I usually don't feel the need for validation in any aspect of my life - I'm pretty confident in myself and I find it easy to put my trust in people.But when I'm in a relationship, everything goes out of the window. I become someone who needs reassurance and validation, and in a way, it stresses me out. Am I not trusting my partner enough, am I insecure (scared to be abandoned)? How can I make this neediness go away?
>>32010078I won't read how do I not give a shit what anyone think threads. I can't tell you.
>>32010078When you're by yourself, at some point you understand yourself enough that you feel like you have everything under control. When you get a partner, it's like a new source of chaotic energy. Suddenly there's something you can't control and can hurt you. So, understandably, you try to get some reassurance.You have two choices: get to know your partner better. It takes time and efforts, but it'll have a better idea of how she thinks - knowing each other will also lower both your insecurities towards one-another.Other choice is to know yourself even better: if she did X, how would you react? Essentially, establish a plan B for if things go wrong. This way you'll feel more secure about yourself.
>>32010078>I'm pretty confident in myselfYou might want to reevaluate this as it's clearly not true.
>>32010343What I want to know is why these fears only appear when I'm in a relationship. Nothing happened in the past (I wasn't cheated on, I was actually the one who ended my past relationships - due to fear of commitment and insecurity, granted).
>>32010078>How can I make this neediness go away?Don't express it or seek to satisfy it.Normally this is unhealthy. But for this specific thing, it counters the habit.
>>32010440If you're not in a relationship, you don't need to worry about letting anyone down.
