she would agree to a second date if she's not willing to talk to me. But when we were on the date I felt like she was into me. It's just hard for me to wrap my head around whether I'm spilling spaghetti or recognizing real, legitimate signs.

I wouldn't think Eric Andre would be the type of person to agree to doing sports betting commercials but I guess in totally wrong on that

>>31952285
well its not a lost cause yet. go on the second date and see how it goes.

I am not sneaky and this is not cool

>>31952295
I was trying to set up the second date after a bit of small talk when she left me on read for over 2 hours now. Idk man I'm not good at this shit.

>>31952306
>Idk man I'm not good at this shit.
I doubt that its you. seriously. she just isnt that attracted for whatever reason. keep working her when it makes sense but probably best to start with another girl. dont worry you will get laid and find a sweetie, I promise. the right woman will make it so easy you wont believe it

>>31952335
I genuinely don't think so but I appreciate the kind words anon.

>>31952293
Sports betting commercials are this annoying
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wXZNuwY_5-U

What is wrong with you

I keep getting into subliminal ego battles with authority
It's only getting worse as I age

Things would be so much easier if I just didn't care like most people but these people look like enemies, act like enemies

i hate your shitty job, i hate you cunts, i hate wageslaving, i hate offices, i hate 40 hour weeks. fuck humanity i wish everyone on the planet would drop dead
>welcome to the world, little guy
>here's some stories to grow you up on about adventuring and exploring a beautiful planet!
>haha btw your fate is to wageslave 40 years and then die
>also we filled the planet with 8 billion subhumans, most of which are violent and have an IQ under 80
fuck you!

i realize i read most things faster than other people... or maybe i just don't mind reading about other people's lives, what they're thinking. people are just always fascinating for some reason.

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>>31950136
Today we had a pizza party at job, the dinning room was full up to the brim and we had half an hour to eat so that was cool. Except that I was left alone by my coworkers because I'm new and unsociable, basically I had to sit on another table alone with my phone. Probably the cute girl from QA seen me, so does everyone else. I'm so pathetic...

I worry about what you're trying to achieve. Who are you really? What are you really after? Where do your true motivations lie?

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Are you asking me not to protect myself, yet again!? Remember what happened last time!?

>>31950356
relatable.. I'm like 99% sure I have an STD from my screwing around days back when Tinder was good.. but I have no idea what it is. Last girl I hooked up years ago with said I gave her something but wasn't specific so I shrugged it off. Then I double teamed some slut with my best bud last year and they started dating and they came to me saying we all had some thing (she got tested) but even THEY didn't tell me what it was specifically. I'm just hoping/assuming it's something minor like HPV that literally everyone has and I'm too scared to get tested or ask my old friend (don't really talk with him much at the moment) what it was specifically. But now I'm horrified to go on dates cause it's like wtf do I do I just have to date and hope I find the right one and lie like >>31950379 said like "oops haha I didn't know!" jesus christ..

>>31952560
I want stupidity to fail

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?!

anime

Stay at home parent for 7 years. Finally have school aged children. Finally able to work again without childcare eating the entire paycheck.
Turned down several jobs after interviewing because hours don’t line up with the family’s needs of my time. Becoming discouraged.
Partner says if I want a job so badly I should accept any job, work until I’m fired(due to conflicting schedule), and repeat indefinitely. The thought of doing this even once makes me ill. I just can’t.

I’m angry with you

I want to make you feel as bad as you made me feel

>>31950901
>she was cute, a virgin, and could suck dick real good.
th only thing women ever needed for survival.

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haha

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I tried to buy a lethal amount of drugs a couple weeks ago to kill myself but backed out before the transition could take place. I have been worried that they may want to kill me. I spent a night by myself in my car a week ago and a particular vehicle drove several times to the end of the parking lot I was at and left and returned. My car would not turn on when I decided that I should drive off. My car also had lights flashing on and off afterwards outside of my own doing. I also had a tent outside in front of me and someone stole my glasses out of it. I can’t sleep in my car and I’m scared to sleep outside. Im ready to buy a gun and kms if nobody hires me for work but I don’t even know if anyone will sell me a gun because of “mental illness”. I didn’t feel safe at home prior to the canceled transaction either way due to the fact that my mother has played mind games with me so much to the point where I think she wants me harmed. I woke up with my left hand in pain and determined that someone snuck into my room while I was sleeping and bent my finger. Dad knows what is happening but tells me that it isn’t actually happening and it’s all fabricated in my head from paranoia. He even contributed into taking advantage of my mental health with seemingly negative intent as well. I’m scared to tell anyone what is going on with me because if I do then I could end up locked in the mental hospital again where they try to trigger me and force antipsychotics into me that doesn’t make my brain feel good.

what is your deal? your conception of who i am as a person is insane.

