So I did it guys, I matched with someone on a dating app, we exchanged instagram accounts and are now talking about a date and what we want from a relationship.However after seeing her Instagram, I don't really think she looks as good as she was on her dating profile. She looked like a solid 7-8 on the dating app, but looks more like a 6 on her Instagram.Now, the messaging phase is fucking awesome, she never had a relationship and overshares everything, she literally spams 20-30 messages, it's insanely easy to talk to her and she sounds very nice every time we talk, got a nice personality. Even told her about my more unsexy hobbies like gaming etc. and she really respects them.However, if I ask myself if I would go for her or my college crush who looks like a solid 11/10 with a basic white girl personality, I feel like my stupid fucking brain would go for the 11/20 and I don't think this thought in the back of my mind is fair for the 6/10.Should I just go for a date and have some nice friendly fun to see what she's like irl AND EXPERIENCE DATING or should I already just cut the connection early on?I am also kind of a broke college dude and idk if it's worth spending my money on a 6/10 although she literally told me she was okay with splitting the bill and even meeting at a location that's in the middle of our living locations, so I really like that she's not a pretentious bitch that thinks she deserves the world, she's very humble and real with me.After all of this I feel like I am a superficial, narcissist cunt that thinks he deserves better, but can't really change these ideas.I even started thinking if I wanted a girlfriend or just the confirmation that I COULD get one due to my huge insecurities and I think it was the second one...New college semester is also about to start and I'm thinking that it might be better to just try and get someone from my college instead maybe? 6/10 lives like an hour away from me and has already started working too
>>32012021>After all of this I feel like I am a superficial, narcissist cunt that thinks he deserves better, but can't really change these ideas.I feel you are, but that aside, let's be realistic. You just started college. You have no idea how you fare socially or if it's easy for you to get girls. Nowadays, it's usually not that easy.Have you had easy dating before? How many girlfriends? How many times have you gotten laid?You might refuse this experience for shitty reasons and then have the rude awakening that you're not the casanova you think you are later. If your reason to not date this girl was to be "I don't want a girl that's on an app" etc then I'd find it at least more understandable.Have fun being all alone and regretting this years down the line when you're having difficulty getting any girl that isn't long distance.
>>32012035Also, you haven't even started college. Big changes you won't even fit in with any girls in there or any of the fabled "fun social circle" that solves all your problems. You're still living a delusion becaue you have no experience. If you go date this girl at least this will build confidence and experience on what to do with a woman. You're self-sabotaging yourself into inceldom.
>>32012035the idea of "it's better than nothing" is eating me up. > Have you had easy dating before? How many girlfriends? How many times have you gotten laid?I am a kissless virgin.> You might refuse this experience for shitty reasons and then have the rude awakening that you're not the casanovaI think you're right, but isn't pretending to like her also not bad? How can I shake off this feeling of narcissism?>>32012043> you haven't even started collegeI did, it's my second year, I simply never properly went the first year and basically never really interacted with a girl. I kind of know the college life and feel comfy enough to just make my own plans around it. The problem is that I major in computer science and can't really get in contact with girls.I was thinking about simply using apps again, but filtering for my university to meetup with people, I also feel like the power dynamic in terms of money might also be more fair this way due to both of us having similar life and responsibilities.> If you go date this girl at least this will build confidence and experience on what to do with a woman.I do think you're right, I think it might be a fun experience and who knows, maybe I fall in love with her voice or eyes or her thoughts...I just really think she's a respectable, "good", person and don't want to play these stupid mathematical games with her. I feel like she deserves someone that thinks she's a 10/10 and not a "better than nothing" option. Or maybe I just say this to not feel like a cunt about myself? idk...Is it ethical or right to just go out on a date with thoughts like this???
>>32012021>she really respects themThis means she's really a 3, 10 years older than she claims, and is desperate to find a man to keep her in the style to which she would like to become accustomed.
>>32012021>> She looked like a solid 7-8 on the dating app, but looks more like a 6 on her Instagram.I swear you cunts just randomly select numbers. She's none of these numbers. At absolute best she's a 5, but probably more like a 3 or 4. Leagues are not subjective. They are mathematical. 6/10 and above don't use casual sex apps. Ever. Male or female.
>>32012058You're being an autist because you haven't even went out with this girl, so you don't actually know if you like her or not. Your posts scream self-sabotaging. Most likely you'd be more into a girl with a bf or that's giving you the cold shoulder sometimes.
>>32012073>>32012071Nigga the numbers are based on what I think. Who gives a fuck if I think the fucking Shrek of a girl is a 10/10?? Don't fucking get caught in the details and write me some real advice here.
>>32012021wow, shocker that someone would try to put their absolute best photos on a dating website in an attempt to sell themselves to potential suitors. it truly is a big mystery why that would be the case and have the more candid images on her instagram. OP, you sound like a big dumb fucking idiot who is going to fumble both of these women due to your khhv: the 6/10 is already trying to make your life easier but would be devastated to know you're going after the 11/10 who probably doesn't even know you're alive. maybe you'll learn a valuable lesson when that happens, but probably not.
>>32012080Alright, then I'm just gonna go out on a date with this and see if I like her or not.How many dates should I go out on at least you think to make sure I like her or not?
>>32012096What's better, going out with the 6/10. And telling her that I would actually go out with a 11/10 while trying to be 100% honest with her?I will go out with her to see if I like her or not tho, I am pretty certain on that.
>>32012103Two most likely. But if you're sure after one, that's fine too. This will give you enough time. Unfortunately, the best remedy for your narcissism would be for you to live more and experience loneliness and how shitty trying to date is.
>>32012082Why do you think her instagram photo isn't also curated to hell and back?