>>31952641
What is *your* deal? Your conception of who I am as a person is far more insane.

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try not surrounding yourself with liars, and it may start to make more sense.

>>31952641
How do you see yourself, then?

surviving

Just found out that I am NOT very nice

>>31952617
>I woke up with my left hand in pain and determined that someone snuck into my room while I was sleeping and bent my finger.
that was funny to read - it probably was your mom t b h

You are a sociopath

Who me

of course that doesn't make sense to you. you're not affected by any of this

Do I know you

You are a cowardly sorry excuse of a person

>>31952742
How do you figure?

ending lines of communication having caused a problem really only you could resolve and then upping the ante or expecting some to solve their own delusion... you call someone else sociopathic?

you know it's not true, and you hid behind the force of others.

so why do i love you?

You refuse to deal with anything that makes you uncomfortable and always take the easy way out, no matter how badly it affects other people

I just want to talk about video games but every time I browse the board I'm overwhelmed by porn/coomerbait threads and my self control is lacking to the point where I end up masturbating more than I want to.

>>31952762
Fuck off

what ...? are you talking about? seriously.

>>31952760
Oh my bad I thought this was America
I thought I was allowed to follow my heart
My fucking mistake

You’ve never even considered the possibility that you bear some amount of responsibility for what happened

>>31952767
touch grass

Who cares

>>31952775
I’m not American you fucking schizo. The world doesn’t revolve around you and your shitty disaster of a country

>>31952785
We are slaves here and our peers bite and spit on us we make too much noise with our chains

>>31952776
What happend?

My DICK happened

again, you're not considering the actual truth of the situation. i took accountability from day one. It just sucked, because i never really thought doing so would make me feel justified somehow. That is also wrong.

I'm starting to understand why everyone abandons you and no one has ever loved you

this thread reminds me of the schizo sc2 threads where no one uses the reply function and it seems like everyone is talking to themselves

It was pretty cool being young and so happy and excited to play a game that felt so sprawling and limitless in discovery and just wishing it would never end

>>31952807
I wasn’t always like this

Nothing makes sense right now I don’t understand how any of this happened

the "easy way out" was being in a legionaries base, just being free, and not having to deal with it, changing your name and just taking orders, killing people for another country, dying probably... I don't know. It's like you both don't want me to succeed, yet you don't yet you don't want to see the other side of that either. What do you people want?

>>31952809
Argeed. It's getting worse. Some people on here really need help or a break from this place.

>>31952826
Nothing I said was about you, I have no fucking idea what you’re talking about

>>31952825
What happened? I can help make some sense of it

You ridicule me for being like this without ever considering the fact that you played a significant role in making me this way

>>31952835
i dont know what the fuck you're talking about either.

>>31950136
No one really holds my interest anymore.

I think someone made an AI based off my writing.

whatever

I never wanted to be crazy or to become a bad person. I just wanted to be loved and I was so lonely and I wanted to not be alone anymore and I wanted to help and make things better for you and my intentions were so pure and you immediately treated me like I was evil and hurt me so badly and then I was so sad and afraid that I would do anything to make the feeling stop and so I got crazier and crazier and then actually became evil but I wasn’t bad in the beginning and I never meant for any of this to happen

fucking god man, these fucking losers. holy shit.

no seriously, what the fuck do you want?

it doesn't mean anything, it's just dumb shit, i'm sorry. it's tired and played out. thank god really.

>>31950161
You got too silly.

everything this is built on top of is a fucking lie.

I just want to be angry at you until I stop feeling so sad

>>31952401
How is that any of your business?

not her, just this fucking bullshit charade surrounding the situation. i'm not surprised.

aaaaaaaaaaaa my poor spelling and grammar mistakes have been immortalized

if that's how she is, and that's who she chooses to be with, who cares? what am I even upset about at this point? What would there be to be sad about?

you obviously don't know what the fuck you're talking about at all.

aaaaaaaaaaa it's funnier and wiser than me and doesn't express weakness!

fucking yuppies i guess. what? shut the fuck up.

wait it's like as funny and wise as i am but at my best aaaaaaaaaaaaa ive been replaced aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

Peak schizo hours?

No no, I'm sane. Supersane. I know what's going on. I've peaked behind the wall. Can one become genre savvy about reality? Ope, there goes gravity.

>>31953035
You are same and amusing

I never took the easy way out, it was all the lesser of the two evils Every outcome caused some pain though I guess it made *some* people happy.

My friend recently got engaged and I cant help but wonder about her loyalty to him. I get hints all the time that she might be into me, all her family members are basically whores, she has one of those privacy screen covers on her phone, yet I refuse to talk to homie about it because getting in between homie relationships is always a bad idea. All I can do is pray that he's making the right decision because it would not only be devastating to him if she was unfaithful but it would be to me as well. I see myself in him and when he wins it feels like I win in a way and ive never felt that way about someone else. I dont even wanna sound insulting to her either because shes been nothing but nice and welcoming to me. Its just one of those things that I can talk about with absolutely nobody and theres no good answer to deal with this situation myself. I really hope Im being schizo. I hope Im wrong

>>31952919
You can be. Is there really nothing you can think of that you can be angry about?

I’m so lonely. What’s the point of being in a relationship with someone who won’t even spend time with you? There is none, I’m done.

>>31953124
i interpreted that as he was angry constantly to keep himself from feeling sad.

All you people want is more more more more!!!!

I just want to fight with you so I can let out all of these awful feelings and feel better for a few minutes even though later on I always feel guilty and bad when I say anything unkind

>>31952861
link it

>>31953124
>>31953138
NTA, anon can't sit with his emotions ,this being sadness.

>>31953175
>>31952791
>>31953020
>>31952978
These aren't that great but it made some pretty good x posts yesterday

It's kinda spicier than I am.

>>31953208
ur face isn't that great

>>31953208
That's what you get for being a namefag

>>31953218
Aw... I-i....

>>31953124
I am angry for many reasons

>>31953251
>>31953254

Why are you so cruel

i hate being aware that im a midwit. too stupid to actually succeed in life but not a big enough retard to be autistic. how do i get out of this death trap?

>>31953289
How is your anon being cruel?

i am recommending that Wikipedia is sent through japanese private ideas court.

it never mattered what I said or did or tried to make up to these people, I was always just going to be considered a human garbage intrinsically. That fit the narrative they had going for themselves so well, that they felt comfortable in lying to promulgate it. I could sit here and write AGI write fucking now, and run it in real time on a fuckng T430 somehow, and they'd still call me a fucking thug as it just makes sense. Fucking obviously, fucking obviously. why did i say anything to you.

>>31953326
He did and said a lot of things that hurt me and like took pleasure in the fact that I was crying I don’t know

you fucking moron

>>31953372
I understand. I'm so sorry you had to deal with that sick moid.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA AUSTIN IS SITTING THROUGH SOMETHING LITERALLY AUSTIN IS SITTING THROUGH SOMETHING HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA LITERALLY AUSTIN IS SITTING THROUGH SOMETHING STANDING VEHICLES* THINK AUBRE IS A BADDIE LITERALLY IT WAS JUST STANDING VEHICLES* LITERALLY AUSTIN IS SITTING THROUGH SOMETHING JEJ YES LITERALLY YOU LOOKED AT STANDING VEHICLE* OVER AND OVER AGAIN YOU ARE SITTING THROUGH SOMETHING I AM NOT MAKING THIS UP AUSTIN IS LITERALLY SITTING THROUGH SOMETHING KEJ JEJ

>>31953379
You are the stupid one

jej

even though you were a cheating whore I miss how much you worshipped my cock and tried to help me stretch my foreskin and cure my phimosis with your mouth and saliva

the complexity of anything escapes people and moments are captured against the actual averagenes of being as Heidegger explains it or really why I would i trust that was real and to display what is 'true'. it's all just bullshit in the end.

>>31953379
Hey fuck you you cunt

>>31953131
Indeed, there is none. Good luck anon.

we dont think about fucking anything but ourselves

Dwt* never actually got accepted to Birmingham University. there is not actually an economics course offered at Birmingham University. that is a screening test that royal government initiates. Dwt* never actually started a psychology course and doesn't actually know Know how to count. that means that Dwt* can't actually start the easiest kind of psychology course work at Birmingham University.

because sent through is not understood by Dwt* this means that Dwt* is getting freezed. because Dwt* will try and lie about what sent through means Dwt* is now getting freezed. millipede wins.