>>32012109>And telling her that I would actually go out with a 11/10 while trying to be 100% honest with her?Are you fucking kidding me? would you like it if she said that to you? It doesn't matter what you think or how honest you want to be, never make someone that's actually interested in you feel like they're not good enough or second to someone else. This is pure autism. You'll most likely die alone if you say this kind of thing.
>>32012109why the fuck would you think mentioning that would improve your situation? my theory that you're a big dumb fucking idiot is becoming more feasible with every word you type.
>>32012123Even an 11/10 would see the narcissistic autism seeping through a line like that when you're being "honest" and reject you on the spot, by the way.
>>32012110> Unfortunately, the best remedy for your narcissism would be for you to live more and experience loneliness and how shitty trying to date is.I think I just fucking enjoy "pretend" idea of loving someone I cannot reach. The comfort of just obsessing over someone, but also all of it being in my head and me not having to put on any effort etc. feels very comfortable. I can just game and then after a bit think about my crush, then go back to gaming and it's all in my head.I have a close friendgroup which I have great relationships with and have a brother that's more like a friend to me. My workplace is also pretty social. I don't think I really crave social interactions, it's just nice to get some experience on the dating life stuff I guess.I am also not a turbo autist or anything like that, I'm just not really the guy to go the parties or feels so confident to just cold approach girls.
>>32012132As someone very similar to you, I fumbled lots of chances and I've felt the pain of loneliness later, and also the pain of finally finding someone only for that person to tear me apart. If you find someone that's actually decent, don't waste it. At the same time, if there's an actual issue you're not ok with (mental illness, still hung up to her ex, etc), walk away. Being a 6/10 is not that.>>32012132This will not fulfill you forever. You just admitted you're self-sabotaging out of fear of committing to something actually real. If you want to mess up here then that's on you, but you have a lot of reality checks coming and growing up to do.
>>32012119I'll see when we go out on a date.>>32012123I won't say anything that sounds rude. But isn't it unfair that I THINK that? I don't know don't you think everyone deserves someone that's 100% in love with them or am I being fucking retarded here. Is it okay to think that someone is my second choice while not saying that? Isn't that unfair?>>32012126I won't say that, I just want to know if me thinking like that is okay and fair for her or not.>>32012130Look guys, I can pretend to like her and just bombard her with compliments, I can just do every trick in the book to make her feel special, I am not saying that I can pull that off. I just don't think lying is good.But alrigh the bottom line is, even tho I have my doubts I will go out with her. NEVER make her feel like she's not good enough or anything like that, we'll just have a fun dinner and talk and I'll just see if I like her or not and obviously she'll do the same. I was just not sure if it was okay to go on a date with someone that I am not already 100% attracted visually, but feel like that's okay and that it's part of being a human??
>>32012082>> on what I thinkApparently you missed the part where those numbers aren't subjective. They're mathematical objective reality. It's like coming in here and saying at first you thought it was 40°C, but then you checked and it seemed like only 35°C while it's fucking snowing outside. You're just using them wrong which is the fucking point being made you dumb bitch. If you want to say some subjective shit, say she's hot or something. Don't use things you don't understand.
>>32012149>guys, it is gay to go out to dinner with a woman?buddy, i don't think you're ready for dating.
>>32012149You don't have to visually find your gf/wife 100% the most attractive person, but you have to find the whole package to be satisfactory for someone you'd like to be your partner and to commit to. It's just that if you don't find them attractive physically, there's no point in being honest. What can they even do about that? Just break it off if you're truly not attracted after a couple dates and they'll get the message you personally weren't into them.
>>32012150I swear you autists think that you're all smart and shit, but you guys are even bad in being autistic.what's the n/10 nigga? It's a fucking scale, if I say that 10/10 = HOT and 0/10 = YOUR MOM, don't you think this whole grading simply becomes "subjective" based on my own thoughts like you said?Why tf would you even try to discuss this instead of giving normal advice man.
>>32012170>this whole grading simply becomes "subjective"No. You're just seething that your stupidity got called out.
>>32012180I don't see any new arguments on the explained method mate.
>>32012166To go further about this, your views about relationships also show your inexperience and consequential immaturity. Getting a good relationship is the jackpot. Being with someone you find an 11/10 usually results in you being a sugar daddy to a trophy wife, or getting with a bpd bitch that'll cuck you to oblivion. Getting someone you feel is attractive enough and is good company is the best you can hope for 99% of the time, that's just reality. Of course you always make your spouse feel like the most attractive person on earth, but that doesn't mean it's true looks wise.
>>32012166alright, alright. I think I'm a little bit caught on the fantasy type definition of "love". But I'll try to be more realistic.Thanks a lot man. Wish me luck :D
>>32012205> Getting someone you feel is attractive enoughIdk she looks very cute on some picture and very ugly on the others, idk how tf that works. Her eyes are beautiful tho.Maybe it's just the fucking camera and I'll get a proper idea when I see her irl, that's what matters the most anyways.
>>32012215Yeah see her IRL. Of course if you don't feel attracted at all after that then forcing it would be a bad idea. Just ask yourself "would I be able to feel good banging her?". Good luck anon.
>>32012215>very cute on some picture and very uglyIt means she's ugly, but on some pictures she's used more filters/angles/makeup to disguise this.>>32012235>would I be able to feel good banging herThere's always the trusty paper bag (for her) and alcohol (for you) combo.
>>32012246> It means she's uglyI think you might be right, but hope you're wrong anon
>>32012021Yea, I broke this off. The more I looked at her instagram the less I found her appealing, I really cannot do this. I told her that I was bipolar. Fuck me man...