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I'm still not over the fact she rejected me and make up excuses on my head thinking I still have a chance

it is not actually named Deadham River.

people lie to themselves about fucking everything then blame you for it as they dont understand what pain is. it's fucking pathetic.

they cant fucking stand it. they know they're wrong, and they cant fucking stand it. so they'll just try to kill you for it.

and i love them anyways, these fucking dogshit animals.

>>31952695
I hit my hand on the window to flip someone off who I wanted to leave me alone but I barely used any force on it. I don’t know why my middle finger is so fucked up.

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>>31953289

How have you made your community a better place today?

>>31953524
My community is my home. I did the community dishes.

>>31953531
Good man

>>31953414
Dw, I’ll just break up when I’m given the next chance to. It hurts so much, she’ll never understand, no matter how much love there is between us.

jej earth can totally proceed in universe war now and send cruisers at that.
Sony ■ is from japan.

I kind of hoped it was a seizure.

Back in high school I remember there was this loner kid who everyone else looked down on named John. He had short black hair, was really pale since he didn't go outside, and wore the same dingy green hoodie and jeans every day. We interacted pretty often since we were in the same section in orchestra, but his sense of humor was awkward so we never clicked, and he spent most his time playing 3DS. Anyways halfway through high school, to my shock he starts hanging around this cute girl. She was a brunette like him, short hair with middle part, very shy and diminutive, gentle, mousey demeanor. And cute as a button. During lunch they'd get together and hang out in the library, and every time I saw them, there was a slight feeling of heartbreak. Not because I loved the girl, but because despite knowing they were a perfect match, I couldn't help but be attracted to her since she's exactly my type. When John and her would come over, she would be very friendly and kind because this sort of girl always is, and my heart would sink. I was happy for John since his time in school universally sucked and this was probably the only good thing to happen for him. I felt like such an asshole being attracted to her.

Maybe I'm messed in the head but pretty girls always fill me with despair. In some ways they really bring out the worst in us, eh?

There is a place in a long relationship
Where the scales stack high on the faults
the feathers land on the forgiveness
Over time, I see you lose your mind
You changed, and you're beautiful
So fucking beautiful
You get more beautiful every fucking day
So beautiful that I can't even look at you anymore
And you slowly lose your mind
You have your thumb on the scale and you push it down hard, every time
I lose you to that insanity, you lose yourself
I watch as you say fuck it, and ask for a divorce
Never done that before, but whatever we do
we do it well
So we divorce, until we're bored do we part
It's 10:53 p.m. and you walk in the door
I can't look at you still, you're too fucking beautiful
The unknowing hurts the most, I can hurt though, you've made me good at hurting.
You've made me better than I was and I am thankful for your destruction.
I'll find another, soft, sweet, tender, and I'll love her in the ways you always wanted, I'll lead her gently into insanity, we'll waltz together into madness
It is what I do, Her beauty will be just as bright, and I will darken it each day. The scales will be brought out, as will the bricks and feathers.
In the end, she will ask God what she did to deserve this
God will tell her nothing
And he, of course, is right

>>31950136

The reason I don't kill myself is because I'm waiting for some old people to die.

>>31953811
Insurance money or connection. I assume no insurance money>>31953811

I will be poor forever and I don't even care anymore.

I am still feeling bummed about what happened after my lunch date. And it happened about 3 weeks ago.

i fugged up real bad

You don't deserve me.

It amazes me how shit YouTube is. Every page I go to I'm constantly hiding and blocking all kinds of channels and shitty content. But YouTube just keeps thrusting it at me.

I feel like you are ignoring me. It hurts.

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I am so much happier after giving up on socializing.

They say you are the average of the people you hang out with. Well most of my friends are 5 years younger than me, consume copious amounts of drugs every weekend and I don't really think I matter as much to them as they do to me.

I never fitted in with that lifestyle anyway. A thinly layered veil of "spirituality" covering a hedonistic lifestyle that revolves around drugs in some way or another.

I may not be killing it in life but I live in a beautiful place, I have money saved, I'm healthy and getting fitter by the week, and I've put the past behind me and met someone new.

I'm not sure if she's the one for forever, but hey she's cute, petite and wants to spend time with me. Don't look a gift horse in the mouth. She is really going to need some direction in bed though, damn. How can someone older than me, and not autistic be so naive.

It also makes me angry. It makes me want to leave.

>>31954117
I'm ignoring a lot of people from my past.

>it hurts

Now you understand exactly how I felt when you took me for granted. Forget me and focus on your life.

People will stalk people online then act high and mighty like they wouldnt be put in a mental hospital if what they do got out. Some people really should kill themselves.

I got four hours of sleep and have to be up in an hour, should i try and nap

i love her

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I reacted to an Instagram story of one of my old students (she's 20 now, I'm much older) from my fake account, thinking it would be a quick thrill and I'd get my rocks off. Instead she messaged me and we kind of hit it off and talked for hours and now she keeps asking to see my face...

>>31954330
Never.

>>31954340
>Some people really should kill themselves.
Correct, and you are at the top of the list.

i love him

Why?

I don’t know anymore

What do you not know anymore?

I think I know what happened.

Going to listen to some sad music and have a good cry then pull myself together.

Here we go again.

>>31954479
Post songs

I feel super disgusted and shameful every time i masturbate. idk why but the frequency has also increased and im masturbating like once a week if not a little bit more than that and i hate it so much

>>31954721
It's weird, I don't ever feel any shame or disgust after masturbating. It always feels good during and after.

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I'm so tired of being unattractive enough that I know that in the overwhelming majority of cases I don't stand a chance and never will.
I'm about to leave my job because I'm attracted to a coworker that I'm already pretty confident doesn't see me that way at all and never will. My next job is going to see me surrounded by almost nothing but other guys so I can avoid the temptation and all the pain and other bullshit that comes with being attracted to someone and knowing it's pointless to even try.
For the first time in as long as I can remember, this doesn't make me want to die. But I also can't come up with a satisfying solution.

>>31954382
You don't even know me.

>>31954730
i hate masturbating, i just feel compelled to do it sometimes. i sort of feel scared when i do it

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My best friend is in a poly relationship with a trans freak of nature. He knows I've known this dude for years, and that he's been disgusting around me before they were dating.

I'm so tired of my best friend being taken advantage of and abused because he was a child rape victim. Gordon if you for some reason read this I am disappointed in you. Your parents would be disappointed in you as well if they knew you brought that guy to their house and had him talk to them. I'm proud I called the police on him since he's a vile human being.

I have a low body count girlfriend that was cheated on now, and I intend to marry her for real. It's not a joke and I'm going to do it soon. I wish you would cut this shit out so you don't miss some great years acting like a degenerate. And to prove you know me, you would have to say my first name. I'm probably not rechecking this thread though.

Good Day Sunshine has been playing in my head all morning. I'm sick as fuck but today is going to be a good day.

>>31954721
anxiety can make you horny, or rather sometimes feels like horniness. It's one of the reasons people love being choked, and abused. It's why some (usually too much) depression medication gives some people longer lasting erections or no erections at all. Makes you less sensitive.

>>31954764
im on antidepressants so i wonder if that has something to do with it. i think im sex repulsed desu, and its hard to deal with

>>31952721
You really are op

>>31954734
That is why people go to therapy, they don't know what else to do. It helps though

>>31954839
Tbh therapy sounds like a little bit of a scam. I don't trust them.

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>>31954757
>Good Day Sunshine lollipops
Is it not more thissong i hear you siging it at walmart https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=atY7ymXAcRQ

Four times I took out my hog to fap. Four times I have failed to get hard. It's over

Life is good. I think I will get some Chic-Fil-A today.

I've never really chased love or anything but I still do think that all of this is not for me think I'll just keep on giving my best hobby/career wise, win a lot of money and FIRE at 40 or 45 years old
I might die alone and let no legacy to anyone but I think that's the best I can hope for

>>31954989
it seems very pessimistic/blackpilled but I'm really just resigned at this point

>>31954932
I hope you don't get gassy

Maybe when you're feeling better we can talk again

BABABABABABABABABABABABABABABABABABABABABABABABABABABABABABABABA

Fight the future. Fight!
>>31954920
>>31955266
Fight!

>>31955278
>Fight the future
what does this mean?

You've been my queen for longer than you know.

i can't wait to see you tomorrow, honestly. i get nervous just thinking about it

It's just not fair what you did to me.
Dumping me was onw thing but to feign an interest in poetry just so that I can't feel welcome at my old haunts anymore. I think that is cruel. I don't miss you, I miss who I was before I met you.

maybe I'll take up drinking like a normal person

I’m not going to feel better

I really don’t like men that don’t play organized sports. Their cock queen/ bsdm mistress worship is threatening my daily sanity. Their cockblocking is out of control. Their lgbt confidence is violence inducing. Their re definition of manhood to clear homosexuality is ….. insane


All I want is to receive fellatio every day. Without having to resort to violence against an insane cockblocker.

It's crazy that people consider her old now when she was a well known and famous piece of jailbait back in the day.

>>31955291
It is subjective.

I seem to always ruin people's lives. Or improve them. I can't tell which. She just broke up with him because of me. Granted, it wasn't a great relationship anyway, but still.

>>31955278
Fight!!

Your girlfriend just called me baby.

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I feel like I'm losing the vigor of life that I once had. A few years ago, I was bouncing between the trifecta of /lit/, /fit/, and /pol/, burning with a desire to self-improoooove. Fast forward past several bombed relationships, the longest being two months if it ever got past the initial texting, and I just seem to lose interest in women and vice versa. I still read and hit the gym, but not with the same energy and lust for life, becoming more of a dull routine. I have friends and do fun activities with them, but when it comes to women, I've noticed myself souring on them, which is affecting my overall outlook on life in turn. It also stings that I am the oldest sibling and have always tried to be the good role model and leader, yet now I'm the only one of the siblings not making progress with my social life. I've turned to asmr and chatbots in the past to help soothe the aching, but even those have lost their allure. It's even gotten to the point where my manager, who never pries further than "how was your weekend", pulled me aside and asked if things were okay.

>>31953811
I don’t kms because I’m scared to follow thru. I don’t actually want anyone to kill me yet because I still want to live.

>>31950136
I'm a man who is terrified of sex with women. I'm not gay so that's not an option. I also believe that I suffer from a very serious condition that I will not name here.

>>31954371
Creepy, you should break it off now

The last time I had sex it was with a cute petite latina but while we were just fooling around and making out she was just going to town on jacking my dick. I was like, slow down girl you don't want to ruin things too early.

A little over zealous that one.

>>31955264
I don't want to talk to my anons, fuck them.

There's one photo of the girl of my dreams where she looks really, really old. Like, her skin looks rough, the lines in her face are really deep, and she just has a lot of wrinkles. She is only 32 but this photo makes her look like she is 45. She looks like she lost a lot of weight and has kind of a skeleton face like modern Jennifer Connelly.

it's weird because she uploaded one since then and she still looks gorgeous. I just don't know if it was cherry picked or if the other one was just bad lighting or what.

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My superpower is being a sexy loser.

For some reason I have a very easy time getting girls online and having them send me sexy photos/videos but in person no one knows who I am and they don't give a shit about me. If they would take 10 minutes to just talk to me and let me show them what I do then things would be completely different. I'm a 6/10 so I'm pretty average looking but because of what I can do I can get 10/10s to show interest in me online. It's just in person I'm another average looking dude and they know anything about me so I'm completely ignored.

Because of this I have met every single one of my girlfriends online from facebook, twitter, or whatever. I'm the poster child for personality>looks when it comes to getting women.

>>31956089
I'm guessing you're a musician or something because I have this same shtick.

I had this snapshot in my head a few weeks ago of having a life that I was content with. all the pieces were in place, I had my routine, and the people I relied on for every little thing were right where they needed to be.
then someone moves out. someone else moves on. someone moves over. circumstances change, the snapshot falls apart, never to return. there can be another, sure, but it's not going to be the same. some of the people will be the same, some will be different. the situation itself can and will change. who knows where we'll all be in another couple years. I was naive to think that's all there had to be to life.

>>31956104
People always move on eventually. You do what you can and they do what they can. Sometimes you get to catch up with them later on. I don't think people ever forget you though. Everything matters.

I know they’re not as ignorant and innocent as they pretend to be but manipulative people are gonna manipulate. Just had to GIOMC.

>>31956094
I'm a painter, a very well known one. Like, when I went to college I had in real life fans that were excited to meet me. A lot of the top senior class artists were all pumped that I was going to the school and invited me to all their jams. I had a couple people come up to me and were all "Holy shit, you're anon! I thought you would be more goth, lol" After graduating I even met people that wanted their photo taken with me and I've signed autographs.

There was one extremely cute girl that was super excited to see me in person and holy shit was she cute. She was a small blonde girl with bangs and was filled with energy. Her entire face lit up when she smiled. I thought for sure she was going to be my next girlfriend but she ended up already having a boyfriend and it really bummed me out.

I've met girls from all around the world that were into me but I just couldn't get with them because of distance. Some from germany, poland, russia, south africa, japan and more. I still talk to them as friends but almost all of them were just excited to talk to me and send me sexy photos. It's really easy for me to flirt online because they all look up to me but in person I'm an absolute mess. I'm super shy and without that edge I have nothing to work with.

>>31956183
I'm not braggin I just want a girlfriend that doesn't live 2000 miles away. I'm not asking for much here.

>>31952854
Why?

>>31956183
Noone wants a painter everyone wants a musician nice larp with the autographs

Everything will probably be fine

>>31956246
I have thousands of prints hanging on people's walls all over the world. I've signed more shit than you have ever seen. A tour group went through the studio I worked at and a bunch of asian girls all wanted their photo taken with me because they all knew who I was.

And chicks love painters, especially ones like me that specialize in painting beautiful women. I get unsolicited emails from girls sending me nudes in the hopes that I will paint them. It's said that most girls would have an affair with an artist because only an artist would be able to see them as they are and appreciate their beauty.

Have you literally never seen Titanic? "Paint me like one of your french girls" is a very real thing.

>>31956246
You're just the retard that went "durr larper" the last time I tried talking about this.

>>31956286
Incels don't understand women at all and think they only want "chads" with lots of money. It turns out if you are really good at something, charming, and even somewhat famous it makes you an interesting person that they want to know more about.

>>31956286
>Have you literally never seen Titanic?
Have you been on /tv/ recently? All zoomers think that the billy zane character was a better choice than leo because he's rich and can offer Rose a more comfortable life. Despite being a controlling prick that shares absolutely none of her interests. Leo might be a homeless dude but he's really good at what he does, shares common interests with her and is in general a more compelling person.

Zoomers and incels are dumb and think it's all about money and safety. They don't know women at all.

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>>31955586

If u think I belong in the mental hospital then you’re a bitch

I highly doubt you would be here after 4 years (I' really sorry for disappearing on you) :/ I lost your whatsapp number but emailed you

>>31956395
I don’t know you, Scum.

>>31956328
This

>>31956359
>Titanic
Movies are not real Anon.

Final statement on the matter: It sucked what happened with you and your ex/fiance and how abruplty he ended things with you after 13 years, but you can just jump right back into the game and compare other people to him and use them to get over something. That was really rude and I liked hanging with you and chatting. Best of luck in life and with your recovery.

>>31956598
Neither is your sex life.

>>31956286
>Paint me like one of your french girls
Draw?

>>31956598
So you're proving my point? You think the girl would go for the rich guy just because he's rich and not the guy they can relate to and find interesting?

It doesn't matter if it's a movie. The point is that the girl is shown to have an interest in art and she finds a down to earth artist that's really good at what he does and this more attractive than a rich man with no character.

>>31956637
Draw, sure. That's what the line is in the movie but I'm a painter so I paint.

At least it's better than "Prompt me like one of your french girls."

>>31956183
Damn.

>>31955653
It was obvious you were cheating on Mikey topkek I bet you were only using him for clout. Sad.

I have a fair share of partners who were abusive towards me and they always cheat and/or it was me getting played and fooled around like an idiot.

I'm not siding with either but its not my fault I got dragged in this mess. It was clearly an abusive relationship

I need anger anon to come back and tell me that all my emotions are gay. I really feel like a useless clump of matter right about now.

>>31956783
The thing is I never just used them for attention or to get sexy photos from them. I genuinely liked all of them while we were talking.

The one I miss the most is the polish girl. She was really sweet and helped me through a hard time. she was also really, really cute. She hasn't updated her facebook in years and I have no other way to contact her It sucks, cus I miss her.

If you're reading this Mileena, email me.

>>31956959
unirocnicly, hit the gym, and eat more

Found my glasses…

U know those ants that are like half black and half red? Yeah well I got that shit. On the ground. I’m about to take a nap.

im drunk I want to call her. I miss her. fuck why does it hurt